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We are trying to concieve-ing!

This is a discussion on We are trying to concieve-ing! within the Trying To Conceive forum, part of the You and Your Family category; dragontail - big hugs to you babe. actually many of us r in the same boat.. I can totally relate ...

  1. #12326
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    dragontail - big hugs to you babe. actually many of us r in the same boat.. I can totally relate to you on the "confined to the bedroom" "whenever hubby says everyone loves you blah blah". it is just so different.. it seems most of us live with in laws.. except I think I m the dumbest among all you ladies. why I say that? cuz... sigh.. I keep my story short. lots of regret here. I lived for 10 months with my in laws in their house cuz ours wasnt ready (ok thankful for that).. 10months.. I had 50% of my clothes in boxes stacked in the balcony. 50% of all my other barangs were also stacked away.. it was only just around 10months but I can understand the cramped feeling..n no proper space to walk around braless under my tee (maybe for me only) n I cant fart burp n scream n yell from living room or kitchen.. or even baby talk to my eggies back then..

    then our place was ready!!! imagine the freedom n pure joy I felt.. but that joy was shortlived. hubby had nonsense plans to go abroad to work. he would like me to follow him (at that time, I was uncertain cuz how can we take our trying to concieve abroad when we just found out we had problems). so I was cautious. I discussed with hubby a zillion times over his package n whether he really wanted to postpone our trying to concieve. somehow in the discussion.. I dont know how it became this result. they came to live in our house supposedly to take care of it cuz its newer. n rent theirs out. OMG. my hell began.... hubby didnt take the package. they moved in. I had to continue my trying to concieve under their scrutiny day in day out. there were so many times I locked myself in my master bedroom n cried so hard. how come I m back to square 1??? its been 1plus yr..... I really want my house back to myself. see how dumb I m?? I still dont really recall agreeing to living tog. take care of house for us means we go they come. we stay they dont come. my equation not balanced here ... sigh.

    anyway dragontail hang in there! your apartment will be ready in.. less than 2 yrs time? time will fly & it will be earlier than you think! speak to hubby & seek some comfort from him? I always remind hubby that he gotta appreciate me for taking his parents in..

  2. #12327
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    dragontail - the prata place you eating at... is it somewhere near jalan kayu or something? I used to eat there when I go for tuition in my jc days... hmmm suddenly miss prata.. heh..

    hope you can feel better soon ok? cry once or twice.. then tomorrow will be a brand new day with brand new hope! I wish your flat to be the first to collect keys!!


    quincy - wahaha you r so funny! the only tefals I know are pans n boilers.. me hate irons!!

  3. #12328
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    wontonmee - good for you!! egg mayo, ham sandwich.. sounds healthy! beanie approved.. haha.. I tried getting my hubby to eat fruits for dinner.. gosh I had to push him to sit down at the dining table n 'forced' him to munch on the bite sized fruits.... my man is like an overgrown baby....

  4. #12329
    Worthy Lady wantonmee's Avatar
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    superwoman: very simple! hard boil eggs (I used 3 for two person portion) and then chop them up to small bits. mix in abit of mayo and a tinge of salt and viola! but I added jap cucumber also chopped to small bits) for some crunchiness! normally I would spread on bread then clingwrap put in fridge to chill so its ready to eat in the morning but realise the bread gets soggy from the mayo. so know I just leave it in a bowl/contajner to chill then spread on bread in the morning to eat straight away

    happilymarried: will they move out after you give birth? lets say.. after confinement? turn one room into nursery first. or you'll be needing their help to look after baby?

    luckily my parents are independent type. both are still working and more havoc than me! my mum and dad drinks like 2-3 times a week and is not with each other one uh! else, it'll be mj for my mum at home (so fridays/saturdays we usually take turns) but now im confined cant go drinking already so im always home on weekends -_-" so they wont be moving in with us thankfully. besides my mum's house is already fully paid for. she just said to make sure theres a guest room so she can stay over and see her grandson as and when.
    Last edited by wantonmee; 14-07-2013 at 10:52 PM.

  5. #12330
    Worthy Lady wantonmee's Avatar
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    same! mum gave me a bunch of grapes earlier and I just popped them into hubby's mouth. he wont pluck and eat on his own; but he will open his mouth if fed. ha!

  6. #12331
    Imperial Concubine rav3naers's Avatar
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    Dragontail: Big hugs to you! dont't try to hold it in. Have a good swim or even cry. Tears do help sometimes. Let your hubby know that you need his company. A little snuggle & hug does wonders. Just go grab him in a bear hug & dont't let go. I always do that when I am feel neglected. Understand the feeling of being stuck with no 'freedom'. Before I got married, hubby was adamant in getting our own place before that. Now I can't even imagine living with my parents again even though I love them to bits.

