This is a discussion on Advices on BF vs Formula within the Breastfeeding Mothers Support Group forum, part of the MummySG Special Group category; During the first few days, they (relatives) kept asking me about my breast milk, but mine milk flow did not came ...
During the first few days, they (relatives) kept asking me about my breast milk, but mine milk flow did not came so fast.
So, they started asking you, why no milk? it appears to me their tone as a kind of stress. Lots of comments followed.
Slowly, on monday, which is her 4th day, there's engorgement and milk supply starts to come in naturally.
On tuesday, she also had breast milk .
And, she had soiled her diapers like 7 times.
Then, mum started asking me to give up breast milk due to her frequency of diaper changing (poo)
and when im back to work, how is she going to handle
Plus, when her routine is set to frequent feeding (every 2-3hrs) on breast milk, it might be hard for her to change to bottle feeding for a longer time.
As a result, she may demand to be bottle fed on fm 2-3 hours.
Even, my grandma said some things about just giving her fm totally.
ANy mummies facing similar problems? Any mummies on total formula feeding?
I think you should relax and not stress yourself over what you cannot predict will happen. Enjoy the process of bfding and motherhood. The older generation will always have their own opinions so just listen but dont't take it to heart.
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i also super stress and depressed. well, by the time you go to work, feeding will be established.
my 3mth girl now drinks 150ml breast milk, can last 4 hours. poo will slowly cut down cos their tummy grow .
for me, my milk supply low as i dont know how to express. always express only 50ml each time, not enough for my baby.
so i feed FM every alternate meal.
hope this helps
second what snowbear said.. everything will be better soon.. ask your mom n grandma would they rather the baby takes FM n falls sick so very often thn need to bring to see doc, hospitals, and handle a cranky baby? would handling dirty diapers be an easier task?
Thanks for everyone opinion.
I tried telling them, the stool frequency is alright, as told by doc also.
I even told my gynae when she review my stitches, as was pretty stress
She even wanted to speak to my mum, but too bad, she did not follow to hospital.
They just answer me, heart pain to see her keep shitting so watery and so often. never drink breast milk so what, no only you got milk, everyone also got milk, we never give, you all also grow up healthily until so big.
They emphasis that fm can sleep longer, more fat.
Right now, just finish diploma, got to find work after confinement to help supplement the income with hubby.
Thats why very hard for me to argue, cus after that is my mom take care.
She dont want me express breast milk and keep also.
They asked me to take the pills to stop the milk/engorge.
Gynae said it's $20 per pill, milk supply will slowly stop.
End up i did not take, go home kena scold.
So, have to suffer from the engorge.
Pump out from right side, got 70ml..
end up throw away.. if i feed her like that day,
they will say me, see so many poo, and etc, making it seem is all my fault to make baby suffer. Then, end up i will cry alone..
feeling so stress..have also say me.. dont have also say me..
I just think it's such a pity for you to stop feeding your child breast milk coz you have the supply. So many mothers out there are desperately trying so hard to have more milk to feed their little ones but can't. If pressure around you is so great to stop bfding, and if it makes you feel better to succumb to the pressure then by all means just stop bfding. Your sanity is more impt. Crying alone often at this pt may lead to post-natal depression...
adeline, our own mummy, very hard / impossible to win the fight one.
if the pressure is just too much, you may want to reconsider.
or grit your teeth and fight your mum. i'm giving a very bad advice here.
i fought with my mum all the way to continue breastfeeding. my mum refused to talk to me for days. you have to be prepared to be very tired out during confinement if you do that. which is no good for you in the long run.
my mum finally caved in when i went back to work, my neighbour's daughter in law gave birth to a baby boy 1 month after me. the baby fell sick and kept developing coughs after the 3rd month (baby was on full formula milk). when jeff turned 4 mths, my mum started him on semi solids, he developed a cough. my mum gave him breastmilk for a couple of days and the cough went away. i was very 'lucky', thank Gods jeff turned out ok and my mum now believes breastmilk has antibodies which protects the baby.
my mum was shocked when jeff first passed 'normal' stools after all the meconium stools cleared. she kept insisting he has diarrhea.
my explanation: breastmilk is easily digested. so whatever not needed by the baby is excreted. the stools will be loose and seedy, they are normal. formula milk not so easily digested, hence lesser stools passed out.
i also got my mum to accompany jeff for visits to the pediatrician. my mum asked the doc and nurses directly.
so sorry to read all your posts...
i was against all odds too when i insisted on feeding my boy when he was born in 2006. when he was hungry every 2-3 hours, my mother in law will pass unbearable remarks on me.... own mum also discouraged breastfeeding.
at certain point of time, i slip into depression too, crying for no apparent reasons... those times, i told myself to hang on, relying on the fact that breast milk is the best and i want my son to have the best. My gynae then told me our parents are from the gen who believes FM is the best, so they will impose their own belieft on you.
