school refusal?

woofy55

woofy55

Member
Hi Mummies

My boy is now 3.5yrs old in Nursery class. He's been attending the same school since 18th months. On and off.. he's been refusing school.. there's some point of time, we talked to him to say that Daddy/Mummy need to go to work.. he go to school... and he's okay and will walk into the class himself. Recently, I feel that he's getting more "sai nai" (pampered).. he's like wanting to be a baby again.

(But when times when we wanted him to know we love him .. we say he's my baby boy, he will say he is not a baby anymore - he's a big boy!)

Anyway, recently - he will just say he doesn't want to go to school again.. and want to stay at home. How can I encourage him to go to school again without resistant? We tried reminding him that he has some good friends that he enjoyed playing with in school.. he will be okay for a while.. but at the school door, he will resist again.

I think he enjoyed our company too much, he feels fine just hanging out with us. He's the only child. I wonder what else I can do to avoid resistance. Should we made family time more boring..? But it's not right, right?

Please share your experiences? Thanks!
 
woofy55

woofy55

Member
Ya... he say he wants to stay at home with daddy/mummy. We told him that we won't be home, we will be going to work - to earn money - to bring him to Disneyland. At times, he will "pyscho" himself - He will say "I need to go to school, daddy/mummy go to work to earn money to bring me to Disneyland" ... but when reality set in (ie. at school door) he will just start to sob. He won't cry out loud.. but he will just give you that very sad expression or will cling very tight to me and if he was peeled away from me, he will start sob louder.

Haiz.. every morning gotta start off feeling sad... but I gotten feedback from the teachers.. once he's inside with his friends - he's okay. And everyday when I picked him from school - he's very happy. So I can safely say he is not facing any form of bully or rejections in school. And he's always talking very happily about his friends.

Today there's excursion out.. I told him last night that today he will go to school, take bus with his friends and go out with his friends. He's okay today.

Urrrggh... its just that every morning thing... I must think of ways to motivate him everyday... *headache*... what else can I motivate him with?
 
mommykis

mommykis

Member
Every child will go through this phase. Keep your communication up with the teachers to ensure that in school he is doing fine. Remind your child that both hubby and you need to go to work while he is in school. Keep your goodbyes short and sweet. Always assure him that you will fetch him in the evening. This clingy phase will pass but you Must be consistent in sending him to school and as long as you know he is happy in school, just Keep the routine going. Hope this reply helps!
 
C

canaMum

New Member
Been there.
Mommykis is right, this phase will over if you are consistent.
My personal experience, last time in other childcare, I try for a year, if still not suitable, I change to other childcare.
I notice in my kids - once the they get used to the environment and has at least 1 caring/loving teacher that make him feel secure, he will enter the school willingly when handed over to this teacher.
You may notice (peep/stay around to observe when send/pick-up) that sometimes there are fierce and very loud teachers that they dislike, when at the door welcome by this teacher and he cry while other teacher he don't, then you'll know even in front of you they are smiling like an angel.
Every morning I bribe him, talk about mummy need to work so that we have money to buy new toys, new clothes, food, milk, etc thingy that he likes.
Told him that he is good boy. big boy. and let him have a gummy bear sweet when nearer to the school.
After weekend, Monday is usually the hardest to start all over again to remind him how fun it is at the school.
You may show him the pictures of class photo and asking which is his good friends, which one is naughty, and other things like what are the teachers doing.
Usually they have pals or fav teacher.
This little mind can be motivated by the good memory about being in the school. So only 1 frightening experience can affected and they remember how scary it is far from mummy. Keep observing.
Good luck and hope this phase over soon.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top