My mother-in-law, Mdm L rom hell

[peppermint]

I am going crazy! My MIL, L retired one year ago and now she has even more time on her hands to do all the irritaing things to make me dislike her even more. She is such a sly and hypocrite. Never underestimate a 62 years old who used to work as a clerk and always tell others that she is very 'sua ku', in other words 'mountain tortise' or stupid, she doesnt care and as long as they are happy, etc. She would often portray like a gracious lady, and faithful believer in buddhism. She claimed that she prays very frequently but I don't know why is her heart still so evil.

There are so many nasty things L has done to me that I have decided to start a blog on her. But here is the most disgusting thing she has done to us, me and my husband K.

Seven years ago, K and I bought an apartment that is located in between both our parents' house. Est. 7mins away from L and 12mins away from my mum. On the day we collected our keys, we went to check our new not-renovated place. Before we left L's house, we noticed she is all dressed up so K asked her where she is going so that we can give her a lift. She said she don't need the ride as she is just going across the road to buy lottery. She is aware that we are going to our new place but I didn't know she could do such a sneaky thing!

So we left L's house without her. While we were busy checking the house, K's phone rang. It's L who called and she's standing just outside our door!!! Beats me how she managed to pass security. She came in and complained that she knocked on the door so many times and no one open the door. Of course we didn't, we didn't expect visitors and our radio was switched on, the house is empty and there's echo. Er, why don't she just tell us in the first place that she wants to come over?? Guess what? She said she's here to SWIM! She came prepared with her swimsuit and her toiletries. So she went down to the pool, we passed her one of the condo's access card. The next thing she did, she came up to my unit with just her swimsuit. Note that L is not slim at all and she's in her late 50s then. I am so disgusted!!!

So it's time to head back to L's house because K's grandma has lunch prepared. L didn't return the access card to us so I whisper to K and she overheard. She unwillingly pass the card to K and said with that smirk expression that she will return to us lo!

As we drove back to L's house, that 7 mins drive seems forever. She said that she has many friends who stayed outside our condo and that they know she likes to swim so her friends wanted to give her the access card but she is not related to them, she feels bad to take from them. This access card issue went on for months. K has been asking me to give one to my mum ( who didn't even ask for it) so that he can give one to L. In the end, I gave up I let go of the cards. Luckily, we didn't give her the house keys or else it will be more hell.

 

[LadyMsteo]

Dear sis,


Thanks for sharing. And I believe and afraid that many of us sharing the similar experience.

Not to make it negatively. But sis, this is life.

She’s an old lady who have raised your husband. What we do, as junior generations, can we take it in a natural way?

Put it blunt, how many years we wives and husbands can (or have the pleasure) take such “burden”? can we cherish each other more before we started to regret?

Shall we talk?

 

[peppermint]

Of course there are more hell from her!

Two years later, K's grandma told us that she doesn't know why but her daughter-in-law, L has arranged for property agent to bring potential buyers to view their house, a HUDC. Grandma got worried because L is out for her mahjong session and so is my father-in-law. There's only the two old folks at home and they are worried. K tried calling his mother but she didn't pick up the phone. That night, K managed to speak with L and asked if she's selling the house. L said no, it's because her sister-in-law's agent wanted to see. K told his mother not to sell the HUDC since the house is already fully paid for and not like they are in need of money. Moreover grandma just finished her chemo therapy and since they have stayed there for more than 30 years, just let them be. And looking at property market, it's not easy to get back into the HUDC market at a good price. L said she agrees and promise she is not going to sell. At this point, I casually said this to my husband K that "your mother is so sneaky". He flew into a huge rage in public. He is still protecting his mother. He in turn said that I am the one who is sneaky. Er, hello?!!

Then one day, at one of the family gathering, Aunty J asked L if she done with the paperworks. L replied proudly that she signed this morning. K then looked up and asked if she sold her house and she said yes. You should see K's reaction! Hahahha, I told you...she's sneaky.

K was very bothered with it. Back home, he spoke to his mother for a long time. And she claimed that she sold her place for $900k and she needs the money for her retirement funds. K then asked her if she got another house yet. She said no and if there's no suitable house, she will rent this house from the buyer. Full of bullshit!

Weeks later, K picked me up from work. His face was very black and troubled. Then he broke the news "mummy bought a house". Me "ya, ok so where is it?" K "it's the 3-bedroom HDB opposite our house". Me "ok". K"aren't you angry?". Me "I'm expecting that".

For weeks, K tried to advise the mother not to buy that house because it has no resale value and it is very old and it's not near to any markets or shops. K suggested they should look into AMK or Bishan which is again not that far from us. But L insisted that she likes the place very much and it's very near to the Kong Meng San temple which she goes to pray often. L even claimed that she can walk to Kong Meng San to do volunteer work when she retires. (in fact, I don't even hear her mention abt doing her part at the temple now that she retired). In fact, she even promised K that she is very certain she would disturb us and will let us have our privacy.

