Is it normal for a father to scream at the baby?

Dowin

New Member
Hi guys,

Just wondering is it normal for a father to be shouting/screaming at the baby's face when the baby is crying non stop, saying things like," continue! you continue! I don't care!" And let the baby cry until choke??

Pls advise.
 

jasobias

Well-Known Member
nope i dont think its normal.If my hubby were to do tht i wld be whacking him with the frying pan!!
 

Ottermum

Member
actually it depends...if it happens everyday then something has gone terribly wrong with this man...in terms of his sanity...he cannot handle kids esp crying ones...

if it only happens once in a blue moon then it's understandable...maybe the father's had a long hard day, feeling stressed n tired... the last person he'd wanna meet is a crying baby...
 

annie

Well-Known Member
he is just impatient.. i dun see anything wrong with that. its character...maybe he is still not really used to being a father. give him some time.
 

STmummy

Member
nope i dont think its normal.If my hubby were to do tht i wld be whacking him with the frying pan!!

'Frying Pan'.. haha!!!

Maybe that father very stressed out?? I remembered it happened to me once.. but it was when my baby was only 1-2 months old.. when he kept crying so much, and I was so tired.. shouted at him hoping he will be quiet and then I cried too...:wecry:
 

apollo

Well-Known Member
my hubby does tt once, and only ONCE.. cos tt time ds was ill and kept crying at Midnight. and hubby was v tired aft a day wk, + we tried everything to calm ds down but he just kept crying.. i gave him a big fat scolding aft tt and he apologise to both ds and me. eversince tt time, he nv do tt again..
 

CanCanMum

Moderator
to me now if he does tat i will find him abnormal, mebbe he got stressed up at work and using Baber as a stress relief ball

but when Baber was still a baby and crying non stop middle of the night, he does tat most of the time so i normally keep Baber away from him by going over to the other room whenever he cries to avoid conflict *shakes head* those were the daysssss of misery....:p:p:p
 

catherlyn

Member
My hubby would not shout at her instead he said to her"en en wat happen, don cry already la. U cried until I also don knw wat to do le." it happen quite often as dear daughter got quite a temper but he WILL nv shout at her n I WILL nv allow it. I think man just cannot handle crying babies m crying woman haha....
 

AugBoyz

Member
i thot this only happens to mummies? :p coz post natal blues kicks in ma. I did tt a few times coz son was having colic n every nite cry loud n non stop fm 11pm till 1-2am :S My hubby only lie down beside the baby n stare at him, feeling helpless....
 

Dowin

New Member
Recently the father has been shouting at the baby. Not everyday, but i just dun find it normal. Will a 2mths old baby be overly pampered or spoiled? He claims that his baby is spoiled, and bad temper, so he just lets him cry until saliva is choking him, and when his wife asks him why would you want to do that to the baby, he can says things like, "let him cry. let him cry until he die i also wont feel a thing."

i suspect is post natal depression. but he wont listen to anyone, and always insist his points are right. and he is angry that why nobody understands him? -.-"'
 

apollo

Well-Known Member
Recently the father has been shouting at the baby. Not everyday, but i just dont find it normal. Will a 2mths old baby be overly pampered or spoiled? He claims that his baby is spoiled, and bad temper, so he just lets him cry until saliva is choking him, and when his wife asks him why would you want to do that to the baby, he can says things like, "let him cry. let him cry until he die i also wont feel a thing."

i suspect is post natal depression. but he wont listen to anyone, and always insist his points are right. and he is angry that why nobody understands him? -.-"'
is that ur hubby or ur fren's one? i feel that the hubby abit too over! and how can he determine a 2mth old bb is being spoilt? they cry for many reasons! instead of blaming the baby, he shd find out the reason. the more he vent his anger on the baby, the baby will be frightened and cry even more!

btw i think the baby might hav wind in the tummy.. if not wont be crying non-stop bahh..
 

