Any good & sincere Lawyer to recommend for divorce/separation

The law protects the woman. I earn twice more than my ex hub but he judge still ask him to pay maintenance $500 for the child. According to lawyer, most child goes to the mum unless proven the mum can't care for the child. So if u are working and able to get support from family to take care, dun worry of custody. If ur ex did not pay acorrding to judgment, u can go directly to family court to sue him. They will help u to send a letter to him. If still dun pay, he can be jailed
 
I don hav any support here, all my family in m'sia... I had been putting my gal in infant care since she is 2mths + till now... My fren n Colleague n boss is very supportive... Will allow me to take leave when necessary... Sometimes my frens will help to take care of her for me so tat I can rest for a while... Cos my gal very attach to me so I must b ard ... But so far she is adapting in infant care wif no problem just frequent sick which expected...
 

siling87

Member
Hi all.. im currently asking for separation from his too but he doesnt wan to agree to anything and refuse to sign anything. He also say i am not capable of taking care of my 18months old girl whereby i have been doing it since birth till she is 14months and i come out to work. But now he tell me i am not going to take my baby with me (move out) .He say at least he have his parent to look aft her but i dont have. what his parent do is play with her, feed her etc. I am very sure they cant give her wat she wants neither he can. my bond with my baby is very strong. But he jus want to take her away from me.

can somebody tell me what i can do? I am very sad knowing that he doesnt allow me to take my baby. should i get a lawyer to do this? we married only for 2 years.
She is your baby and u have the right to take her with you.

When me and my ex first quarrel, I took my boy with me back to my parent's house.
My sis in law called and scream at him. Command me to return them the boy- I told her that she has not right cuz I am the mother.
My ex-hub took his birthcert away- I called the police.
I believe you don't need a lawyer. If they ever tired to take ur child away from you or don't allow you to take your baby, call the police(the fastest way). Alway tell yourself, you are the mother and no one has the right to separate you and your child.

Maybe you can send her to childcare?
 

siling87

Member
Hi Willows,

Dont think this way.

I had my currenly bf with him for 4 years and to my boy, he love his daddy(my bf)
He want his daddy more that me.
They bath together, they can go out together without me. My boy love him more than me. Sometimes I really thought of given up in this relationship but thinking of the bonding between them makes me hold on tight. I believe there will be one man worthy of your love and also love your girl.
 

willows

Member
Siling,

Happy for you that you've found a good partner.

I don't have such luck. Furthermore I am currently finding my path and trying to settle down with my girl now. Just hope to see rainbow after the tunnel.

Now I never think of having another partner at this moment. Now I just want to get over my ex and live happily with my girl.

Btw, my ex is more eager to get a divorce then me. Seems like he had planned all these long time ago. The reason that he file for divorce are all craps and lies. I shall contest on his reason for divorce. He accuse me of many many unreasonable stuff. When my lawyer saw his reasons he was laughing off. I will fight all the way for my rights.
 

Ting

Well-Known Member
Hi all.. im currently asking for separation from his too but he doesnt wan to agree to anything and refuse to sign anything. He also say i am not capable of taking care of my 18months old girl whereby i have been doing it since birth till she is 14months and i come out to work. But now he tell me i am not going to take my baby with me (move out) .He say at least he have his parent to look aft her but i dont have. what his parent do is play with her, feed her etc. I am very sure they cant give her wat she wants neither he can. my bond with my baby is very strong. But he jus want to take her away from me.

can somebody tell me what i can do? I am very sad knowing that he doesnt allow me to take my baby. should i get a lawyer to do this? we married only for 2 years.
u r the mother, no one can take your child away from you, even your husb. the judge would usually give the mother the child's custody(esp if the kid is under 4), unless the mother is deemed unfit to take care of the child. since u hv a job now, and can bring your girl up with your ex husb giving u maintenance fee, shldnt be an issue. :)
 

Ting

Well-Known Member
I'm paying my gal's infant care fees, milk powders, pampers...etc, he ever claimed "wouldn't pay me a single cents", now sometime he will give when he remember but most of d times I will rejected and only took a bit for electricity, property tax, town council & Starhub cable tv... My salary just enough to support myself n gal.. Will tis affect if I request for maintainence fees frm him when I file for divorce? Will d judge said I can manage myself then y I need to ask maintainence fees frm him? Can anyone advice me in tis?