K is very disturbed by her actions. For months, I can sense K' reaction towards his mother differs from the past. In fact, we were not even invited to view her place. She told us the block number, level and that it was a corner unit. K and I drove over to check from the ground floor. We can't even find the unit which she mention. None of those were under renovation. Finally the house is done and they need to shift over. No, they didn't engage a mover. His dad rented a kangoo van and K and I were the ones moving their stuff. And that's when we saw the house, finally.

 

[peppermint]

Hi ladymsteo, thanks for listening to my sorrows. As much as I want to cherish and respect her, she doesn't make me feel welcome to the family at all. Whenever she is with us, be it at home or even at dinner with the extended family, she would always lean over, cupped her hands over K's ear and whisper. Why? Don't she know that it is rude? I am in fact on very good terms with the rest of his family: the uncles, aunties and cousins. In fact I'm very close to his grandparents and they love me a lot too. Grandparents will always look for me for support, we hold each other as we walk. Even though grandparents nags alot but i know they have good intentions and its for my good.

K is very close to his grandparents too because they are the one who raised him up. Mdm L is always away for her mahjong sessions. But he still thinks that the mother is very pitiful because his dad is useless. Mdm L already brainwashed K since he was young that the dad is useless and she's is the one who supported the house even though she's very poor. Omg, how poor can you be if you don't have to take on a second job, has $$ to gamble weekly, doll up with all the gold and diamond Xmas tree and shops for dresses every weekend??

 

[peppermint]

And to continue, she didnt really raise my husband. She admitted to of my cousin who recently give birth that she doesn't know how to change diapers.

 

[peppermint]

Now I know why L always ask me "how many bus-stops is it to your mother's house". I see where is it coming already. Her 3-bedroom flat is now just across my condo, walking distance - just by crossing a two-lane traffic. Luckily my unit is not facing her at all. K promised me that he is not going to give his mum our house keys. Phew! Praise the Lord! But of course, she has been hinting for the keys, she even tell me that she doesn't touch people's things too. Oh ya, like real. I have bad experiences before. So whenever we were away for holidays, the keys will be pass to my mum who takes a feeder bus over to check on the house. L is aware and not happy of course!! L also said this and gave me the nasty stare from the corner of her eyes which I thought was ridiculous! She said "男家那里可以让女家住那么近."

After staying in that apartment for so many years, and since K is doing pretty well at work, he decided that it's is the right time to look into upgrading. Everyone in the family, including the extended family is aware that we are looking for a new house. We are unlike L who is so sneaky. But L would always try to brainwash K on not to move away. She wouldn't talk to me.

When we sold our matrimonial house, I was very emotional, I cried. I stopped crying when L told K that she now has a lot of friends who stayed at my condo. Most of them are not from my block but recently, she know this lady who lives 2 floors above us. And this lady invited her over to swim every Friday. Wow, I tell you, I'm so relieved that we are no longer staying there!!

Months later, we did it. We sold our place and moved away. We are now staying centrally in Singapore, not Pouggol or Tampiness but in the city. Anyway, how big can Singapore get right?? She is very unhappy but she didn't show it. Instead she 借刀杀人 which she is always good at. She will tell others that kids grow up, have their own world already and as long as they are happy. But behind she will use grandparents as a the shield, brainwashed grandparents that now we moved, we won't go back every Sunday to visit them because we are staying very far away. So grandparents were very affected.

 

[peppermint]

But of course we still head back for lunch every Sunday. But grandparents will always comment that now we stay so far that they also don't know how to visit us. Then L bite back, she said even last time when we stayed opposite, they also don't know their way to our house because we only invite them over once a year during CNY. Wtf! Bitch. She said she don't even know her way to my old apartment.

Then still at the old apartment, we were supposed to head to Penang to attend a wedding. His dad called for a maxi cab so that we can all go to the airport together. When we were all ready to leave the house, K told his mother over the phone that we will wait for them at our lobby C. We waited downstairs for a long time. K called L to ask where are they. L replied that they are waiting at lobby A. When the maxi cab pulled over, we boarded and the first comment L made loudly was "I don't know mah, we on,y come over once a year what!". What a scheming bitch!

 

[LadyMsteo]

calm dowm sweety, do it slowly, we are listening.

 

[LadyMsteo]

And easy, sweetie. This is not really hell. Take some deep breathe.

I am not sure if I missed it, did you talk, i mean L and you and husband?

Just from 1 point of view, your mind's a western one while L apparently traditionally Chinese. So we at least encouter cultural problem at least other than the common MIL and wife problem.

Would communication among you be helpful?

 

[babymoo]

U sure face a lot of shit like me.... It takes time to let hubby noe those shit things their mum do... But luckily I did it... If not cos of her I'm divorcing... N she's bloody happy abt it...
Don worry u r not alone !!

 

[peppermint]

And easy, sweetie. This is not really hell. Take some deep breathe.

