This is a discussion on How to get along with in law!!!!!!! within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; Originally Posted by serenekbh Sian sian sian dont't know why most of the in law are like that!!!! We're also ...
She lied to me to get me to pay my hubbys gambling debt.
She always get her son to buy 4d, toto for her knowing full well my hubs have a problem with gambling.
LIkes to add fuel to fire! loves to gossip!!! talks like shes fighting!
Loves to cry n drama.
Forever complaining about her hubby! can all me during my work hour (back then) to complain n complain n kbkb until i cannot work. tell her i needed to go back to work she keep talking thn i say i really got to go boss calling i said bye n put down the phone. Next minute she called the hubs said i very rude slam down her phone!!!
Have accused me a lot of things which is not true cos this woman always sides the son! never ever guiding him to the right way, thats y my hubs is always defensive and never admits he's wrong indirectly causing me n our marriage to suffer.
Never ever showed any concern or bought or cooked me anything during my pregnancy. Never went to hospital to visit say dirty! Nothing until baby was out she came, told my confinement lady that she bought abalone for me during my pregnancy which is a BIG LIE!! (cos she was bragging about how beautiful her other grandaughter (from my hubs previous marriage ) is bcos she boiled cordyceps abalone for her to eat during pregnancy!) so my confinement lady asked her how about this daughter in law? did you boil for her and she LIED!! she bought absolutely nothing for me!
Whn baby was down with fever, I told hub to stay home to help me feed her medicine. cos my baby very hard to feed her med, keeps puking out need a lot of attempts only can get it into her guts. so i told him i need him to stay home to help feed baby eat med regularly (since theres only 3 of us at home) but his mom INSIST that he takes her to temple to pray! ( dunnio which god birthday!) knowing that my baby is sick with high fever.
and a lot more i'm lazy to talk about ... cos dwelling in it makes me boil!
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love" 1 Cor 13:13"
when her legs got amputated for diabetes, even her own family said its karma.
Although I believe she badmouths me, i think the relatives have eyes to see what kind of person I am.
Hey sorry if i offended you but be it parents or IL's they need to know that
we 2 loe our kids their advise is valuable not the Law.
that's a good one!!! haha!!!
actually sometimes my hubby will also listen to my mum on certain things. lik got once, i wasnt around and hubby was feeding dear son. he refused to eat and my mum told hubby to add some soya sauce and he gonggong go add! i came back he still happily told me dear son loves soya sauce! i scolded him and he said "mama said the porridge very bland, ask me add abit. i add ABIT only!" then i scolded him "she ask you add you add? you ask you eat shit you also going to eat? hw many times i told you NOT to add alrdy! your mother say cannot add, but did you listen to her?"
I have the same problem with my mum n dad. They always say I dont't love my son, that I punish and scold him too much...Then mum will start..in the past, i never do this to 3 of you. blah blah blah...
Had a big quarrel with them over this many many many times now.
vinder79 > ya . i alw tell him dat now i'm d mother, i have d overall say.
actually i said to my husband before about asking him do it 2 his mom since he feels his mom so god-damn-good. i would say dat he got damn pissed w me after i say it. but i think it works after he calms down n think about it. HAHAHA... but have to b able to handle d 'damn pissed' reaction 1st.
ya all mother in law alot of problem, althought we are not staying together but sure got conflict one..
like when my boy was born and brought back home, she prepare2 small bottle of dont know what water which is yellow in color and want to give my dear boy drink, she say for jaundine. OMG.. my mum and husband already told her baby too much cannot accept this. somemore at that time, my boy jaundine is not a problem just light one why she so fuss..she secertly give my boy drink when no one see it.. i was so DL i found out when the bottle water left half.. i told my hubby and he straight away took it from her cupboard and threw away.. this make her so piss she complain to my mum. my mother in law like to compare my boy to others.. so piss at it..
dont welcome her come, everytime come alot problem.. even she knew my boy was sleeping she will purposely talk loudly ..fish ..
