Am I immatured n unreasonable? Shld I ask him to pay?

[-SRI-]

To be honest, i still luvs my man eventhough i mad at him for choosing his parents than me n bb.. BUT... i nvr habours such tots tt he'll come back to me.. cz i rather focus wit my pregnancy n i noe it wont happen one la.. I tink ur fren hv high hopes on him.... haiz... i noe its nt easy to forget ur luvs ones even if they hv tortured or hurt u... but nvr ever put high hopes on them..if nt ltr sure we suffer in the end... the rest juz leave it on God hands...

 

[LoVeS]

yalor...me too....i nvr hv such tots since the day he said he don wanna marry me n his family is much more impt than me n bb...but i pity cheekprincess fren...so drastic..haiz...till commit sucide..haiz...den bb alone... so sad... who take care of bb nw?

i'll nvr ever commit suicide juz bcz of him..my life very precious one..nw gt bb even more precious..if i die..who going to take care of my bb... no way i'll give him a chance to hv my bb lor.... its nt worth it to die for him.. ha.. nt worth it at all man...................................................

for me i pity her frd's bb nt her frd. Sumhow i feel tt her frd didnt really tink properly if she can handle the responsible by herself or nt. She already choose to continue b wif tt kind of guy then she has to accept the fact he will continue like tt BUT yet she cant n vent anger on the bb which the bb is so innocent n didnt do anything wrong.

 

[LoVeS]

When ur think ur stillin love, when you still love the man alot, noting goes into ur head.. no matter what anyone says or do, she stills loves him. I was at my wits ends too but what can i do?

She loves him then wat abt the bb?? Wat did the bb done wrong to deserve his/her mom to vent anger on him/her.

 

[-SRI-]

for me i pity her frd's bb nt her frd. Sumhow i feel tt her frd didnt really tink properly if she can handle the responsible by herself or nt. She already choose to continue b wif tt kind of guy then she has to accept the fact he will continue like tt BUT yet she cant n vent anger on the bb which the bb is so innocent n didnt do anything wrong.

haiz..yalor...shld vent the anger to the father nt to the bb... ppl told me to abort cz he out of sudden don wanna marry me... but i rather "abort" the father than abort my bb... bb is obviously part of me..whereas he's nt...so why shld i abort my flesh n blood? why shld i kill it when i luv it so much? why shld i abort juz bcz he cant be wit me? n why shld i go thru all tis abortion thingy like the side effects n he juz pay for the abortion fees??

Ytd visit him..he was shocked why i visit him n hw i noe he has been hospitalised.. i tink he meant after all he did to me n bb why i still come n visit him.. dunno why when i watched tv he keep looking at me... when i asked.. he said nth... he wanna take a look at my tummy if it big oredi or nt.. he told me its big oredi..duh!! of course big..u hv nt seen me for a mth plus..nw i 4 mths...i dunno why he wanna look... told me to take care n go take breakfast cz i hv nt take it...frens said he is weird..when he sick he'll tell me.. hahaha... which i myself nt sure why...overall... the visiting is alrite.. he still can joke2... still the same.. told him oredi tt i wont abort.. u can lead ur lives n i lead mine.. i noe our bb will bring happiness to me.. i don habours any tots of being wit u when u make ur stand clear tt ur family is much more impt than me n bb...i mad at u but i believe let ppl do bad thing to us..don we do to ppl if nt we the same as them.. cz God nt blind... he'll protect gd ppl n vice versa to the bad ppl... he can even told me to scold him..keep repeating "faster Syg scold me".. siao..u sick still want me to scold u? U jolly well noe when u sick i wont scold u one... purposely rite..

Mum said maybe he kena retribution.. last 3 wks kena accident...tt happened after 2wks he make me cry when he said there no need for him to see my dad...nw kena operation cz knee dislocated...he kena tis after 1wk make me cry when he said me n bb nt impt n don wanna marry me.. ha.. dunno izzit retirbution or nt.. hmmm.. juz wish him best of luck..

 

[cheekyprincess]

ok la.. she already died.. shall we stop talking about who is right or wrong? i brought up the matter cuz i thought maybe i was being too one sided n thus blurred my logic sense when talking about the abortion, thats all..