I am not sure if I missed it, did you talk, i mean L and you and husband?

Just from 1 point of view, your mind's a western one while L apparently traditionally Chinese. So we at least encouter cultural problem at least other than the common mother in law and wife problem.

Would communication among you be helpful?

Hi ladymsteo,

How should I approach her? My husband, K used to think of his mother as the queen. And of course, that time I'm new to such scheming nonsense, never would I imagine that she doesn't have basic respect while his grandparents who have been through world war, is much sensible and approachable than her! My family doesn't behave like her too. She's so out of this world! K and I used to have terrible arguments because of L. The thing about me is, I would not show my displeasure whenever she aim those nasty stuff at me. For the sake of K, I will still give her the respect, even so she doesn't deserve it. She knows she's not saying the right stuff, because she will then give me that smirk or nasty look. I would go home and wanting to have a discussion with K but he will always kick up a huge fuss that she is still his mother and I am at fault. WTF.

But eversince with the issue of her selling the house, K is now a better husband. I mean, he has always been a good husband just that he now understand my situation, he is putting himself in my shoes. And me, one year older, one year wiser, I will try to reserve my comments even so it hurts me. K knows how hurtful it gets because he will just turn to me and give me that 'look'. Or K will 'rebuke' nicely on my behalf, without even me saying anything!

I don't think I'm so westernized neither is she so traditional. L always think that she's young. She has always wanted to 'dump' a 60s diamond flower bracelet to me - that was a gift from her MIL when she got married. L's reason for 'dumping' it to me because it is very old and doesn't look good on her. She keep saying that it looks old on her. Wtf! I'm like 30 yrs gap with her. Luckily K managed to brush it off for me.

Then there is issues with bags. She gets extremely unhappy whenever I have a new a Prada or Bottega. She will always walk behind me to scrutinize what I have or is wearing. Then she will start her nonsense again, with that nasty look "my friends all say why I so stupid, don't get a branded bag woh! But I also don't like branded bags". Note that she carries lots of Braun buffel and bonia. So one day, we were just standing outside Coach boutique at Isetan and I told K that we get a Coach bag for L, I will pay a nominal amount and the rest K pays. K then turns to L and said " mummy, we buy you a bag. Why don't you go in and choose one you like". L with that smirk look on her face said "I don't want I don't want". As we walked away, K ask her why. L's reply "Coach very old la". K asked what she wants and she replied "LV". Omg, how can she say Coach is old?? And by the way, she's not young! Crazy bugger!!

I really don't know how to talk to her. Simple conversation, she's also very hush hush. Example, we all knew she's going to retire. I asked "oh ma, when's your last day of work then?". She think for a while and replied "soon, soon". Even when K, her son ask her, she will say the same thing. I don't know why is it so secretive. Then within the next week, she stopped going to work already. Hiyo, why so secretive? Every week, K will ask her how are things, what she's going to do when she retires, etc. Her short reply "I got things to do lo". Like she will never tell or talk to us about her going away to Genting or Star Cruise. K will only find out from grandparents when he calls back every night. On the other hand, she would always want to know to the details about us, or my family.

How to talk? Sigh.

 

[peppermint]

U sure face a lot of shit like me.... It takes time to let hubby noe those shit things their mum do... But luckily I did it... If not cos of her I'm divorcing... N she's bloody happy abt it...
Don worry u r not alone !!

Hi babymoo, Yes, I'm so glad that K now understand his mother's nonsense. Luckily his grandparents are not like that and I get on very well with them. And I'm so glad I moved. The thing I pray that she's not going to move any closer to us. The reason she move last time was because of Kong Meng San temple. I wonder what other reason she will give next.

I keep telling myself that she wants me and k to go separate ways, that's when she's happy. I mean, why are our MILs like that?? Shouldn't they give us the blessings and wish that their sons are well look after by their partners? I told K that. Hahhahah. He kept quiet. Now, I just focus on being a good wife, look after K and myself. L doesn't long for grandchildren and she tell others that she will not be so stupid to look after them, she wants to enjoy her old age. News travelled back to my ears. Well, neither do I want her to look after them, I don't need her to brainwash my children. We are hoping to have a dragon baby next year. I wonder what's L's reaction when we have a baby. Hahahha

 

[peppermint]

Some of the things she has done to me in the past. * You tell me, if I am sensitive or she is ill-mannered. K's lame excuse is that mummy is not highly-educated. Well, his grandparents who didn't even have proper education during those days, behaves way much better than her! And if she's not educated, how did she even land herself a clerical job in the stat board??

Callus Foot File
The boyfriend has dead skin at his feet and I got him a Manicure Callus Foot*File from Watson's.* If I am not wrong, it cost less than sgd10.* Anyway, the issue here is
not with the money.**I left the foot file in the boyfriend's cupboard.*

We return home one evening, and there she was, sitting on the floor in the living room, happily scraping away her dead skin.* She didn't even tell us that she got that from his cupboard or at least ask for permission to use.*No shame!