I have quiet moment too when i went to work in a night clinic twice a week beside my full time job. somehow the clinic session helps me forgot all the unkind faces, and allow me to have some moment away from my child.
I slowly recovers... i hope you are as strong mentally too, dont give up breastfeeding... I never regretted my choice. Now with my 2nd born, i am very happy to give her breast milk exclusively for 6mths. Nobody complains now except my mum as she is concern about my health.
hang on dear.. like what other mommies have said, make them tag along to pediatrician the next time rd.. anything ask doc to tell them direct.. thats how i let my mum ask her queries whn she doesnt believes me.. even if baby not sick, also can just make appt with pediatrician for your mom n ahma to get advised..
dont cry alone k.. many moms wen through this.. we are all here to listen to you..
try to learn to one ear in one ear out .. we are our babies' mommy, we have the rights and responsibilities to protect them.. their gen believes fm is best, and breast milk is only for poor peasants who cannot afford fm.. but we knows the ultimate truth..
anyway, happy mother's day to all breastfeedin mommies out there k~
Thanks everyone for e time to give me some advices.. Really much thanks..
Cus i have not much to tok to.. all my close friends dont understand..
Cus have not reach this stage..
Just hope i can mix in 1 breast milk during her afternoon /midnight feeds..
my mum also discourage me to BF baby when he's born... she said she hope i dont hav any milk supply so dont hav to suffer frm engorsement... she said BF-ing is very tough and she keep feels that FM is much more better than BF...
but i think my mum is much more easier to "psycho"... i assure her that if i really got not enough milk, i'll mixsome FM for baby... i told her to at least let me try...
now she still dont know that a BF-ing baby will poo many times per day, i think after baby born, and she know about this will sure ask me to stop BF-ing again.. LOL..
CHEER UP okay??
come to think of it, i really dont understand y the older generation discourage BF-ing...
Hi all mummies,
I need help here too! just gave birth to my baby boy last week. But my boy is quite impatient and now I have not much milk supply. Did let my boy tried BF but he suck really hard and my nipples are bleeding as a result of the sucking..
Everyone @ home have been supportive in me BF. Even though my milk supply is no enough, I tried very hard to pump out. But it turn out that I can pump out only 30 ml which is not enough for my baby boy at all..
I'm kinda of stress cos my family are very supportive but the confinement lady that I had at home is happen to be my husband's relative from M'sia. She is the ONLY ONE who kp on saying I have no milk supply! I'm kinda of stress. cos I did let my baby boy try but there's not enough supply at all.
Sometimes, I feel really very discouraged.. There are times that I cried in silence.. husband get to know about that and started to worry that I may get post-natal depression sooner or later.
Can any one help in providing details on ways to increase my breast milk??
I had the exact prob as you. My confinement nanny was from breast milk hell and she told me on the first day that i didn't have enuf milk even when i was suffering from engorgement.
I sent her packing after 5 days; she just wanted to make like easier for herself.
Most nannies will tell you to supplement with formula milk because formula milk makes baby very full so baby will sleep longer and not give them so much prob. Also formula bbs dont't pee and poo so often and they dont't have to change the bbs often.
Tell your hubby to talk to the nanny; tell her nicely to shut up or else.
why do you say you dont't have enuf supply? 30 mother in law is very good after latching cos the pumps won't always pump out everything in the breast.
I'm AA cup, but I've managed to bf for 2 months.
If you have sore nipples, maybe you can look up jack newman's video on the net on latching. Or get lactation consultants if you really need to.
keep pumping after feeding baby for about 10 min. best is to kleep putting baby to the breast
Last edited by uddermummy; 15-05-2009 at 03:08 PM.
Thks for your encouragement and info!
husband has got mother in law to tok to the nanny already. I do have the intention to send her back as well. I really cant tahan her bad habits that she brought from M'sia! Cos they are relatives, so I need to bear with that! She quitted her job in M'sia just to help in my confinement, so i cant send her back straight. So our agreement is after this 1 month, we'll send her back loh..
