This is a discussion on I TRUST my partner!!!! within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; Originally Posted by mamapenguin I'm sorry some of you mommies have unfaithful hubbies. It must be heartbreaking. It can happen ...
yes, faithful spouses do exist. But if some women are too confidentially to trust their husband, things will happens. As outside world, many things can happens.
Why do you have doubts in my husband when I do not? He is a handsome, confident man who happens to love his family more than life itself. He has done everything, EVERYTHiNG, in his power to ensure that should anything happen to him, we will be well taken care of. While I love him so much for that, I'd rather have him alive and well.
He gets picked up by other women... and gay men. I've seen it so I believe it. So what. By the way, we do not wear wedding rings
For me, I believe in solid evidence, whether sms, emails or anyone telling me seeing him with a lady etc, will do my own part without fail , will never ever ignore it not becos I dont't trust him but I rather say I want to protect myself fm getting hurt if it really turns out to be true! The earlier I discover, there may be higher chances of marriage being saved if not the impact of getting hurt won't be that great too compared to being betrayed for yrs!! I do not want to live with regrets...so long I have tried my best to look into the matter n if nothing progresses, I just leave it. If not, tackle it n won't keep silence! Women have our rights!
my fiance DO tell me about those girls tried to pick him up n stuff.. but i dont feel that he is trying to prove to me anything. its just part of our convo.. after all we are in diff countries so we update each other on this n that. i do tell my fiance if guys try picking me up in clubs or stuff and we both just laugh it off. we r not trying to prove to each other that we r faithful bcos, we dont need to prove, our actions shows it all.
i think as a woman, you shld be able to trust your OWN judgement. you chose this man to be your husb. but if you have any doubt about him, then i believe the trust you have in him is very vulnerable and can be broken at the slightest touch.
of cos, i cannot say that my husb will never ever betray me, cos i dont know about the future. all i know is he loves me too much NOW to do anything unfaithful to me. i dont want to live a life of worrying n thinking whether my husb will betray me or cheat on me one fine day or not.. cos for all i know, this ONE day might never come..
but if that one day really comes, then just too bad for me that he has a change of heart...
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
Couple shouldn't doubt one another.
In fact, a "doubting" couple relationship will never be amiable and happy.
So try to do things to build on the confidence level instead.
The problem faced by some mummies here is because they found some leads or hints that their spouse are eating "wild strawberries"....
yap I agree with you, I also trust my hubby but even he himself also say before we can't predict the future (which I agree) most important is now we must trust and respect each other.
I believe all the mommies here will love to trust their hubby, who wouldn't but because of those tell tale signs which is so obvious which they can't ignore and can't blame them for not trusting.
No matter what most importantly, we must love and protect ourselves so that we wouldn't do stupid stuff to hurt or harm our family.
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I feel so sad for the ladies here who have had cheating partners. How painful it is!
For me I do trust my husband, he is definitely not the type to go around cheating as he places family first. I know his character and how he is. If he does cheat, I know it's because something is wrong.
This would be a different take on cheating as my husband has cheated before, while he was back in Singapore for a couple of months as I was emotionally, physically and mentally exhausted from being his carer as he suffered depression so his parents agreed to look after him there while I get myself better. Unfortunately he did not get better in Singapore, he actually got worse because he was mixing with the wrong group of friends who would be drinking excessively and visiting some kind of Thai nightclub. He became emotionally involved with one of the girls working there. He also became a totally different person while he was in Singapore.
You can imagine how angry I was when I found out and especially the way he told me. He smsed me one day to come to Singapore or he will lose himself to another girl. I was furious because I spent the last 2 years looking after him and trust me, looking after a baby is so much easier than looking after someone who is sick like this.
Anyway to cut the story short, I went to Singapore, demanded he come back to Perth as I knew something was not right mentally. I did some research and found that he had traits of someone with bipolar which then explained why he had the highs - thinking himself invincible and taking risks like this affair. He was just not himself. I brought him back to his psychiatrist and told him the symptoms and we finally got him correctly diagnosed as having Bipolar type II with frequent cycling. FINALLY after 2 years of hell. His meds were changed and he was given the right mix and a couple of months later (after baby was born), he was back to being the same man I married. Slightly damaged, but nevertheless the man I knew and loved.
Yes I know he was sick when he cheated, and even so it hurt very much. It hurt even more knowing that it wasn't all his fault though he did play a part in it. He was very remorseful when he got well and knows he was not himself. I trusted him 100% before this incident and now that it has passed and he is well again, I trust him 100% now.
That's my story
Last edited by pokemon97; 22-09-2011 at 04:04 PM.
I know my husband and he's a very transparent kind of person and he is not easily tempted. He's also not exactly the type of man women will try to hit on.
I completely trust my husband. I feel the day that I start snooping around his phone, emails and checking his bag, that will be the day our marriage will end. Trust is very important in a marriage. No trust, no marriage. Oh, my husband travels quite a bit. In fact, he just told me that he'll be off the Shanghai in a few weeks for a weekend. And my first question, 'Honey, can you check that you can get time off since you're traveling over the weekend so that we can spend more time in Spore for Christmas?' No questions like,"What? You sure you not bring your girlfriend there?"
I trusted my hubby and thought that the last thing he would do is do cheat on me. Alas! I discovered he betrayed me emotionally with one of his colleague through his mobile.
My family members all think that he is a faithful husband.
How to regain the trust? Still struggling with my emotions...
cause i find that is mental betrayal .. as all guy will look at other woman as long as not physical sex , i trying to accept that but of cause i got argue about this to him.. he know how i feel.. but for me who knows ,guy usually use their below to think when they see someone sexy or suit their taste bud .. so i protect myself first..
And when ever we qurral i only aim the things that happen now and never bring up the see gal issue.. this help cause he wont feel that im aiming him and he will pay more attention to what i going to say rather then he find me nagging...
I feel it's human nature to look when we see something good or someone really attractive.. Infact btw my partner and me, we would point out to each other if we spot someone who we think is hot... He reads him mags such as fhm Uk and arena with spreads of scantily clad ladies as me with cosmo and metalhammer( yes, I find dudes with painted face and tattoos hot)..
Ultimately we know we 'belong' and love each other and needn't worry about the other lusting over someone else...
7 yrs and 2 girls on... We're still in love, and dont't need a marriage cert to prove that...