The foot file then find it's way back to the cupboard after that.* But every now and then, the foot file will be busy working its way up at her feet.

One day, she has the cheek to tell us or specifically to me that the handle of the file broke, so she threw it away.* Wait*a minute!* So am I suppose to replace it for you??? No shame again!* Of course I didn't. Why should I??

Gillette Sensor Ladies Shaver
I use this during my shower, so obviously, I should leave this in the common bathroom.* It was placed*neatly up above the shelf at a corner together with my shampoo and conditioner.* It didn't occur to me that my shaver is wet every morning even before I use it.* But*I noticed it one day*and immediately stop.* At first, I though it was the grandparents who uses it because we share that toilet,*his mother has her toilet in her master bedroom.*

Not until one morning, when I was about to go to the toilet, his mother came out from her bedroom and in her hand was the wet shaver!!* Again, without shame, she told me that she is done with it, and I can use it.**My reply "Aunty, if you want, you can take it.* I can buy another one".* Guess this is the only time I 'rebuke' her as she wasn't*pleased with my response.* Her facial expression changed immediately, she is unhappy.* Of course, I threw that away and bought a new one.* But I have to bring it back to the bedroom after each use and hide it in between my clothes when it is dried.

Her World Bridal Magazine
He proposed and we are getting married!* So all the works, the hunt for a house, a wedding banquet, etc.

Let's start with the magazine.* Of course every girl will head out to grab a copy of any bridal magazine.* I*bought a copy of Her World, brought it back to his place and since I have no time to read it, I left it in the cupboard, right underneath my pile of neatly folded clothes.

Surprise surprise!* One night me and the boyfriend got back from an outing at about 11pm, and I am in the mood to do some research for the wedding.* Guess what??* The magazine is no longer there!* I told the boyfriend to check if his mother has took it and he said it is too late now to go into mummy's room.* The next morning, I saw his mother and no, she didn't say anything about the magazine at all!* No shame again!* So I asked, "Aunty is my Her World magazine with you?"* She replied with shamlessly, "Oh yes, it is on my dressing table now, I wanted to see what bridal gowns are there now", she then pass the magazine to me.*

Hello!!* The magazine is in the cupboard, underneath my clothes, how did you even find it and how could you even take it away without permission??* That unless the magazine is left lying on the study table or elsewhere, I have nothing to say, but...

 

[babymoo]

My story- in brief- and this is only part of it...

Doing a thousand things is nothing compared to just a mum who raise him for 23yrs and treating him like a money tree, always giving him overnite food, dress him with pasa malam clothes, nothing presentable in his wardrobe, spoilt bed and 5 years pillow without changing a decent one for him. fancy feeding him with coco crunch when he is having high fever, using wet cold cloth on him instead of fever strips just cos she pinch on the $$.

when being with him, just cos he is a innocent boy and mummy's boy telling mummy everything he noe causes me to get qnsing by his mum abt my ex bf. asking me if i will go back to my ex if he come back to me blah blah blah.......(is like none of her biz)

changing the wardrobe of his just cos his mum doesnt care more and giving him pasa malam clothes and he do not have any decent clothes in wardrobe. all clothes i got r all staff purchases from (gio, Baleno, s&k .....) yet his mum complained im a spendthrift and waste $$....( for who?? who benefit??) the moment i changed the pillow.........his mum commented "everything oso change.....sooner or later snatch away my son" i torelate every single thing....swallow my pride and hold on......nv even once argue or quarrel with his mum.....yet his mum complained behind my back....just to gain her son back...." she tok back to me" ( i was thinking WTF)

when he bought the wedding rings......his mum confronted him.....saying that we did not get her ack first before we get anything. she went to open a fix deposit and getting him to put $300 inside every mth.....in the end when matured $$ goes to her yet having the cheek to say " mummy no $$ cannot help u on ur wedding" yet....she got $$ herself to go n change her bloody car.

when we wanna buy a car.....she goes " U cannot afford one" when we wanna buy a house she goes again " U cannot afford a house" ( i was thinking...both of us r working why cant we?? ) reasons are....she manage to hoax him to adding his name into her flat.....don wanna his name out......he is paying for their car......dun wanna to pay themselves.... car he pay.....yet.......mon - fri daddy use....sat sun if mummy or elder brother wanna use....they have the privilege which i dont.....even we use the car....its always empty tank and we got to top tank 100%....(gd deal hor )

when we gt our house preparing for wedding....everything we paid on our own ...going on bank loans all tt.....after getting our bridal rm set up....chinese tradition.....born in yr of tiger cannot go in.....yet.....nosy monster popped her head in......(part of reason im nt pregnant till nw thanks to her ) thinkin she SO GD to offer to buy red wine....we let her handle. asking her hw many she bought.....she say 4 boxes....asking her 1 box hw many? she ans a dozen....assuming total 48 (enuff)

wedding tt day.......shocked of my life....knowing......only gt 24 bottles and best thing.....before the banquet everything finish....and......BEST.....we pay to buy somemore and she knew we paid.....nv pay us back at all.....and EVEN BEST thing happen.....leftover martell.....into her pocket......wishfully thinking tt everything well end......but .....im wrong..........

