This is a discussion on Am I immatured n unreasonable? Shld I ask him to pay? within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; Originally Posted by LoVeS since he insist baby's father isnt him then when DNA is out of coz he have ...
I am new here and chanced upon this thread. I feel sorry regarding your current situation.
So how's your legal advise going on today? It is good?
I actually have something to share with you.
Make sure that you have it done in BLACK and WHITE that he doesn't want the child anymore. I have this friend, P, who is only 20 this year, (baby born last year, and she is only 19) is currently waiting to file for seperation and divorce 3 years later. Her husband, L, is only 21 this year. Initially, L (they are not even ROM yet when P was pregnant) wanted P to abort the child. Even L's parent told P to abort the child too! After the child was born, L was so irresponsible! He only bring home SGD$400 per month, (because he is in NS), and only give P SGD$100 per month and expect P to stay at home and look after the child. Where as he himself, hang out late at night, go clubbing with another girl every weekend. He only visit his child once a month, and is only for a few hours, and ignore about the well-being of his child until P said she want to file for divorce. L then WANTED TO FIGHT FOR THE CHILD'S CUSTODY!
What I can say is that, never believe a man who is out playing with fire. Man always make empty promises. You will never know when he is true and when he is false. So, make sure you got it down in BLACK and WHITE that he doesn't want the child anymore.
Do save up for your baby's future and not spend those unnecessary money on your BF. Do go ahead for free legal advise. However, if you need a lawyer, do consider carefully. Can you afford one? Get him to settle out of court if in any case that you really need a lawyer. Lawyer fee is not cheap.
No point crying over such guy. He is not worth it. Most importantly now is to take more rest, eat more healthy food to adjust your health back. It is important to take good care of your health now. No matter what, the baby is innocent and is not responsible for what mistake that both parents have done wrongly. He/She ought to have the chance to come to this world and have a healthy life that God has given her.
And since you have already make it clear that the baby is your life now, the more you should take good care of your health, settle your disputes with your BF asap and forget about him.
I think I am nag-gy enough.
+Just a penny of my thought and a short story to share, although in actual fact, the story is long enough to to type for more than 30 minutes.+
whahahahahahaha.. its ok..not that long.. hehehe...
hmm..ytd went for free legal advice..she told me to go to family court..can do it before i deliver...but most probably..the baby hospital expenses i can let him bears some of it now..if cant, i need to keep all the receipts n do all the claimings including baby maintanance after baby is born...
The percentage he hw to bears n baby maintainance depends on hw much is the costs needed to bring up my baby n if his salary is much more higher than me, he have to bear it most...since his wife working n they have no kids yet, she said most probably he bears most of baby expenses..
The custody will be given to me full... cz I'm single mother..he can have the access only...
If he denies that is his baby..DNA test will be carried out.. if the result shows he's the biological father, he have to pay the DNA costs.. tis part i no worry one..cz i know he's the father..he's my 1st man... hahaha.... so i dont tink he dare to denie in court...
Always think positive...
okie. thats good. try to settle everything before you deliver ya. have a good rest and be strong. if you have anything, can just come in here and vent. you can also msn me.
... ya... i also eager to know will he deny.... ... if he deny... i bet he's "RICH" & "CLEVER".... hahaha...
i think he is a complete jerk! if you can, i will want you to go for abortion.
then start a brand new normal proper love life with a man who truly loves you n have a baby with this wodnerful man in future.
certainly not have a baby with such a bastard..
he doesnt give a damn about you at all!!
why do yo you still want him?
wake up girl.. you have wasted enough of your precious time for such an unworthy man, is he really worth you do so much for him?
pardon me if i offend you... the word ABORTION is not in my dictionary... As at now I HATE that word...To ME, my baby & him is two different person.. he maybe a jerk.. BUT my baby is my life... why shld i abort just bcz he dont wanna be wit me...just bcz he's a jerk.. baby is totally innocent .. Like I said my baby is my life..part of my flesh n blood.... i WON'T abort... some ppl try very hard to have a baby but still cant get..for me its a blessing frm god to give me a baby..a gift frm him... before i test, i gt tis feeling I'm preg..after i get to know the results, i luv my baby even more till now..
