Is a confinement lady really necessary?

nightingale

nightingale

Member
Thanks everyone for the advice! After considering your views and my home situation we've decided to hire a full time CL. Think this is about the one time I am entitled to complete pampering so aiya! go ahead with the whole package! :)
 
edie

edie

New Member
Hello, am on my day 10 of my confinement and i engaged a day cl. Her charge is not cheap at 1900 but because I'm doing tbf and have nt enough room for stay in thus only engAge a day nanny.

Even she only comes from 9 to 6 her job is pretty relax. She only has to cook and bath baby, boil water, make red date tea. I feel that it's expensive but at least I have fresh food to eat. Was considering tingkat but those are cooked in the morning so like nt v fresh.

Anyway, I still feel that it's quite ex. For my 2nd child, I might check out agency for part time Chinese maid who can come in the day. Not sure if they have such things but hopefully will be cheaper.

Night time will be tbf and diAper change which are usually done together, with hubby's help, it's still manageable.
 
WinnieL

WinnieL

Member
I didn't engage a CL, as my delivery period was very near CNY! So MIL did my confinement for me. She read up everything she needed to know about confinement food, and did the cooking. She also woke up at night to feed my girl.

It helps to have a can of formula on standby, just in case. We fed my girl formula milk at night, so that I can sleep. In the day, I BF her as much as possible, but sometimes, I supplement with formula, especially during her sudden bursts of hunger. Or sometimes, I knock out, and baby gets hungry, so MIL feeds her formula.

But agree with the rest of the mummies here. It pays to be determined, and just keep on trying with BF. But don't stress out if you're not able to reach the point of total BF. My girl is 3.5 months now, and I'm still partial BF. She feeds about 6-7 times a day, and she gets mommy's milk about 4-5 times. I tell myself that as long as she drinks my milk most of the day, it's ok. Her last feed is usually formula, so that she can sleep through to the morning.

Oh.. after every feed, do pump. It helps in the milk production.
 
Pinkliciouz

Pinkliciouz

Member
As this is my first child, I do not know how to handle an infant and the only reason to get a confinement lady is to have someone teaching me about the dos and don'ts of taking care of my kid. But I have my mother and my maid to do the cleaning and the washing, thus would need advise, if it is advisable to get the CL?

My concern is that I can order confinement food, and my stepdad can cook simple confinement food should I have any extra craving so I am really thinking hard about getting a confinement lady after reading a lot of horror stories on them...
 
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sherz4628

Member
I think a CL can be very helpful if it is your first child and there is no one in the house who have experience taking care of newborn.

I was discharged one day early from the hospital and thus hubby and I have to take care of our baby gal during her first day at home (CL is malaysian and could not come earlier at short notice). We had a really hard time as we have no experience facing a crying newborn. I was so stressed that I cried on that very evening. Dear husband was worried I have post natal depression.

After a night of baby's endless crying and us trying to figure out what she want, both of us were really relieved to see the CL the next day.

Now I'm trying to learn as much from her as possible so that we would not have to relive the horrors of that first day again.
 
Pinkliciouz

Pinkliciouz

Member
Hi sherz4628, how is your CL? Is she good?
My confinement period should be in Oct, thus please share your views on your CL after your confinement is over. Might consider engaging her service for myself too...
Thanks ya!
 
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sherz4628

Member
My CL is this Malaysian lady called Alice. She is recommended by this other CL that we initially hired but ended up could not enter Singapore for 1 month (customs regulations).

So far, so good.

Alice have lots of experience and have worked as both a CL and a Nanny in countries such as hong kong, Singapore and australia. She is quite good with my gal and have taught me quite a lot of things. When we took our gal for check up, she volunteered to go along saying that she should hear what the pediatrician said as she is the one taking care of the baby. Even the pediatrician said that our baby gal is in good hands.

Cooking wise, if you're not that picky then its still alright. I guess to me confinement food just do not taste nice so maybe its not that she is not a good cook.

She'll cook for your whole family and will even help out with household chores such as mopping when she is free.

Just let me know if you want her contact and I'll pm you.
 
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happybaby

Member
hihi

I booked one full time CL liao. Gotta the contact from my friend who had used her for her twp babies. My friend was sharing with me that CL will surely be a great help esp for 1st time mummy. Others share that it will greatly reduce the conflict between in-law as u may feel paiseh to show ur disagreement with certain practices, if any.

I also intent to BF, but i reckon that first month is very important for mummy to get a good rest in the night. so i intend to leave the feeding responsibilities to my CL since i paying 2K for her. My plan is to BF baby in the day and express milk for the CL to use in the night. In this way, i can bond with my baby and also get good sleep at night.

Hope that the plan will work....
 
