Feeling Down, Emotional... Need To Vent Abit & Cry

[mich_liu82]

I'm kinda feeling down... As probably my hubby says I am just being emotional...

Wanted to write this in my blog, but I guess there might be no response and decided to write here...

I guess I have been thinking too much until I 'm kinda feeling depressed, worried that I can't take it anymore...

So many things I'm angry and disappointed about...

1. Stupid maid went back for vocation and play me out, didn't come back.

2. From then till now I've got a little help, as in my hubby's auntie just come over to help me feed baby when I am pumping my milk. Nowadays she more zi tong abit, at least help me hang laundry and wash cups if not previously I was doing everything myself, from washing and hanging of laundry, vacuuming, mopping, cleaning, packing. Can die!

3. Hubby's auntie dont know when everytime carry my #3 dear daughter, the diapers always will leak and overflow, then she say this brand no good, but when I using by myself, no problem at all...

4. 3rd week after maid left, I interviewed 1 maid and decided to have her transferred but the stupid transfer took so long and end up we decided to cancel it, but if i had waited, now I think I will have her already, dont know if I did a stupid choice.

5. In between, if you guys read my other threads, I had a part time maid that i wanted to employ her permanently but I decided too late, she was taken by sum1 else already. However, when she was working with me at dat time, while I was so called interviewing her, talking to her, my hubby stupid auntie kept interuppting and scaring her, keep saying dont play play with baby or whatever shit. Until i tulan, didn;t ask further, that caused me to decide abit later... I was thinking if I had been rude instead of showing respect with my hubby auntie by telling her to shut up when I am talking then this wouldn't have happen, if I had been firm then now I have that maid ... Everyday, i keep thinking of this until I goin depressed soon.

6. My kids, #1 dear daughter so far alright, just dat everytime when she shower come out, I gotta nag at her to dry her hair, have been saying for so long still can't listen. Everyday must ask her got hmwrk or not, if not she will just pretend and take a long time to do it. Evrytime call her, she like in dream land...

7. #2 dear daughter, terrible, very naughty... Everytime throw things everywhere, then dont wanna keep, in e end, always I keep, hubby will only keep when I nag. Then always spill drinks, food everywhere, then I have to keep cleaning ad cleaning...

8. Hubby, nowadays i dare not to talk much or nag much, worried he snap again... Bcoz I can't take it if he snaps again, I guess this timne round, I might snap even harder then him and go mad... When i ask him to help out, he got lots of reasons to give, like I dont like the way he help or what... He see me changing bedsheets, he dont even volunteer to help... See drink spill, he dont bother to clean...

9. Den sumtimes when hubby talk nicely to me, I duno why I jus can't ans him properly, I noe sumtimes he feels dat im feeling down so he tries to tell me happy things but I jus like very cold...

Me me me, everything its me... I think i wanna go berserk soon...

I dont know when can I get a new maid, hopefully soon as my agent looking out 1 for me...

Then I'm still breastfeeding, every 6 to 8 hours, I need to pump milk... I do find it tedious, wanted to give up, but for the sake of my #3 dear daughter, i keep holding on...

I feel like I dont have enough rest everyday... I'm so afraid that I will break down soon... But yet at the same time, I keep telling myself I am a mother of 3, I need to stay strong for them... Deep inside, I know I will crumble anytime...

As I'm typing this, I keep controlling my tears, dont 1 anyone to see it...

Last nite, I sms hubby tell him I cannot take it , wanna break down soon. yes, he did console me by replying the sms. He was in the bedroom while I was in the living room, he can't even come out to give me a hug or sumthing?

I know we can't talk face to face bcoz always end up quarreling that is why we send sms.

In a way, at least after penning everything down here, I did feel alittle relieve...

Sigh, whats wrong with me? Is it me? Or is it everyone else?

 

[candy_ian]

i understand how u felt sent my previous maid back after confinement cos she started giving problems n survived 3 months without maid until this current one came. Hubby's business requires him to work at nite so night will b alone at hm with bb and day he will b slping. Had to juggle baby, housework n cooking. Din get mum's help cos she's living too far away so ended up not enough slp 4 past 3 months cos my bb total breastfeeding n i'm latching him on demand

 

[marinetank]

My wife is in her 1st trimister, all the housework i bao after work. It is very tiring, but i guess this is what i can do while she tries to handle her constant tireness and morning sickness.

Perhaps you would like to discuss with your hubby to take over all the housework, while you take time-out to relax and take care of your baby and young kids. Most guys do not like to be nagged or see moddy face everyday. Maintain a happy outlook and try to look at the positive side of all things.

