this is a chicken and egg question, can his heart contain more than one person? Can he also have your family members in your heart?
Man r like that, dont "fist fight" w them, the tougher you r, the more they resist.
When I first met my husband, he usually quoted his sis and mother. It took me long time to slowly "feed" him the information, guide him, educate him, to let him know that tho I much younger than his sis and mum, but I always have his interest at heart, and I am more streetwise and more "thoughtful" than them. Little by little, I changed his opinions, I opened his eyes and ears.
He always think that I am always trying to make plans against his family, I always show him that I am a fair person, I treat his family and my family equal. If I treat my family better, I always explain why. Like I let my sister stay in our house w/o demanding for allowance cos last time my sis supported me when I go Uni, and she also helped to take care of my gal when she was young. I demanded allowance from his sister who is staying in our house ( tho she bo give), cos last time my hubby supported her when she go Uni, I told my hubby you cannot always spoon feed her, she is already in her 40s, how long we must take care of her.
Every dollar she spend, my gal w have one dollar less to receive when we die.
I always "reason" it out with my husband, to me, except for parents whom we are indebted to, I told him we can help our other family members, but provided we are not taken advantage of and not taken for granted. Like the other time, when his elder sis called for help to share the medical cost of her son, we gave, but in the end, shortly after, she bought a new car.
It was through all these lessons, that I proven to my husband that family members are important, but we are not idiots, we also have to think of our own daughter's benefit.
In fact, I suspected some of hubby's nieces and nephews (in Msia) may plan to come to Sg to further study, I already warned him that we cannot help to pay for their cost. My husband has already said that I m selfish, cos its better of for them if they could leave Msia and come to Sg. I told him I agree w him, but if thats the case, then I w not want to have another child cos I w be busy supporting other pp's child. finally he give in.
Man r like that, dont fist fight w them, show them the "proof".