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my true story

This is a discussion on my true story within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; i think its time for me to share my story. i came from a broken family, i was given to ...

  1. #1
    Female Attendant
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    Feb 2010
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    Unhappy my true story

    i think its time for me to share my story.
    i came from a broken family, i was given to my grandparents after my parents were divorced. i do not know what is mother's love till today. since young i wanted to start my own family becos i longed for it.

    i was pregnant when i was only 15 yrs old, i was married to a 18 yrs old, not knowing what is love and what is a marriage. yes, things dont work out and i divorced. my gal is called melissa. i was granted her custody. i worked for 13 hours as a cashier that time to make sure i earn enough for her.

    i met a guy at my workplace and another kind of life started. 4 yrs of of are/s which i thought everything will be alright tis round.i was pregnant again and we decided to get married. bt, i caught him having affairs with other woman, not one bt many. i had a miscarriage the next day and on the same day, i pack my things and leave. i lost 10 kg, everyday dreaming all alone,

    i went around have sex with guys i dont know and mix around with bad companies and i started to abuse drugs, tis went on for a few days when one of the bad friend ask me to smuggle china ppl to los angelas, i did it for money and i was arrested, jailed in germany for 3 mths, i quit my drugs there and ever since i did not touch again till now. that moment, melissa was the only one i cant get rid of my mind, i realized i have forsaken her these few yrs.

    i was back to singapore on 23rd dec 2004. again, a man called patrick came to know me, a gentleman looking who is very diff from my circle of friends. after 8 mths, we got married, and gave birth to my second dau, melinin. we had our own flat as well, bt i still dont know why things would turn out to be ugly again, i dont understand. i did not fight for the custody tis time, my view has changed.

    i bear with the pain to part with melinin becos i know i am not able to provide her the best if i gotta support 2 of them. when i was so so so down, another man came into my life, kelvin. i wondered why do i fall in love with someone so easily. in my whole life, being together with kelvin is the biggest mistake i have ever made. i have never come across a man who take drugs almost everyday, gamble everyday, tell lies everyday.

    i must keep my facebook password, msn password to myself cos he would use my acc to borrow money from my friends. i must hide my money and atm card otherwise my money will be gone in just a few seconds. why should i go through all these? is there never a sucess for me in are/s? my love and tears seems cheap. only the god knows my suffering, i swallow every bits of pain down to my throat, no one else know.

    i bear with the pain to call the police to get kelvin arrested, he thinks i love it bt its not true. i feel painful bt i have no choice. to think that the IO told me they can do nothing as the drug he taken is not a controlled drugs. he carried on the drugs, its the 3rd your now, we rented a rm from others, he melissa and me staying in that rm, every sunday melinin coming hm till next morning. i cant see any better future together with him, he seems like a devil more to me, he is evil.

    he deliperately provoke my 2nd ex husband and now i am allowed to see melinin again. i am tired, sickening, i want to move out of his life, bt he will continue to make things difficult for me, i dont know hw am i to overcm tis disaster.
    i ord had two failed marriage. melissa is ord 11 yrs old, melinin is only 4, my life is a mess

  2. #2
    Worthy Lady tika's Avatar
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    Jul 2009
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    Re: my true story

    Get help my dear. Professional counsellor can help you. It's not healthy for you to stay with this devil called Kelvin. For the sake of your Melissa, move out immediately and divorce him. He may do unimaginable things to your Melissa behind your back and she may be too afraid to tell anyone. And after divorcing him, stay single long enough to build a better life for both you and Melissa. It's time to Think with your head, not your heart my dear.

  3. #3
    Worthy Lady
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    Oct 2009
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    Re: my true story

    Dearie, Tika is absolutely right. Get professional help if you may not be able to do this or go through this entirely on your own.

    You cannot stay with this Kelvin anymore and you know the reasons.

    I dont't know your age but regardless, it is never too late to make a complete break from the sickening past (which was not good for you) and make a fresh start.

    The Sun rises up afresh each morning and this gives hope that you have the chance to make changes. Some people who are seriously ill or bedridden dont't have the chance to start it all over again...

  4. #4
    Female Attendant ChanelleHugo's Avatar
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    Jan 2010
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    Re: my true story

    Please think for your gals this time.this is serious, i believe all mummies here r very worry what your kelvin might do to her n you when he abuse drugs...
    please move out asap..
    you are still very very young so please leave him and move on with your life... you will lead a beta life after this... believe in yourself n tel yourself you must do it... for the sake of your 2gals n yourself...

