This is a discussion on Hubby hardly around. within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; For mummies whose DHs hardly around ie. work late, OT, outstation, etc.....how do you cope everything at home on your ...
For mummies whose DHs hardly around ie. work late, OT, outstation, etc.....how do you cope everything at home on your own esp. emotionally?
My husband works as a Container Equipment Specialist. 3 rotating shifts.. Even on public holidays and weekends if work shoft on.. For the past few years, reunion dinner time he quickly ate and went work night shift and sleep on the 1st day of CNY.. 5 years already.. Really upset .. Pple all having CNY fun, he sleeps and we got to wait for him to have enough rest then go visitation.. Sometime, he sacrifice his sleep but I dont't like as no good for the body and dangerous if not enough rest as he needs 100% concentration at his work..
Being the family of a shift worker, esp the wife needs lots of patience and understanding.. There were so many time that I felt so lonely esp during Sundays and PHs.. Esp when the 2 are young and I cannot be mobile with twi young kids.. Now they are 5yo and 3yo , I am more easy with going out but they have other needs , noisy and fighting on the whole outuing etc.. sigh..
My husband is 2/3 of the time at home, I always say.. He has only a close good friend and plays badminton once a month with his brothers and friends.. So far, Im quite adjusted to his work schedule lei, except upset over his company approving his leave application.. There was once, our mission trip is only confirmed 1 day before the set off date as the company can only approved it then.. sigh , really headach if we wanna plan holidays etc.. But so far tight budget thus no long holidays , but in future, how huh?? sigh ..
One great advantages of shift work is we can go shopping at off peak time, avoiding the crowds but wwe do miss out on some special discount and promotion on weekends/PHs.. If really must get the items, I'll go jeong myself with my 2 ..
Forum is good or even support group with good friends in the neighbourhood is really essential to keep mothers, esp housewife happy and in touch with the society.. I'm gald I have a couple of good friends in my neighbourhood now.. Treasuring and enjoying each moments together..
My dear husband dont work shift but he works till late at nite. Sometimes must wait until 2-3am in the morning to c him. Sometimes he leaves home as early as 6am. As he needs to drive, thus not able to call n tok most of the time. Sometimes will need to wait til he's back then can tok .
I love to read so I will go to the Library to borrow childcare books to read.
Many childcare books are very nice and there is a wide range at Central Library.
Hubby not around, concentrate on the children . Children need attention constantly.
Looks like I have to be more independent.........
Just have to put with mother in law's calls constantly. Always asking where dear husband is? Why always work so late? isisnt not enuf $$$? etc..........
I still have to take care of everything from the ceiling to the floor of the house as well as $$$ & dear son. Really tiring to one leg kick everything .........
husband on 2 rotating shifts - 12hrs
husband entitled to off day 1/wk but always shorthanded so off = burnt by company. If he doenst co-operate to work OT, his variable bonus will b greatly affected. When he sick, he dont dare take MC so take leave cos MC will end up lesser bonus. husband often dont have time to eat with us, not to talk about spending a good holiday. Eg next wk, 1wk hol for son cos PSLE marking day but he cant off/take leave. How nice would it be if can go hol, Genting also can - non peak!
before he works shifts, he works in a shop 12 to 14hrs/day 7 days a wk incl PH. I had a bit of adjustment problem cos 1x mummy n always alone. I did ran away fm married home twice .....
Last edited by Angelmum; 11-10-2007 at 04:45 PM.
Angelman Syndrome Rare Genetic - deletion of Chromosome 15
My husband will change to a 12-hr shift patten next year, not sure whether good or not.. The 2nd day of a new shift is subjected to their manpower status.. Always have this feeling of the company owning my husband and family time.. sigh.. And 2 days of MC/year, the in charge also threaten affecting aprraisal.. sigh.. Like no time to have family outing or tour..
My dear husband is wrking in govt sector....seldom come back hm.sometime even if he say that he will be coming back or coming back early also not cfm one..
Plus everytime need to go overseas for training..n each trip will usually go 3-4weeks..
For me har..i will usually chat w my mum on the fone..bring kids out for a walk..watch my korean drama...surf forum..n etc...so that i will not feel bored with it..
Beginning....i really feel lonely...bt now i get used to it ..
Being mom is really a noble calling!!
Edited - ran away fm married home twice
1st x during 1x pregnancy - always alone at home
2nd x post-natal depression - helpless, always alone. Nobody to share. Was the first to get married among friends so no common topics + ppl working while I stay at home mum
Now with a special child - cant ran cos there's an invisible string tied onto me!
I thank GOD for forum.. We can have good friends, strong friendship after sometime of nuturing.. It'll be a bonus if we can have some good friendship nutured in our neighbourhood..
Sayang, city.pumpkin, sayang!!
MummySG is !!
sayang aby, sayang pumpkin....
My dear husband work late almost everyday and most of the weekends will be working too. We hardly can chat as when he back will be my sleeping time, only in the morning can chat alittle and he got to rush to work. Sometimes will feel lonely/depressed and cry but luckily I've this forum for me to relieve myself
Mummy SG is like my home to me.
Msn me k, lml and city.pumpkin .. Me @ firstname.lastname@example.org.. Cheers!
MummySG is No. 1
Last edited by aby; 12-10-2007 at 12:13 PM.
some MILs just call to ask for money...
tink just explain to her nicely ...your husband's company need him to work late cos shorthanded, if dont do it may affect his work performance ...maybe you can go over n visit her when free, who noes, she might turn out to be your best friend
Same here, my dear husband works late till 9+, 6 days a week and at least once a week home late for entertainment, but glad that at least he got Sunday for us. I always feels why I am the only one who got this problem and as and when will bring this out and show him FACE haha .. but now I know I am not alone...
(of cos I am not happy that I am not the only one who suffer )
Quote : lml2402
Originally Posted by city.pumpkin
Last time depressed but dont know on-line can make friends and share so always in my turtle shell. Now I everyday on-line to release steam/pressure + play games. err, too much time on net so a lot housework piling.
Hahaha.. ya man.. I have one big pile of laudry here .. Heehee.. Tk GOD my husband took over all the laudry since the time I in D ..
Praise GOD, both me and husband changed after the D period.. He accepted that being a stay at home mum is really not easy thus help out now.. Sometime i paisay, as i did less than him, I busy at work and in th here .. Then me, become submissive.. Me used to be very bad in my words one.. He always kenna until knock the wall .. Heehee.. Pls visit my blog to know more about us k? http://anewleaseoflifehope.blogspot.com/