Feeling Guilty

Bayu

Bayu

Active Member
Hi mummys,

My son now is 14 months old. The thing is, I can't get rid this feeling of guilt and sadness in me. My baby fell and hit his 1 side of his head and face last week and ended up with bruises and blue black under his left eye.. I was shocked coz it happened too fast.. and sadly, i did no acted tat fast.. He can walk now but not steadily yet..

Everynite I cry and keep on saying sorry to him eventhough he doesn't understand. And my mother in law doesn't allow me to bring my baby out, and we i heard tat .. i feel like shouting to her and tell her off tat he is still my baby and i did not do it on purpose.. who wants to hurt their own flesh and blood.. ?? and my hubby too.. he was angry but he knows its not my fault.. i wish i can turn back the time so tat my baby wont have to suffer the pain... he is playing and happily playing with us but nobody knows if he still in pain but just ignoring it.

Will the blue black go away? there is no lump or anything below his eye but i am just scared.. And how can i get rid of feeling guilty all the time?? Please help me.. :wecry::tsad:
 
E

Edwinie

Member
Bayu said:
Hi mummys,

My son now is 14 months old. The thing is, I can't get rid this feeling of guilt and sadness in me. My baby fell and hit his 1 side of his head and face last week and ended up with bruises and blue black under his left eye.. I was shocked coz it happened too fast.. and sadly, i did no acted tat fast.. He can walk now but not steadily yet..

Everynite I cry and keep on saying sorry to him eventhough he doesn't understand. And my mother in law doesn't allow me to bring my baby out, and we i heard tat .. i feel like shouting to her and tell her off tat he is still my baby and i did not do it on purpose.. who wants to hurt their own flesh and blood.. ?? and my hubby too.. he was angry but he knows its not my fault.. i wish i can turn back the time so tat my baby wont have to suffer the pain... he is playing and happily playing with us but nobody knows if he still in pain but just ignoring it.

Will the blue black go away? there is no lump or anything below his eye but i am just scared.. And how can i get rid of feeling guilty all the time?? Please help me.. :wecry::tsad:
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my son just fell and hit his cheek. there was a lump immediately and it has been a week and the blue black is still there. i wasn't at home. my hubby and his mum was taking care of him. and yes, it happened too fast to stop. i wasn't angry. it's part and parcel of life as a child. as he explore, he is bound to get hurt. no one can shelter him forever. i believe through pain he will learn not to do it again. of course, we will teach him before that what is right or wrong.

my son also dropped off the bed at about 5 months. i learn from it and put more cushion around the bed. lol! yes, he did get hurt, but at least it shows that we need to childproof the area more than what we thought is enough. just treat it as a lesson.

don't worry about it. your mother-in-law is just over cautious. you did nothing wrong. it's part and parcel of growing up. he is yours so you have the final say. no mother will hurt her own child on purpose!
 
R

rainbow123

New Member
My nanny use Zabak to apply on my 16 months .
Only one day , the blue black turn to yellow and 2 more days and it will be gone .

Dun worry too much .
 
Ting

Ting

Well-Known Member
kids fall and bump themselves all the time.. countless time pin fell off the bed and chair and have blue blacks on her legs and face... it happens in sch too. she n her friends were playing the hula n she stood too near to her friend n got hit on her cheek. it happens, so dont feel too guilty about it.. just keep a better look out on him next time. if he feels pain, he will keep whining, so if he is playing happily, it means it doesn bother him. things to look out is if your child appears or act differently (esp, after a bump on the head) like, unusual vomiting, keep staring in a daze, not active and appear drowsy, or a lost in appetite.. if he is still playing n eating well, shldnt be an issue. just monitor for a few days.
 
Bayu

Bayu

Active Member
Edwinie said:
my son just fell and hit his cheek. there was a lump immediately and it has been a week and the blue black is still there. i wasn't at home. my hubby and his mum was taking care of him. and yes, it happened too fast to stop. i wasn't angry. it's part and parcel of life as a child. as he explore, he is bound to get hurt. no one can shelter him forever. i believe through pain he will learn not to do it again. of course, we will teach him before that what is right or wrong.

my son also dropped off the bed at about 5 months. i learn from it and put more cushion around the bed. lol! yes, he did get hurt, but at least it shows that we need to childproof the area more than what we thought is enough. just treat it as a lesson.

don't worry about it. your mother-in-law is just over cautious. you did nothing wrong. it's part and parcel of growing up. he is yours so you have the final say. no mother will hurt her own child on purpose!
Click to expand...
thank u so much for the advise. i noe there will be more in da coming years. I will try to be careful and alert next time.
 
apollo

apollo

Well-Known Member
dont blame urself. every kids learn thru falling. my son fall and knock onto the walls/tables etc countless times. if we can predict when they will fall, then they will be no accidents in the world alrdy. if his blueblack is still there and u are wry, bring him to a dr. =)
 
K

karoru

Member
yes, pls don blame yourself... just like one of the mummies mention, be more careful next time and childproof your house... my boy who is 20mth old now fell from bed 3 times... as he is very active now, he always fell, max 3 times last week... also got bruises and cuts but gone within a week... i used to blame myself very much too when he fell from bed so we can all relate to you... i cry and can't sleep throughout the night too till i told myself that it is okay to let go... as also one mummy mention, no mothers will hurt their own kiddos... the most impt thing to look out for is make sure they have no vomitting... vomit is a sign that they may suffer from head injuries... this was advised by one of the pd in kkh child emergency section... cheer up and have great time with your boy
 
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