:nah:

i didnt mean anything bad or trying to do anyone evil here..:embarrassed:

 

[-SRI-]

ok la.. she already died.. shall we stop talking about who is right or wrong? i brought up the matter cuz i thought maybe i was being too one sided n thus blurred my logic sense when talking about the abortion, thats all..

:nah:

i didnt mean anything bad or trying to do anyone evil here..:embarrassed:

Sorry..sorry... i nvr meant to said she's wrg.. for me everyone hv their own difficulties n limitations in dealing the situation...So do i... We cant predict the future... so i juz take one step at a time n enjoy my pregnancy while i can... hehehe.. I juz felt her HB escort free lor...he nvr suffer anything... for me its unfair lei..but again..... nth is fair tis world hor... u being one sided cz u urself hv experience wit ur own eyes hw ur fren suffered..so its understandable... hope her soul rest in peace..wish her bb best of luck... Do his/her mummy proud.. :wong19:

 

[cheekyprincess]

=) thks.. your so sweet n understanding... your baby will be so happy to have you as the mother! ancing_wub:

 

[LoVeS]

haiz..yalor...shld vent the anger to the father nt to the bb... ppl told me to abort cz he out of sudden don wanna marry me... but i rather "abort" the father than abort my bb... bb is obviously part of me..whereas he's nt...so why shld i abort my flesh n blood? why shld i kill it when i luv it so much? why shld i abort juz bcz he cant be wit me? n why shld i go thru all tis abortion thingy like the side effects n he juz pay for the abortion fees??

Ytd visit him..he was shocked why i visit him n hw i noe he has been hospitalised.. i tink he meant after all he did to me n bb why i still come n visit him.. dunno why when i watched tv he keep looking at me... when i asked.. he said nth... he wanna take a look at my tummy if it big oredi or nt.. he told me its big oredi..duh!! of course big..u hv nt seen me for a mth plus..nw i 4 mths...i dunno why he wanna look... told me to take care n go take breakfast cz i hv nt take it...frens said he is weird..when he sick he'll tell me.. hahaha... which i myself nt sure why...overall... the visiting is alrite.. he still can joke2... still the same.. told him oredi tt i wont abort.. u can lead ur lives n i lead mine.. i noe our bb will bring happiness to me.. i don habours any tots of being wit u when u make ur stand clear tt ur family is much more impt than me n bb...i mad at u but i believe let ppl do bad thing to us..don we do to ppl if nt we the same as them.. cz God nt blind... he'll protect gd ppl n vice versa to the bad ppl... he can even told me to scold him..keep repeating "faster Syg scold me".. siao..u sick still want me to scold u? U jolly well noe when u sick i wont scold u one... purposely rite..

Mum said maybe he kena retribution.. last 3 wks kena accident...tt happened after 2wks he make me cry when he said there no need for him to see my dad...nw kena operation cz knee dislocated...he kena tis after 1wk make me cry when he said me n bb nt impt n don wanna marry me.. ha.. dunno izzit retirbution or nt.. hmmm.. juz wish him best of luck..

i really duno wat ur tinking at all. Since u already decided to draw the line clear then why still bother abt him or visit him?

I knw others might tink "aiya it nt u of coz u say so easy lah" but sorry i went thru wat u went thru b4 tts why i say tis to u.

Mine was a 3yrs r/s n when i found out i was pregnant tt ex of mine asked me to go abort 1st then marry me as he say no $$ but who totally disregard the risk of abortion, his mom aso ask him to tell me go abort n dun marry me, even my own family aso ask me go abort then get married.

After abortion i found out he got another gf outside but he deny it n even make use of his army buddy who is interested in me BY saying i betrayed him so he dumped me. I tried means n ways to xplain but no use at all.

In the end i knw he is juz trying to find xcuse to dump me after dupe me go abortion. I went depression for 1-2 wks as i felt i am really stopid n regret why did i believe him tt end up losing my bb. Even till today i still blame myself although i haf my own son n family now.

I draw the line very clear wif him coz i knw how b@stard he is for cheating me b it $$ or physically or feelings/love. Ya i am stopid enuff to lend him my saving tt is a few thousand dollars.