  5. #5
    Pure Consort Ting's Avatar
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    Jul 2007
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    Re: my true story

    hi kym, im sorry to hear about your plight.
    but the first thing you need to do is, seek professional help.
    you can try looking up uncle sam, his nick is masayuki, im sure he is able to help you n give you good advices/solutions.

    imo, the reason why you fall in "love" so easily, is bcos you yearn for it too much.
    bcos of what you did not have in the past (your parent's love) you yearn for love from other men to make up for it.
    no offence to you, but, you NEED TO WAKE UP N STOP WALLOWING IN SELF PITY.
    you cannot control what happen when your parents left you with your grandparents, but right now, you can control your life with the choices you make.
    one wrong turn leads to another wrong step. 2 wrongs doesnt make 1 right.

    you say you didnt know how it feels to be loved by a mother, now you r a mother yourself, do you want your kids to feel that way too? to grow up in such a bad environment? with their stepdad on drugs everyday! god knows what he will do to your kids when you r not arnd!!!
    you know he is bad for you n your girls, so LEAVE him.
    get help, make decisions n stick to it.
    no one can help you if you do not help yourself.
    everyone make mistakes, when we in love, we r "blinded", n never think of the consequences, but you have already made so many mistakes, you shld be able to see clearly now.

    dont jump into another relationship so quickly. open your eyes n be wise. you have 2 kids with you now, they will give you all the love no man can EVER give you. bcos their love is so pure n so true. they will be your happiness, your joy, your strength, your pillar, your motivation, your will n your reason to live a happy life.
    good things come for those who wait, be patient n a good man will come into your life unknowingly.

    my ex was an ass too, trust me, til now, i still have NO IDEA why i even liked him.
    i left him when my girl was only 5-6 mths old n from then i never contacted him.
    i met many many many guys in btw, dated quite a few, n many of them told me they loved my girl, n wanna marry me n all.
    but nope, i wasnt convinced, i dont wanna risk my girl's happiness.
    til i met my current bf. took me 2 years to actually open my heart n accept him as someone who can really love me n my girl.
    n he did, he loves us really much n always gives us the best.

    you r still young, dont waste your life like that, leave this man, for the better of your children n yourself.

    Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

  6. #6
    Consort-in-Ordinary Phoebii Cheng's Avatar
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    Nov 2008
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    Re: my true story


    Yup agree with what Ting says...get help from uncle Sam aka masayuki in this forum.

    Lead the life that you always wanted to lead for yourself not for others, love your daughters and be happy.

  7. #7
    Worthy Lady
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    Aug 2009
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    Re: my true story

    I agree w the rest.. you shld get help from prof.
    Leave the house, lead your life
    once bitten twice shy...
    Maybe you just hvnt meet e one for you yet..open your eyes wide open..
    If never meet anyone..just work n support you n your daughters..they r your responsiblity..
    dont let those men rule you..you rule yourself or them!!
    Even if you meet someone agn..really take your time to know em n let them know you..
    If they r really sincere about you n your kids ..that ll be great...
    Pls dont fall in love so easily agn...end of the day ..you might b hurting yourself or even your daughterss

    take care n god bless

  8. #8
    Imperial Concubine
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    Aug 2009
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    Re: my true story

    Dear gal,

    Please do not give excuses as you were not loved yourself thus you keep looking for love. What you are doing is not conductive to you or your 2 gals. Understand that your gals being so young might pick up bad habits and bad influence if your BF is doing so as well.

    dont't keep rushing into relationships so fast, ask yourself this question, why are you doing so? Is it because you are lonely or you just want someone to rely on?

    Talk to a counselor and someone who can help. It'll be better for you if you can move out.

  9. #9
    Pure Consort apollo's Avatar
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    Feb 2009
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    Re: my true story

    babe, i strongly agree with other mummies, esp Ting!

    after reading your post, i must say that you REALLY have to do something for yourself and for your girls! your girls are innocent. i hope they will get the necessary love n care from you.

    love and care does not only comes from how you treat them, but also on how you behave, how your life is. your life will strongly affects their lifes too. now you cant see how much they will get affected but as time goes by, as they grow older, as you see how they got affected, you will regret.

    dont get into relationship so fast please! i'm sure after so many times of 'bad' RS, you should roughly now hw to judge and not getting into 'bad' RS n got 'cheated' again.

    you must rmb, now your top priotity is your girls. think for them before making any decision. last but not least, PLEASE seek for help. =)

    take care =)

  10. #10
    Worthy Lady
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    Jun 2009
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    Re: my true story

    if you dont help yourself , who is going to help you , your gal is so pity , they want a mum but with a better personality .. there is no perfect for everyone , but self personality is important in their youth ..
    you can do it ..

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