Employing maid

mycano

Member
I am in the same situation as your except my maid behaves only when my sister is around. it is really very hard to pay and yet to tolerate the attitude of the maid
 

elainetan10

New Member
I just delivered my baby in Jan 2012.

My hubby & I decided to have a Burmese domestic helper as Indonesian govt keeps on changing rules & I can't speak Bahasa. We are not keen on Filipino maids as they can be quite hard to handle, will speak u more and want off days, hp etc. However, my Burmese helper some times drives me up the wall too!

On last Sun, she demanded for her salary from me when she had only worked for less than 2 weeks with us! I told her we had paid her loan of 7 mths to the agency on her behalf. I was so upset (worsened by post-natal blues) that I called my hubby who rushed home. Called the maid agency who got the translator to talk to her & explain clearly. The maid said it was her sister who asked her to ask. Hubby should not have made the calls for her to Myanmar & Malaysia using his handphone. She eats a lot too... 7 slices of bread & thick milo for breakfast. 3 bowls of rice during lunch / dinner. We allow her to eat as much as she wants. But she is very no "automatic". Hubby told me he would be home late, so I ate first, then asked maid to scoop rice and leave some for Sir. She scooped a lot for herself, and left very little for my hubby. In future, if hubby is coming home late, I must ration her portion of rice. Hubby said country folks usually tend to eat more, and eat more rice, plus we are providing her free food, so of coz she would tend to over-eat.

Hubby said I should not have spoilt her by allowing her to sit at the same table to eat with us. Now she will sit in the kitchen to eat. We had bought new mattress, new pillow, new bedsheets, new blanket, new fan, toiletries (toothbrush, toothpaste, container to put toothpaste & brush, shower stuff & towel, pail) and 5 pairs of bermudas for her (coz she wears jeans in the home to work. She only has 1 handcarry bag.) But I doubt she is really appreciative! (see below)

In her biodata, she stated she is willing to take care of newborn, willing to go without handphone. Guess what, in less than 1 wk, she asked me if she could have a handphone after 6 mths. She also said she would want to work in Malaysia after her 2-year contract as her sister & auntie are there. Hubby has a uncle with a Burmese maid - mother in law called her to talk to our maid. Our maid complains that she has to wake up at night to look after baby when he cries - changes diaper, milk. My hubby & I also wake up at night when baby cries. In fact, we ask the maid to sleep at 9am. She wakes up at 7+am. Both hubby & I zzz at midnight or even later to tend to baby's night feed first. I even allow the maid to take afternoon nap but she didn't say that to hubby's uncle's Burmese maid! 1st time getting a maid. Now I know why hubby said cannot spoil them!

I had to tell her to take in the laundry or she would not do so. The other day, I asked her to take afternoon nap & when it rained heavily, she didn't even realise. Today, I saw the grey sky & heard thunder, I quickly asked her to take in the clothes. She was sitting in baby's room and was in a daze... very stone and blur.
You're lucky enough your hubby is the one who tells you not to spoil them. Sighz.....the problems they give are like the river, never-ending.
 
Last edited:

mummynista

New Member
Hi mummynista, can you recommend me the agency that you finally chose? My current transfer maid (ex-Singapore 1 year) is giving me headaches. She's appeared honest, eager, reliable, hard-working and all that when I interviewed her but when she came to us, it was not all roses and daisies. She was transferred because she was being bullied by the other maid who worked with that employer for years...but she endured as she wanted to finish contract and bring home money for her 2yr daughter and family. She has a slightly different attitude/behaviour when sir is around, and when i talk to her about doing her chores properly, in the way I taught her to, she gaves me an impatient tone and tells me: "Ma'aaaam, I knoooooow..." (of course, Sir isn't around to see that). I usually talk to her in a normal tone, and she just keep telling me "nothing", or gives me that irritating "ma'aam, I know" tone and look until I get so fed-up that I had to give her my firm and angry voice.