Although till today i havent see any karma on him which he is married n even own a car but refuse to return my $$ + still fooling ard outside even though he has a wife. I believe there will b a time when karma will fall on such a heartless man who doesnt even feel a single thing for killing his own unborn child!!

If i can go thru such tough path which i believe u can too. U knw wat kind of person he is so why continue to haf "unclear" r/s between the 2 of u when u knw it is nt doing anything gd for u or ur bb.

I believe in tis sentence "whenever there is sum1 hurting u, there will b sum1 out in tis world who will heal u too" If u dun gif urself n others a chance then u will b forever struck in tis unclear r/s wif him which u see NO future at all. U haf to tink for ur bb future too, do u tink wif tis kind of father ur child will b proud of?

 

[LoVeS]

ok la.. she already died.. shall we stop talking about who is right or wrong? i brought up the matter cuz i thought maybe i was being too one sided n thus blurred my logic sense when talking about the abortion, thats all..

:nah:

i didnt mean anything bad or trying to do anyone evil here..:embarrassed:

eh she died already ah? So sorry i didnt knw tt coz i aso haf a frd who commit suicide by jumping frm 9th floor of a hdb but yet survived wif no brain injuries at all.

 

[-SRI-]

i really duno wat ur tinking at all. Since u already decided to draw the line clear then why still bother abt him or visit him?

I knw others might tink "aiya it nt u of coz u say so easy lah" but sorry i went thru wat u went thru b4 tts why i say tis to u.

Mine was a 3yrs r/s n when i found out i was pregnant tt ex of mine asked me to go abort 1st then marry me as he say no $$ but who totally disregard the risk of abortion, his mom aso ask him to tell me go abort n dun marry me, even my own family aso ask me go abort then get married.

After abortion i found out he got another gf outside but he deny it n even make use of his army buddy who is interested in me BY saying i betrayed him so he dumped me. I tried means n ways to xplain but no use at all.

In the end i knw he is juz trying to find xcuse to dump me after dupe me go abortion. I went depression for 1-2 wks as i felt i am really stopid n regret why did i believe him tt end up losing my bb. Even till today i still blame myself although i haf my own son n family now.

I draw the line very clear wif him coz i knw how b@stard he is for cheating me b it $$ or physically or feelings/love. Ya i am stopid enuff to lend him my saving tt is a few thousand dollars.

Although till today i havent see any karma on him which he is married n even own a car but refuse to return my $$ + still fooling ard outside even though he has a wife. I believe there will b a time when karma will fall on such a heartless man who doesnt even feel a single thing for killing his own unborn child!!

If i can go thru such tough path which i believe u can too. U knw wat kind of person he is so why continue to haf "unclear" r/s between the 2 of u when u knw it is nt doing anything gd for u or ur bb.

I believe in tis sentence "whenever there is sum1 hurting u, there will b sum1 out in tis world who will heal u too" If u dun gif urself n others a chance then u will b forever struck in tis unclear r/s wif him which u see NO future at all. U haf to tink for ur bb future too, do u tink wif tis kind of father ur child will b proud of?

LOL... i visit him as a fren.. we nt bf gf animore.. I'm VERY clear abt my status wit him nw... Like i mentioned b4 i make things clear to him, he lead his own lives n i lead mine.. Why cant i visit him?? nth wrg wit it.. even if he died, i'll still visit his grave.. ok.. tis is juz MY philosophy of life... No need to revenge or hv such hatred on such person.. cz it wont bring me any gd..will bring harm cz we keep thinking abt wat they hv done to us..abt we make a mistakes all tt... end up, we will suffer emotionally n bcz of such guy or incident in our lives, it'll deter us for moving forward... if ppl keep revenge back n hv such hatred back den dere will be no end to it....Yes, i still mad at him cz hey i still a human beings wit feelings..but still I don hv such big hatred on him... I don like the feeling of hating somebody so much... instead of hating him which waste of my time.. might as well i prove to him n his family i can be a single mum n success in bringing up my child..

I hv read tis bk abt my religion..pardon me k if i talk abt my religion.. hmm.. its says gt tis grp of ppl hv hurl abuses & even hit the prophet but stills he treats his "enemy" gd.... cz God teach him to treat others gd eventhough they hv treated u badly as one day they'll realise the gd in u.. n oso even if his enemy were to come over to his hse n argue wit him, he'll still treat his enemy as a guest.. I'm nt great as prophet..beyond tt.. I weak.. So i juz do watever i can as normal human being..

