To leave or stay........in dilemma

[utpai]

So sad, maid of 5 years decided to leave for further study. Now have to source for new maid again. Hubby wants me to stay at home to look after our children, especially our gal. Attending special school now and need constant care.
Submitted my resignation but boss and colleagues (they dont know about my gal's condition) prefer me to stay on. Even proposed 1~2 mths no pay leave then switch to part time basis. I was very touched. Makes me half-hearted to leave too. However, hubby not very supportive about it. He feels it's better for me to be at home with our children.
I myself in dilemma now. If I chose to leave, worry about future financial even though can survive with one income at the moment. If I accept company's proposal, I have to worry about whether new maid is able to give immediate medical attention should my gal throws a fits when I'm at work. :tconfused: sigh........dont know hw to decide............

 

[Angelmum]

I had a hard time convincing hubby the need for me to work after staying home for 5yrs. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed my time with my girl but financially-drained thus, I had no choice but to work. Hubby strongly discouraged cos he worried (still worry) my girl will be ill-treated and there's nobody willing to help us supervise maid while we're working. Even though I mentioned maid do housework for our folks (maid no need to do housework in my hse), top up 3 meals$ while in relative hse/old folks' hse but the old folks simply don't agree.

I undergo those bad days of interviewing (face to face) & sourcing suitable maids from almost the whole of Spore then took Leave to train. I am very detailed on the workscope, I don't hide any info.

Nowadays, maids are getting higher pay, more demanding and hard to please. They are not like 'olden days' maid can complete their contract ....most don't have the mindset they come to Spore to work. The mindset now is to fight/find easier tasks so as to enjoy life (best deal is to take a free holiday, freedom, medical on the expense of employer eg get themselves pregnant).

If you've somebody to supervise your new maid, hire a replacement. If no, try to source/interview (face to face... I don't like fresh maid, can't see), give yourself a chance to tikam. :001_302:. Make use of the 'part-time' offer to work so that you are not away the whole day.

 

[ping26]

Why don't u discuss w yr hubby again?

Personally, if working helps you to de-stress and have some savings, part-time work is an ideal arrangement, at least for the next 6 mth (to be very safe). Maybe u try to source for maids who have experience taking care of elderly folks with medical problems. They shld be more patient & caring.

 

[utpai]

Thanks for all your encouragement. I'm finally out of my confusion state. Resigned first, if 2mths later, new maid can managed, will go back as part-timer. Feel so lucky to work for such a kind company. Even though they do not know I have a special child.

 

[Angelmum]

Thanks for all your encouragement. I'm finally out of my confusion state. Resigned first, if 2mths later, new maid can managed, will go back as part-timer. Feel so lucky to work for such a kind company. Even though they do not know I have a special child.

Is there any reason why u dont want them to know u have a special child?

It is because it may affect your company medical claim?... some companies dont allow claims for congenital 'defects' cos worked with certain insurance companies. Some companies simply give your a family budget to use for the whole year, not so strict and stingy.

 

[utpai]

Well, my company does not have such a policy. We are only allowed to claim our own, no inclusion of family's medical.

Just that I have an unpleasant encounter which puts me off telling them anything too personal. This incident happened quite sometimes ago.......

A co-worker had accused and hinted to all my other colleagues that due to a gift bought by me on behalf of the others for her kid's birthday, her kid was diagnosed with ADHD. She blamed and accused all of us for her suffering. Everyone only knew that I took frequent leave when my gal was young, other than that they knew nothing. Becos of this kind co-worker, they kept coming to me and asked "What's wrong with yr gal?"

I'm very angry and hurt, just told them "She's fine." I dont know what have I done wrong to deserve this. Even if she happens to see me with my gal outside, that doesn't give her any rights to point finger at me. After this incident, I dont share much about my personal matters with anyone here........

 

[Angelmum]

Just that I have an unpleasant encounter which puts me off telling them anything too personal. This incident happened quite sometimes ago.......

Some people just pure pantang or die-die must find a person to vent to make them feel super good. I prefer to stay away/don't touch pregnant women in case they claim I bring them bad luck ie 扫把星.

All my maternity clothes and toys were thrown in case ...... :elvis:

 

[teenie]

the way yr co worker puts all blame on u, i read already v angry, hw can they look down on parents w special kids n tag unlucky to them ancing_angry:ancing_angry:
nevermind dun take this to heart as such people are jus v naive, we should pity her to have such naive thinking

 

[mommytots]

There are cctv technology to help you to monitor your house now days. You may try it for 1 month and see if it works. No harm.

 

[znljubica]

I fully understand the dilemma.
"Always on the child", does not mean to be a good mom.
Perhaps you would be a better mom if you are employed.
A good mother can only be satisfied mom.

 

[AlenaScott]

Good to know that you finally got a way out for your problem......Happy for you....