If need to, how about drawing out a schedule who will take care of the 2 older ones in the evening when hubby is back. He is part of the family, and will need to share part of the responsibilities as well.

 

[mich_liu82]

My wife is in her 1st trimister, all the housework i bao after work. It is very tiring, but i guess this is what i can do while she tries to handle her constant tireness and morning sickness.

Perhaps you would like to discuss with your hubby to take over all the housework, while you take time-out to relax and take care of your baby and young kids. Most guys do not like to be nagged or see moddy face everyday. Maintain a happy outlook and try to look at the positive side of all things.

If need to, how about drawing out a schedule who will take care of the 2 older ones in the evening when hubby is back. He is part of the family, and will need to share part of the responsibilities as well.

Thanks!

Hubby does look after #2 DD, she sends her to Childcare, however, he is always late and she always misses her lessons, I tried to talk to him bout this, but he only answers so clever u send lor... Den when at home, #2 DD as I mention always very naughty, but he jus scold scold abit den nothing liao, if she spill drink, he dun even bother to clean... But he does shower and change her and accompany to sleep. But he only makes her sleep when he wants to sleep too which is pretty late for a child, then same thing, when I talk to him bout it, he oso say, so clever u do everything lor...

As much As I want to do everything, but knowing I can't...

Sigh, he is good in certain ways though I can't expect him to be perfect but for the well being of the kids, he jus can't listen...

Even tell him dun smoke in the master bed room toilet, he still go ahead n do it, den when I nag too much, he snaps...

U see, so many things I try talking to him nicely but he doesn't listen or choose to brush it aside. Of coz naturally if he doesn't do it, i will nag and he BTH... SIgh...

 

[mich_liu82]

i understand how you felt sent my previous maid back after confinement cos she started giving problems and survived 3 months without maid until this current one came. Hubby's business requires him to work at nite so night will b alone at hm with baby and day he will b sleeping. Had to juggle baby, housework and cooking. did not get mum's help cos she's living too far away so ended up not enough sleep 4 past 3 months cos my baby total breastfeeding and i'm latching him on demand

Thanks candy... Its really nice knowing you...

I totally understand how you feel... Oh, you latching him on demand, dats even more tiring... I can understand...

For me at night, I'm latching on demand...

Deprived of sleep, I can understand...

Sigh, for me, now looking at my figure, not slimming down oso makes me depressed...

I though by doing evrything myself is a gd way to slim down, but in e end did not at all...

 

[candy_ian]

i'm nt slimmin down much either haha. From xs to now m... Feeling hungry more often cos breastfeeding i guess.

 

[happymummyo7]

i'm not slimmin down much either haha. From xs to now m... Feeling hungry more often cos breastfeeding i guess.

im not the only one ah...
people always say breastfeed will lose wt very fast. was so happy till i realised i put on wt instead...
if i eat half bowl rice per meal. i will feel giddy when i breastfeed. so end up. eat more rice. more meal..

 

[mich_liu82]

i'm not slimmin down much either haha. From xs to now m... Feeling hungry more often cos breastfeeding i guess.

Yup, I agree... Feel more hungry thus will eat more...

Now I'm L size...

 

[mich_liu82]

im not the only one ...
people always say breastfeed will lose wt very fast. was so happy till i realised i put on wt instead...
if i eat half bowl rice per meal. i will feel giddy when i breastfeed. so end up. eat more rice. more meal..

Haha, ppl said dat... So I tot wah, dis time round I TBF so confirm i'll lose weight... But hor, in the end I think I put on weight... My 1st 2 kids I did nt lose at all, so i tot must be i nvr BF but now I realise BF or no BF oso same...

 

[happymummyo7]

Haha, ppl said dat... So I thought wah, this time round I TBF so confirm i'll lose weight... But , in the end I think I put on weight... My 1st 2 kids I did not lose at all, so i thought must be i never BF but now I realise BF or no BF also same...

my friend bf-ing then she losing wt damn fast. i thought i the only abnormal one. now know is normal. wont feel so jialat liao. haha.
my boy. every two hrs wake up for milk. after he finish his milk. my turn to find mam mam. dont why after feed will feel hungry.
yesterday went back to my office collect pay. my collegues all said, i look the SAME as when i was pregnant. except for the tummy. felt like banging wall lo.. 10:

 

[jojoki]

me also// whole pregnancy gained 8 kg.. after confinement lost 8kg 4 months after confinement.. gained back 6kg!!!! my gosh breastfeeding makes u soo hungry.. nowadays i look like a yellow face woman! wong pin po! i bochap also!

