FTWM who's mom's helping to look after your baby and make baby sleep whole day?

[decoco]

hi mummies,

wondering if any of you is leaving baby with your mom. What does your mom do with the baby the whole day?

not sure if i'm being overly concern, but i have many concerns with leaving my baby with my mom -

1stly - worry that my mom will make my baby sleep all day - my mom insist for me to install sarong, which i did already and she likes to put baby into it to rock her to sleep. I really dont like it, but the truth is baby does sleep in it well enough. and u can let her sleep as and when per your routine. but precisely because of this, i'm worried my mother will jus put her into the sarong and rock her whole day! what if when i come home, my baby having slept the whole day and dont sleep at night. I'm sure that's not good right? has any of you experience this before?

2ndly as i am bfeeding my baby totally. and my baby does not like to bottle feed.. so she drinks very little.. when i'm feeding her, i really try my best to force her to drink more. but my mom will just put her back to sarong again, rock her to sleep then say try to feed again. sometimes it doesnt work, then when i ask my mom "did she drink?" she will say, baby dont want to drink.. full stop. but can't be baby dont drink so u dont force right? i'm very worried cos she drank so little in the day, so she will wake up many times at night to feed. this again make my life bad when i come back from work..

i've not gone back to work yet.. but i can foresee this happening. i've commented about this a few times to my mother.. and we quarrelled about it.. she saying that she knew i will have a lot of complaints about her taking care of my baby.. but i feel that she's being a little inconsiderate by not thinking whether i will have problem taking care of my baby when i get home from work..

sometimes i just feel that might as well send to infant care.. where they have a structured routine that ensures my baby gets wellrounded developement rather than just sleeping

maybe i'm just being over-concern - do any of you mummies have any issues with parents helping with the baby?

 

[ping26]

maybe u get a playyard or play pen. When yr baby is awake, yr mom can leave her in it.

If baby doesn't want to bottle-feed, some mummies say try different bottles & teats until u get the right one. Some try different mix of BM & FM.

You haven't gone back to work yet. Maybe milk-feed problem will be resolved by then. Don't worry so much. If she really wakes up many times, then complain to your mom. Otherwise, u may hv quarrelled for nothing.

So far, yr mom seems pretty normal. Don't think your mother can or would want to make your baby sleep all day. After 4-5 mth, babies start to flip & sit up longer. No self-respecting baby will want to lie down anymore. Mine just enjoyed watching us do things as she sat or laid on the bed.

Infant care is so-so only. Babies fall sick easily. They thrive on individual attention. Even the faster babies learn to walk at 9 mth or so. Before that, infant care can't do that much. MCYS mandates 1 adult :5 infants. If you r worried abt no stimulation, discuss a routine w yr mum. Try out the time-table/routine before you go back to work.

I didn't expect my mum or helper to know abt infant development or stimulation. I got some stuff ready or just allowed my baby to explore on her own.

Childcare for toddlers is quite good cos most grandparents can't do school stuff like reading, craft, waterplay, etc

 

[Triquetra]

I am a FTWM and my mom is helping to look after my daughter.

Just like your mom, mine also encourages sarong. Initally I wasn't comfortable but since my daughter is such a light sleeper, she really sleep a lot better in the sarong. I took care of her in her first six months and she was not getting enough sleep which is very crucial in her development.

You can check the amount of sleep a newborn - infant needs and as the baby grows older, I also doubt the he/she will want to sleep all day.

As for your concern regarding your baby's milk intake, I think there is no need to worry about how much she drinks as long as she is putting on weight and wetting the recommended no. of nappies a day.

What your mom did isn't wrong as long as the milk isn't left outside for too long. Afterall, she did try again. Some babies like my daughter have very irregular milk intake and they prefer to be fed more frequently with lesser amount of milk.

We all have our concerns when someone else is taking care of our babies but we just have to trust and give some allowance. It's not easy to take care of a baby and not every grandparent will want to take up such responsibilities.

My mom respects my decisions and try to use 'my methods' but sometimes I just let her to take care of my child her ways. My daughter is happy and healthy, she is more attached to my mom than she is to me. I know my mom loves her a lot and I feel more comfortable to let my own mom take care of her.