oh my.. this sounds so vaguely similar... i TOO was depressed and had to swallow my grievances previously and i purposely quit my job so i can take care of my son all by myself. My advice to you is to be very direct and upfront about your expectations. Not like we want to be rude, just want to let them know WHO is the mother. As your baby's mum, you have the right to decide how you want your baby to be taken care of. Our hubs are sandwiched in the middle and trust me, sons will always try to pacify both the mother and the wife and in the end, nothing will change. So, what i did was to talk to my mother in law MYSELF and tell her what i want and if i dont like what she did, i just tell her straight in the face that i dont want. Your mother in law might talk about you behind your back to ALL of your relatives, but to me, as long as i get what i want for my baby, i dont care much about what others think. Stay strong babe!