Once, I asked her why she didn't follow my instructions of having to walk beside my daughter when they went downstairs to wait for the school bus. (they were walking in different directions to reach the roundabout, my daughter was running behind the building while the maid went directly to the roundabout without following my daughter). She tried to lie saying she did walk together. I told her I saw what happened while walking towards them. And when she knew she couldn't lie, she told my daughter off sternly, in front of me without even apologising or appear sorry for lying to me or for not following my instructions!!! I was speechless when that happened! Just for the records, I reprimanded my daughter for running and not following my maid also. Afterwards, I told my maid: "Remember when you first came, I told you that you are here to work, not to be scolded or beaten by my children. Similarly, you are not to scold or beat them. If they are naughty, you have to come tell me and I will punish them myself."

I'm almost like suffering in silence, pickin up the bits and pieces after my maid who didnt do her chores properly since I got fed up talking to her when she's either says "oh, i forgot" or "i know mdm" but still don't do. I end up taking a deep breathe and do it myself without a second word....

I'm not saying she's not good, but she sorta gives me the creeps. Behaving differently when Sir is around, talking to me in that manner doesn't suggest to me she will be easily bullied, having the audacity to tell my daughter off right in my face!!

Hi Elaine, I've PM-ed ya my agent's contact. You can perhaps tell her your situation and ask her for advice on how to get out of it or your viable options in changing the helper. Did you complain to your current agency? Since you've paid for their services, they should be obliged to solve your problem or offer you a replacement maid. Don't let them take advantage of you.

Oh dear your helper must be giving you such a tough time! How long have ya had her for? Maybe your husband and you can find time to speak to her and find out what's her issue? And perhaps drop a friendly 'threat' that if things don't turn out well, you'll just need to let her go.

Guess sometimes these maids think that you are reliant on them and that you will have no choice but tolerate whatever nonsense they give you.
 

mummynista

New Member
Hi mummynista, my agent will listen to my complaints and talk to the maid if necessary. They allow me to change maid, new or transfer but depending on what I want, I still need to 'topup' the difference in agent fee + whatever other costs that comes along like insurance, test, documentation, etc.

My guy feels its the way I communicate, perhaps its true, but he fails to empathize with me on how long or how many times I have repeated the same instructions to the point that I could no longer appear nice nor patient with the maid when dealing with the same issue. Its almost like we will one day quarrel and separate cos of our differences in 'maid treatment'. Definitely NOT worth it.
I see, that's not too bad then. Perhaps you call up few more agencies and see if they charge these 'extras' when you change maid, you know just to be sure. I think new insurance charges have to be paid but as for the others, i'm not too sure.

Yea definitely not worth fighting with your hubby over a helper. And must never fight in front of the helper, it gives her power and will cause her lose respect for you. Have a conversation with hubby and let him know that no matter how much he disagree with you, do it behind closed doors. In front of the helper, he needs to be always on your side and be your ally.
 

Kelly80

New Member
Any one have transfer Indonesia maid (know a bit English), pls let me know. Previously I hire a maid who work for me 3 days n decide want get trf. I lost levy n one mth salary. Is the maid insist want trf n not I don't want her. This maid agency called me n told me the maid want work with me n is I don't want her, after the maid being council. This is bull shit. I told the agent, I will go down to their center n confront with her. Later, the agent said no need. My husband send the maid back to agent n the maid admit she not comfortable work with us. My hse is simple n my children in child care full day. She said, she don't like use hand to wipe floor. We did not use mop to wipe floor. Maybe she is fat n complain back pain at the 2nd day. Next time, I will not hire short n fat. Indonesia maid. Terrible
 

Kelly80

New Member
Hi there. I just called the agent to enqury maid agent fees. She told me there have trf indo maid which they gurantee is good. I ask her ,if she good, why ask for trf? The agent said, is because the employer refuse to pay for the maid hair cut n request the maid cut her hair 2 time a week. Pls advice whether I should give this trf maid a try ot not.
 

mycano

Member
Talk to the maid, try to probe and talk other non related stuffs with the maid, see how she react to your question and see what is she like in her reply.

see how comfortable you are with the maid
 

Kelly80

New Member
Thanx mycano, so far I have not take any trf maid. Will try talk to the maid. But, my son see her face, already say don't like because she had a big mouth. Sign......
 