she also like to complain to her sister and mum about me . why i know.. cause whenever saw their sister and mum , they will say say say alot and the mum which was my husband grandma willgave us black face. super unhappy.. ..
she like to anyhow gave my boy eat food when he was not even a yr old and dont know how to munch .. there is once she gave him ate " zar" --> those round red color tibits.. then end up my boy got choke and i was so Dl.. lucky i was beside him if not dont know what will happen . i never show her unhappy face since i know my hubby till we are married and have baby ... not once .. cause i kow she is my IL but sometimes she is really too much..
i got so stress whenever she is here at my house and there's once my health was down cause receive a new that she coming my house to stay for along period of time.. but lucky no . she got things on.
ya agree.. my mum also like to add siy sauce to baby food.. i strongly dont agree.. we even quarrel. but she LppL cause me is full time she cannot control.. my mum not staying with me .. i go her house for dinner and my boy dinner only.. now she also never add soy sauce cause she know is not healthy .. she will boil soup for family and use the soup to cook my boy porridge. haha...
I realise parents & ILs like to say "last time..."
Tell then LAST TIME POLICE WEAR SHORTS!
Thankfully my parents listen to me and dont dare to try anything funny cos I sure scold like mad.
Yeah, inlaws and parents love saying "last time.."
I think I used that last time police wear shorts once on my dad about something, then he keep quiet. haha. Plus a few times i threw back his words at him. (When I was pregnant, my dad tell me that we are the parents, and should not be pushed into listening to other people)..so now when he say "can can", I say "I'm the mother, so I have the full say". Then he keep quiet. haha. Luckily my parents still listen to me, so its easier to handle. Now I'm worried about the conflicts when I move back to my in-laws place.
Can you imagine that my grandma in law actually say next time when cook normal food must put abit of the sauce on the baby's lips so that she can taste and wouldn't be fussy about food next time when she grow up? In my mind at that time, I was like "NO WAY!!! Those normal food have oil, soy sauce, msg inside!! Not when she's at least a year old " Thus I dont't think I'll allow my baby around them when it's cooking/meal time.
Last edited by vinder79; 02-05-2010 at 09:53 PM.
wah... what's wrong w dat woman? say such things to you? got shit for brains. very shallow woman. good dat you tell her off. really no respect. think she's jealous of you.
To get along with mother in law , just say orh orh orh , regardless what she say is correct or not . To do it or not is mine own business ...
do not bother to correct her even if you feel it is wrong .
Try not to engage into long conversation . More talk more wrong.
Best is dont talk .... No talk no wrong...
Yeah I agree with rainbow1234..best is just to say yes yes yes but sometimes really have to try so hard not to answer back!
My bf's mum (future mother in law) is overall ok but the thing about her is she must always have the last say and always want to win. At first not like that but nowadays more and more like that hahaha. Whatever we buy back also she will 'inspect' and then sure will have something negative to say about it. Food that we buy back also the same..she'll try and then most of the time also will have negative comments. Clothes and shoes that I buy for myself also she'll say not comfortable or for shoes, she'll say it has no grip..very slippery. At first I used to be offended and complain to my bf but nowadays I just ya ya ya ya and then forget about it. After all I think she means no harm, maybe just trying to be honest about what she feels
Last edited by momi; 21-05-2010 at 05:39 PM.
I am still practising and practising my patience to get used to it and not take it in too seriously.
Alot of times need to "one ear in, other ear out"
You must understand whatever she says is based on her own opinion. Everyone tastes is different. Maybe she just want to get involved in the conversations as well.
For me the conflict is when they keep listening to other people's advice instead of our own opinions when it comes to my wedding, pregnancy and baby, that's where we clash, and hubby gets stuck inbetween as he has to be the messenger. But nowadays I find that as long as its nothing major, just close 1 eye. Sometimes I'll explain my point of view, if she accepts then fine, if dont't then I just go ya ya ya. Because in the end, they just want the best for us, even though they might not know how to express it or go about the wrong way. of course, have to be reasonable . Any thing that might disturb or hurt my baby, I will unsheath my claws.