This is a discussion on EDD April Mummies within the Year 2012 Mummy forum, part of the Mummy Meeting Place category; Originally Posted by Jofeny hee hee.. dont know who will go first... mine is 9th apr.. you remember anxiousmummy? dont know how ...
I took his i phone, nothing i just want to see and read what inside thete, but suddenly i saw a msg.from a gay friend his high school friend then i read their conversations i really fed up with their jokes, i really cannot tahan. . .
On some days, I will suddenly feel like crying. That day I just say, hubby I feel like crying, then I just tear. I think I will feel like crying when I feel heavy or unwell, breathless. Feels trapped.
just relax, go take a shower. Listen to radio, class 95 especially at night. The songs r very smoothing at night. Our hormones r in a mess now too, that's y emotionally is like roller coaster. N anxious of baby too.
just relax ok. Distract yourself.
Relax!! Huh you get upset just because after reading jokes conversation between your hubby & his "gay friend". Hmmm.. Sometimes horomones really super messy (*like what jofeny said),you can let out by crying..but not too often also.
Wow I thought you just cry n let out... Omg... your hubby really poor thing.. Punch & pinch by you.
Hmmm.. you got to really control yourself .. Actually sometimes we can totally blame on hormones it's not like uncontrollable.. you just have to avoid things that make you upset.. Think of happier things n do something that make you happy.
So far I have come by a friend who is very violent to her hubby during her pregnancy.. So can't control her feelings.. and she keep biting and pinching her hubby whenever she was Upset with anything. When we saw her hubby his whole arms are fill with bruise ..biting blue black marks all over. Imagine this friend has been torturing her hubby for months.. At least 6 mths. Her emotions gone crazy when she is at her 3rd month of preggie..
Her hubby never seek help & this friend continue to bite & pinch cos her hubby thought this could relieved his wife stress n continue coping with her pregnancy. But no.. This friend end up having post natal depression after giving birth... & continue biting the hubby.. But this time .. One day his hubby can't take it anymore give a tight slap to my friend.
This time .. End up her hubby having mild depression.. Very scared of his wife for a period of time (about a few months), he can't bring himself to get intimate with her & avoiding her. He then went to visit a psychrist. He recovered after some counselling & medication.
This doesn't end.. She given birth a healthy girl. But when girl is about 8mths.. She start going around biting & pinching people. Thats very scary.. Her girl can bite other kids or pinch them till bled. So far this is the most extreme case I saw. I never dare to carried her girl after once got bitten by her.
End up her girl need to go tru some counselling & special teaching to get her back to the right pace.
Thats why I believe that you got positive... tell yourself you can do it.. Jia you !! you can control your emotions .. Once you allow emotions control you too much.. you lost yourself which is so dangerous! Keep yourself always happy !! Pack your baby stuff etc.
Jia you !!! Chrio you can do it !!
Good Morning Mummies,
@ Dilys and Jofeny,
Thanks for the advice I really dont want to do that i really cant punch and pinch him coz i am weak, i really cant move so much, lucky, if not i kick his butt, i am just worried about my baby coz i really cant control my emotions as i cry so hard, yes really need to distract myself or else i suffer in this hormones imbalace. . .:-(
Oh sorry my mistake I thought you already pinch & punch your hubby. Hmm.. Once awhile you cry to let go really it's okie but seems like you are always down ! Maybe you worried too much. you shouldn't be worrying so much as you have a wonderful family (hubby & in laws) taking care of you well.
Why dont't you spare some time on think how are you going to take care of baby,how to be a good mum after baby"s arrival? Read some books... It will occupied alot of your time, keeping you very very busy & tired. I suggest you reading up on books like how to breastfeeding, newborn development,how to bathe your baby etc.
So far if you have been doing these .. I m sure you will be able to distract your emotions & will be very confidence & positive.
really have to control yourself.. If got into drepression.. you will suffer, baby will suffer (*you can't breastfeed) then your hubby will suffer also ( *have to take leave & look after you.)
Chrio .. Tell yourself you r doing great ! you r wonderful & strong for already 8th mths ..... Soon you will be seeing the fruit in just 2 or less mths . Hugs hugs !!
Cry when you need to, nothing wrong with crying and worried about the baby. Well, I can only quote what my gynae said, you have already walk the walk for 8 mths and what is another 2 mths to go. you have already hang on, why not let the positive thoughts flow. The most difficult part has already past, even if you were to give birth now (touch wood), the baby can survive in the outside world as you have already past the benchmark ie 24 weeks. So now the only thing you can do is to have lots of positive thoughts. Take this chance to rest, can you imagine, how busy will you be when the baby is out? you will be able to move alot but you have a baby to take care of and all things will be different.
Hope all these will help. Jia You..
We are here for you if you need someone to talk to... but I always believe to have lots of positive thoughts will help you to move on.
Sometimes when you r worrying 1st when the thing havent even happen... At the moment you really can't think of a solution. Then it will become a stress.
Being a mum.. Really never ending of worries once the baby is out !! Mummies are just great !!
Sorry mummies.. Not that I want to add on to any negativity.. Think maybe now it's easier to feel blue than happy..
My mother in law reminded me to get infant care for baby if I'm really going to work. The way she say "you need a place to put the baby, you got no choice".. frankly, really no choice meh?
Suddenly felt baby is so unwelcome. My in law side r well to do but as I mentioned, my father in law dont allow my mother in law to volunteer to take care saying that they want go tour round the world n not take care of baby. My mum side is the traditional side, because baby is my hubby surname, she dont want to jump out n help cos it reflect badly on my in laws ESP they r well to do n both not working.