 

[peppermint]

My story- in brief- and this is only part of it...

Doing a thousand things is nothing compared to just a mum who raise him for 23yrs and treating him like a money tree, always giving him overnite food, dress him with pasa malam clothes, nothing presentable in his wardrobe, spoilt bed and 5 years pillow without changing a decent one for him. fancy feeding him with coco crunch when he is having high fever, using wet cold cloth on him instead of fever strips just cos she pinch on the $$.

when being with him, just cos he is a innocent boy and mummy's boy telling mummy everything he know causes me to get qnsing by his mum about my ex bf. asking me if i will go back to my ex if he come back to me blah blah blah.......(is like none of her biz)

changing the wardrobe of his just cos his mum doesnt care more and giving him pasa malam clothes and he do not have any decent clothes in wardrobe. all clothes i got r all staff purchases from (gio, Baleno, s&k .....) yet his mum complained im a spendthrift and waste $$....( for who?? who benefit??) the moment i changed the pillow.........his mum commented "everything also change.....sooner or later snatch away my son" i torelate every single thing....swallow my pride and hold on......never even once argue or quarrel with his mum.....yet his mum complained behind my back....just to gain her son back...." she tok back to me" ( i was thinking WTF)

when he bought the wedding rings......his mum confronted him.....saying that we did not get her ack first before we get anything. she went to open a fix deposit and getting him to put $300 inside every month.....in the end when matured $$ goes to her yet having the cheek to say " mummy no $$ cannot help you on your wedding" yet....she got $$ herself to go n change her bloody car.

when we wanna buy a car.....she goes " you cannot afford one" when we wanna buy a house she goes again " you cannot afford a house" ( i was thinking...both of us r working why cant we?? ) reasons are....she manage to hoax him to adding his name into her flat.....dont wanna his name out......he is paying for their car......dont wanna to pay themselves.... car he pay.....yet.......mon - fri daddy use....sat sun if mummy or elder brother wanna use....they have the privilege which i dont.....even we use the car....its always empty tank and we got to top tank 100%....(good deal )

when we gt our house preparing for wedding....everything we paid on our own ...going on bank loans all that.....after getting our bridal rm set up....chinese tradition.....born in yr of tiger cannot go in.....yet.....nosy monster popped her head in......(part of reason im not pregnant till now thanks to her ) thinkin she SO good to offer to buy red wine....we let her handle. asking her hw many she bought.....she say 4 boxes....asking her 1 box hw many? she ans a dozen....assuming total 48 (enuff)

wedding that day.......shocked of my life....knowing......only gt 24 bottles and best thing.....before the banquet everything finish....and......BEST.....we pay to buy somemore and she knew we paid.....never pay us back at all.....and EVEN BEST thing happen.....leftover martell.....into her pocket......wishfully thinking that everything well end......but .....im wrong..........

Omg! Our MIL are so unlike, no kidding! She is born in the year of the Tiger? Mine is.

The car incident is similar. But that's what his dad will do to us. Borrow K's car to go 'cheong'at old men's club and return with empty tank and low cash card value and dirty car. Anyway, L doesn't have a driving license so no excuse for her to use. What's worst, she gets extremely crazy when K bought me a car. So K has his own, and me another car. She was jumping mad! And of course with her sacarstic indirect hints again. K has promised me that my car will not be loan to his dad. Phew. His mother, L has been dropping many hints about his dad borrowing one of our cars, but all these were fallen on deaf ears. K told his mother that they can afford to buy a small Japanese car if they want to. L blamed his dad saying that daddy doesn't want to drive Japanese cars cause daddy used to drive European cars.

Next was the money tree incident. Here we are alike again. I didn't know K never has his Hep B jab when he was young until recently when we underwent the body checkup. Omg! And K told me because that time they couldn't afford it, mummy was poor. Crap! If you read my earlier postings, you were understand why I say she's crap! She's so rich ok but she's just stingy and spend on the wrong things like on her gambling and her slimming sessions at bottomslim and diamond peeling facials (she's still fat ass & still has an irritating face) and shes gets jealous and tell me in the face that im so lucky cos i have husband that supported me when she knows that i uses SKII or even when i go for manicure sessions. Crazy or what?!!

And she always tell us that so and so's son very good, always give the mummy money to play mahjong, so and so's son very good, give the mother the credit card to use. Seriously wonder how much money she requires. K gives her 1.5K every month. Not enough?? Don't forget she sold her HUDC for $900K, bought a 3 bedroom for $200+K, and say renovation works cost her $30K (she uses all the low quality materials, it's all falling apart now when she's only staying there for 3 years). Where did all the rest of the money go to? She has many blue-chips stock, many! I cannot even afford one blue-chip!!

