What he really want???

fifilove

fifilove

Member
In married life have up and down... sometimes if we had an problem we share someone that we close to and trust.. I had this problem with my husband, one time I look at his msg and read it.. well I dnt know if its right for me to do that?? anyway i found this msg that he msg with his cuzzin.. saying that he had a fight with me and the cuzzin reply come to the living room.. Die Die ask him to come... my husband reply I can't you know how my wife is... the cuzzin reply make an excuses , or come down to holiday inn, I will finish around 6 am and go to holiday inn.. you want to come or not??? my husband reply I want but you know how she will be if she know it... cuzzin reply make an excuses. ...

what the hell?? what the kind of cuzzin he is.. go clubbing and hotel???:( what should I do?? or what will you do??? I feel so mad, sad, crazy, depress... now I can't trust him went ever he with him anymore... may not know what do they do behind my back.. how should I stop his cuzzin?? is the cuzzin makeing our relationship worse or helping him??
 
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C

ceratoforte

New Member
fifilove said:
In married life have up and down... sometimes if we had an problem we share someone that we close to and trust.. I had this problem with my husband, one time I look at his msg and read it.. well I dnt know if its right for me to do that?? anyway i found this msg that he msg with his cuzzin.. saying that he had a fight with me and the cuzzin reply come to the living room.. Die Die ask him to come... my husband reply I can't you know how my wife is... the cuzzin reply make an excuses , or come down to holiday inn, I will finish around 6 am and go to holiday inn.. you want to come or not??? my husband reply I want but you know how she will be if she know it... cuzzin reply make an excuses. ...

what the hell?? what the kind of cuzzin he is.. go clubbing and hotel???:( what should I do?? or what will you do??? I feel so mad, sad, crazy, depress... now I can't trust him went ever he with him anymore... may not know what do they do behind my back.. how should I stop his cuzzin?? is the cuzzin makeing our relationship worse or helping him??
Click to expand...
I don't understand what is the meaning of cuzzin? Mind to explain to me?
 
K

kylnn

Member
Hmm I think you may need to find out more details.

What is the cousin working as? Does he work near Holiday Inn? What's his character like - the havoc wild womanizing type, or just the social drinker type?

I feel that the msgs between your husband the his cousin is just typical macho guy talk. Your husband is unhappy, so the cousin was just trying to cheer him up by inviting him to join him. Before assuming the worst, you have to check first whether clubbing & going hotel means just drink & chat, or meeting girls. My hubby's colleagues do invite him sometimes to go pubs or ktv, but I know its just to relax and enjoy some male-bonding time, no hankypanky involved.

As for the cousin telling him to make excuses, it's probably meant in a lighthearted manner. Like when my galfriends ask me come out but I might not be able to, they might jokingly say 'aiyah, just bluff bluff ask permission to come out~". But I usually tell the truth to hubby and whine my way thru haha.

Perhaps you can let us know what's the cousin's character like, then we can better assess the situation.
 
S

simon73

Member
agreed with Klynn, Take it easy fifilove....sometime we guys really need a break from the tension and pressure at home.
Have a drink and fun to de-stress is alrght ...
 
SarahGurbuxani-Carpio

SarahGurbuxani-Carpio

Moderator
Hi Fifi!

I guess the problem really lies in the communication between you and your husband. There should be no need for your husband to talk to someone else regarding your problems in your relationship. You have each other and whenever a problem arises, it should be the two of you who should solve it. Act like each other's confidant. Because after all, no one knows each other better than the two of you.I would suggest for you to have an open communication. I am hoping that there'd be a way to do so. Communication is the key to have a harmonious relationship, just like they all say.

As for your husband's cousin's behavior- well as a general rule regarding other people's action: we cannot control them. BUT, we can have a peaceful and civilized talk to address a concern. So in this case, you may want to talk to your husband's cousin and tell him what you feel and how it affects your relationship with him and with your husband. you may also want to tell him that your only goal is to have a happy family. Maybe if you can have this talk, and your husband's cousin is really for the happiness of your husband, then he will support you.

Just my two cents, fifi.

Hope this helps!

-Sarah
 
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