I'm currently with my no. 2 and a 17 months old dear daughter. I still carry her around. There was once I stopped carrying her temp. because I was spotting a little, probably due to not enough rest as she was recovering from cold and I did not get enough sleep during that time.
My beautician had given me a light massage on the back once, no problems so far.
They are probably worried about you and your no. 2, especially during the first trimester. They are just anxious about you. Why not just ask your gynae if it's ok to do all these things with your husband present as well to allay their fears?