  7. #12332
    Imperial Concubine littlej's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Hello Dragontail - i wouldn't say I know you very well but from what I know... It seems like today is just one of "those" days... "Those" days in terms of why can't he be more caring, more understanding, wtf is going in his mind and "those" days in terms of I wish I have him with me right now cuz i feel so lonely and all by myself =(

    I hope the silence so far means you have had a good cry and asleep and/or you are now with your hubby getting a good hug and kiss and hmm - something exciting too? =)

    tomorrow is a brand new day. The sun will shine tomorrow.

    Only 2 more months and he will be done with exams - for good right? So just need to 忍. 忍无可忍 - talk to us. I dont think your hubby is the kind who will intentionally leave you alone - he probably doesnt know what you are thinking / going through.

    as for housing - hmm... I Would say, i am sure there was a reason why you agreed to move with the in laws instead of continuing with your tenancy and if you could convince yourself then, Right now - you just have to think back to that time and know that the decision you made is right. *hugs*

    I am pretty sure there were obstacles in the past that you conquered to get the results - be it money, career, relationships, that bag or shoes or 4d etc. just that we tend to remember the good things and not the bad so it seems like we had everything then why can't we have everything now.

    Anyway you ain't lonely cuz you have us!!! Hahaha we should have met in orchard and we could have had dinner and teh alia! I also had an all by meself day - church, lunch, town, pedicure, supermarket, dinner. (in fact - my old man is still out after one whole day of golf so hahaha I have not't even seen him the entire day). Sometimes I think when others see me - they are probably thinking "this lady must be a single mum - she is attending church alone, having lunch alone, looking at cots and baby stuff alone, supermarketing alone, dinner alone..."

    For me - There are those times when I experience overwhelming bouts of loneliness - a good cry... And a good sleep... And I wake up feeling better.

  8. #12333
    Worthy Consort Dragontail's Avatar
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    I read all your thoughts and sharing and advices. I'm very touched. I got teared while reading them and some droplets fell into my teh-halia !

    A big thank you to you all. I was alone at the prata place but not exactly alone

    I wanted to stay at the prata place till at least midnight. Like, you know, make the hubby worry and feel bad. Hng. But 1045pm I already could see stars. So guai guai come home. 漏气 aka lao-kui.

    Came home and first thing hubby came and hugged and kissed me. Nice. Actually when I was out, he already messaged me "where are you" and "coming home soon?" and "going to rain". I left home without telling him. Upset already how to talk to him then. In fact, he knew I was unhappy . I was finishing my soup just now then he came and asked me "hows your dinner?". Too late, mister. I replied him "now then you feel like asking me?". True what...for 20mins I sat alone in the kitchen, and he was watching comedy heeheehaahaa away. He knew then he asked too late. After that what happened was kind of funny, now that I think back. He quickly acted busy (still dare to continue watching tv meh??!!). Went to take plastic bag to the room to refill the trashbin (the bin was without plastic bag but with some rubbish in it. Our habit is we must have a plastic bag so that it's easier to throw when full. And he knows I nag when I see rubbish in the bin without bag). After that he came back to the kitchen to fill up the kettle to boil. Again, I ever said to him dont leave such little chore to your parents. When you see the kettle empty, please help to boil fresh water. Normally he really listen from this ear come out from the other ear. But tonight he's very auto mode. Kaka.

    wantonmee, thanks for sharing. Yes I'm waiting for our place to be ready in 2years time (just like you!). Not too long not too short. Actually before we moved in, my inlaws did ask my hubby if we like to take over the master bedroom. I think that's a very big sacrifice. I am thankful for their genuine offer. But of course we said no. My mother in law is way much a hands-on person in the house, compared to my mom. My mom is very qin-cai in bringing all her children up. As such, I feel more "worse" why I cant be really very close with my inlaws (I say this many times I know... they are the best inlaws one can ever have). I guess I just came from very different upbringing. I think ultimately it's still comforting to see that our husbands are being filial to their parents. As for your mother in law's habits, something beyond us... I'm sure you and your hubby have found a peaceful way of handling this Btw, is it your nearby wantonmee's stall that is so yummy that it inspired your nickname here?

    Quincy, thank you thank you. You see, my hubby is the only son. I feel it's still right that one day, we have to take care of his old folks. But then, how this is going to work out we'll see when the time comes. Aiya, anything can happen tomorrow. Plans will always meet surprises along the way.