 

[jojoki]

I'm kinda feeling down... As probably my hubby says I am just being emotional...

Wanted to write this in my blog, but I guess there might be no response and decided to write here...

I guess I have been thinking too much until I 'm kinda feeling depressed, worried that I can't take it anymore...

So many things I'm angry and disappointed about...

1. Stupid maid went back for vocation and play me out, didn't come back.

2. From then till now I've got a little help, as in my hubby's auntie just come over to help me feed baby when I am pumping my milk. Nowadays she more zi tong abit, at least help me hang laundry and wash cups if not previously I was doing everything myself, from washing and hanging of laundry, vacuuming, mopping, cleaning, packing. Can die!

3. Hubby's auntie dont know when everytime carry my #3 dear daughter, the diapers always will leak and overflow, then she say this brand no good, but when I using by myself, no problem at all...

4. 3rd week after maid left, I interviewed 1 maid and decided to have her transferred but the stupid transfer took so long and end up we decided to cancel it, but if i had waited, now I think I will have her already, dont know if I did a stupid choice.

5. In between, if you guys read my other threads, I had a part time maid that i wanted to employ her permanently but I decided too late, she was taken by sum1 else already. However, when she was working with me at dat time, while I was so called interviewing her, talking to her, my hubby stupid auntie kept interuppting and scaring her, keep saying dont play play with baby or whatever shit. Until i tulan, didn;t ask further, that caused me to decide abit later... I was thinking if I had been rude instead of showing respect with my hubby auntie by telling her to shut up when I am talking then this wouldn't have happen, if I had been firm then now I have that maid ... Everyday, i keep thinking of this until I goin depressed soon.

6. My kids, #1 dear daughter so far alright, just dat everytime when she shower come out, I gotta nag at her to dry her hair, have been saying for so long still can't listen. Everyday must ask her got hmwrk or not, if not she will just pretend and take a long time to do it. Evrytime call her, she like in dream land...

7. #2 dear daughter, terrible, very naughty... Everytime throw things everywhere, then dont wanna keep, in e end, always I keep, hubby will only keep when I nag. Then always spill drinks, food everywhere, then I have to keep cleaning ad cleaning...

8. Hubby, nowadays i dare not to talk much or nag much, worried he snap again... Bcoz I can't take it if he snaps again, I guess this timne round, I might snap even harder then him and go mad... When i ask him to help out, he got lots of reasons to give, like I dont like the way he help or what... He see me changing bedsheets, he dont even volunteer to help... See drink spill, he dont bother to clean...

9. then sumtimes when hubby talk nicely to me, I dont know why I just can't ans him properly, I know sumtimes he feels dat im feeling down so he tries to tell me happy things but I just like very cold...

Me me me, everything its me... I think i wanna go berserk soon...

I dont know when can I get a new maid, hopefully soon as my agent looking out 1 for me...

Then I'm still breastfeeding, every 6 to 8 hours, I need to pump milk... I do find it tedious, wanted to give up, but for the sake of my #3 dear daughter, i keep holding on...

I feel like I dont have enough rest everyday... I'm so afraid that I will break down soon... But yet at the same time, I keep telling myself I am a mother of 3, I need to stay strong for them... Deep inside, I know I will crumble anytime...

As I'm typing this, I keep controlling my tears, dont 1 anyone to see it...

Last nite, I sms hubby tell him I cannot take it , wanna break down soon. yes, he did console me by replying the sms. He was in the bedroom while I was in the living room, he can't even come out to give me a hug or sumthing?

I know we can't talk face to face bcoz always end up quarreling that is why we send sms.

In a way, at least after penning everything down here, I did feel alittle relieve...

Sigh, whats wrong with me? Is it me? Or is it everyone else?

ya taking care of a home plus 4 kids (1 big + 3 small) is no joke! I salute you man! for me i wud hav i broke down ! somemore wth new baby can b so tiring. my hubby also hopeless in helping wth baby. yesterdat tv cable spoilt thn he die die must fix it at 2am.. told him go sleep do tmrw he dunwan said tmrw wanna watch tv dont wanna waste time fix. told him to clean fan wah he say soo late he wanna sleep! tol him fan very dusty not good fr baby lungs he say wait fr sunday!! just table fan not ceiling! tv cannot wait fan can wait??!! he and his blardy tv always more important thn anything!

hang on there mich! you can do it!!!