This is how she treat her son. K bought himself a limited addtion half gold Rolex watch many years ago. He already has a stainless steel Rolex that was given to him by grandma when he graduated. His parents were very sore about the new watch. Note that his dad used to have many Rolexs and drives European cars too. So life shouldnt be that bad for them.

This is what happened. After K got his watch, his dad went to buy the same model watch but stainless steel and of course not the limited addition, it cost him 10+K. My husband's new watch cost 12K. And K only bought it for awhile, haven't even worn it for a month. His mother, L for many weeks have been coming out with all excuses for K to swop his watch with his dad. Reason: 1) daddy didn't like it. 2) daddy say the stainless steel doesn't match his gold chunky ring. L claimed that she brought daddy to many jewellery shops to try to look for a suitable white gold ring but daddy didnt like those rings. 3) L said that the stainless steel watch looks younger on K than the half gold. 4) L said that daddy has been pestering her to get K's watch and she said daddy is giving her hell. Then why buy?? Its 10k that we are talking, not hundreds. So they bought it with intentions of swopping with the son?? Please note that his daddy has already a half gold Tag Huer watch. I'm not sure if it's really gold but it sure get that color.

In the end, K said he can lend daddy the watch to wear during CNY. Then the Rolex bracelet too loose. So they have to remove one gold bar. After passing the watch to his dad through L. The watch is now sitting happily on his dad's wrist. No word of returning.

The wedding - old wives tales that people shouldnt sit on a wedding couples brand new bed because it will cause them to always argue and not being able to have a child. Up till now, we kids and K and I always gets into fiery arguments. All because L sat and bounced on my brand new bed because it's a Simmons and she never tried it before? I choose to believe that. Anyway, now that we moved far away from her, the fengshui here is very good. Our moods are so good that K even commented that we are always very happy. Of course she's not happy la.

 

[Kaykay2009]

Hi All,

I'm consoled reading all your posts and knowing that i'm not alone with my MIL issues. I myself wanted to diorce my hubby within the first year of marriage cos if his mother and also, cos i didn't want to let her have that thrill of us divorcing, i tahan and tahan lo.

To cut the long story short, (7years of living with her in MY matrimonial house, I'm finally seeing the light at the end of this long tunnel!

Hubby and me are moving to our new place...without her.She had a fight with hubby and threatened to move!! this is what she always does when they fight but this time, she got shocked when hubby said ok. We have rented a place for her to live by herself. Hubby finally blew when she kept making trouble for us when we were selling the ex place and we know that with her tons of rubbish, she will sure complain as we are moving to a condo. Even at the ex place, an old HDB flat, she already had her things stached up high so she will need like 3 condo rooms for her stuff! Plus we really do not need her constant naggng that we are selfish, never think of her etc etc at the new place when we are all excited with the new place.

What i'm saying is tahan for the time being, just feedback all the things the MIL does to your hubby. Sometimes with them its just tryig to show filial piety, afterall, we don't get to choose our mothers. They will one day realise and blow and then things wil be ok.

Although there is no guarantee really, as it is now, my clever divorced sis-in-law who has a place in singapore but is working overseas is still tying to get us to let my MIL move into the new place with us but this time, i very clearly told her that i've finally got a chance to enjoy my family life without her and no way am i compromising again.

 

[peppermint]

My story- in brief- and this is only part of it...

Doing a thousand things is nothing compared to just a mum who raise him for 23yrs and treating him like a money tree, always giving him overnite food, dress him with pasa malam clothes, nothing presentable in his wardrobe, spoilt bed and 5 years pillow without changing a decent one for him. fancy feeding him with coco crunch when he is having high fever, using wet cold cloth on him instead of fever strips just cos she pinch on the $$.

when being with him, just cos he is a innocent boy and mummy's boy telling mummy everything he noe causes me to get qnsing by his mum abt my ex bf. asking me if i will go back to my ex if he come back to me blah blah blah.......(is like none of her biz)

changing the wardrobe of his just cos his mum doesnt care more and giving him pasa malam clothes and he do not have any decent clothes in wardrobe. all clothes i got r all staff purchases from (gio, Baleno, s&k .....) yet his mum complained im a spendthrift and waste $$....( for who?? who benefit??) the moment i changed the pillow.........his mum commented "everything oso change.....sooner or later snatch away my son" i torelate every single thing....swallow my pride and hold on......nv even once argue or quarrel with his mum.....yet his mum complained behind my back....just to gain her son back...." she tok back to me" ( i was thinking WTF)

when he bought the wedding rings......his mum confronted him.....saying that we did not get her ack first before we get anything. she went to open a fix deposit and getting him to put $300 inside every mth.....in the end when matured $$ goes to her yet having the cheek to say " mummy no $$ cannot help u on ur wedding" yet....she got $$ herself to go n change her bloody car.

