Kid telling LIES
- Thread starter Angelmum
- Start date
xiaodaisy
Active Member
but often i cant tell who telling lies leh den both of dem get punished cos i believe both are involed.. example.. a glass of water spill over de floor den wen i come out of e kitchen n ask who did it.. dey both pointed at each other accusing of each other.. haiz who to believe since i didnt saw it so let e matter rest .. abo both get punished by pulling ears.. haha
Hehe telling lies ah, when my younger dd tell lies hor, very easy to detect de cos she'll juz come to u n tell u wat she din do. For eg, Mummy I din eat anything... Haha den I'll ask wat did u juz eat n she'll hv to admit lor.
When both dds r involved, like all others, they'll start to point fingers at each other... Most of the time, I'll b able to tell who's lying. On occasions when I couldn't then both will be punished by standing facing the wall or caning for those tt r more serious.
When both dds r involved, like all others, they'll start to point fingers at each other... Most of the time, I'll b able to tell who's lying. On occasions when I couldn't then both will be punished by standing facing the wall or caning for those tt r more serious.
Angelmum
Moderator
When I asked son hv u packed yr sch bag, he'll say yes (actually didnt)
Told him dont play game boy w/o my permission. He pretended do homework in his bedroom, close door n secretly get engrossed in games. I gave surprise spot check and found. Now I hide it
When I found new erasers (not just one), he'll say teacher gave or friend gave .... some occassions I sensed he lied but lately he's getting very 'clever' so very hard to detect. Told hubby but he didnt really take actions. :embarrassed:
Told him dont play game boy w/o my permission. He pretended do homework in his bedroom, close door n secretly get engrossed in games. I gave surprise spot check and found. Now I hide it
When I found new erasers (not just one), he'll say teacher gave or friend gave .... some occassions I sensed he lied but lately he's getting very 'clever' so very hard to detect. Told hubby but he didnt really take actions. :embarrassed:
mae
Active Member
Hi CP...
I tell my DD to just tell me the truth & I will not get mad...I always remind her before we go to sleep...I wll fisr t ask her what she did the whole day even if i know...then she will tell me everything...after that i will start my moral story to her...i create my own story with animal characters. hehehe
I tell my DD to just tell me the truth & I will not get mad...I always remind her before we go to sleep...I wll fisr t ask her what she did the whole day even if i know...then she will tell me everything...after that i will start my moral story to her...i create my own story with animal characters. hehehe
Angelmum
Moderator
wah ha ha .... pick fm the floor!! During teacher & parent meeting last yr, I ever asked. The teacher said they sometimes give as reward.
Not that I dont want trust son but he lied too frequently:err:!
btw, during my primary sch, I played eraser game. Meaning u try to tilt and land your eraser on yr opponent. If u manage to land on top, the eraser below is yours. I doubt kids know this game.
obscurestloh
Member
Heh heh,
the eraser game is still quite a hit in primary school.
Plus the kids got modified version. Something about stapling the base, to make it spin like the top, etc etc.
but they'll get bored easily then start playing with more esp games, such as maple cards
the eraser game is still quite a hit in primary school.
Plus the kids got modified version. Something about stapling the base, to make it spin like the top, etc etc.
but they'll get bored easily then start playing with more esp games, such as maple cards
I came across this article about lying kids and feel it's beneficial for all parents :
By : Dr. Noel Swanson, Consultant Child Psychiatrist
Lying infuriates adults.
The funny thing is, though, that it is the adults that often
set the child up. It goes like this:
Mother has just heard that Greg was throwing stones at
someone:
"Greg, what have you been up to this afternoon?" [What, you
expect me to confess if you don't know?]
"What do you mean? Nothing." he says, with an innocent,
puzzled, expression.
"Did you throw stones at that new girl?" [Hmm, maybe I can
get away with this.]
"No.", he answers, startled that you could think such a
thing of him.
"Well Mavis says you did."
"Well it wasn't me, it was some other kid." [Surely she will
believe her son before a neighbour!]
"She seems pretty sure it was you."
"Well, she's wrong, it wasn't me!"