 

[Daddy D]

aiyo... mich... hang in there... I think it'll be useful to check out some marriage counselling... it's not up to u alone to solve all these problems that you're facing...
Wish u all the best!

 

[uddermummy]

heee, i also put on weight after bfing, cos i'm always so hungry, especially when dd's going through a growth spurt!

Yup, it's really not easy to have to look after so many kids, do the housework and bf! I take care of one dd already want to faint.

Sayang, maybe you want to talk to a counsellor, or a doctor? Cos sometimes talking to these pple may help.

 

[Stan]

hey mich... you are not super woman yaaaa!! it is okie to feel frustrated with having to cope with 3 young kids, hsework and everything, ok? just make sure you are not going through post natal depression or anythg.

Not sure if this helps but last time i will nag at hubby to do hsework and when he does it, is not up to my standards, i will nag some more... he will also tell me off like ur hubby lor so clever do yourself lah!!
Then i realised first not all men will zi tong one... if we need to open mouth to ask, just do it and dont feel why i hv to ask him then he will do it? Otherwise this will kill ourselves faster! When he is doing it, dont say not clean enough blah blah... just close one eye.. got do can liao....so far this strategy works out pretty well for me...
Stay strong!!

 

[stonston]

Mich you are already very strong. If it's me, I would have just left the kids at home & walked out of the house.

Housework & kids can drive a sane person insane. Tt's why I insist on having a maid even though my boy goes to CC. So I dun have to worry & nag at anyone.

I've learn to expect less & not be so disappointed with my hb. Don't expect him to help, don't expect him to do anything & u won't be angry already.

 

[Domique]

Just to make all of u feel better.... i wear biggest size i can find in the store for my bottom.... L i also cannot fit in at times...

Yup, I agree... Feel more hungry thus will eat more...

Now I'm L size...

 

[Tricia]

Please be strong.
I think I saw your post thread, sharing how you overcome your emotional thoughts before.

I think this is part of life especially a new baby means new struggles but new victories as well.

Also feeling stress now, though my 3rd baby coming in Sept.
Also feeling stress about getting a 3 months helper as alot of pple said "why just 3 months, by the time the helper is trained, she has to go."

Ai ya, becos of all the stress, I get angry with my husband very easily until he also cannot tahan me....

So now, try to remind myself to always go to God before I snap on my husband as I can see that it is affecting my relationaship with my husband.
I am playing with my husband's patience though he is very patience w me already but I better dont test it too much...

Dont know whether this will help or not, but just want to share you are not alone as many pple here is concern about you.

Will keep you in my prayer too...

 

[tika]

Hubby does look after #2 dear daughter, she sends her to Childcare, however, he is always late and she always misses her lessons, I tried to talk to him bout this, but he only answers so clever you send ... then when at home, #2 dear daughter as I mention always very naughty, but he just scold scold abit then nothing , if she spill drink, he dont even bother to clean... But he does shower and change her and accompany to sleep. But he only makes her sleep when he wants to sleep too which is pretty late for a child, then same thing, when I talk to him bout it, he also say, so clever you do everything ...

Dear mich, seems like he's not looking after or doing anything properly lehhh (since everything he does is always at HIS convenience).

Sigh, he is good in certain ways though I can't expect him to be perfect but for the well being of the kids, he just can't listen...

No one is perfect...not even Barack Obama! And he's supposedly an IDEAL father figure. But don't let THAT be your excuse to accepting someone who doesn't want to compromise and PRIORITISE.

you see, so many things I try talking to him nicely but he doesn't listen or choose to brush it aside. Of coz naturally if he doesn't do it, i will nag and he BTH... SIgh...

I agree with Daddy_D. It is not up to you alone to find solutions and face problems in a marriage/family. Assuming it won't be easy to persuade him to see a marriage counsellor (most guys have an ego issue, we all know that. lol), maybe telling him to do it for the sake of your sanity, will soften him?

 

[mich_liu82]

my friend bf-ing then she losing wt damn fast. i thought i the only abnormal one. now know is normal. wont feel so jialat . haha.
my boy. every two hours wake up for milk. after he finish his milk. my turn to find mam mam. dont why after feed will feel hungry.
yesterday went back to my office collect pay. my collegues all said, i look the SAME as when i was pregnant. except for the tummy. felt like banging wall .. 10:

I worse right? Yesterday went to a colleagues baby full month too, the other colleagues saw me like, you never lose weight hor? Instead u like put on weight right?