Like i mentioned b4..watever each person go thru is different...different guy, situations n the limitations in ur urself...nw we oso hv different race n thinkings...No offence.. for example he DUPED u to abort.. why u abort? if u luv ur bb u shldnt.. I noe u hv ur own reasons rite..everythings in tis world tt we do or happen hv a reason n blessings behind it..it takes time for us to understand..For me even he promised me he'll marry me after i abort.. i wont abort one...cz for me if he luvs me, we can juz get marry wat.. why muz abort? n i luv my bb so much...n when everyone including my mom n frens told me to abort.. i still stand firm nt to till NW cz i noe wat i want in lives...My parents, frens n even him nw respect my decisions in keeping my bb...

Loves, wat I'm trying to say oso.. ur stand n my stand is different cz u chose to abort n i'm nt..the path we chose oso different...even ur case n mine is totally different cz in the end u don hv the support of ur parents... but one thing for sure the same.. we luvs our BB...

thruout my lives, i hv been strgly holding on to nt to regrets... learn frm ur mistakes...don look back...can reminisce..but move FORWARD....Nw i moving n looking forward to noe my bb gender... whahahahahhahahaah...ancing_wub:...hope tis tues can noe...if nt muz wait for nxt mth... excited........

Btw my darling did asked me do i regret in knowing him.. my ans to her is no w/o hesistation.. i don cz we hv our own great moments too... compare to other ppl.. he nvr hit me or force me to abort.....sometimes we need to think of ppl gd character rather than focus on their flaws..n we shld feel fortunate n contented wit wat we hv cz some ppl even in the worst state than us... I only dissapointed in his decision for choosing his parents, for mention abt abortion n for saying his family is much more impt than me n bb...Overall tis relationship hv make me stronger than b4...n i learnt alot frm it... I thank God for giving me the courage to live for my bb...

I'm very happy for u for having such a great HB n Son... be happy always ya...Happie tt the torment is over for u.. ur ex ar..sure kena retribution one day..maybe nt in tis world..in the netherworld he wld get it for sure...god nt blind one..he'll reap wat he sow..

 

[LoVeS]

I am nt asking u to revenge or hatred to him, wat i mean is draw the line clear between the 2 of u n do u knw why u haf such unclear r/s wif him last time? It bcoz of him who keep wanting to haf 2 of the best world. Even till now the way he tok to u it nt juz FRDS u knw wat i mean?

Dun visit him draw line very clear will only do urself gd. Do u rmb u say b4 when u knw he is married u told him to settle things then find u but end up duno why continue seeing each other? It is the same cycle as u r now n even ur willing to break the ties but he is nt coz if nt he wont b saying those conversations wif u when u visit him.

As for my own case where u mention he duped me to abortion but if i love my bb i wont abort? Like i mentioned i didnt xpected him to dump me as he said after abortion then get married, reason is he dun tink he can afford to haf bb in term of $$ as he was serving ns sumore his mom didnt like me so his family own help n same goes for my family they encourage us to abort for tis bb n get marry so tt in future we r financially stable then haf own bb which even my family aso didnt xpected my ex is juz luring me to abort IF nt i wont even agree at all.

I haf to agree wif my family coz financially cant afford will only bring misery to the unborn child. If ur bf dun haf $$ n ur family wont support/help u in term of $$ i dun tink u will stand firm to keep it. Even u stand firm to keep, how r u going to support ur bb wif juz ur own salary even if u wrk? Bcoz ur bf has income which at least u can ask for maintenance so if i were u, i will keep the bb regardless everyone against me but too bad tt time my bf in ns so it impossible to ask for maintenance which i cant support the bb alone.

We all knw tt love cant buy foods but only $$, i can starve but bb cant n it will only bring misery. We can say HOW MUCH we love our children or bb BUT juz LOVE alone can feed the hungry children? If i can barely afford to support my bb of coz by all means i will keep the bb BUT i knw i cant so even i regret aso no use.

