How often do u quarrel w ur spoUse..??

[lis]

Hi der..rite now..i'm feeling quite vexed over woteva happen to me today n oso ol tiz tym..! y muz HE (hubby) owaes quarrel w me over sumone else..?! for example - ma mom, brother, sis-in-law, stepfather, father, ma x, his parents..ezier to say is olmost everibodi tat link to me..! it's so irritating n tiring to quarrel w him everitym..! sumtyms it's over small issues lyk i forgot to throw ma son diaper in the bin..can u believe it..?? HE'll make a mountain out of a molehill..! Argh...!!!! i feel so stressed up..i juz duno wot to do..at tyms i do get soo angry n started throwing tantrums..instead of him comforting me, HE'll scold me back..do u tink it's fair..? n in the end i hav to comfort him n sae sorie tat i'm wrong..!! can ani of u see wer's the problem..?

ok..let me tell u sum facts bout ma family so u'll roughly noe wot is going on.

btn me n ma stepfather,ok he ever molest me for 3 tyms..the last tym wen i was in Sec 5..i couldn't take it anomire,i reported it to ma counsellor so ma mom was called down for the issue..she was v unhepi n she din even wanna tok to me..the issue ended up as a police case..thus he was send off to jail for 9 mths..! but tat's not enuf for me..it's too little..! it's b'coz ma mom kip pestering me to tell ma IO to close the case..she beg me not to send her HUSBAND to jail..! is she being fair to me..?! i'm her daughter n yet she's siding her beast husband..! n she even told me not to tell ma late brother(at tat tym,he's still alive) bout tiz..coz she noe it v well tat iv i tell ma bro,he'll beat him(stepfather) into pulp..HAHA..but ma elder bro knew bout tiz matter..but he kept mum oso..he oso pretend as thou nuting had happen to his sista..! tat's wen i felt so useless n started staying away frm hm..i started working n went to tampines to overnite w ma frens or cuzins..everidae was lyk tat for me..it's v tiring..but i can't do aniting but tiz..den one day,i get to noe ma hubby at ma work plc..he was ma customer bck den..we started dating..b4 we get serious,i told him everiting bout wot had happend to me in the past..he was soo annoyed over the incident bout ma family members as dey din do aniting to protect me..! so we started dating seriously..coz he said tat he will protect me..den came ma x in the picture..he wanted to get back to me..but i ignored him..ma hubby was toO jealous n had v little faith in me(i tink)..thus he owaes quarrel w me over ma bloOdy x..! btw he got v jealous over him b'coz tiz paticular x of mine used to stay together w me coz he was chased out by his parents.. - tis's the whole story..tat's wen ma hubby started b'cum soO protective of me..! he dun wan anibodi to get near me n hurt me..!

the story btn ma dad n me is..he's owaes taking advantage of me..as in he's owaes asking me to do tiz n tat for him..v long story la..

den btn ma MIL n me is..woteva i do,she'll find me sore in her eye..! Wen i stay at hm(during ma off daes), i'll cook,clean the hse,take care of ma son, do the laundry..etc. but she'll tell ma hubby tat i stay at hm doing nuting..like princess lyk tat..she'll bad-mouthed me..but of course ma hubby dun believe woteve she saae la..coz he noes tat i'm not in the wrong..so ma MIL was not hepi w ma hubby n me coz ma hubby sides me..den she chase us out..she got no PITY on his grandchild oso..bo pien..i moved back to mom's plc..wer der's MONSTER..

so now i'm bck at ma mom's plc..tat's y owaes quarrel w each other over other ppl..!

Haiz..!! but now..to me..he oso start to hurt me..coz he owaes scold me over small issues..am i right to sae tat he's starting to HURT me..?? or he juz loves me soO much tat he din realise wot he's doing..??

can sumbody please sae sumting to me..advise me..wot shud i do..i'm feeling soo low n stressful..i hope u guys understand wot i'm sayingn ma situation..ancing_angry:

 

[leey]

For us, once in a month,

see that it is normal.

I don't know why,
maybe another form of communication.

 

[damianli]

erm i hav difficulty reading ur post....

ur short cut is reali short.

y dun u & ur husband together wif ur son move out?

 

[lis]

For us, once in a month,

see that it is normal.

I don't know why,
maybe another form of communication.

wah..u soO good arh..onie quarrel once a mth..heheX..! i envy u le..

 

[-SRI-]

Lis, i tell u eh.. ni sbb la aku mcm reluctant nk kahwin ngan dia..

1st thing - Belum kahwin dia dh sides his parents.. Even after his sis & parents dh kutuk aku mcm2... dia masih side diaorg seh.. u can imagine tk if i dh kahwin ngan dia, confirm aku tk leh bernafas sia........ semuanye aku salah...n i'll be his last priority...