Most of d bb stuffs are paid by me he only paid few things but not his money as well cos is paid by his Aunty or d ang bao money frm his families...
maintenance fee for the child MUST be given, whether he likes it or not. even u earning 10K a month and he earns only 1K, your husb still need to give you maintenance fee for your child. yes, the law protects the women, so the men hv to suck it up!
 

Ting

Well-Known Member
Siling,

Happy for you that you've found a good partner.

I don't have such luck. Furthermore I am currently finding my path and trying to settle down with my girl now. Just hope to see rainbow after the tunnel.

Now I never think of having another partner at this moment. Now I just want to get over my ex and live happily with my girl.

Btw, my ex is more eager to get a divorce then me. Seems like he had planned all these long time ago. The reason that he file for divorce are all craps and lies. I shall contest on his reason for divorce. He accuse me of many many unreasonable stuff. When my lawyer saw his reasons he was laughing off. I will fight all the way for my rights.
dont be disheartened. :) somtimes fate plays a very impt role, and many times, it gets to u very unexpectedly. i nvr thought of finding another man whom i can settle down with after breaking up with my ex. i had bfs, but not so serious to tt extent, more like just dating and gg out. then one fine day, i went out to party with my gfs and i met my current bf. well, nvr thought we will end up in a long n serious r/s.. and we are getting married next yr. :) so.. just let nature take its course ba!
 

willows

Member
Ting,

I old already loh. Cannot party loh. But seriouly I need to get my life settle down first before I could think of any other things.
 

Ting

Well-Known Member
Ting,

I old already loh. Cannot party loh. But seriouly I need to get my life settle down first before I could think of any other things.
haha no la. im not asking u to party but what i mean is that, of ALL places i met my better half there.. haha!! many of my friends also quite surprised that he is a good man~ dun worry and think too much lor, fate always come unexpectedly! :) now just focus on stabalizing things. :D
 

willows

Member
Hi Ting, thanks for the encouragement.

Now what is in my mind will be how to get settle down with my new life. Financial planning like housing loan, daily expenses of me and my girl etc. And also how to bring up my girl and make her grow up happily with mummy only.

I can tell u I am a clueless mum. Many many worries about my girl.
 
We r not cruel just planning d best for her... The reality always cruel that we do not have choice but to plan accordingly... Who do not want our kids to grow up in complete family but just our luck married someone like tis. We cant blame anyone but faith or karma... Is a test, whether we can pass or fail? Easier to say to let go but when come to doing it will be difficult. I rather to live a life without him than live a life which everyday quarrel, it will impact more on our kid in long term...
 
totally agree.

We r not cruel just planning d best for her... The reality always cruel that we do not have choice but to plan accordingly... Who do not want our kids to grow up in complete family but just our luck married someone like tis. We cant blame anyone but faith or karma... Is a test, whether we can pass or fail? Easier to say to let go but when come to doing it will be difficult. I rather to live a life without him than live a life which everyday quarrel, it will impact more on our kid in long term...
 

poppy

New Member
Hi. Happy to see this thread going on. Hope to get some advice from all of you.

I'd consulted a lawyer last wk, and he gave me some instructions on what to start preparing...my grounds for divorce, list of expenses etc. He said that he'll email me about our discussion, but up till now, I haven't seen his email. Don't know whether I understood wrongly, but just wondering whether this will be a good lawyer for me if he doesn't do good follow up. Hmm. Another thing is that he seems to be one of those who prefer to "settle". Cld be because that is obviously the cheapest and fastest way out, but I feel that my soon-to-be ex is going to fight me for the flat and money, so don't know whether my lawyer is "fierce" enough. Another question is how much going to court will cost me if I were to fight my ex. Sigh.