Initially i didnt realised it until my frd told me " u keep feeling regret n blame urself but haf u ever tot of u were to keep the bb tt time, do u tink u can support the bb w/o any financial help? Do u tink juz love alone can bring up the child? U r making the best choice in ur situation coz u cant afford in term of financial."Which is why earlier posts i mentioned b4 i dun encourage ppl go abortion unless when really needed.

Ya true sad to say i haf very $$ minded parents who doesnt care abt me ever since i am 17yrs old, i earn my own $$ n i pay everything myself even when i am hospitalized.

Wat i am saying is the way u n him now will only lead to a chinese call 纠缠不清 which will lead u to nowhere at all n back to square 1 again sooner or later tts is doing urself no gd at all. As for wat is the meaning of 纠缠不清 u can go find translation on webby.

Anyway it ur life n we can only gif advice coz ultimately to listen or not it up to urself.

Ya i am fortunate now as my hubby didnt mind abt my past coz b4 we got together i already told him my past coz i dun wan him to regret been wif me for knwing i haf such past n he feel tt wat happen in the past is nt important but the future tt is important which he is aso glad tt i am so honest to him.

 

[-SRI-]

I am nt asking u to revenge or hatred to him, wat i mean is draw the line clear between the 2 of u n do u knw why u haf such unclear r/s wif him last time? It bcoz of him who keep wanting to haf 2 of the best world. Even till now the way he tok to u it nt juz FRDS u knw wat i mean?

Dun visit him draw line very clear will only do urself gd. Do u rmb u say b4 when u knw he is married u told him to settle things then find u but end up duno why continue seeing each other? It is the same cycle as u r now n even ur willing to break the ties but he is nt coz if nt he wont b saying those conversations wif u when u visit him.

As for my own case where u mention he duped me to abortion but if i love my bb i wont abort? Like i mentioned i didnt xpected him to dump me as he said after abortion then get married, reason is he dun tink he can afford to haf bb in term of $$ as he was serving ns sumore his mom didnt like me so his family own help n same goes for my family they encourage us to abort for tis bb n get marry so tt in future we r financially stable then haf own bb which even my family aso didnt xpected my ex is juz luring me to abort IF nt i wont even agree at all.

I haf to agree wif my family coz financially cant afford will only bring misery to the unborn child. If ur bf dun haf $$ n ur family wont support/help u in term of $$ i dun tink u will stand firm to keep it. Even u stand firm to keep, how r u going to support ur bb wif juz ur own salary even if u wrk? Bcoz ur bf has income which at least u can ask for maintenance so if i were u, i will keep the bb regardless everyone against me but too bad tt time my bf in ns so it impossible to ask for maintenance which i cant support the bb alone.

We all knw tt love cant buy foods but only $$, i can starve but bb cant n it will only bring misery. We can say HOW MUCH we love our children or bb BUT juz LOVE alone can feed the hungry children? If i can barely afford to support my bb of coz by all means i will keep the bb BUT i knw i cant so even i regret aso no use.

Initially i didnt realised it until my frd told me " u keep feeling regret n blame urself but haf u ever tot of u were to keep the bb tt time, do u tink u can support the bb w/o any financial help? Do u tink juz love alone can bring up the child? U r making the best choice in ur situation coz u cant afford in term of financial."Which is why earlier posts i mentioned b4 i dun encourage ppl go abortion unless when really needed.

Ya true sad to say i haf very $$ minded parents who doesnt care abt me ever since i am 17yrs old, i earn my own $$ n i pay everything myself even when i am hospitalized.

Wat i am saying is the way u n him now will only lead to a chinese call 纠缠不清 which will lead u to nowhere at all n back to square 1 again sooner or later tts is doing urself no gd at all. As for wat is the meaning of 纠缠不清 u can go find translation on webby.

Anyway it ur life n we can only gif advice coz ultimately to listen or not it up to urself.

Ya i am fortunate now as my hubby didnt mind abt my past coz b4 we got together i already told him my past coz i dun wan him to regret been wif me for knwing i haf such past n he feel tt wat happen in the past is nt important but the future tt is important which he is aso glad tt i am so honest to him.

wats wrg wit the way he talk to me?? why?

We seeing each other cz everyone in his n my family agree to it.. n his wife agree me in becoming the 2nd wife.. if i were to tell u my story takes more than a day.. hahaha... so don wish to talk abt it as its over liao... Like I said I visit him as a fren.. i visit him once tts all.. i don agree by nt visiting him tt will draw the line very clear.. its the mind n intention.. juz my POV... Why? wats wrg wit his conversation?

