Managing Aggressive Behavior in Children


Just like their physical development, children’s mental development needs time to mature. Hence, during their growing process, children will often show a roller-coaster of behavior which may include aggressiveness; be it hitting, biting or yelling. At tender age, children may not know what is considered acceptable behavior or even if they do, they may still test boundaries.

When children reveal any unacceptable behavior, it is our duty as a caregiver to manage them. Given good parenting skills with proper advice, it can help to reduce bad behavior. On the other hand, if the aggressiveness is left unsupervised, children may believe that it is ok to continue to be aggressive. So, you can fathom why some children are well behaved at the age of 2 while others still misbehaves at the age of 8!

Here are some tips on how to manage aggressiveness in children:

Reduce Exposure to Violence
So, where do you think the children learn their aggressive behavior from? Could it be you, the TV, older sibling or the boy next door? Whichever it could be, you will have to minimize the exposure of your children to this violence. Children pick up very fast and they may imitate others who hits, bites or screams. You may also want to read more from the Happy Child Guide and how children’s diet, TV, sleep and exercise can influence your child’s behavior.

Set Limits and Take Immediate Action
So what happens that your children are already displaying aggressiveness? Then you have to start to set rules immediately. Also, bear in mind what you need to do if the rules are broken. Would you take away privileges, time-out or ground them? What kind of privileges do you think you can take away? Remember to match the punishment to the crime. More often than not, some parents would delay in taking action. If you are busy paying your bills online, you simply need to logoff and handle your biting child first, needn’t you?

Instill Self Control
If your child raises his hands and wants to hit the next time, ask him to put his hands down immediately. You can explain to him about controlling himself and an alternative way to express himself if he gets upset. For eg, if someone snatches his toys, he doesn’t have to hit or bite, simply ask for it back and advise the other child not to snatch.

Stop Your Spanking
It takes some patience to parent. Spanking is simply the easy way out in venting your frustration. Spanking instills fear since your child will be focusing on your rod and not your teaching. If you ever need to spank, do not use a rod and never ever hit on the face. Explain why you need to spank to educate your child’s that a certain behavior is unacceptable. Even so, spanking should not be made as a discipline method. Read more from Total Transformation Program which empowers parents to deal with the most difficult children without resorting to spanking.

Justina Wang