Relationship problems
- Thread starter PatricaLyn
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PatricaLyn
Member
hi, can say "that" refer to sex, I think all this while, he doesnt want to share with me his problems as he scared I will leave him 1 day due to "that" problem, as mens cannot no "that" in life, also to me too. So do think is "that" problems bothering him all while that cost our relantionship problems ?
jacquelinelum
Member
It takes two hands to clap. Try to care more about him, little gestures count. eg, praise him for the things he had done for the family. Tell him you know he has been working hard for the family and you appreciate that. Send him encourage texts and show you care for him.
I had gone through tough times too. the more i pry trying to get him talk ends up unhappiness for both of us. I tried the above and it works, though it may take some time. If your hubby cares for you too, he will response.
I had gone through tough times too. the more i pry trying to get him talk ends up unhappiness for both of us. I tried the above and it works, though it may take some time. If your hubby cares for you too, he will response.
PatricaLyn
Member
hi, I really very care about him as he is my hubby & have done what I can do already, he still the same, don't want to talk about his problems. Regarding about his "that" problem, I just guess / assume only, he still can perform but not as it is / usual only.
Hi Patricia,
I believed your husband will share with you his problem one day. Be patient. Continue to shower him with care and love. Men usually do not open up so easily on their problems especially If "that" problem refers to something very personal. They need the comfort level.
My husband is someone who is very quiet and he hardly share with me about his work stress. However there are times where I can feel that something is amiss with him, I usually don't ask and wait for him to open up. They need their personal space as well. Dealing with men needs a lot of patience. LOL. Don't be discouraged.
I believed your husband will share with you his problem one day. Be patient. Continue to shower him with care and love. Men usually do not open up so easily on their problems especially If "that" problem refers to something very personal. They need the comfort level.
My husband is someone who is very quiet and he hardly share with me about his work stress. However there are times where I can feel that something is amiss with him, I usually don't ask and wait for him to open up. They need their personal space as well. Dealing with men needs a lot of patience. LOL. Don't be discouraged.
PatricaLyn
Member
hi, I think "that" problem getting worst, he again give up half way, ask him why, he say, just dont feel like continue on, went out & smoke, sleep outside whole night, this morning saw tissues paper on the floor, he rather masturbate then doing "that" with me.
both our parent asking me, when I have baby, we married 2 years +++ already, is not my fault too.
both our parent asking me, when I have baby, we married 2 years +++ already, is not my fault too.
PatricaLyn
Member
hi, I already do what I can do already, is just he only, voice out his problems.
PatricaLyn
Member
hi, I dont think so he had somethings else, go to work early & come back late, off day, like to be alone or watch movie alone inside room.
call some of his close friends, seldom joining them too.
call some of his close friends, seldom joining them too.
PatricaLyn
Member
hi all, I find out somethings from someone that my hubby had been seeing this girl all the while he is working outstation .............. he still the same as I mention before, should I or should I not ask him about this girl which he is seeing her all the while working outstation ................. I had been thinking who is this girl actually in his mind that cause our relationship problems lately.
Getting this lady out of the picture, does not necessarily mean he will go back to you.
His feelings for her is between him and her, his feeling for you is between him and you.
If u cannot accept him for who he is now, then u have to plan out both scenarios, life with a shared him, or a life without him.
His feelings for her is between him and her, his feeling for you is between him and you.
If u cannot accept him for who he is now, then u have to plan out both scenarios, life with a shared him, or a life without him.
I believed once you have this doubts regarding this mysterious lady, you will not feel at ease unless u find out the truth from him. If I were u, rather than living in despair and lost, I will choose to approach him and ask him about this lady.
You have to remember that you are not accusing him of having an affair. Hence, the tone that u asked him has to be calm. Think of a more casual way to approach the question to him. You can also find out from that "someone" how close are them and if he constantly make frequent trips to that particular country. Alternatively, You can also suggest to tag along on his out station trips and see his reaction if he is receptive for u to tag along. See if he is always secretive with his hp.... someone told me this is the first tell tale sign...bringing the hp everywhere he goes... Lock it with password that even you also dunno.
Frankly, the lately change in your husband's behaviour do sound fishy but as long as u don't have the proof that he is having an affair, keep the accusation at bay. Don't dish it out until u are 100% sure.
You have to remember that you are not accusing him of having an affair. Hence, the tone that u asked him has to be calm. Think of a more casual way to approach the question to him. You can also find out from that "someone" how close are them and if he constantly make frequent trips to that particular country. Alternatively, You can also suggest to tag along on his out station trips and see his reaction if he is receptive for u to tag along. See if he is always secretive with his hp.... someone told me this is the first tell tale sign...bringing the hp everywhere he goes... Lock it with password that even you also dunno.
Frankly, the lately change in your husband's behaviour do sound fishy but as long as u don't have the proof that he is having an affair, keep the accusation at bay. Don't dish it out until u are 100% sure.
PatricaLyn
Member
feeling doubts & cannot sleep well after knowing this from someone ................ ask him what bothering him lately, no ask about that girl, still the same, silent answers or just walk away .................. cannot 100% sure if he really have affair outside as cannot really see his tell tale sign .......................his HP always at the sofa table, can access if I want too.
PatricaLyn
Member
I dont think so he will tell the truth, he will just ignore it or silent answers or walk away, I know him well enough too, also very hard to talk to him, come back late, go to work early, he been like that after changing new company, like no mood for anything, eating lesser, sleep late, etc. smoke a lot(scared health problems later.
PatricaLyn
Member
yes, he really avoiding me, nowadays we seldom have good communication, even doing that too.