Abt the 3 & 4th para, tts y i said ur situation n mine is different... Our story line is different.. u didnt expect him to dumped u after abortion n i didnt expect him to choose his parents instead of me n bb..n oso ur parents cant support u & bb at tt time which u decided to abort, hv bb after u n ur ex stable...but my mom is supportive which i appreciate it very much...In terms of financial, yes i cant support my bb.. my own savings is nt enough..for half mth i can afford..the rest mum will support me... n i tink no matter wat oso u'll abort even if u noe ur ex lure u to it cz like wat u said ur family, u n ur ex cant even support ur bb...u cant oso ask for bb maintanance...n u noe if u bring ur child up, he/she will be misery..tts y i said we all hv our each own reasons for our actions...certain circumstances forced us to decide n do smth tt we really much don want to...

Me n him its OVER... I WONT be back to square one for SURE... cz I noe wat I want.. tts is to hv smooth n safe delivery hopefully n be a gd mom..work hard for our future...I dunno wat god plan for me in future..so i juz take one step at a time...

talking abt bb.... Amulet due oredi!!! Hope she hv safe n smooth deliver... wonder hw she is...

abt the chinese words..hmm..can nxt time atleast give me the hanyu piyin? U explain to me the meaning la since u wrote tt... a simple one will do...

Thanks for ur advice..I really appreciate it..I noe u wanna me to ignore him completely...but after all he's the father of my child.. i need him for certain things like blood test..he still havent do..nw kena accident.. immobile...if my is a bb gal..worst!! I need him for her marriage....tts y i hope my bb is a boy eventhough i luv n wanting a bb gal alot...Don worry..its juz a visit which i go wit mum...n we oso rarely contact each other unless i gt smth impt to tell him regarding bb...

Btw mum told me if the tummy round is a bb gal? if tummy oval is a boy? I noe it may nt be accurate.. juz wanna noe...:001_302:

 

[-SRI-]

Loves..actually ur story reminds me of someone.... I cant help but to tink of her...its been on my mind...cz she in worst state than me cz my mum is very supportive one in terms of finance n moral... Give me ur comments n suggestion on tis k.. thks..

She's 20 tis yr..he ex don wanna be responsible of the bb.. the ex father oso like heck care...tink she nw 1 or 2 mths preg.. i told her to abort cz i see her dad n mom cant support her financially n morally....her parents divorced.. she in her mum custody i tink..her mum remarried n hv 2 kids.. btw she hv 6 siblings.... i finds her parents like heck care abt her.. she insisted to keep her bb cz she can fight for bb maintainance.. but i told tt can only be done after bb is born which i bet takes time to process..as at nw wat abt the check up expenses, hosp bills, $$ for her to eat n buy maternity dress...who going to take care of tt financially when her parents don bother to...her dad work as car washer only...her mum tink full time hsewife..her step father don like them....haiz.... having a kid needs alot of $$$... n oso i don tink there's employer out dere wanna employ a preg lady...

Told her to abort nw cz she juz 2 mths..if 4-5mth muz induced labour i tink...den again...she hv no $$ to abort..abortion cost approx $300-$500 rite? alamak...i really dunno wat to do seh... I'm STUCK!!!

My only suggestion is to borrow frm her aunt or uncles to get the abortion $$..n to go for counselling at FSC...

 

[LoVeS]

wats wrg wit the way he talk to me?? why?

We seeing each other cz everyone in his n my family agree to it.. n his wife agree me in becoming the 2nd wife.. if i were to tell u my story takes more than a day.. hahaha... so don wish to talk abt it as its over liao... Like I said I visit him as a fren.. i visit him once tts all.. i don agree by nt visiting him tt will draw the line very clear.. its the mind n intention.. juz my POV... Why? wats wrg wit his conversation?