Damn sian that he's the one who wants to get a divorce but doesn't want to file, so I hv to end up paying more than him in fees?

Also, one last qn. For your mummies, how did you settle the issue about your hse/flat? In my case, he paid for the majority through his CPF. I read online that unless the court orders him to transfer his share to me, and postpone the refund of his CPF funds, the only way for me to continue staying in my flat is for him to sell me his share, but I'll hv to repay all his CPF. I do hv some cash savings, but I need all the money I have for the days going forward. :(

Appreciate your advice..... Sigh. Thanks.
 
Hi Poppy,

I feel that engaging a good lawyer is very important especially when we will be going to court. If u have no confidence in the lawyer or you feel unsure, maybe u can go look around for more choices.. See which lawyer you prefer.. Usually after meeting the lawyer, they will send you an email to update you about the meeting and points discussed. Thats what my lawyer will send to me. In any case, going to court will surely cost a lot of money probably 10k or more.. depending how long the case drags. For me, i hire a good lawyer from those big company. Of course will be very expensive but if im in good hands, i dont mind paying for the money. Im currently in a lawsuit too. Stay strong!
 
I think there should be good kind hearted lawyers who can do good favours for those unfortunate ones. If they win the case, they can recoup the fees from the other side?:Dancing_tongue:
 

Ting

Well-Known Member
Hi Ting, thanks for the encouragement.

Now what is in my mind will be how to get settle down with my new life. Financial planning like housing loan, daily expenses of me and my girl etc. And also how to bring up my girl and make her grow up happily with mummy only.

I can tell u I am a clueless mum. Many many worries about my girl.
dont worry so much, u'll do fine. we all learn as we go. the world is so vast, and many things just happen expectantly. take some time to adapt to the adjustment, your child will too. :) jiayou! :D
 

poppy

New Member
Hi Poppy,

I feel that engaging a good lawyer is very important especially when we will be going to court. If you have no confidence in the lawyer or you feel unsure, maybe you can go look around for more choices.. See which lawyer you prefer.. Usually after meeting the lawyer, they will send you an email to update you about the meeting and points discussed. Thats what my lawyer will send to me. In any case, going to court will surely cost a lot of money probably 10k or more.. depending how long the case drags. For me, i hire a good lawyer from those big company. Of course will be very expensive but if im in good hands, i dont mind paying for the money. Im currently in a lawsuit too. Stay strong!
Thanks Mandy. Are you also at the start of proceedings? You sound very confident and prepared. :) For me, I seem very confident on the outside, but inside, a part of me wishes to dig a hole, bury myself in the ground, in the hope that somehow things will work themselves through. Sigh. But that's just defeatist.

How much is your lawyer charging you? For the basic divorce arrangements, and then subsequently per hour for the "fight"? Is yours a female or male lawyer?

Yes, I'm going for a second opinion. Getting another contact from another friend. The first one still hasn't emailed me anything yet, so I'm having big doubts.

Hmm...10K or so, I can still afford. Sigh. Guess I better mentally prepare myself for that. He has already indicated that he'll let me hv custody. But I really need the flat, and it's going to be hard for me to refund his CPF monies, which will pretty much leave me with no $ left. Might even need to tk a bank loan.

Are you also trying to get your matrimonial home too? Any advice your lawyer gave you?

Oh... wondering whether anyone else might also be able to share their take on child maintainance. My lawyer said that the amt asked for, shld be based on current situation i.e. whatever we're spending on my child currently. In future, when the amt changes, we'll need to go back to court to request for more money. Is that the way typically? But each time, we want to change the sum, we hv to go get a lawyer and go back to court?
 
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