Life is so unfair

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vel

Member
I'm so unhappy ... I feel like I'm running the whole family financially and clearing my husband credit card debt . I have to pay so many from my own delivering charges to baby insurance and family holidays trip and yet I still decide to get a car even though my husband was not keen since transport is so easy in singapore . But my own money I dun need anyone to tell me how to spend As long as I always use my money wisely enough not to be in debt . I took the time to choose and view the right car ...... So now he expect me to borrow his bro my car while I take company transport !!! Why got such thick skin family !! I'm so sick of my husband and his family members that he Soo looking after .... Seriously can't his family tell that their son got problem in spending his money !!!! A few times when we are dining out when cash is needed , I have to fork out the cash to pay for everyone cause he dun have the money !!!

im so envious of those who can depend on their husband financially !!! I so feel like taking the car and bang it in to some wall now so that it get to be send to the car workshop !!
 
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diza

Member
If it's ur car, then he has no say. It's yours to decide and should any accident happen, is ur BIL going to pay for the damages?? If you claim insurance then when you want to renew ur insurance, you have to pay more.. I bought a car before I married my husband and even when his side needs my help, he told them I got to ask my wife first coz I'm paying everything except for petrol which he gladly top up twice a month. Don't give in to their side.. Even if u are being termed as an evil DIL, let it be coz at the end of the day, it's ur money and not theirs. Can they help ur husband to clear his debts?? If no, then tell them to mind their own business! Next time if want to go dinner, make sure ur husband gives u the money first then consider going, otherwise forget abt going dinner. If u can, manage ur husband's expenses. Depending on hubby financially is not advisable too coz if something were to happen, then there goes our finance. I never depend on my husband's salary and even manage his salary. I do this to him even before we got married and of course sometimes he feels suffocated coz I controlled his expenses.. I prepared an excel spreadsheet for him to show him where his money go to and how much he can spend. As time goes by, he began to appreciate my effort and thanked me coz he is totally debt free. Plus we both refused to have credit cards. So our only loans are car and house.
 
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vel

Member
What you all say is very right . I'm glad at least there is a place I can just let it out , at least not keeping all inside . I had to let out the car cause the hubby say he want to pay part of the car expense monthly , on top of what he already owe me it will be many many months and the debt will just keep snowballing . It's going to be like I'm paying everything first , kids , sch , life family expense while he just contribute monthly a humble amount and expect to live like he owe everything... I wish we can switch roles . This is just a matter of time before I will go crazy and turn the table . I am just a working women, mum who want to live in comfort as long as its within my means, I dun go after luxuries and I dun show off or whatever ... I dun even have a proper wedding or honeymoon .. What have I done to deserve this burden .. Really ununfair I will make sure that there is only 2 or 1 bars of fuel that day so that they will go pump some fuel .. Give me some returns at least
 
Queenbabe

Queenbabe

Well-Known Member
U really have a thick skin husband, since it is ur car then just ignore them. Why should u borrow his bro the car?
 
V

vel

Member
Diza , yes I have snatch over managing his financial , confiscated all his cards . I'm diligently reading all his credit cards letter making sure the membership fee late payment fees get waived off. I have cut down his card from 9 to 4 . This is a lot of chore , being a lazy carefree person I am who dun like minding ppl business .. it really is a toll to me
 
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diza

Member
Good that you manage his finance. It's really a hassle but ur efforts will be paid off. As for the car, why not u pay everything and get ur hubby to pay household bills and his credit card bills.. To be honest, I don't trust anyone to drive my car except for my dad and two of my guy friends.. My hubby doesn't have a license yet. Better be safe than sorry. With family members like that, if something was to happen, they might just blame you for not sending ur car to repair shop for regular maintenance.
 
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simon73

Member
how did your hubby get into this dire straits in the first place.....confiscate his monthly pay check and give him $20 . take it or leave it
 
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