This is a discussion on How to train your child to sleep by himself? within the Toddlers and Preschoolers (1-5 years old) forum, part of the Singapore Kiasu Parents Forum category; My 3 year old son has been sleeping with us since birth. Now I am expecting with my 2nd child. ...
My 3 year old son has been sleeping with us since birth. Now I am expecting with my 2nd child. I hope to train my boy to sleep in his own room. I know it is not easy to make this transition, hence, decided to start early. My 2nd child will be arriving next year March. I still have about 7 to 8 months to train my boy. Mummies who have successfully trained your child to sleep in his/her own room..pls share your experiences.
Hi Selina, you can try decorating your boy's room with his favourite cartoon characters. Make the room as fun as possible. This will encourage him to like his new bedroom.
Another way will be giving him lots of encouragement and priases. Tell him he will be kor kor soon. He is a big boy now. Must learn to sleep by himself.
There are no hard and fast rules in training your child to be independent. You have to go slow and be really patient. Dont give up after few unsucessful attempts. He has been sleeping with you for 3 years..you cant expect him to sleep on his own in 3 days time ...
Hi selina, I totally understand what you are going through. I had a hard time to train my first boy to sleep in his own room. He will cry in the middle of the nite and refused to sleep in his own room. I did not do anything special...as time went by..he slowly got used to it.
It was much easier for my 2nd kid as he had his elder brother for company. I think it would be much easier if we had trained our child to sleep alone when he/she is still an infant. Maybe you can do that for your 2nd child ..hehe
watever the ways or methods you use, be sure to be firm with yr son. that is, if you tuck him into his bed in his room, and awhile later he comes sneaking into your bedroom n climbing up your bed, have to bring him back to his room and tuck him to bed. Regardless of the number of times you are doing it. Be firm n persistent, and your son will sleep on his own one day.
so do you close the door when you leave the room? or leave a gap? if leave gap, the child will come out right? if you close the door shut, the child will think she's being abandoned right???
hmm.. i have not train my boy to sleep alone in his room. so i am not sure but then i think just leave the door ajar, in case they cry then you can hear.
My annoying boss's wife told me to let my daugter cries to sleep and ignore her totally. Until one final day, when your baby realise its not gg to help then they will eventually sleep on their own. I really can;t bear to do that.. Any mummies do that? Does it really help??
I've always leave the room door close completely as we usually turn on the a/c in the 1st hour of their sleep, just to sooth and help them to dreamland faster.
and I'm still using the baby monitor just to have a peace of mind ( not that I'm a light sleeper).
my dds are so used to having the door closed and blinds drawn everynight. so even on some nights when the weather is breezy and i left the door ajar, blinds half drawn, dd1 will request to have them close!!
so you see, either way: door ajar or close, to me- really makes no difference . cos both of my dds are tall enough to open the door by themselves when they are awake!!
I've had my dds sleeping on their own since they were slightly over 6months old. then, I was still bfg them and they were still wake for night feeding constantly. so I would shuttled between 2bedrooms...is tiring tho but just have to be consistent!
try not to worry too much...mayb you can try to take the 1st step 1st , be it decorating his room, talk to him about being a big boy/brother soon, tell him the fun of having his own n unique space etc....
when we 1st started, we used to take turn to tug dear daughter in and stayed in the room till she fell asleep. and we often make it a point to praise her the next morning and kept reminding her that we are just there for the time being and soon will return to our own room. then, we progressed into just staying in for a few minutes to bedtime story-prayer-hug and kiss goodnight and left the room. make it a routine and most importantly ( in my opinion ) is to 'talk, talk, talk' to him, so he knows what to expect next.
you may also like to start by letting him take his daytime nap in his room 1st ( that is if he still takes afternoon nap ) then praise him for his effort and slowly getting him use to sleeping his room in the night too!!
just my 2c.....
Now i have bought for them the dbl-decker bed (from Ikea) and they are used to it oredi.
My 3rd one still sleeps with me...
Like the others said, get him to decorate the room with you with his favourite character, let him choose a big boy bed and explain to him why he needs to sleep in his own room now. This is help him understand it's not bcos of the new baby but rather he's big enough to do so. You can start by leaving a small night light or keep the door ajar. baby monitor will be good and let him know you'll be able to respond to him. It will take a while but it's better long term, if not you'll be stuck with 2 kids in your bed for a long time!!