Frenchkitty

Member
Any one have transfer Indonesia maid (know a bit English), pls let me know. Previously I hire a maid who work for me 3 days n decide want get trf. I lost levy n one mth salary. Is the maid insist want trf n not I don't want her. This maid agency called me n told me the maid want work with me n is I don't want her, after the maid being council. This is bull shit. I told the agent, I will go down to their center n confront with her. Later, the agent said no need. My husband send the maid back to agent n the maid admit she not comfortable work with us. My hse is simple n my children in child care full day. She said, she don't like use hand to wipe floor. We did not use mop to wipe floor. Maybe she is fat n complain back pain at the 2nd day. Next time, I will not hire short n fat. Indonesia maid. Terrible

That's the risk of getting a fresh maid because of the many months loan you have to pay for her and she can choose not to work for you anytime and request for transfer, end up losing end is yourself & your family because you paid few thousands of $$$.

Personally I prefer transfer maid because if you choose properly, those who have finished or almost finished their 1st contract means you dont have to pay any maid loans. Just pay for insurance and paperwork by agency will do. Saves you ALOT of $$.
Pros of transfer maid is that you can get to interview the maid face-to-face and see her reaction and how you like her. Plus she is already in SG that means you dont have to worry about passprt approval / medical clearance etc. Plus, the waiting time for your transfer maid is only 1-2 weeks compared to 4-6 weeks for a maid to come from overseas.

As for interviewing a Transfer maid, there are many questions which you can ask her:
- Why did you get Transferred? (This is very important Qn. Of cos there may be many reasons but one man's trash MAY BE another's treasure. She could be abused? Stole $$? Or made too many mistakes/ broken too many things? Not suitable to work in HUGE Bungalow because she is overloaded with work? All these reasons you need to assess whether acceptable to you or not.)
**For my Hubby's grandma's maid, she was transferred because her ex-employer found her too slow in cleaning their landed house, but now she is only working in a 4-room flat looking after my Hub's 88-yr old Grandma so she is very happy. She has been working for 2+yrs already.
**For my cousin's Transfer maid, she was transferred because the old lady she looked after had passed away before her contract ended. My cousin took her to look after her elderly Grandma also. She is diligent and is already "well-trained" in carrying/ feeding/ bathing elderly. She even sleep with Grandma at night cos she doesnt mind waking up at night for her toileting needs. My cousin is very happy.
** For my own maid, she is transferred because she was abused by her ex-employer and my Agent showed us police report as proof. She has worked in that family for 1.5yrs and they never gave her salary and often beat her. She can work very well in my household and she said she is happy working for us, and she has good initiative. We are very lucky to have hired her.

- have you worked in a household with children before?
- How many younger/ older siblings do you have? Did you need to take care of them ?(some maids even though never worked in homes w kids but they hv looked after younger siblings before)
- What does your family / husband do?? (Mostly farmers or odd-job workers so ask her how she helps out in her family to assess her responsibility level & knowledge of Housework)
- Before coming to work as a maid, what did you do in your country?? (She could have been a waitress/ helped at farm/ sales promoter. All these jobs can let you assess her maturity level/ understanding of simple English)

Then you can also let her know a bit about your household. Your chores/ time table/ what is expected of her (short nails? Short hair? No hp?? No kissing & sharing food with children??) All these terms you must state out clearly to her so she cannot say she didn't know and Regret working for you.

So far my Hubby's Grandma's, my cousin's and my own maids are Indonesian transfer maids. We find them least problematic of all.
All the best in your maid search!!
 
Last edited:
Aiyo. seems like i'm not the only one.
My fantastic maid came and this was what happened during the 7 months she was with me:
1st month, 2nd week: complained and said want to go home cos nothing to do. (Cos she can finish cleaning my whole flat within 2 hrs)
1st month, 3rd week: complained and said want to go home cos mam gave her too many things to do. (Cos she does not clean all the places that she thinks we can't see, e.g. under the table, under the bed, if there are things on the table, no cleaning, etc.)
1st month, 4th week: complained and said want to go home cos mam shouts at her.
We brought her to the agency and she told the agent: She wants to go home cos we don't want her. ?????
Agent told us to give her another chance, so we gave in.

