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We are trying to concieve-ing!

This is a discussion on We are trying to concieve-ing! within the Trying To Conceive forum, part of the You and Your Family category; I just heard this sad story. One of my ex-colleagues just have birth to a still born. The baby wasnt ...

  1. #8976
    Imperial Concubine littlej's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    I just heard this sad story.

    One of my ex-colleagues just have birth to a still born. The baby wasnt doing very well at 6th month and it was one of those choices whereby staying inside her or opting to take the baby out equated to similar chances of survival of the baby. By faith (she is very religious) she decided to carry to full term. I admire her courage, her tenacity, her resilience and her faith. Life is so unpredictable, we should really count our blessings and take each moment as it comes. And every woman is strong.

    When i told my hubby this story, he looked at me sadly and told me that he now hopes i can understand why he doesnt wanna get any baby stuff until august. it is not that he dont't wanna buy any baby stuff now, it is just that he would rather be cautious than disappointed. and he would rather waste the additional hundred of dollars (cannot capitalize on sales / second hand / overseas purchases).... Some may think my hubby so pessimistic but I guess for me, I can understand where he is coming from too - he is just so scared something may happen to the one he loves so dearly that he would rather err on the side of caution. It took this story for me to see things from my hubby's pov - I used to think he didnt care and rather play golf than go baby shopping...

  2. #8977
    Imperial Concubine littlej's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Btw what I am trying to say is I can now see from my husband's perspective on why he doesn't wanna get anything now and that he does love this lil' muffin whilst he is not showing any excitement outwardly. So in a way, reinforcing that men do show love and care and concern differently from women =)

    (Please dont't get me wrong that all mummies should get stuff later too! I dont't mean it this way!!)

  3. #8978
    Worthy Lady lishan0613's Avatar
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    i guess we all fall in the same category...i can never never go hungry. if i know hub will be late, i will definately grab something to munch on. lol

    littlej: your hub so funny eh...his kkj inside you...i literally LOL when i see that line.
    i was trained at to hand wash my own lingerie , so till now i also cannot accept his underwear to mix with mine, coz i tink his dirtier. yeeee!! haha!

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    Worthy Consort Dragontail's Avatar
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    Littlej, I read your post with a heavy heart. First thing first, I totally agree that women are a strong creature. I am amazed how SHE can rise to the occasion in the most unimaginable situation. That, I am proud to be a woman.

    I know of someone who had to be induced to give birth to her still born at 6-7months. The baby was strangled in her own umbilical cord. I broke down while hearing this. I can only imagine how and what the mommy had to go through and endure

    I hope your ex colleague trusts that time will heal. It must be so so hard...

    Good to hear that your dearie took this chance to open up to you. True...men dont really talk openly about such things. I dont think they have such forum threads where men come together to share such things. Not like we ladies do!

    His concerns are surely understandable. Give him a good hug! And just look forward to the baby shopping 3months from now!!

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    Worthy Consort Dragontail's Avatar
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    Lishan, lol that's why I dont understand why old mothers make daughters hand wash their panties but dont make boys do that. It's so unfair. Men's deh kor are filthy too, if not worse. I cannot accept the stigma of this .

  6. #8981
    Imperial Concubine littlej's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Geez. life is unpredictable. I suspect it could be the same case for my ex-colleague but we didnt ask. anyway, she seems ok now so she just told us her story and the reason for her opening up was she wanted us to know how much more she appreciates life and her #1 and how she is further strengthened by her faith. And also explaining why she didnt keep in contact for the past 6 mths. Definitely, what doesn't break you makes you stronger.

    She just msged us to see it as a strong of strength and faith and not a story of sadness... So that's how I am viewing it now.

  7. #8982
    Imperial Concubine littlej's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Btw. Anyone know of any good infant care around Amk / yio Chu kang / Thomson area? I am considering infant care as an option for my lil' muffin.

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    Worthy Lady wantonmee's Avatar
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    Hubby is living with my parents now and everything (all 4 of our clothes) just get washed together! Baby clothes get a special wash on its own though. Whats with the bad luck stuff? Zzz.

    AF is supposed to come this weekend and im so not looking forward to it! I hope it doesnt.

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    Imperial Concubine Missy10's Avatar
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    I received a weird msg from a ben81

  10. #8985
    Worthy Lady wantonmee's Avatar
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    My boy has been in infant care since 4mth old after my maternity leave ended. I must aay his development is really different from others ive seen who dont attend school. They learn fast at holding their bottles, eating, walking and everything else. More importantly, they are not afraid of strangers. I guess the cknstant interaction with teachers and fellow playmates are a boost as well. Of course, the downside is the hugher risk of illness. But I believe it makes them stronger overall.

  11. #8986
    Worthy Consort Dragontail's Avatar
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    As I'm still not over the woman's deh kor stigma, I wanna add on that my hubby's granny is against hanging the panties over our head level. She ever said me because I did that. She didnt want her precious grandson to happen to walk under my panties. Hello? They are washed and smelling clean and soft and floral (Softlan) so why cant walk under? Not as if some panties are going to drip some CM on anyone's crown.

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    Worthy Lady lishan0613's Avatar
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    dragon: ya man...i totally agree with you. old ppl really got all these funny funny rules.
    i give you a another good example....my mother in law barred me from wearing black!
    she say it's bad luck and it's for me and my hubby's own good for not wearing black....what can i say. >.<

  13. #8988
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    Quote Originally Posted by littlej:792264
    Btw what I am trying to say is I can now see from my husband's perspective on why he doesn't wanna get anything now and that he does love this lil' muffin whilst he is not showing any excitement outwardly. So in a way, reinforcing that men do show love and care and concern differently from women =)

    (Please dont't get me wrong that all mummies should get stuff later too! I dont't mean it this way!!)
    Actually can understand where is your husband is coming from..I also havent buy any stuff also..if you are interested, there is baby expo and parenthood fair at singapore expo on 2 - 4 aug and 30 aug to 1 sep respectively. .