when we wanna buy a car.....she goes " U cannot afford one" when we wanna buy a house she goes again " U cannot afford a house" ( i was thinking...both of us r working why cant we?? ) reasons are....she manage to hoax him to adding his name into her flat.....don wanna his name out......he is paying for their car......dun wanna to pay themselves.... car he pay.....yet.......mon - fri daddy use....sat sun if mummy or elder brother wanna use....they have the privilege which i dont.....even we use the car....its always empty tank and we got to top tank 100%....(gd deal hor )

when we gt our house preparing for wedding....everything we paid on our own ...going on bank loans all tt.....after getting our bridal rm set up....chinese tradition.....born in yr of tiger cannot go in.....yet.....nosy monster popped her head in......(part of reason im nt pregnant till nw thanks to her ) thinkin she SO GD to offer to buy red wine....we let her handle. asking her hw many she bought.....she say 4 boxes....asking her 1 box hw many? she ans a dozen....assuming total 48 (enuff)

wedding tt day.......shocked of my life....knowing......only gt 24 bottles and best thing.....before the banquet everything finish....and......BEST.....we pay to buy somemore and she knew we paid.....nv pay us back at all.....and EVEN BEST thing happen.....leftover martell.....into her pocket......wishfully thinking tt everything well end......but .....im wrong..........

So are you staying together with her now? If no, did you hand her a set of your house keys? Go buy a car but don't let her know. Hide it from her.

 

[peppermint]

Hi All,

I'm consoled reading all your posts and knowing that i'm not alone with my MIL issues. I myself wanted to diorce my hubby within the first year of marriage cos if his mother and also, cos i didn't want to let her have that thrill of us divorcing, i tahan and tahan lo.

To cut the long story short, (7years of living with her in MY matrimonial house, I'm finally seeing the light at the end of this long tunnel!

Hubby and me are moving to our new place...without her.She had a fight with hubby and threatened to move!! this is what she always does when they fight but this time, she got shocked when hubby said ok. We have rented a place for her to live by herself. Hubby finally blew when she kept making trouble for us when we were selling the ex place and we know that with her tons of rubbish, she will sure complain as we are moving to a condo. Even at the ex place, an old HDB flat, she already had her things stached up high so she will need like 3 condo rooms for her stuff! Plus we really do not need her constant naggng that we are selfish, never think of her etc etc at the new place when we are all excited with the new place.

What i'm saying is tahan for the time being, just feedback all the things the MIL does to your hubby. Sometimes with them its just tryig to show filial piety, afterall, we don't get to choose our mothers. They will one day realise and blow and then things wil be ok.

Although there is no guarantee really, as it is now, my clever divorced sis-in-law who has a place in singapore but is working overseas is still tying to get us to let my MIL move into the new place with us but this time, i very clearly told her that i've finally got a chance to enjoy my family life without her and no way am i compromising again.

Hi kaykay2009,

You are lucky to have a husband who sees and weighs the right from wrong. And for him to tell his mum off. K, my husband never say anything even when his mum is at fault. Not only what the mother said or done to me, but whatever nasty things his mother did in general, K will just keep quiet. I went though a very difficult stage of arguments and fights, yes fights. But life is much better for me. So his mother selling away her HUDC secretly benefited me in some ways. It is also a wake-up call for K that this is his scheming mother.

Why don't you suggest that his mum moves to stay at your sis-in-law's place since its vacant?? Her mummy can help to look after the house.

Did you give her your house keys??

 

[Kaykay2009]

Hi peppermint,

This is one of the few times my hubby spoke up for me!! before that, the whole 7 years i was like all of you. Living in my own house but hide in the room. I stopped talking to my MIL 1 year into our marriage, i don't even greet her. At that point, whatever bad happened, my MIL will say i did it. We had a few horrible fights and then i decided not talking to her was the best thing for me.

Hubby had a bad time cos stuck between the both of us but i stood my ground.I told him if he insisted on me talking to his mother, the end result will be me chasing her out of the house!! That woman also very hypocrite!! Dress up until very well, hangbag,earrings all must match! go downstairs only also must put eyeshadow!! She is 63yrs old lo!! But at home like shit! Don't even know how to do housework. if she cooks, i can tell u exactly what she ate cos sure got some drop on the stove or left in the sink. Boil water only my whole stove sure flooded! Stay with me 7 years she hold the broom less then 5 times. i thought she dunno where the broom is lo but in front of my hubby only she will go take it out until once when my sis-in-law came over she go and take broom ,i buay tahan i tell her no need to pretend to sweep la. At home we don't talk but in front of neighbours she will act like my good friend lo! i purposely just walk past her!! thats how bad things were.

She was the reason why i didn't want to have a kid but so called accident and now i have a 2 yr old gal. During my pregnancy she pretend make bird est for me but in my last few months of the pregnany and i was still mopping the floor in my executive apartment she also walk past me what! Rubbish lo!