For the records, once she was here, she was given her OWN room (We stay in a 4-room flat), OWN cabinet, shampoo, towel, soap, toothbrush, toothpaste, sanitary pads... and was told that if she need more, she can just ask from us. CNY brought her out to eat sharks fins. We let her eat everything that we eat.

2nd month every week: Wants to call home IMMEDIATELY regardless what you are doing. I can be changing my baby's diapers, and she can be standing next to me, and told me want to call home, and she wants me to give her the phone immediately (I do not have a house phone). Gave in once, twice, and we made her wait according to our time.

3rd month: Told Sir that she wants a handphone. Want Sir to buy for her.

7th month: Shouted at me when I showed her the dust in the baby's room. My husband was shocked. She screamed and shouted that the dust flew in and she has cleaned in the morning. Then threatened again and again that she wants to go home. It was only until my husband told her to stop lying as the layer of dust was quite thick that she kept quiet.
I called the agent, and the agent scolded her. She was then made to apologise to me, and made to stay until she finishes her loan by the agent.
Of cos her apology was damn unhappy and even ended with : I will go home once I finish the loan.
I shut her off by saying I am the boss, so you go and work when I tell you to work.

Recently, she treated me as invisible. If I come back home carrying a lot of stuff, she won't take anything from me. When my husband is around, she will automatically take from my husband. There was 1 day when I went out with my mum and baby. Both of us were carrying a lot of things, and she did not take anything from us. My mum was very shocked, commented that my maid does not even take anything from us, but did not scold the maid. Instead, she went to the baby's room to clean the baby. Told the maid to bring the basin to me to take the water, and the maid left the basin on the kitchen table, which I did not know until I went to the baby room to check on my girl. Mum asked me where's the water, and that was when I asked her where the basin. She pointed to the kitchen table with a super black face, and I told her off that I am the mam. If I don't talk to you, I can don't talk to you. You are the maid. If you want to be like this, and don't want to work, then you don' take my money.

She went back to her room, and then went back to the kitchen where I was there alone, and started shouting at me again, thinking that my mum can't hear. She said that it was all my fault, said that I don't talk to her. (Truth was... when I talked to her, she complained to my husband said that I shout at her. When I don't talk to her, she complained to my husband that I don't like her. Even my husband told her off.), and on and on. All I did was repeatedly said 'never mind, never mind.' (cos we are going to send her back in 35 days time). Then my mum came into the kitchen and scolded her. She changed immediately and told my mum that I was the one who scolded and shouted at her. My mum was so shocked, and told her straight to stop lying, cos she heard everything from the living room. Then she kept quiet immediately.

I seriously can't wait for her to disappear from my house. I have never felt so unappreciated before in my entire life!
This is what she needs to do:
1. Clean the house
2. Cook meals for us (from Monday to Friday)

That's all! At first, got her in to look after my girl, but found her shaking my girl so roughly, that I look after my girl myself. She cannot touch my baby. Then my FIL has a stroke, so she was supposed to look after my FIL. But FIL recovered quite well, so became independent, and she again don't need to do it.

Things she eat:
We bring her everywhere, e.g. restaurants... to eat good stuff like us. Once there was a whole chicken, she went straight for the drumstick. We ordered KFC, each of us have 1 pc, and she ate 3 pcs. We ordered prawns, and she kept eating the prawns. When she was first here, she will finish her rice. Now no. She will also not waste food or drink. Now bring her out, buy her mineral water cos she wants, she will drink 1-2 mouthful, and threw the whole bottle away. Previously will eat leftovers (e.g. from yesterday dinner, or today's lunch), now, super black face. Previously eat everything we gave her, now she will go check the food and if she don't like it, she will tell you she don't want to eat.