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sherz4628

Member
happybaby, your plan should be workable as that's what I was doing. Its really is important for us to have a good rest during this one month as we'll be faced with a demanding baby on our own without the help of CL after this one month.

However, you might want to caution against nipple confusion. After a while I realise my gal do not seem to latch on so well as she has gotten used to drinking from bottle. So now I just breast feed once a day to increase supply and express the rest so that its easier to feed her.
 
littlemoomoo

littlemoomoo

Member
I had horrible experience with this sg CL who claims herself to be very good and has done confinements in US, autralia and Japan. She commands $2.8K and my hubby and i thought maybe it will be better to hire a sg CL since we might have problem with M'sia CL entering SG if we need her earlier.
I din have good rest at, daytime she will keep talking to me, telling me her experience. Taking care of baby was so-so only and she is not very hygienic. The raw food she would just leave them in the sink to thaw instead of in fridge and she doesn't bother to clean up the kitchen at the end of everyday. She is wasteful and also very bad at managing money, she never account for the marketing she does, we ended up spending $1k for food in 1 month.

Also I have intended to express out my milk and let the CL feed at night so i can have good rest but she always bring my baby to me and ask me to latch on and she goes back to sleep. She always give me her reasoning and expect me to listen to her.

During the entire confinement, it was like hell and i was super depressed, i can't believe instead of getting good help, i felt lousy. I told my hubby we had a nanny from hell.
Next time we will be more careful with choosing CL even if they're recommended by friends like this one.

P.S: Sorry just felt so frustrated so must let out my anger here to let you all know how miserable i felt during confinement with this nanny.
 
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Lim2528

Member
Hi All,

When hiring a CL, do you pass them your house main door key? Cos sometime you may need them to do marketing. Also, when she come during the 1st day do we need to pay their transport fee, if we are getting from the agent?
 
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PTB7476

Well-Known Member
i am still thinking should i get a CL and is there really a need for that extra help for 1 month. i am not keen in having a stranger in my house and neither am i keen to let the BB get close to this stranger and then at the end of the month she just pick up and go and i have to recustom the baby to be get use to me

was thinking what kind of help can these CL really provided and will the MTB become to dependent on them until to the extend when they left, they are totally clueless what to do for the remaining days

other than looking after the BB which we can do it ourselve and cooking what else can they do if we have domestic helper to clean the house on weekly basis.

if given a choice i rather give the $2K+ to my mom or MIL at least it is their grandchild and i am ok with the baby getting use to them than a total stranger
 
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fern

Member
i didn't have CL but have a maid - who is very "useful" as there is no need for me to wash baby laundry and sterlise bottles etc which is very time consuming when I am already changing/feeding baby round the clock in the 1st couple of weeks. This is even when my mum helps at times and I have catered confinement food

if you do not have CL nor maid nor any other help, then I think I would suggest hiring CL. When baby cries at night (I am the sole person taking care, at night) during the 1st couple of weeks, I really really regret not having CL! When baby went for her 1st PD visit at week 2, she was so uncomfy while the other babies (with CL) looks so happy sleeping! But things got much better after 1 month, and cos I didn't have CL, I didn't have to get used to not have CL and simply felt that life got "better". I heard of some who felt worse in month 2 (than month 1) when CL leave :p
 
maine78

maine78

Member
PTB7476 said:
i am still thinking should i get a CL and is there if given a choice i rather give the $2K+ to my mom or mother in law at least it is their grandchild and i am ok with the baby getting use to them than a total stranger
Click to expand...
If your mum or mil is able to help you during the day, it makes a whole of difference then handling the bb alone 24hrs.
 
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sassylady

Member
as you have just given birth, you need to rest as well. so it's better if there is somebody taking after the baby during the day where you can rest while the baby is being taken care of.

if your mum or mil is able to help, then you wouldnt have to get a cl.

for food wise, you can simply get those confinement recipe books and ask your mum/mil cook for you. it's really simple and after cooking can simply just add a dash of the waist tonic.

that's what i did during my last confinement. and also i think it would be safer to let your own family take care of the bb. wont know what the cl is thinking sometimes.
 
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lovelymother

Member
it is difficult to find a good confinement lady these days.

if you can find a reliable one, then please employ her. its best to have somebody who knows what to do during confinement.

my mil used to be a confinement lady so she helped me during my confinement period. simple cooked dishes and i took supplements like the waist tonic. nothing fancy as i told her i dont want her to be tired out by taking care of me.
 
stressfulbee

stressfulbee

New Member
Hey mummie here

Call this S'pore non stay CF lady, she honest & nice, more than 10yrs experience, great cook wif different CF food on 28days & tonic soup.

I had try her twice & recommended to my all my frd, they say her cooking is very nice till they finish every meal she cook...

Call her at HP: 98476976
 
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