it is with a very heavy heart that i finally decided to pen in here and ask for advices...
after 17 yrs of being together, it seems like we still have to part our ways... initially i thought that things may turned beta after the birth of our lil one, but it didnt...
before i mustered my courage to bring up the "D" word, i wld need some advices here...
Since I got preggy till now, I have been paying for everything, from prenatal checkup to delivering in the hospital, necessities for baby, to household and to daily expenses. He has been out of job and was into online soccer betting before I got preggy, and many a times, he even has to depend on me for his daily allowance.
When i delivered, he finally found a contract job. But bcos he is in too many debts with nearly all the banks you can think of, his monthly pay cant even cover his repayment, let alone paying for the household.
And the worst thing is, there are 3 personal loans which was applied using my name but it was actually for him to repay some of his heavily owed debts. BUT now, instead of him paying the banks, i m the one doing it.
Recently, i was thinking to buy some insurance for the lil one and did some calculations on the avg monthly expenses, and i really felt the pressure here... my finances are REALLY tight... and this is after cutting out here and there, like using drugstore brand cosmetics instead of branded ones, reducing my daily expenses by bringing bread and maggie mee to work instead of buying frm outside etc.
so much so that i cant even afford to get a simple insurance for the lil one... and when i look at my baby, i felt so useless...
You may be asking why am i thinking of the "D" word then... its a long story but in short words, he said he felt ashamed of me and the family... he dont know why did he choose to be with me after the mistake i have done, he said his life cld have been beta if he had left me that day... he said no matter how good i bcome now aso no use... and that he feels disgusted looking at me...
I think enuff is enuff, i may have erred, but i have tried my very best to do things so that our lives will be better... but apparently it is not working out...
So in short, I need to know the following:-
- is there any way to "redo" the birth cert? I wldnt want to have his name on my baby's record
- possible to get 100% custody?
- i dont want to see him ever again and dont want to let him see my baby, is there a legal way to this?
- is it a mus to be separated first then file for divorce? Separated means we can live apart rite?
- i have applied for persoanl loan frm 3 banks under my name but it was actually for him to repay some of his heavily owed debts. After divorce, am i still liable for this loan? Can I transfer the loan to him?
after 17 yrs of being together, it seems like we still have to part our ways... initially i thought that things may turned beta after the birth of our lil one, but it didnt...
before i mustered my courage to bring up the "D" word, i wld need some advices here...
Since I got preggy till now, I have been paying for everything, from prenatal checkup to delivering in the hospital, necessities for baby, to household and to daily expenses. He has been out of job and was into online soccer betting before I got preggy, and many a times, he even has to depend on me for his daily allowance.
When i delivered, he finally found a contract job. But bcos he is in too many debts with nearly all the banks you can think of, his monthly pay cant even cover his repayment, let alone paying for the household.
And the worst thing is, there are 3 personal loans which was applied using my name but it was actually for him to repay some of his heavily owed debts. BUT now, instead of him paying the banks, i m the one doing it.
Recently, i was thinking to buy some insurance for the lil one and did some calculations on the avg monthly expenses, and i really felt the pressure here... my finances are REALLY tight... and this is after cutting out here and there, like using drugstore brand cosmetics instead of branded ones, reducing my daily expenses by bringing bread and maggie mee to work instead of buying frm outside etc.
so much so that i cant even afford to get a simple insurance for the lil one... and when i look at my baby, i felt so useless...
You may be asking why am i thinking of the "D" word then... its a long story but in short words, he said he felt ashamed of me and the family... he dont know why did he choose to be with me after the mistake i have done, he said his life cld have been beta if he had left me that day... he said no matter how good i bcome now aso no use... and that he feels disgusted looking at me...
I think enuff is enuff, i may have erred, but i have tried my very best to do things so that our lives will be better... but apparently it is not working out...
So in short, I need to know the following:-
- is there any way to "redo" the birth cert? I wldnt want to have his name on my baby's record
- possible to get 100% custody?
- i dont want to see him ever again and dont want to let him see my baby, is there a legal way to this?
- is it a mus to be separated first then file for divorce? Separated means we can live apart rite?
- i have applied for persoanl loan frm 3 banks under my name but it was actually for him to repay some of his heavily owed debts. After divorce, am i still liable for this loan? Can I transfer the loan to him?
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