ARRRGGGGHHHH
 

mummynista

New Member
Just got my indonesian helper in yesterday, will keep everyone updated on the progress. Meanwhile checked with my agency, I can change the helper free-of-charge( no agency cost) within a year if it doesn't work out.:)
 

Taurus56

New Member
Hi, am looking for a maid to take care of my Dad, who is bed-ridden (afflicted with stroke). Ive had my share of horrors with e maids & agents. i am lookin for either an indian/ nepalese/ myanmar. if u have any info on a reliable maid agency, pls let me know. thanks.
 

babywaby

New Member
Getting a good maid is really a matter of luck and also depends on whether we can trust the person.
I got a Indon maid 1 month before my EDD. Baby is now 2 months.
She quite young but has one child so
I thought can look after baby when I go back to work. And claim she can cook.
She's ok and listen to instructions. But need to repeat and and no common sense sometimes. And very sensitive. Small small
Things she want to lie cos she scared I'll be angry or scold her.
I don't feel comfortable leaving the baby with her and going to work. But don't know wat to do. No elders to supervise.
Its like having another child in the house. Need to tell her to eat. Cannot scold. I already told her many times if I scold it's cos
The work not done properly. Then it's over. I don't harp on it.
Once she thought I saw and gave guilty look. When I asked her why she so sheepish then she say she dropped the baby's teat while making milk. Because she thought I saw as change new one. If not??
Haiz. I wanna source for babysitter or infant care but hubby feels maid is the best option for us.
Dont know wat to do.
 

Kelly80

New Member
That's the risk of getting a fresh maid because of the many months loan you have to pay for her and she can choose not to work for you anytime and request for transfer, end up losing end is yourself & your family because you paid few thousands of $$$.

Personally I prefer transfer maid because if you choose properly, those who have finished or almost finished their 1st contract means you dont have to pay any maid loans. Just pay for insurance and paperwork by agency will do. Saves you ALOT of $$.
Pros of transfer maid is that you can get to interview the maid face-to-face and see her reaction and how you like her. Plus she is already in SG that means you dont have to worry about passprt approval / medical clearance etc. Plus, the waiting time for your transfer maid is only 1-2 weeks compared to 4-6 weeks for a maid to come from overseas.

As for interviewing a Transfer maid, there are many questions which you can ask her:
- Why did you get Transferred? (This is very important Qn. Of cos there may be many reasons but one man's trash MAY BE another's treasure. She could be abused? Stole $$? Or made too many mistakes/ broken too many things? Not suitable to work in HUGE Bungalow because she is overloaded with work? All these reasons you need to assess whether acceptable to you or not.)
**For my Hubby's grandma's maid, she was transferred because her ex-employer found her too slow in cleaning their landed house, but now she is only working in a 4-room flat looking after my Hub's 88-yr old Grandma so she is very happy. She has been working for 2+yrs already.
**For my cousin's Transfer maid, she was transferred because the old lady she looked after had passed away before her contract ended. My cousin took her to look after her elderly Grandma also. She is diligent and is already "well-trained" in carrying/ feeding/ bathing elderly. She even sleep with Grandma at night cos she doesnt mind waking up at night for her toileting needs. My cousin is very happy.
** For my own maid, she is transferred because she was abused by her ex-employer and my Agent showed us police report as proof. She has worked in that family for 1.5yrs and they never gave her salary and often beat her. She can work very well in my household and she said she is happy working for us, and she has good initiative. We are very lucky to have hired her.

- have you worked in a household with children before?
- How many younger/ older siblings do you have? Did you need to take care of them ?(some maids even though never worked in homes w kids but they have looked after younger siblings before)
- What does your family / husband do?? (Mostly farmers or odd-job workers so ask her how she helps out in her family to assess her responsibility level & knowledge of Housework)
- Before coming to work as a maid, what did you do in your country?? (She could have been a waitress/ helped at farm/ sales promoter. All these jobs can let you assess her maturity level/ understanding of simple English)

Then you can also let her know a bit about your household. Your chores/ time table/ what is expected of her (short nails? Short hair? No hp?? No kissing & sharing food with children??) All these terms you must state out clearly to her so she cannot say she didn't know and Regret working for you.

So far my Hubby's Grandma's, my cousin's and my own maids are Indonesian transfer maids. We find them least problematic of all.
All the best in your maid search!!


Thanx Frenchkitty, i got my transfer maid today and need some monitoring. The most important part is my children. Till now my eldest son did not welcome her. ehm...a bit difficult to persued. He keep thinking me ex-maid (pretty look).
 
Top