2nd thing - masa dia melamar aku..his sis.. mak aii!! mulut jahat sia.. ada ke patut ckp aku ni tk suci buat ape nk minta hantaran mahal2... kan tk beralas percakapan dia...mak dia lagi..jeling2 aku... fuh!! darah up sia.. sampai aku bleeding..... Sis dia memandai tell me wat to do wit the hantaran... eh2... hantaran kan milik the bride..so up to her side la wat to do wit the $$$...

3rd thing - My guy ni wishy washy... menyampah siak....

4th thing - Dia tu tk de pendirian...mcm lembu cucuk hidung... semua nk dgr kata family dia...........................

5th thing - His sis tu mcm !@#$ .... ada ke patut dia bilang my frens & friendster bulletin & shoutout tt I'm a bitch.... ya'allah..jahat siak mulut dia...kata jer skola agama...

so u see lis.. if i tul2 kahwin ngan dia..some hw i'll suffer too... if yg biasa2 nye i'm ok la...baisalah rumahtangga sure hv conflict..but nt a big one... Tau nk cucu.. tapi aku sendiri dia tk respect........ ha........

My advice to u.. since u choose to marry him.. juz endure... i guess ur MIL pun mcm my guy nye mak la... ada jer nk pick on us.. nk kita dgr kata diorg... almaklum la.. kita ni kan shotgun...

Hv a nice talk wit ur HB... abt lupa buang diapers tu.. jgn jadikan habit ye..hehehe... my mum pun pantang... i tink ur HB tu particular abt cleanliness la... For me, usually ape my guy don like, I tk buat to prevent any quarrels... Yg bagusnye, if dh jadi husband n wife, kalau blh, bila marah2 tu jgn la sampai satu hari... cool dwn 1st den talk nicely..... pas tu pandai2 lah u manja2 ngan dia.. hehehe... it works tau....

if kita yg slalu ckp sorry, doesnt mean kita salah or loser... tk rugi pun if we make the 1st move... biar mulut dia diam sikit..........:tlaugh:

 

[lis]

erm i hav difficulty reading ur post....

ur short cut is reali short.

y dun u & ur husband together wif ur son move out?

haha..i'm sorie tat u can't understand ma short cut..btw,rite now we're waiting for HDB to come bck to us w the queue no.hmM..thnx for the concern..

 

[lis]

Lis, i tell u eh.. ni sbb la aku mcm reluctant nk kahwin ngan dia..

1st thing - Belum kahwin dia dh sides his parents.. Even after his sis & parents dh kutuk aku mcm2... dia masih side diaorg seh.. u can imagine tk if i dh kahwin ngan dia, confirm aku tk leh bernafas sia........ semuanye aku salah...n i'll be his last priority...

2nd thing - masa dia melamar aku..his sis.. mak aii!! mulut jahat sia.. ada ke patut ckp aku ni tk suci buat ape nk minta hantaran mahal2... kan tk beralas percakapan dia...mak dia lagi..jeling2 aku... fuh!! darah up sia.. sampai aku bleeding..... Sis dia memandai tell me wat to do wit the hantaran... eh2... hantaran kan milik the bride..so up to her side la wat to do wit the $$$...

3rd thing - My guy ni wishy washy... menyampah siak....

4th thing - Dia tu tk de pendirian...mcm lembu cucuk hidung... semua nk dgr kata family dia...........................

5th thing - His sis tu mcm !@#$ .... ada ke patut dia bilang my frens & friendster bulletin & shoutout tt I'm a bitch.... ya'allah..jahat siak mulut dia...kata jer skola agama...

so u see lis.. if i tul2 kahwin ngan dia..some hw i'll suffer too... if yg biasa2 nye i'm ok la...baisalah rumahtangga sure hv conflict..but nt a big one... Tau nk cucu.. tapi aku sendiri dia tk respect........ ha........

My advice to u.. since u choose to marry him.. juz endure... i guess ur MIL pun mcm my guy nye mak la... ada jer nk pick on us.. nk kita dgr kata diorg... almaklum la.. kita ni kan shotgun...

