This is a discussion on Shocking experience within the Singapore Pediatricians and Baby friendly Doctors forum, part of the Growing Up & Parenting category; I am a mummy to a 2.5 yr old boy who was diagnosed with kawasaki disease. For those who are ...
- I am a mummy to a 2.5 yr old boy who was diagnosed with kawasaki disease. For those who are not familiar with this disease it can manifest like a regular viral fever with very common symptoms like a rash, fever, red eyes and lips. There are a few other symptoms that are more characteristic of this disease but it is a disease that is difficult to diagnose as not all children present with all the classic symptoms. Unfortunately with this disease it is a race against time as the later treatment is offered, the worse off the prognosis. Serious complications such as heart disease or even death may occur in some children who are untreated. It is basically every mothers nightmare.
The point of this post is not to talk about this disease. As I deal with the aftermath of my child's recovery, I am disappointed to say that my experience with this disease cannot possibly be positive but it is made infinitely worst by a doctor who is not empathetic and inpatient . I made a mental note to myself that I WILL share this story so that other mummies will know and make their own decisions on this feedback. As far as I am concerned a pediatrician 's role other than treating the child involves managing and counseling the parent about the illness, in particular a serious one. It was my first experience with Dr Xx from kinder clinic paragon. He came highly recommended from a friends friend. My own job involves many interactions with medical professions and have worked in a hospital for a couple of years so when my son had this unrelenting fever , as with many mummies I know, my first reaction was to google and ask around. By day 5 I had pretty much worked out my sons problem and I wanted just a confirmation and a hospital admission. As with all mothers, it is natural to be anxious and worried. As I had already read many things online, I didn't have many questions except when will therapy commence. When Dr Xx came round to see my son , I had only one question for him, I asked about the side effects of the medication given to my son. His response was almost to the effect of " what choice do you have" although it wasn't put in that way.and the feeling I got is like him saying " dont't even ask me this type of dumb question again then Instead of answering my question, he left and never came back after saying he had to respond to a phone call. I decided to forget it thinkingwcu maybe he had a long day. The second morning he came to visit , he was in a better mood ( prob it's early and nobody had the chance to irritate him yet). In the evening when he returned to check on my son again, this time I asked him another question and what he did next shocked me ! He actually started scolding me and saying I was worrying unnecessarily and that I was not trusting him to do his job. This really shocked and upset me. Although my son is not dying or in ICU, i think this situations renders me to be worried and naturally I will be anxious and will ask questions. It wasnt like i m over- reacting over a simple cough or cold, as i described before , this situation can have serious implications. His shocking response made me feel 100x worse than before i had met him to discuss my son and yet i thought talking to a dr should make me feel better? The way he raised his voice at me was to humiliate me so I wouldn't ask more questions. In my mind, even if I asked 10 stupid questions, it is his job to reassure me. I got no reassurance at all but instead got a big dressing down! After this happened, I broke into tears...after 3 nights of not sleeping and endless worries, I got treated this way by someone I am paying to see my son.
For those who are in the know. Kawasaki disease doesn't have a big support group like some other more common children's diseases. I do not know another person whose child has kawasaki and my dr was suppose to be my source of information and yet this was what I got. In the end for the sake of my son, I tried not to think about it but I cannot help being thoroughly traumatized by this experience with him. He may have the skills but his bed side manner with my son and most definitely his EQ is very low. He has no patience and has no empathy. I wonder why is he even in this line if he is so inpatient with questions. In the end, I decided to not talk to him at all and just talk to the nurses if I had any questions. This wasn't because I was afraid of him but I just didn't want to be risking getting upset over his lousy attitude instead I need to focus on my son.
Some mummies who have had positive experiences may disagree with me but I have no interest to bad mouth a doctor for the sake of it. It had just affected me so much that I promised myself I will share with others so others won't need to suffer like I did. In the end, his attitude had changed for the better ( he probably notice I had gone from asking questions to completely not talking to him anymore. Still I will never take my child to him again