Now, I try pumping loh. hopefully to get more stimulation so that more milk will be produce loh.
dont be down when breast milk is low or what. You can always try to take a supplement call Fenugreek, can get at GNC or Nature's Farm.
Then for comments that ppl make, dont bother . I know its not easy ... Bcoz last time I also very sad , when ppl make comments say dont BF dont this dont that. Until I got angry n told them off straight in the face. I was very rude , i told them wanna make further comments then get out of my house...
Most importantly dont stress yourself out... After 2 babies and another 1 comin out 2nite, I know how to handle them already
For good supply = Eat more fish(Threadfin or Cod Fish is good!) , drink more water, dont stress yourself, have more rest and if have to try to take Fenugreek...
Take care ya?
Thks for your encouragement! And congrats to you in welcoming your 3rd baby tonite! Waiting for your updates ya!
I'll get my husband to help me to buy the Fenugreek from GNC or Nature's Farm. Hopefully I can get more supply cos my boy is very impatient. And wheneva he wail, I'll panick and give him FM 1st..
Congrats! Looking forward to hearing about your new addition!
no worries, I've been thru and am still going thru all these anti-bf crap so i understand how you're feeling.
the first month is really tough, cos you keep worrying that baby is not getting enuf and many ignoramuses, including some pediatricians!, will stress you into thinking you're not a competent mum.
To increase the milk flow, it's really impt to let baby latch often and latch correctly.
as for the ignoramuses who tell you you dont't have enuf milk, tell them that they are not the baby so they are not in a position to speak! Hee. Or if convenient, squirt them with breast milk, which i heard was what someone did. Haha.
Doris Fok, a lact consultant, is really good. I had her twice and she was really understanding and knowledgeable, and her experiences are really encouraging. You can get her no from the breastfeeding mother's support group website if you want to know whether your breast milk is enuf. You can also ask for rosalind lin from thomson medical. She's good too. I feel that only lact consultants, not even docs!, are qualified to tell use whether we have enuf milk or not...
Cheer up, have enuf rest and take care of yourself! If you need to get things off your chest, you can always pm me.
Last edited by uddermummy; 16-05-2009 at 11:18 AM.
you can try telling your mum that your baby will be healthier and easier for her to take care of if on breast milk cos won't fall sick so often.
tell her shit often good, baby won't get constipation on breast milk. watery then easy to get out what, and not that smelly some more.
chances are if baby is fussy with breast milk, baby will also be fussy with fm, cos i think it's more about personality than what baby is eating.
Good luck and cheer up! If all else fails, at least you've tried! Hug hug.
kenxf_03, on top of what mich_liu82 had mentioned, do try to relax, take plenty of fluids..
and check that baby's mouth is WIDE opened, and have a good latch.. bad latch will result in bleeding nipple.. breastfeeding is not supposed to hurt if the latch is right, no matter how hard baby suck..
i wasnt particular about my baby's latch.. in the end, i got crack n bleeding nipple.. gotta grit my teeth each time she latch, and lucky, by 2nd week, its healed..
I am a strong believer that breast milk makes your child smarter. for my first baby i expressed my breast milk when i returned to work and made sure she was on breast milk for at least half a year.
like most of the replies here, i believe in breast milk.. i think breast pumps is the solution to the frequent feeding that babies need as you can pump and store the milk. Think about it, you can pump and store in the fridge. whoever is taking care of your child during your work would only have to warm the breast milk up. and during night-time, your husband would have no excuse to not wake up and feed the baby.
summeradeline, hope your baby poos are more regular now. BFed babies usually poo in the first 1-2 months after each feed or when they expel wind, a little poo comes out because breast milk are easily digestable and also baby's digestive organs are still immatured. By mid 2nd month, it should be better as they would be pooing 1-2 times a day or even not pooing for several days (3-4). But as the months go by, their bowel movements will get more regular.
I still get cracked and bleeding nipples even though it's my 2nd child. It is really important to latch on properly. I was lazy and thought my nipples should be seasoned ..hee.
Whatever the inconveniences, breast milk advantages are definitely worth them so dont't stop, dont't give up and switch to formula. My 1st boy was not on total breast milk and he kinda falls sick every 2wks or so. For my 2nd boy, I'm strictly on total breast milk for him despite all the comments I get to put him on formula (e.g. so that I can rest, baby not getting enough sleep cos breast milk not full, all my child also on formula and they also grow up strong and healthy, etc..).