Hv a nice talk wit ur HB... abt lupa buang diapers tu.. jgn jadikan habit ye..hehehe... my mum pun pantang... i tink ur HB tu particular abt cleanliness la... For me, usually ape my guy don like, I tk buat to prevent any quarrels... Yg bagusnye, if dh jadi husband n wife, kalau blh, bila marah2 tu jgn la sampai satu hari... cool dwn 1st den talk nicely..... pas tu pandai2 lah u manja2 ngan dia.. hehehe... it works tau....

if kita yg slalu ckp sorry, doesnt mean kita salah or loser... tk rugi pun if we make the 1st move... biar mulut dia diam sikit..........:tlaugh:

aniwae babe..tanx for everiting..i mean sharing ur views n oso bout urself..i'm glad tat u finally open up w me..so i hope u can understand me better now..atau pon leh jdi kwn baik lagi..hehe..u take care k..kalu ade keperluan ape2..u can owaes count on me..!

 

[-SRI-]

aniwae babe..tanx for everiting..i mean sharing ur views n oso bout urself..i'm glad tat u finally open up w me..so i hope u can understand me better now..atau pon leh jdi kwn baik lagi..hehe..u take care k..kalu ade keperluan ape2..u can owaes count on me..!

lol..slama ni i close up wit u.. tk open eh.. u nk i open wide2 ke?? hehehe..

kwn baik?? i tk de kwn baik satu pun.. i mean as in kwn melayu... bkn racist..but u noe la..some mly are mcm minah2 kpo... look dwn on ppl like us.... u too... sure... maybe we can buy bb stuff in bulk so cheaper... hahaaha... budget la aku ni... kesian anak aku... ibu dia bugdet..scrimp m scrimp.. hehehe.. i tink bila aku dh keje nk kena ikat perut... tk leh boros... priority will be my kids nye needs...

 

[lis]

lol..slama ni i close up wit u.. tk open eh.. u nk i open wide2 ke?? hehehe..

kwn baik?? i tk de kwn baik satu pun.. i mean as in kwn melayu... bkn racist..but u noe la..some mly are mcm minah2 kpo... look dwn on ppl like us.... u too... sure... maybe we can buy bb stuff in bulk so cheaper... hahaaha... budget la aku ni... kesian anak aku... ibu dia bugdet..scrimp m scrimp.. hehehe.. i tink bila aku dh keje nk kena ikat perut... tk leh boros... priority will be my kids nye needs...

hmm..bestu kau ingat aku ade kwn baik ke..? jgn kate melayu,cine pon tkde..aku langsung tkde kwn baek sebab smuer pon mcm siak..panjang arh aku nyer crite..hehe..aku da kene backstab ngan kwn aku bnyk kali..so aku jadi mcm serik ngan sedih gitu..kecewe la..klau psl ank..aku tak kesah..
kau nak share ape2 pon aku tk kesah..janji we're sincere w each other..alah..tk perlu la smp kau nk ikat perot rabak2..yang penting kau keje,ingat ikhlas ngan tok ank..klau kau susah..perlu bantuan ke ape..kau leh mintak tlg ngan aku..
jgn tkot..i won't look down on u..we're in the same boat..cume aku da kahwin la..e2 jek beza nyer..ngan aku da pkai tudong afta ol the incident..trying to change for the better la..hope u dun mind being frens w me since aku da pkai tudong..mane tau kau tak suke atau pon malu nak kwn ngan pompan pkai tudong..heE..! i relli look forward in having a gd fren tat can share ol sorrows n joy w me..hehe!!

 

[-SRI-]

hmm..bestu kau ingat aku ade kwn baik ke..? jgn kate melayu,cine pon tkde..aku langsung tkde kwn baek sebab smuer pon mcm siak..panjang arh aku nyer crite..hehe..aku da kene backstab ngan kwn aku bnyk kali..so aku jadi mcm serik ngan sedih gitu..kecewe la..klau psl ank..aku tak kesah..
kau nak share ape2 pon aku tk kesah..janji we're sincere w each other..alah..tk perlu la smp kau nk ikat perot rabak2..yang penting kau keje,ingat ikhlas ngan tok ank..klau kau susah..perlu bantuan ke ape..kau leh mintak tlg ngan aku..
jgn tkot..i won't look down on u..we're in the same boat..cume aku da kahwin la..e2 jek beza nyer..ngan aku da pkai tudong afta ol the incident..trying to change for the better la..hope u dun mind being frens w me since aku da pkai tudong..mane tau kau tak suke atau pon malu nak kwn ngan pompan pkai tudong..heE..! i relli look forward in having a gd fren tat can share ol sorrows n joy w me..hehe!!

alamak...sal tudung lak... eh.. bagus tu kau dh pakai..tk mcm aku ni kan.. tk pakai2.. belum terbuka hati ni..but prayers ada juga buat.tu pun tk kerap ahh..on off..hehehe... I nvr ever look dwn on anyone..sbb who am i to judge..appearance tk impt.. character tu impt..like i said b4..ada yg pakai tudung tapi perangai mcm SETAN!! hehehe...

