This is a discussion on when others confide in you... within the Home Life, Relationships & Finance forum, part of the You and Your Family category; Do you sometimes feel very frustrated and upset because one too many people shared their problems with you and you ...
Do you sometimes feel very frustrated and upset because one too many people shared their problems with you and you can neither help nor talk about it with anyone?
if they were acquaintances and just friends or strangers (ie, forum ppl) then no i wont feel frustrated. i just give my opinions n suggestions, whether they wanna follow it or not, it is their decision and choice. we can only help this much cos we do not know them well. but i agree with apollo, i cannot stand those who seek advices yet cant listen in and perhaps try it out. they just reject straightaway, which i find, if you r venting, then dont ask for advices. no point you ask for suggestions n solutions yet dont try it out.
there is no one advice that can solve all your problems, only ones that help minimise the damage or help to make it better.
if they r my close friends, yes i would sometimes feel frustrated n helpless if i cant offer tham good advice. seeing them getting so upset and lose sleep n appetite makes me very upset too. but knowing them well enough, i know n try hard to make them happy instead.
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
I talk to my dog
Yes I do feel sad when I can offer no form of help.
I think it's normal to feel that way and it only goes to show that you care for the person who's pouring his or her heart out to you.
But I guess, sometimes all they need is a little support and that listening ear which is not prejudiced or biased, someone who can understand what they feel and can feel it together with them.
For people like them, usually I would get back in touch with them to see how have their situation changed or improved and then continue to encourage them.
I guess just knowing that someone cares, really does go a long long way.
In terms of giving advices. I say what I can, whether or not they accept it, it's their choice. At the end of the day, they themselves hold the key to unlock that door out of their problems.
For forum and people I dont't know very well, I'll be ok as its up to them in the end, plus dont't really know their exact situation, so what I can only do is advice them best to my abilities, the rest is up to them.
But for friends, the best I can is to be listening ear, if I can help I'll do my very best, however most of the time, they just need me to be their listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. And I'll try my best to cheer them up.
There are also people, who just keep confiding and confiding though, like 1 wave after another, neverending story. Its like everytime when we talk, its about that person's problems/troubles and nothing else and it has been going on for years! That type really drains me.
Yes, it's the people you're related to and close to that hits you the hardest, even if it's not exactly your problem. Knowing about it and knowing there's little or nothing that can be done just doesn't help. Best friend has prob with bf, cousin has prob with daughter, mother in law has prob with sister In law... sigh...