I'm so tired

[Fisherman's Friend]

Dear Mummies, i'm so so tired!! Physically and mentally...i have 2 kids and though i have a maid helping me to take care, the maid is full of problems and i'm in the middle of changing her now... I have to work, have to worry for my kids, have to worry about their simplest things like the food they eat to things like the preschool i'm enroling them.

But my hubby seems totally ignorance to all! He even has to ask me what diaper brand they are using...:err:

Last night he didn't come home the whole night, i called him but his hp was off. I was so worried, scared that he may be in some kinds trouble, was still contemplating if I should take urgent leave. In the end i didn't coz i just started on the job not too long ago and if my hb got into some trouble, at least i'll still have a job to support my kids. In the end, he called me at ard 9+ saying he was drunk last night and spent a night at one of his friend's place. This is not the 1st time already, earlier on i chose to believe him, but when it happened on and off, its hard to force myself to believe anymore.

His friend (the one whom he stayed overnight with) called to explain that coz he was feeling down, thats y my hb accompanied him. (those brotherhood thingy -_-)
But i really very tired le...i think i should start planning for myself and my kids. I dun wish to wait for things to happen le then gan jiong...

Haiz...i had been asking myself why did i choose to marry him in the 1st place and got myself into such shit? Yes, im grateful that i have 2 beautiful children coz of thisdecision, but i felt so miserable! I felt there's no one i can share my woes with! Friends aside, isn't a hb supposed to be ur soulmate? Someone to share your upsd and downs with??

 

[MsKoh1973]

sad to hear what happen to you, be strong.

In my hse, I am the decision maker, my husband also can't decide what brand of diaper to buy, what fruits etc, I amthe one who tell him.

Maybe u want to consider have a heart to heart talk w ur hubby, is there something which happens outside ( like his job, or his parents or siblings) that he didn't want to tell u cos scare u worry?

Is better to find out the truth then to guess and make the wrong decision.

Regardless of what happen, you should always save up some money for yourself and kids.

 

[angiebaby]

same as msKoh, my hub also will just follow orders and will never made decision himself, but now i think the problem is he seems put himself outside the family, maybe you should talk to him why he is avoiding coming hm, ask him dun give bullshit like drunk or what, if you are drunk, you wont be smart till off your phone.

start plan for yourself and the kid, he can dont come back but must give money for the family, and you should start to save as much as you can, and record down monthly expanses for the kid, just in case.

hub should be the soulmate, i do agree, but people will change as time goes by, and love usually dont last very long, get yourself prepared and then talk to him.

 

[Fisherman's Friend]

Haiz...im trying to save up now...i think i have given up on him le...tokimgto him will jsut make my blood boils!

 

[MsKoh1973]

dun give up easily, you already with him now, if u can find out what he is thinking, then life will be better for both of you. I ever saw a 1/3 chart, that is, every time u made a decision, 1/3 chance it will have same outcome as now, 1/3 chance it will make life better, and 1/3 chance it will worsen.

So if u decide to give up on him, things may either worsen or remain same like now.

It is not easy that in this blind blind human sea ur manage to meet each other and married and have kids. Unless he is very terrible, like beat you, abuse you, if not, why dun give yourself and also give him a second chance.

 

[Fisherman's Friend]

i understand...but everytime when i thought about it, it seems really difficult to give him another chance, like i'll think the same things will happened again and i have to go through it all again...

 

[MsKoh1973]

my dear, no matter what happen, you have to be strong, must think for your child.

my fren who planned to divorce said she will not take a single cent from husband, she got no kid, just want the whole thing to be over asap.

I personally think that she shouldn't let go of tat fellow so easily, but she is worry that if she asked for more, the divorce may drag, and she just want to get out of it asap.

For your case, u better think carefully, but if u really decide to do it, make sure u get the most out of him, u must remember, you not fighting for yourself, you fighting for your kids, they need your help.