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    Consort-in-Ordinary quincy1986's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    my friend's family has this tradition of not buying baby items until baby is almost due. if we want to sent her gifts, we cannot send to her house and cannot give to her personally.

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    Littlej ..maybe you are right..its accumulated frustration. My little girl knew I was angry with her also (smarter than dad!) And told me she want me to be happy but she doesn't know how....she just melt my heart.

    And I agree that dont buy baby stuff too early until maybe 2nd trimester or later....wsit until stable stable then buy. Having a baby in tummy is so delicate and you cant control what's going on inside except to pray over it.

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    Consort-in-Ordinary quincy1986's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    littlej: dont think of infant care yet. headache about it later

  17. #8992
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    good morn ladies!

    missy10 - did you & hubby enjoy the sweet treat that you baked last night? remember to grab a bite first tonight if your hubby is late & give him cutoff time to inform you.

    littlej - I have heard of a story similar. happened to a friend's relative. And I think it was almost full term & the baby was strangled by own umbilical cord so gave birth to a still born. This type of situation I always thought can save? if baby's movements are dropping near full term, can the mom choose to induce earlier? it is still possible to save the baby right?

  18. #8993
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    happilymarried- i guess the mom has to be real sensitive to baby's movement and see gynae immediately if the baby has lesser movements or no movements. Only if detect early then can save the baby. got one relative..the mom quite sensitive to movement and thank god she detected the baby not moving and quickly see gynae. end up emergency c-sect coz the umbilical cord around the neck ...and that saved the baby.

    hah, when i was preg..i will sayang the tummy and ask baby dont anyhow play with the cord ....

    really quite upsetting to have stillborn when almost full term..wonder how the parents take it.

  19. #8994
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    poohy - I see.. thanks for sharing. im not there yet but I hope to get there someday (bfp, carry to full term & carry my healthy baby in my arms). I think I will be a super paranoid mom when pregnant cos so many unpredictable things can happen.

    to all the ladies pregnant now... baby must move gently and more often. and be guai guai... no playing with the cord.

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    Imperial Concubine Missy10's Avatar
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    Happilymarried, hubby only back 11pm and i bought him a big pack of cai fan(huge quantity when closing) and he even bought mac nuggets for me..... so only ate abit of the cake, anyway will be his breakfast n snack today.... frankly, im not a bread/cake person, so i bake he eat......

    One of my bff's baby scan show her baby was holding the cord towards the mouth, like biting
    So she very sensitive
    Nearer to edd, she realises her baby not active, rush to Thomson Medical Center.... dr says umbilical cord around neck 2 rounds and baby still holding onto it(luckily not tight), baby very notti,

    I had a sweet vivid dream, i was bathing my newborn baby clumsily...... hahaha then told hubby the moment i woke, 1st question boy or gal..... i say i only concentrate to bath the baby never see the private part... hahahaha
    Last edited by Missy10; 28-05-2013 at 09:11 AM.

  21. #8996
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    missy10-hahahahaha....your hubby very cute . you 2 funny...haha. how many months now?

    by way,anyone experience itchy boobs?

  22. #8997
    Imperial Concubine Missy10's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by poohy:792320
    missy10-hahahahaha....your hubby very cute . you 2 funny...haha. how many months now?

    by way,anyone experience itchy boobs?
    Based on LMP is 2 more days to week 6.....

    apply thin layer of moisturizer or bio-oil

  23. #8998
    Worthy Consort Dragontail's Avatar
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Ya… I think it’s all about timing and reading your baby’s movement. Oh god! Pregnancy is so tense!! Poohy, I’m so happy to hear that your friend was able to save her baby.

    My temp dipped today at 6dpo. As I’m a BBT stalker of my own, I’m going to tell my hubby dont’t pin too much hope this month .

    Littlej, next block to mine, there’s a child care centre + infant care (located at the block’s void deck). Personally I do not know any mothers who put their kids there for any reviews. But my mother in law told me the owner of the place is a very caring and responsible person (I didn’t ask how she knows). She also owns another centre which I dont’t know where. Ok I do not know at this point what to look out for in infant care (fortunately I guess I dont’t need one because if I have a baby, he/she will be taken care by my aunt-in-law). However, when I walk past the centre, I hear how the staff talk to the kids or their parents. Quite ok. Recently they have renovated the centre too. Therefore it looks newer and better, though the place aint big. I also see the staff regularly cleans up the place during some weekend. For the infant care portion, it’s more tucked at another corner so I cant really peep into it.

    Having said that, and I dont’t want to offend anyone I hope, there are a few tiong ladies working there and I dont’t think (I may be wrong) they speak English. Again, this is the child care side. Infant part seems pretty quiet (I guess that’s naturally so since infants dont’t play).

  24. #8999
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Sigh..go toilet and see red. today only 12dpiui.....gonna restart cycle again.haizz

  25. #9000
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    poohy - dont feel sad and dont give up! take comfort in your daughter! you have a very sweet little girl right? I have done many iuis (around 6) & all didnt work for me... i think my egg shell too hard & his heads r just lousy! but I wont give up! you must try to keep yourself happy during 2ww... last time I used to be so mad with hubby when he doesnt do things my way, but now.. I find a way to laugh it off & just take it easy..

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