LOL..susah eh nk dpt kwn yg sincere..so far aku bersyukur kwn2 aku yg cina semuanye baik2 belaka..... hahaha..yayaya..same boat... tu la eh..cuma aku ni tk kahwin...anak bin/bte Abdullah... aku la ibu dan ayah kepada anak ku..:001_302:

Thks lis.. so far i can manage..tu pun wit my mum help... brg2 anak semua aku beli ala kadar...yg murah2..cuma botol susu & pacifier dia jer aku beli branded nye... hehehe.. particular la aku ni....

I totally strgly agree wit u tt friendship needs sincerity...lepas aku dh keje, leh la kita gi shopping for bb stuff sama2.. bawa anak2 kita skali... but wkend jer aku free..u SAHM eh...:tlaugh:

 

[lis]

ehk sorie aku lmbt reply..hmm..ok la klau kau cume leh klua wknds jek..tpi klau nak klua on the wknds..aku bwk la laki ngan ank aku skali..hehe..psl wknds slalu aku ngan femili aku..hope u dun mind la klua ngan laki aku smuer..den kite leh gi shopping..at the same tym kite check out kdai mane yg ade jual brg2 bb murah2..kHakHakHa..!

 

[-SRI-]

i don mind... but i scared dia mind.. as wat u mention, wkends is for famliy outing... ada aku..mcm extra kan.. hehehe...

yayaya...can window shopping too...:001_302:

 

[lis]

i don mind... but i scared dia mind.. as wat u mention, wkends is for famliy outing... ada aku..mcm extra kan.. hehehe...

yayaya...can window shopping too...:001_302:

tkla..die tak kesah..klau outing biase jek die tak kesah..melainkan aku ade planning lain la..hmm..bestu nie klau kau pth alek keje..kau keje ape..? still the same job or..

 

[Ting]

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i dun understand melayu.
i dunno wat u guys talkin abt.
how to comment~~~!
T.T
boooooooo~

 

[lis]

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i dun understand melayu.
i dunno wat u guys talkin abt.
how to comment~~~!
T.T
boooooooo~

hmm..u no nid to comment on wot me n SRI talking at..it's nuting btn us..but u can comment on ma 1st post..:tlaugh:

 

[Ting]

hmm..u no nid to comment on wot me n SRI talking at..it's nuting btn us..but u can comment on ma 1st post..:tlaugh:

i think, that, maybe u n ya hubby need a talk n take some time off each other.
bcos, both of u are so angry now.
n if possible, maybe u n ya hubby might wanna move out.
there's this chinese saying " being together is easy, but living together is difficult."
it's something very true.
n since both sides alr hv bad blood running, its best to conflicts to a minimum.

 

[prettybb]

to be frank, We are husband and wife. We stay togather,sleep togather,eat,go out... so definitely will have misundersandings. it is how you handle it and improve it. for me, i will take it easy when he mad. when im mad he will keep quiet. after cool down, WE then talk and then forgive each other. and most impot is whatever happens already happened. no need to bring back this matter to new chapter of ''misunderstanding'' if any... and to improve try not to repeat things that going to make ur spouse mad. vice-versa. as to avoid another quarrelling again..

of cos, WE hate quarrelling. but this is life. there's always ups and down.
nothing is perfect.

a good talk helps alot. both of us must admit our mistakes.

 

[mmy_lizz]

eh sri n lis.. korang flood ni thread.. hahah..

bebual adeik -beradik ehh.. orang lain sume move over? hahaha..

well, one thing i smile abt girls like u. young n unmarried/married.. u guys still usaha yr way to be better.. nak jgk look aft babies yg tak bersalah tu..

lain la mcm adik ipar aku!! mcm siakk! beranak jer tahu.. pas tu takde responsibility.

 

[SH74]

b4 marriage, me n hubby alw quarrel over the tiniest matter. but aft marriage, a lot better. think 'cause b4 marriage, quarrel, not happy, can dun c each other. not so miserable.

but now married, stay together, quarrel liao, also mus c each other day n nite, sleep on same bed. more miserable. moreover, got bb. if quarrel, v diffi to communicate.

 

[-SRI-]

eh sri n lis.. korang flood ni thread.. hahah..

bebual adeik -beradik ehh.. orang lain sume move over? hahaha..

well, one thing i smile abt girls like u. young n unmarried/married.. u guys still usaha yr way to be better.. nak jgk look aft babies yg tak bersalah tu..

lain la mcm adik ipar aku!! mcm siakk! beranak jer tahu.. pas tu takde responsibility.

lol... insya'allah i wont be like her... kesian anak aku..