This is a discussion on A Comment on Facebook within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; After a talk with dear husband, which ended in a quarrel about our lowsex marriage (<5x for 3yrs), me in a ...
After a talk with dear husband, which ended in a quarrel about our lowsex marriage (<5x for 3yrs), me in a fit of anger, wrote a comment on facebook "Living Widow = No sexlife Marriage"
I told dear husband what i wrote and after he returned home frm his nite shift, he on his laptop to view the comment on facebook and shouted at me when am i going to remove the comment. I told him the comment can't be deleted and he stared and yelled loudly at me you happy now? He did not't talk to me for whole day. dear husband is a very "face" conscious pax and some of his close colleagues are my facebook friends. He's afraid that his colleagues will see that comment.
That comment doesn't say anything much. Instead of looking at our almost-ruined relationship, he's treating me this way just becoz he felt that he has lost "face". His face more important than me. I shdn't have wrote that comment but can't accept why he's treating me like this.
you can erase the comments from facebook....
if it's on the shout-out box, there's an option "clear"
if it's in the general comments box, there's an "X" at the corner.
next time dont post on facebook... design a big poster, write whatever you want, then paste on the ceiling then when your hubby lies on the bed, he can read!!!
err, i think it is not so good to do that on the facebook. I think no matter how it is between both of you all and is kinda his privacy. If let his friends know, he will 'lose face' and embarassed how he going to face his friends or colleagues?
Though it is his fault, but i guess this kind of thing is better to talk to other each only rather than to let the world know
I guess he will be very upset also when you post this in the facebook
I also think that it is kind of respect for your husband loh.....hope both of you can make up and maybe you try to delete the post if possible and apologize to him. Then explain to him that the reason you do this is because you are really very upset upon his behaviour toward you and because you really cared fo this relationship, that's why you reacted this way.
[quote=maine78;137744]After a talk with dear husband, which ended in a quarrel about our lowsex marriage (<5x for 3yrs), me in a fit of anger, wrote a comment on facebook "Living Widow =
No sexlife Marriage,Beloved Baby Sleep With Us "
No Sexlife Marriage,Always Sleep before Hubby Back
No Sexlife Marriage, Sorry Darling Im Too Tired
Maybe it could be due to that, try to show more conern rather than to question him like this? Maybe prepare a drink for him when he is back from work, give him a soft massage on the shoulder but dont make him feel that you want to have intimacy with him.
maybe can try out those tea for him to feel more relax, like lavander or camomile tea, or using aroma oil. Do it for sometimes without having intimacy first...
It probaby due to his work stress i guess
Thanks for yr sayangs, i really need that. have been bottling up my sadness these 3yrs coz can't tell anyone. My close friends are very conservative and we dont talk bout such personal topics. In the beginning, i just accept the reason that he's tired but as time passes by, my unhappiness just doubled and tripled esp when i've tried so many times to explain and tell him how i feel.. It's not just a few months, it's a few years and I'm afraid all my unhappiness will just one day erupt like a volcano and cause me to lose my relationship with my dear husband.
thanks for yr suggestions. We are still a loving couple except the ML prob. I'll prepare him coffee if he work morn shift or gv him massage after his nite shift. He'll prepare "ai xin" breakfast for me if he's off duty or help me bring dear son to the childcare so that i dont have to rush to work. I'm really scared i'll ruin our marriage becoz of this ML prob but i really can't tahan a no sex marriage.
My dear husband is a drinker (3-4x a week) and i allow him to drink coz he say he can -stress when he drink. But he'll still go club and drink his colleagues 1-2x a month. Sometimes i feel that he treat his friends better than me. He really go "all out" for them. Even when he's very tired, he'll still go drink with them till 3-4am. I just can't help wonder, he oredi so tired but still can make time for his friends, why not me? somemore i oredi let him drink at home so frequent
try to tell him to cut down on drinking as it is also effect sex life also. Get him to do excised together instead, it may help
my dear husband also damn need FACE ..........................ive posted some stuff on my blog.... but he very ai-FACE... he very angry....... said stuffs are between us.. we two... good or bad also we two........ why let other know........
now my blog has no more of my emotions/whatever fcukup stuff... only baby's update........
really can delete .........
click the cross
believe miie . im a facebook addict........
even can fliter who can view who cannot view....... so nexttime can purposely post for potential guys to see... so can concern sayang you a bit.,..........ooooooooooooooops
Men r like that, always say no energy, tire, but I think, if can do something to "arouse" their interest, they will be turn on very fast.....
Maybe you try to observe your hubby, see what can turn him on?
My husband also getting old, occassionlly he may also give tire as reason.......I will not force him to do it, but will do other things to "wake him up"...........then he will come beg me........heheheeh
Cannot be too explicit cos I have told some of my colleagues my nic..............kekekeke
Yours is rather simplier tham mine, my husband is also super mcp, i never stop him from doing anything. But as long as you still feel that your husband loves you and family should be ok bah.
But my husband is very high sex drive loh, it is me that is very low sex drink. Infact we also quarrel about this many times, until he became very sian already, then he stop. Most of the time he initial, i like only once or twice a year that i intial hahha. Becos of many issue that i reacted this way also
dont worry and think too much , let it be natural and dont stress him on this
Let's look at this more objectively ...Originally Posted by maine78
When a man go without sex, "is it becoz he doesn't have a woman to bonk"?
Since you are there for him, then the question becomes "is it becoz he has another woman to go to, to get his bonks"?
If you are convinced that is not the case, then the question again becomes "is it becoz he no longer have a tool that can perform"?
If it is indeed an erectile problem on his part, then of course he has every right to be angry at you ... for sharing his secret with all his friends, whether it was intended or not.
Notwithstanding the fact that I'm a papa, this is more than just a "face" problem ... like what some mummies here have suggested, you have displayed a blatant lack of respect for someone who is supposed to be closest to you.
Maybe you have good reasons to, but it's only gonna create a confrontation of the problem ... & not provide a solution to the problem.
Is that what you want?