He own daughter came bk to singapore for 2 years and bought a 3 bedroom condo also never ask her to go stay with her even tough she knows how bad things are with us!! I think she also cannot tahan the mother!

Sorry for being long winded. Must let go wen i get a chance afterall i suffered for 7 years!!! haha! AND NO WAY IS SHE GETTING OUR HOUSE KEYS!

She is not gonna be invited for our housewarmng but unfortunately, my sis-in-law is gonna be back for CNY and will be staying with us so being so insensitive will sure ask the mom over for reunion one!

 

[babymoo]

Guess wat... My mother in law is the same... She got money to go holiday go buy all shit no money for son to get married. When son in debt no money to help. In the end I'm the one who help but wat she said in the end... She blamed is me who taught my hubby to gamble, controlled him don let him go Hm c parents, taught him to talk bak to parents... When my sister in law give birth... She called my mother n said" u dunno wat evil things ur daughter do behind... Married 5 yrs can't give birth ( when she know problem is with hubby) don let her son go Hm "

And the moment she know I'm moving house, she came to my house to choose wat she wan, even my plants , mirror, wall clock r not spared... Always aiming my branded bags... Saying hw her son ignoring her... Really all these mother in laws r damn shit... Pardon me to say tt... They rather lose a son then to gain daughter...

Omg! Our MIL are so unlike, no kidding! She is born in the year of the Tiger? Mine is.

The car incident is similar. But that's what his dad will do to us. Borrow K's car to go 'cheong'at old men's club and return with empty tank and low cash card value and dirty car. Anyway, L doesn't have a driving license so no excuse for her to use. What's worst, she gets extremely crazy when K bought me a car. So K has his own, and me another car. She was jumping mad! And of course with her sacarstic indirect hints again. K has promised me that my car will not be loan to his dad. Phew. His mother, L has been dropping many hints about his dad borrowing one of our cars, but all these were fallen on deaf ears. K told his mother that they can afford to buy a small Japanese car if they want to. L blamed his dad saying that daddy doesn't want to drive Japanese cars cause daddy used to drive European cars.

Next was the money tree incident. Here we are alike again. I didn't know K never has his Hep B jab when he was young until recently when we underwent the body checkup. Omg! And K told me because that time they couldn't afford it, mummy was poor. Crap! If you read my earlier postings, you were understand why I say she's crap! She's so rich ok but she's just stingy and spend on the wrong things like on her gambling and her slimming sessions at bottomslim and diamond peeling facials (she's still fat ass & still has an irritating face) and shes gets jealous and tell me in the face that im so lucky cos i have husband that supported me when she knows that i uses SKII or even when i go for manicure sessions. Crazy or what?!!

And she always tell us that so and so's son very good, always give the mummy money to play mahjong, so and so's son very good, give the mother the credit card to use. Seriously wonder how much money she requires. K gives her 1.5K every month. Not enough?? Don't forget she sold her HUDC for $900K, bought a 3 bedroom for $200+K, and say renovation works cost her $30K (she uses all the low quality materials, it's all falling apart now when she's only staying there for 3 years). Where did all the rest of the money go to? She has many blue-chips stock, many! I cannot even afford one blue-chip!!

This is how she treat her son. K bought himself a limited addtion half gold Rolex watch many years ago. He already has a stainless steel Rolex that was given to him by grandma when he graduated. His parents were very sore about the new watch. Note that his dad used to have many Rolexs and drives European cars too. So life shouldnt be that bad for them.

This is what happened. After K got his watch, his dad went to buy the same model watch but stainless steel and of course not the limited addition, it cost him 10+K. My husband's new watch cost 12K. And K only bought it for awhile, haven't even worn it for a month. His mother, L for many weeks have been coming out with all excuses for K to swop his watch with his dad. Reason: 1) daddy didn't like it. 2) daddy say the stainless steel doesn't match his gold chunky ring. L claimed that she brought daddy to many jewellery shops to try to look for a suitable white gold ring but daddy didnt like those rings. 3) L said that the stainless steel watch looks younger on K than the half gold. 4) L said that daddy has been pestering her to get K's watch and she said daddy is giving her hell. Then why buy?? Its 10k that we are talking, not hundreds. So they bought it with intentions of swopping with the son?? Please note that his daddy has already a half gold Tag Huer watch. I'm not sure if it's really gold but it sure get that color.

In the end, K said he can lend daddy the watch to wear during CNY. Then the Rolex bracelet too loose. So they have to remove one gold bar. After passing the watch to his dad through L. The watch is now sitting happily on his dad's wrist. No word of returning.

The wedding - old wives tales that people shouldnt sit on a wedding couples brand new bed because it will cause them to always argue and not being able to have a child. Up till now, we kids and K and I always gets into fiery arguments. All because L sat and bounced on my brand new bed because it's a Simmons and she never tried it before? I choose to believe that. Anyway, now that we moved far away from her, the fengshui here is very good. Our moods are so good that K even commented that we are always very happy. Of course she's not happy la.