    Shez, aiyo you naughty. Your message made me drank teh with tears. Ya... I think tonight is THE night for me. Luckily you and hubby worked things out in the end! Thank you for the jiayous.... it means a lot to me when I receive it too

    Missy10, yes my neck waits long long already! I know it will come soon if I stop counting. Er... I more suaku. I've never done the dong-lui laundry before. How does it feel? I mean I always see in angmoh shows strangers meet and fall in love while waiting for their laundry to be spun. Quite romantic l.e. (but not the Mr Bean version).

    Superwoman, thanks! Yes I will talk to my hubby later. At least about what's bothering me tonight. Before I moved in, I did ask hubby if we should rent a place of our own. And it seems like it will never be an option. So case closed for that thought. But I feel why I'm thinking so much tonight is because I just felt neglected for a bit! If he would have at least came and accompanied me during my dinner just now, then it would have been world peace -_-.

    Littlehammie, huggy back! Hee O coming will be emo? I thought AF coming then more emo. Haha I think I must agree with you that when our house is coming, my man will be the one to be emo. Because no more mummy TLC treatment.

    Happilymarried, hearing your story, you deserve a big hug from me too! So your inlaw's place is now officially rented out isit? Ok, my mother in law did tell my hubby "leave a room for us" when we decided to purchase our own house. Of course we said yes. But honestly I work out the math.... our new place is darn small (as with most new flats). Kitchen small, hall small, balcony small. Bedrooms even more small. There will be 3 bedrooms. 1 for me/hubby (can only put bed and two tiny bedside tables that's all. I mean the wardrobe cabinet is already built in), one for study cum my vanity area room, and one more will be baby room cum guest room. I mean depends how long we will stay there... the last room may just be our kid's room. How to accomodate two more people? Ok ... my gf told me "I tell you, once they see your new house, they wont want to stay with you". Because their current place is so much roomy and more bedrooms. I think they will feel very crampy living with us at new place. Oh, the prata place is along upp thomson. Near the Han's. Hee tomorrow ask hubby to buy prata for you!

    Rav, huggies too! LOL I so get what you mean. I love my mom and I think I should do my part as a daughter to my father (though I still cant really forget) but I think I just need 2 weeks to feel suicidal if I stay with them again. And thanks, I am feeling better

    littlej, hee I think the storm has passed. Actually luckily he didnt go back to watching the tv after asking me "hows my dinner" or else it will sure be a heavy storm. Ha! We might have bumped into each other earlier! Did see few preggie ladies. But none alone. So was it a fruitful shopping day for baby stuff today? I am sure tomorrow is better day

    Such long post. Thanks 大家 for listening to my whining. Muakies! Good night.

  9. #12334
    Imperial Concubine Missy10's Avatar
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    Morning everyone!!!

    Early Monday morning..... why am i so early?? Hahaha... excited for my oscar test later....

    Dragontail - glad that you are fine... and your realised his mistake.... loved that moment when men realised their mistake and hug n kiss you, you feel like queen that moment....

    As for the coin laundry, my man was resistant in the first place, saying why cant we wash ourselves using our 6-mths old front load machine, but i was explaining, i cant wash and dry the king size bedsheet, mattress protector altogether myself... so y not give it a try....

    Who knows, he says we will go wash once a months ( we only change king bedsheets every 3 weeks), as my bedroom rules, no bath cannot sleep on bed....
    Last edited by Missy10; 15-07-2013 at 08:19 AM.

  10. #12335
    Imperial Concubine rav3naers's Avatar
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    Morning Dearies!

    Yay! Dragontail, happy that you r feeling better! New day new week!

  11. #12336
    Consort-in-Ordinary quincy1986's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    morning !!!
    brand new day !
    one thing i like about work is we can slog the day and just like that 1 day has passed ^^

    littlehamster: i bought it for the glide too.

    happilymarried: i dislike the previous one my mother in law had. it is the cheapest form of P one and had current leakage.

    hubby says i cannot use the tefal anymore. he say should get a new one

  12. #12337
    Imperial Concubine happilymarried's Avatar
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    quincy - maybe try the tefal on another electric point? sometimes may not be the device.. believe tefal is quite good quality.


    dragontail - glad your hubby knew something was wrong! he's actually very sensitive.. mine would be the happy go lucky silly dude always thinking everything is A okie..


    lousy asleep again last night... couldn't fall asleep until 3plus am... what if doc gives me more bad news later... how to bear it?? women r tough but not made of steel... there will be a breaking point.. I m so worried n paranoid but I dont want to ruin hubby's day...