Hmm..maybe some of you tink its stupid of me to keep it...but i cant abort..i just cant...all tis while i dont even have the intention to abort...my luv for my baby grows stronger as days pass... about izzit worth for me to do so much for him.. He not WORTH IT!! I do all tis for my sake as a mother n for my baby sake...parents will support me till i have a job...after that i'll pay them back..so $$ is not really an issue..futhermore, i can claim baby expenses n baby maintenance after baby is born..
I'm not wit him animore..so now i can focus on my baby.. hehehe.. cant wait to know my baby gender seh.....
If i get to know a guy..the guy must accept my child 1st...if not he wont be the one for me..that the last in my mind...my priority is my child..... to nurture n educate him to become better person....
Always think positive...
Yeah!! no abortion.. i rather "abort" the father than my baby... hahaha..
yes, abortion is cruel..but mayb cheekyprincess has a reason to y she said dat? mayb she is worried for sri too...as in her future..but of coz i dont encourage abortion..it is a life in there
but no matter what..no abortion..i wanna see my baby ... hahaha... emotionally attached to my baby ... ...
Btw cheekyprincess....Frm tis forum..besides getting all the knowledge..i learn new words to describe him.. Cold blooded, @sshole n JERK.. whahahahahahaha.... I never use such words on him lei... Widen my vocab on him.. ......
Always think positive...
sri i just name dat idiot to cold blooded beast i am moving on and if you need a someone i am here for you
Hahaha.. icic... now i know what it stands for.. thks Loves..
No one can physco me to abort... hahaha... even mum cant.. I luv my baby lots!!!
LoL...but ...now i very sad lei... i just get to know his leg dislocated...tis is the 3rd time lei..same leg i suppose... sigh.... now on the operation theatre.. I so nervous.. haha.. dont know y when he sick ar.. i sayang sayang him alot... but then again... ppl said its retribution..recently kena accident now dislocated... friends said i too compassionate.. ppl do wrg to me, no matter what i'll try to forgive the person.. sigh... soft hearted .. but i still stand firm on getting my baby maintanance... for my baby ..not for me...
Always think positive...
Happen to chance upon this thread. I must agree that you're indeed a strong woman. And of course, abortion is a NEVER thing to do. It's a gift from God.
But being a single mum might not be easy. I really hope that you can manage your time well after baby is out.
Also, God bless you to have good health and a healthy baby. Rest more and if possible, take in more tonics.
Your ex is really a bastard. How can he have a affair outside when he's married and worse still, make you pregnant. He's unforgiveable!!!
I'm glad to see that you love your baby so much. I can understand how you feel. Our baby is our life. We live for our babies. You can always come back here to ask for help if you really need. dont't mind asking you, how old are you?
Hope that your baby's maintanance fee procedures is going smoothly. God bless you and your baby!!!
ya..agree..difficult..if there's a will, there's a way..hope God will guide me along.
He make me pregnant is not his fault totally..its our fault...but i mad at him for sticking by his parents decisions than his responsibility towards his child n me... for me its unforgiveable.......
Ya...my baby is my life...baby is part of me oredi... I'm 22yrs old...
Thks alot for the wishes..... I hope it goes smoothly too...
Always think positive...
Wow, you're as same age as me!!! Im also married with a baby girl.
I understand the feeling of your partner siding his parents instead of you. Cause I've been through it. My dear husband always like to say that I'm too sensitive or I'm being unreasonable when his parents make negative comments about me.
So, I've learn to put all my attention on my girl and my work. I always believe, depend on yourself than to depend on others. Even Husband is not trustable and reliable.
It's the pressure and comments my dear husband make thats why I decide to come out to work and learn to be independent.
Men can never be trusted. No matter how deep we're in love with each other, circumstances will force one to reveal his/her real colour.
I hope that you'll be able to find a good job once you've settle down your baby. =)
Maybe im wrong.. i dont know. but I have a friend 5 yrs ago. she was pregnant and with this asshole i hate very much, dont have proper work n sex wit alot of other woman. my friend too blinded n told me the same thing too.. that she wants to keep the baby becus it belongs to her as well.
as her friend, i can only be by her side..
but 2 yrs down the rd, she commited suicide.
she cannot take the stigma n heart pain whenever the father is out with another woman not caring for the child n family. i thin she harbours thoughts that he will come back to her for the child.
sometimes, she hits n sort of like abuse her child when she is angr w e father..
its too hard for her evn with the help of her family.
but you must be sure that you will be able to handle all the stress that will come along the way..
i wish you all e best.. jiayou!