First Mum tempts him to lie to wriggle out of it, and she
corners him with the lie. It is showdown time. What will Mum
do? Is she confident that Mavis is totally reliable? Or is
there some shadow of doubt? Greg seems to be pretty
insistent, what if it was some other kid? If she lets him
off, she will have to apologise for doubting him. If she
convicts him, it will be double punishments, one for lying
and one for throwing stones.
Most children will lie to get out of trouble. Your job is to
encourage them to tell the truth, not tempt them to lie
more. That means that there must be some definite benefit
for confessing, rather than trying to wriggle out of it.
First you need to lay some foundations of truth and honesty
in your home. Make sure that you, yourself, don't lie. Get
into the habit of noticing and rewarding honesty and
truthfulness. Talk about the value of honesty, and a good
reputation. Demonstrate that honesty is a Good Thing, and
that it gets rewarded.
Then, when you do suspect your children of some misdemeanor,
stay calm.
If you know what they have done, do not ask them, "Did you
do it?" Why tempt them? Tell them what you know, and dish
out the consequences.
On the other hand, you can invite them to tell you the
truth. This is how it might be done:
"Greg, Mavis has told me about something she saw this
afternoon. I would like to know what happened. But before
you tell me, I want you to go away and think about it for 15
minutes. And remember, we value honesty in this household."
Greg now has time to calm down and decide whether to dig
himself in deeper, or to cut his losses and come clean. If
he confesses, praise his honesty. If, after this, he still
lies, then it is double the punishment, once for lying and
once for the "crime".
Either way, once things have calmed down, talk about the
feelings of anger, envy, or insecurity that may have led to
the behaviours. Show that it is okay to have such feelings,
but feelings don't excuse bad behaviour. Be patient, they
won't talk until they know it is safe; that you won't "blow
up" at what they say.
--oOo--
By : Dr. Noel Swanson, Consultant Child Psychiatrist
Lying infuriates adults.
The funny thing is, though, that it is the adults that often
set the child up. It goes like this:
Mother has just heard that Greg was throwing stones at
someone:
"Greg, what have you been up to this afternoon?" [What, you
expect me to confess if you don't know?]
"What do you mean? Nothing." he says, with an innocent,
puzzled, expression.
"Did you throw stones at that new girl?" [Hmm, maybe I can
get away with this.]
"No.", he answers, startled that you could think such a
thing of him.
"Well Mavis says you did."
"Well it wasn't me, it was some other kid." [Surely she will
believe her son before a neighbour!]
"She seems pretty sure it was you."
"Well, she's wrong, it wasn't me!"
First Mum tempts him to lie to wriggle out of it, and she
corners him with the lie. It is showdown time. What will Mum
do? Is she confident that Mavis is totally reliable? Or is
there some shadow of doubt? Greg seems to be pretty
insistent, what if it was some other kid? If she lets him
off, she will have to apologise for doubting him. If she
convicts him, it will be double punishments, one for lying
and one for throwing stones.
Most children will lie to get out of trouble. Your job is to
encourage them to tell the truth, not tempt them to lie
more. That means that there must be some definite benefit
for confessing, rather than trying to wriggle out of it.
First you need to lay some foundations of truth and honesty
in your home. Make sure that you, yourself, don't lie. Get
into the habit of noticing and rewarding honesty and
truthfulness. Talk about the value of honesty, and a good
reputation. Demonstrate that honesty is a Good Thing, and
that it gets rewarded.
Then, when you do suspect your children of some misdemeanor,
stay calm.
If you know what they have done, do not ask them, "Did you
do it?" Why tempt them? Tell them what you know, and dish
out the consequences.
On the other hand, you can invite them to tell you the
truth. This is how it might be done:
"Greg, Mavis has told me about something she saw this
afternoon. I would like to know what happened. But before
you tell me, I want you to go away and think about it for 15
minutes. And remember, we value honesty in this household."
Greg now has time to calm down and decide whether to dig
himself in deeper, or to cut his losses and come clean. If
he confesses, praise his honesty. If, after this, he still
lies, then it is double the punishment, once for lying and
once for the "crime".
Either way, once things have calmed down, talk about the
feelings of anger, envy, or insecurity that may have led to
the behaviours. Show that it is okay to have such feelings,
but feelings don't excuse bad behaviour. Be patient, they
won't talk until they know it is safe; that you won't "blow
up" at what they say.
--oOo--