Should i let my son acknowledge biological father?

[shi_san_yee]

Sorry abt your loss... It really sucks to be forced into a decision. Forcing myself into getting married was depressing too, especially into one that was doomed to fail. I'm so glad I didn't marry him in the end; I can think of more ways than 1 how miserable I'd be. I was toldnid be on my own too, and that because of my future, I must abort. Our own parents will never leave us to die, and which grandparent will not love their own grandchild? My parents now adore my child even though he has no father. That being said, my mum did give me hell, but I think I know where she's coming from. She'll never act pissed in front of my ex, she didn't when he came to see my son during my confinement. She thinks he was being responsible for his actions.

My ex's parents take it as a given that they have a right to see my son regularly because of his DNA. what is DNA, other than a sperm? I cannot deny he's my son's father, but he's definitely not his dad; fatherhood is not as simple as a DNA input. It's very maddening to be pestered by him to see the child regularly 'to watch him play and grow up' what bullshit is that?! For someone who told me to abort, he has no moral rights to even see my son, too bad it's not the same for legal rights. I don't wish for my son to know about how his father handled the situation, and I need to think of how to tell him about it, I can't bring myself to look at my baby and tell him his father didn't want him just because I didn't marry him.

I sometimes think about what could have been; if I married him, and I see a life of difficulty, unhappiness, more stress and how miserable I'll be in a stuck situation. Of course all the issues would be solved if I had aborted my child, but now that I have him, I would not have changed a thing. He is everything to me, my every decision is made with him in mind, my life revolved around him, and I wouldn't give that up for anything.

Now all I want is for him to leave us alone for good. I don't need him to ruin my life or my son's. No man is ever worth it if he disregards a life, doesn't matter if he changes his mind later. Once an action is done, so is the damage.

 

[Ting]

IMO, if u really wanna cut all ties just do it. as long as u r capable of taking care of your son, there is no reason why the judge would give him the custody of your son, if thats what u r worried abt. his name is not on yor son's BC right? then u can also use this as a evident that he didnt want to acknowledge your son, thus his name wasnt included, cos he wasnt there when your son was born.
for me, even though my ex's name is in my daughter's BC, but i was very firm to him. NO means NO. he hasnt seen my daughter since she was 4/5mths old. he was there thruout my pregnancy, was there with me in the delivery suite when she was born, etc, but i wasnt prepared to "share" my daughter with his family becos i was the one who gave my all, while he did nothing. so i told him i wont let him see her, wont let her acknowledge him, and if he is so capable, go find a lawyer to fight it out with me. but he didnt, he knew he cant do anything abt it.
i just feel that, since now, whether u like it or not, u still have to let him see your son, either by his request or by the "law" request. since he is demanding more n more time with your son, i think at least if the judge gives u custody, u can try to arrange it whereby he can only see him once a week for XX hrs, under your supervision. at the same time, whether u want to receive maintenance fee, its another issue.