Yest my mother in law reminded me again my father in law felt that the baby is too fast for us, n blame us never plan again. he says ideally should have 2 years of 二人世间 before have baby. Say we dont know what baby means.. Etc.. The potential conflict that baby will bring to both of us.. When we r just learning to stay with each other by ourselves..
My friend asked me.. If it's my grandson coming out, will I b so eager to help take care? I say.. A bit too early for me to think.. But if I'm well to do n I know my son is just doing ok, I might suggest get a maid n put the baby with me until baby bigger then go child care.. Instead of going infant care at 4th month. If I really need tour then can do other arrangement.. But no.. The tone is.. If you go work, just get a infant care n put there.. Wa... Really a bit sian..really felt so heartless... Until frankly I dont know what to feel... Not that I'm expecting them to help totally.. But I just feel that my hubby n my baby are so alone..
1) will not have a conflict of disclipinary methods (after reading so much about your in law, I'm sure you might have more conflict if you leave the kid to them).
2) the baby will be more independent in days to come.
3) you will have more freedom to voice out anything that concern about the baby.
Honestly, I would agree that infant care will be a better option for you. As for whether is the baby too fast for you & your hubby, there is nothing to prove or plan.. there is nothing call ideally... Since ppl can think about the potential conflict the baby will bring, then you should think about the counter attack of the potential conflict and find solution to all these conflicts.
Just being kaypo, will you be staying on your own after delivery? Or any intend to stay with them? If you are going to stay on your own, why bother, they will not be around to witness all these conflicts..
Please do not feel that the baby is unwelcome, think about those who wants to have a baby yet they can't for one reason or another? We are already so blessed that we can have one!
Hi Mummy Dilys, 2ndtimemum and Jofeny,
To tell you all honestly, i am so blessed by our God indeed i can't count in my fingers start from my family in laws, my bosses in my company, friends including i have all of you here in mummy sg and loving husband, hormones, hormones pls.pls. dont let me down and feel blue coz i need to be happy and positive for my little Prince. . .
Really appreciate your advice mummies pray all mummies to have a sage and smootj delivery. . . .
strollers...anyone got good recommendation? We wanted one that can be an infant car seat..can fix ontop of stroller that kind..
anyone bought that kind of stroller?
Hugs hugs!! If I were you.. I will put baby in infant care ! dont't let all these these affect you I am sure you will be strong to take care of baby without the help of your in laws.
Dont be bother about your in laws .. Now they even say such things already then no need to find anything to explain about which hospital you r going to stay. Not that we r being unfillial .. But sometimes such evil in laws should be given a big slap on their face... Tell them straight.. you r too nice to give in.
dont"t feel baby is unwelcome... Most important is you & your hubby hand in hand. Anyway no one is to blame you n your hubby to have baby so fast or not it doesnt matter to them... Anyway they are not going to look after then why they bothered.
Just now I was telling your case to my hubby.. He said : " if it's my parents I will tell them off". If you r not staying with in laws then dont't go back to your in law place. Must have your own stand! Baby is you n your hubby. Haha .. He said if he see your father in law he will slap him for you. Hmmm .. Sorry Hubby very pissed.. Angry for you !!
Jia you !! Jofeny ...
Ladies. Just want to congratulate everyone for having come so far in pregnancy. Especially those who had to endure morning sickness and any other discomfort. Third trimester is usually the hardest, at least for me. Cos I feel very clumsy and slow. It is also the time when people start to hurl advises at you, usually out of goodwill but sometimes confuses us new mummies. And not forgetting the fear of the unknown... Labour. Just want to encourage everyone to not be fearful. But just take everything in your own stride. At your own pace. Baby is yours. You have ever right to decide and do what is best for your baby. Personally I experienced an immense surge of strength post delivery. The power of maternal instincts was really strong. I was behaving way stronger in personality and physical self than what I would usually be. Of course with a lot of prayers, I pulled through. Looking back I was really proud at how I went through my first pregnancy. dont't think of the unnecessary everyone and just count your blessings! You will get there!
always paranoid at the back of my mind.
Today drama again.
My mother in law (father in law spokeswoman) asked me.. How am I going to 避孕 (prevent myself from preggy again) after my first baby? I was dumb, shocked. dont know what to say. Same idea.. We never plan enuff, second baby shdnt come so fast. She ask me to eat medicine or ask doc tie, if need to release then release. I was like.. What the xxxx. She did not even ask me if I want to do any prevention, she just ask me which way I will b doing?
My hubby so pissed . Think he will talk to his parents soon. He says he is very upset y the dad keep wanting to control us. He really think we r so stupid that we never do any planning kind? So dont talk about being excited n buying things for this baby, they r talking about asking us dont #2 so soon.. Maybe they really dont appreciate us trying to make them grandparents so soon.. To them, we dont affect their lives is more impt than anything else..
I'm just a bit pissed y got such in law.. Not really sad . They just treasure their own lives more than anything else. We dont disturb their trips, my mother in law no need cook for me, is more critical. Boo boo boo~
Focus focus focus!!! Focus on baby's cutie smile.. Everything else doesn't matter!!
are you n your in laws very young? you all living together? i really wonder why r your in laws so against you getting preggers. or maybe they r just not very prepared themselves. maybe they are nervous that they r going to become grandparents. maybe they were not prepared to be in laws in the first place. maybe cos your Hubby is the only son... is it?6