Preparing Yr Child for the arrival of Sibling

[aishah_28]

I'm currently 34 wks and my baby is due next mth. My ds is currently over 15 mths old. These days he's being very clingy towards me. He's well behaved with his caregiver around and also towards my dh whenever he babysits him. When I'm back home from work, ds wants me to carry him and have the tendenacy of following wherever I'm going. Even my dinner times were not spared. While having dinner or any meal times, he expects me to carry him and place him on my lap when I'm having my meals.

He has onli developed this kind of attitute onli recently. Is it due to the arrival of sibling. I have prepared him by telling him that he's going to be a brother soon and he always sayang his sister by rubbing my tummy. Do any of the mummies face any kind of problems with yr kids before the arrival of another one.

I really hope u cld share me yr experiences as I'm doing this as a part of research for my early childhood education. Hope u could share me yr views soon... Thanks

 

[little_twin_stars]

It is natural for ur ds to react in this manner.
he knows that in time to come he will not be ur one and only. He may try even harder to get ur attention when ur baby is out too.

So this is what i did. I try as much as possible to spend time with my dd#1 alone. doing the activities that she like with her. I read to her books which talks abt siblings, new baby and so on.

Then when baby is out, I try to have one to one time with her when baby sleeps. Plus, when she sees me carry baby she is feel very left out. So I will try to hug her more. Now she is a great help at home with baby. She helps me look after baby when I need to cook dinner, she plays with her, read to her and sometimes scolds her when she is naughty.

But i must also mention that my dd#1 is in k2 this year and the age gap between the two is 5 yrs.

 

[bluechin]

Hi aishah,

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

My DS and DD has a age gap of 21 months. DS was especially clingy right from the moment i was pregnant, even before the test kit could detect a positive. As i was still bfg him, he would nurse more during the pregnancy with DD. Perhaps in your case, give him your attention and the security that you would still dote on him. Give him the opportunity to talk to baby in utero too and have him feel baby. Read to them together, a good way to cuddle him close to you too.

Yes, he would know baby's arrival is close. For a start, You may like to buy a fav toy for him that you would pack into your hospital bag. Give it to him when he visits you and baby, saying that it's actually a gift from his baby sister. this will actually make him feel happy with baby's arrival and dote on his sister more.

Also shower him with attention when baby arrives. Always remembering to say "i love you" to him first before baby. Ask that hubby also implement the same.

Take care and i am sure you will cope well!

 

[lulu_booboo]

hi aishah ancing_wub:
wow, you're 34 weeks now... anytime now...

i've just turned 32 weeks... and we still haven't done boo's nursery yet so fingers crossed, i won't be early!!

you have same problem as me... boo and no.2 age gap will be 20 mths... and she has decided recently that no matter how big mummy's tummy is... mummy still has to carry boo!! also she's still sleeping in our room, so we will have to move her out and get her used to sleeping in her own room before no.2 comes!

but i've decided to take it easy.... i think no matter how much we worry or not worry, she will definitely be upset when the new one comes along 'coz she won't be the centre of attention... just have to handle the situation when it arises... be calm abt it... try to spend one-to-one time with both boo and no.2 and be fair (don't expect boo to suddenly know that she is a big sister now and behave like one).

i was reading a book about discipline and how to prepare toddler for new sibling... they have a very good advice... that is, if you have used attachment parenting with your toddler, he/she will be very secure in your love for them... so when it comes to both toddler and baby crying at same time... you can attend to baby first, knowing that toddler knows that it's ok to wait a little for attention 'coz mummy still love her... it's impt to build the same bond with the baby.

boo now goes to the childminder 5 times a week. but when i start my maternity, i will only send her there twice a week... so that she still get to socialise with her frens there but she will have chance to mix with no.2 and get used to the new addition... also my parents will be around to help out and spend time with her.

when no.2 is 4 mths old and when my parents have gone home... boo will go to childminder 3 times a week. and no.2 will go once a week... so i will get to spend 1 day alone with boo and 1 day with both of them...

 

[~mysterious-m~]

I m currently 7months + pregnant with my 2nd child..
another month more to go..

Once i know i'm pregnant, i start telling my son he's goin to have a companion soon!
he's excited, keeps telling he want a BROTHER...
so i kinda want my 2nd child to be a boy too, so can play with him..

But it turn out to be a GIRL. haha.
son was at first disappointed. but i told him Baby Sis also can play with him.. so he kinda got over it.
whenever we're out, he will tell me to buy for MEIMEI when he sees those dresses. which is sweet!

My son is also very very clingy towards me now..
sometimes when i m very tired, he'd rather just sit beside me while i slp on the bed than to play with his dad. :err:
& he wants me to feed him during dinner. (he is very independent, so its weird that he suddenly wants me to feed me).
he just basically follow me whenever i go when he's bk frm sch.

i've been teling him that once his MEIMEI is delivered, i will need his help to tk cr of her too.
& he said he will
he will sayang my tummy when i tell him that his MEIMEI is kicking me..

i m scare that he will feel neglected aft my baby girl is delivered. so i told my hus i will need his help too....