Yup i just set up my son's rm a week ago with a children bed.
Now he sleeps on his own bed, but before he dozes off i will sleep on a mattress on the floor. At least now, he dont insist to sleep beside mi coz his bed is single sz too small for mi btw he is coming to 5yo
I think i am a very 'lucky xin' mum...I let my girl sleep at her won room since she is an infant, and she is 20mths...she is able to sleep on her own after saying nite nite to me every night
was thinking of training my 3 yo to sleep on his own
whens the best time to do that?
thought of making him more independent and brave...
but scared he wake up middle of the night and "roams" around without me knowing....
but he says he is afraid of the dark....will have monsters....
is it too early? what do you all think??
no one reply my thread .....
support me a bit ....
how? what do you all think???
Is ok, i support you..
I think is still quite young for them to sleep alone, especially if they are not that daring, even till now my eldest daughter 8 yrs old still dont't dare to sleep alone..
Maybe wait till your dear son is about Pri 1 than you try asking him whether he wanna try sleep alone a not..
thank you ms catty...
i told him he has to learn to be big boy liaoz....kekeke...told him i will start when he is 4yo~
just worried if he will open the door and go outside on his own....
Eh.. darling.. I didn't @@ tis thread, so never reply you ..
Hmm.. If given a choice (too lazy to clear up the room for her ), I would have let dear daughter get her own room earlier. Haha.
But now, she is sleeping by herself oredi. Didn't come in my room in the middle of the nite anymore. She got used to sleeping in her own room by herself already. Of coz initially, she couldn't get used to it coz all along she sleep with us until dear son was born mah.. LOL.
But after perservering for like 1-2wks, sleeping on her own.. She is fine now.. Heh. But you must not be softhearted . Seriously. Coz it takes time for your dear son to get totally used to it after 3yrs of sleepin with you all. Maybe I'm not a good mummy.. LOL.
Btw, if your dear son is scared of dark, how he dare to roam around the house in the middle of the nite ? LOL. Funny you..
I'm currently still planning to let dear son sleep by himself at age of 6mths.. Heh.
scared of dark will not roam outside izzit>?
just scared ....scared he go outside and climb the windows....phobia!
wah, 6 months! you mean sleep with dear daughter issit?
Erm.. if scared of dark, outside also dark mah... Won't it be safer (no monsters) if he keep himself on the bed with blankie rather that roam outside? Logical rite? LOL.
Currently sleepin with dear son.. thought of putting him alone by 6mths...
Cancan, i think that you can start encouraging your son to sleep on his own. There isn't any specific age limit. If you look at the angmohs, even at infant years, their bbies are place in a cot in a different room. Of course with the help of baby monitors to hear bbies cries.
Not saying that we should be like angmoh but as parents, if you strongly feel that it is about time that your child should learn to sleep on their own, then we should provide ways/methods to ease the kids in order to make them comfortable/safe in their own room.
Consider these practical ideas:
- get interesting night lamps, like those from IKEA. Get him to choose his fav.
- Get him to choose his bed cover, you know, those cartoon motifs.
- Get him to choose bed (that is, if you've not purchase one yet)
- Get him involve in decorating his own room.
- Get him Pjs that have cartoon motifs. Cook up some stories on why he gets to wear those special Pjs....ya know, just to make him feel special.
Basically, get him to CHOOSE, to make him feel involve in the whole process.
If you are worried about the windows, lock the grille and hide things which you feel are not safe away from his reach. If you have baby monitor, just place it near his bed. Tell him that he can call you from there should he need anything.
Of course, the first few trials can be tiring, won't be rosy immediately. Chances are, he may come to you several times in the night and you have to walk him back to the room. But hey, he has to start somewhere, sometime.
All my kids started to be on their own at 2 years of age. My last one just started almost 6 mths back.
PHEW....that was lengthy! But i am glad to share it.
just read your thread.. Actually I am thinking to let my 3mths old girl to sleep in our own room now... I have similar concern with you... after reading those replied to yr thread.. I agree with them... somewhere we have to start.. I guess it's easier to start earlier... I bought a baby monitor with lcd screen.. at least i can see when is she doing if i hear some fuuny sound...
Last edited by CanCanMum; 18-02-2009 at 11:03 AM. Reason: Similar threads