  13. #12338
    Consort-in-Ordinary quincy1986's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    happilymarried: my gosh... how could you be more negative? i know it is easier said than done.

    with that i wanna share with you my story. last week was on a super crowded train. i thought this time the cabin's gonna filled with many "colourful" people. guess what? i was squeezing up to a handsome chap. i wish i could pretend faint and lean against him. sigh...

  14. #12339
    Worthy Lady wantonmee's Avatar
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    dragontail, good to hear your house is also coming in two years! totally something to look forward to. well i hope your inlaws will be zidong enough to give you two some er ren shi jie. and yup we have found a peaceful way of handling the situation aka dont even talk about it! i dont want to seem like im always putting down his mum. although they arent close, but still he's her son - and only son. anyway it's just 3hours max a week that i see her so i'll just keep quiet hehe.

    happilymarried: think positive please! early morning cannot dampen yours, baby's and everyone's mood ! monday blues -_- just reached office.

  15. #12340
    Imperial Concubine rav3naers's Avatar
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    Happilymarried: Aiyoh...please dont think of the worst...hugs. updates ok?

  16. #12341
    Imperial Concubine rav3naers's Avatar
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    Dragontail: ooo..new place coming...exciting! I still remembered being bz with the house reno & the nitty gritty. Very fun! I agree 3 rooms isn't enough. Masterbed room, study room & baby room all used up. Cannot imagine how my dad & his 10 siblings plus my grands squeeze into a 3 room flat in the past O_o human tetris. Hahahaha

  17. #12342
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Morning! Dragontail, glad you are feeling better!!!

    Rav, 3 bedrooms not enuf? Try living in my place! A 5rm flat that originally came with 4 bedrooms, prev owner removed 1 so that the living room is bigger, hubby and I combined a second bedroom with a master so our room is bigger. That means we now have 2 rooms. Hahaha. Our study tables are out in the living room, and d second room is a guest/entertainment room. Hahahaha.

    Happilymarried - twin a will be fine!!!!! So many aunts here are rooting for him/her!

  18. #12343
    Imperial Concubine rav3naers's Avatar
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    Shez: If I can afford it, I want 5 bedrooms! Hahaha. Masterbedroom, boy room, girl room, study room & the stress relieving gaming room! Greedy greedy.

  19. #12344
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    Wah Rav, that's everyone's dream! Plus one room filled with clothes and shoes and bags!!!!

  20. #12345
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    Re: We are trying to concieve-ing!

    dragontail- hugs...not easy to stay with in-laws. I'm quite glad that my hubby didnt intend to stay with his parents 3room flat when we got married. Coz the house is small and no masterbedroom one..only 1 toilet at home. Now i alwas imagine having to stay with them..i think i'll also hide in the room! But things for me changing...hah, we are planning to get a bigger flat/ec and stay with my parents/bro instead! hope things work out fine......

    jia you dragontail!

    Missy10- exciting hoh...share with us your joy later!

  21. #12346
    Imperial Concubine littlehamster's Avatar
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    Fairprice finest selling live Pacific oysters at $2.20 each... size around 5-6cm, shells quite white. Worth? Will the counter help to shukle them? Or shld I go sengsiong n buy? Ss sells bigger ones n more ex ..

  22. #12347
    Imperial Concubine littlehamster's Avatar
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    Missy10, update us Later! Excited for you too (^3^)

  23. #12348
    Consort-in-Ordinary quincy1986's Avatar
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    We are trying to concieve-ing!

    littlehamster: i wish i can answer you. but sigh my man anti oyster.

    i also hide inside my room. my hubby laid down the condition that i should love his family like my own. and i did! back in my maiden home i also hide in my room! so i think i did a very good job to my hubby.

    initially my hubby wasnt convinced. but my mother told him, "my daughter very quiet. and she always hide inside her room when she is home. if not she go out also never tell me where she go."

  24. #12349
    Imperial Concubine Missy10's Avatar
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    Scan done.....

    Hubby so happy cos baby got the same sleeping pose as him,

    baby was aalewp when we starts the scan so it was fast... then sonographer starts to show me the arms, limbs, cord, listen heartbeat.....
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Click image for larger version. 

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    littlehamster likes this.

  25. #12350
    Imperial Concubine rav3naers's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Missy10:808219
    Scan done.....

    Hubby so happy cos baby got the same sleeping pose as him,

    baby was aalewp when we starts the scan so it was fast... then sonographer starts to show me the arms, limbs, cord, listen heartbeat.....
    Heehee...looks like baby doing a bro fist..yoz!

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