CanCanMum

Moderator
Recently the father has been shouting at the baby. Not everyday, but i just dont find it normal. Will a 2mths old baby be overly pampered or spoiled? He claims that his baby is spoiled, and bad temper, so he just lets him cry until saliva is choking him, and when his wife asks him why would you want to do that to the baby, he can says things like, "let him cry. let him cry until he die i also wont feel a thing."

i suspect is post natal depression. but he wont listen to anyone, and always insist his points are right. and he is angry that why nobody understands him? -.-"'
in that case the wife should handle the baby alone, becoz no point the daddy handles the baby like that and there is no way he can coax the baby from wad i see it, it only makes things worst. Not every1 is born an expert in babies, some daddies are very bad at this. Reason can be as simple as they cannot stand cranky baby crying or they are not ready mentally to be a daddy as yet, give him some time to adapt to the changing lifestyle.

my hubby was like this the last time, but it does not mean he did not fulfill his duty as a father. As i know he is like this, so i separate the baby from him whenever Baber is cranky, like carry him out of the bedroom etc etc. Now that Baber has outgrown the baby stage, I can see his love for Baber expressed in a different manner, like he will cover the blankie for Baber in the middle of the night, carry him to sleep in the centre of the bed if Baber rolls to the other side of the mattress etc, but my hubby was very mean to Baber when he was still an infant.
 

STmummy

Member
oh dear.. ya I agree. Prob the mummy should handle the baby for now.

I read before that babies below the age of 6 months wont be spoilt. So you have to carry and soothe the baby as often as you can so that the baby will grow up to be more secure and wont be crying so much when much older. LIke my son now, he is a happy toddler... easily amused... haha! :001_302:
 

jojoki

Well-Known Member
my hubby always shout at my baby if she is crying in the middle of night and cant be pacified.. if i refuse to budge he will lose temper.. "cry la cry la i cant be bothered..." he knows if he use this method i will get up n pacify dd. but that was only during dd was around 1 -2 mth old
 

sharonyi66

Member
Think I will be the 1 to lose temper while hubby will carry baby away from me....

haha~~ that's only when i'm doing my confinement coz very pek chek ma, can't bathe, no cold drinks, no aircon, breast pain, hair oily, head itchy, face look so haggard, eyebrown so messy.....haha... Scolded Inez 1 time only, after that I feel so guilty -.-""

Blame the baby blues... :p
 
well, I think the new father just be stressed, a child's crying and irritation are common triggers for the frustration. He need help
 

Amulet

Active Member
Recently the father has been shouting at the baby. Not everyday, but i just dont find it normal. Will a 2mths old baby be overly pampered or spoiled? He claims that his baby is spoiled, and bad temper, so he just lets him cry until saliva is choking him, and when his wife asks him why would you want to do that to the baby, he can says things like, "let him cry. let him cry until he die i also wont feel a thing."

i suspect is post natal depression. but he wont listen to anyone, and always insist his points are right. and he is angry that why nobody understands him? -.-"'
he needs to read up more on babycare books..

2months old baby won be spoilt..

one of the reason baby cry could be coz he/she is scare, needs comfort, or uncomfy..

the more u shout, the more the baby going to be scare.. the more baby is goin to cry, and the more baby is insecure resulting to MORE cries and wind in tummy then MORE cries becoz of that..

it's a horrible cycle.. for infants, best is to tend to them as soon as possible wen they are juz whining.. don wait until full blown cries, thn hard to pacify liao..

i certainly think it works.. since DD is a newborn, we seldom let her cry, we try to attend to her asap.. as she grows, apart hungry, pain, sleepy, she don cry.. always a contented baby..
 

Dowin

New Member
He actually asked us to let the baby cry. Just let him cry until he is tired he will sleep. but to me, it really depends on what kind of crying. Its a horror to see the father doing nothing when the baby is crying until choking and he still shout at him. Worse is he thinks everyone is going against him. Any suggestions on how to talk to post natal depression male?
 

CanCanMum

Moderator
He actually asked us to let the baby cry. Just let him cry until he is tired he will sleep. but to me, it really depends on what kind of crying. Its a horror to see the father doing nothing when the baby is crying until choking and he still shout at him. Worse is he thinks everyone is going against him. Any suggestions on how to talk to post natal depression male?
for crying out method to work, beforehand he mus understand baby is not crying due to distress, sickness, hunger, discomfort or fear. IF baby is crying out of comfort zone leavin him to cry out loud will not work.

can both of u go for parenting classes or talks? Make him understand wad baby care is all about?
 
how come he got post natal depression??? his hormones were affected by the pregnancy mehh??

is that his first child? maybe the relationship between him n his wife is strained somehow? thats why he's a bit koo koo?

think his wife and you guys must use soft approach on him.
 
Top