Abt the 3 & 4th para, tts y i said ur situation n mine is different... Our story line is different.. u didnt expect him to dumped u after abortion n i didnt expect him to choose his parents instead of me n bb..n oso ur parents cant support u & bb at tt time which u decided to abort, hv bb after u n ur ex stable...but my mom is supportive which i appreciate it very much...In terms of financial, yes i cant support my bb.. my own savings is nt enough..for half mth i can afford..the rest mum will support me... n i tink no matter wat oso u'll abort even if u noe ur ex lure u to it cz like wat u said ur family, u n ur ex cant even support ur bb...u cant oso ask for bb maintanance...n u noe if u bring ur child up, he/she will be misery..tts y i said we all hv our each own reasons for our actions...certain circumstances forced us to decide n do smth tt we really much don want to...

Me n him its OVER... I WONT be back to square one for SURE... cz I noe wat I want.. tts is to hv smooth n safe delivery hopefully n be a gd mom..work hard for our future...I dunno wat god plan for me in future..so i juz take one step at a time...

talking abt bb.... Amulet due oredi!!! Hope she hv safe n smooth deliver... wonder hw she is...

abt the chinese words..hmm..can nxt time atleast give me the hanyu piyin? U explain to me the meaning la since u wrote tt... a simple one will do...

Thanks for ur advice..I really appreciate it..I noe u wanna me to ignore him completely...but after all he's the father of my child.. i need him for certain things like blood test..he still havent do..nw kena accident.. immobile...if my is a bb gal..worst!! I need him for her marriage....tts y i hope my bb is a boy eventhough i luv n wanting a bb gal alot...Don worry..its juz a visit which i go wit mum...n we oso rarely contact each other unless i gt smth impt to tell him regarding bb...

Btw mum told me if the tummy round is a bb gal? if tummy oval is a boy? I noe it may nt be accurate.. juz wanna noe...:001_302:

Oh u understand han yu ping ying ah? I tot u duno so i might as well wrote chinese LOLX So ur mom did went wif u to visit him issit? If ur mom is ard still ok coz ur mom is another "outsider" so can see the pic more clear than u do then dun need to worry tt much.

U asked me wats wrong wif the way he tok? I rmb u say tt ur frd say he is weird rite? He is weird lor if nt why would he ask u if u regret knw hm or not? Why would he say a couple of things tt u aso not sure or duno why?

In a way, sum ppl always like to make themselves like very ke lian n suddenly seem very concern of things tt they usually wont really concern abt which is trying to make ppl soften. TT is why i say the things he do n say is weird NT like frds will behave or will say BUT rather trying to make u soften so tt things can b the same again. Tis is aso the reason why i say u shouldnt haf go visit him BUT since ur mom is ard then should b ok.

I duno if u understand wat i been trying to tell u or not.

amulet due how u knw? She sms u? Ya myth say pointed is boy while round is girl. Tats is how i guess the gender too at another thread. Mine was pointed so is ds BUT u haf to wait until at least 7mths of ur pregnancy then u can sort of tell.

 

[LoVeS]

Loves..actually ur story reminds me of someone.... I cant help but to tink of her...its been on my mind...cz she in worst state than me cz my mum is very supportive one in terms of finance n moral... Give me ur comments n suggestion on tis k.. thks..

She's 20 tis yr..he ex don wanna be responsible of the bb.. the ex father oso like heck care...tink she nw 1 or 2 mths preg.. i told her to abort cz i see her dad n mom cant support her financially n morally....her parents divorced.. she in her mum custody i tink..her mum remarried n hv 2 kids.. btw she hv 6 siblings.... i finds her parents like heck care abt her.. she insisted to keep her bb cz she can fight for bb maintainance.. but i told tt can only be done after bb is born which i bet takes time to process..as at nw wat abt the check up expenses, hosp bills, $$ for her to eat n buy maternity dress...who going to take care of tt financially when her parents don bother to...her dad work as car washer only...her mum tink full time hsewife..her step father don like them....haiz.... having a kid needs alot of $$$... n oso i don tink there's employer out dere wanna employ a preg lady...

Told her to abort nw cz she juz 2 mths..if 4-5mth muz induced labour i tink...den again...she hv no $$ to abort..abortion cost approx $300-$500 rite? alamak...i really dunno wat to do seh... I'm STUCK!!!

My only suggestion is to borrow frm her aunt or uncles to get the abortion $$..n to go for counselling at FSC...

Ya quite similar coz tt incident of mine aso happened when i was 20yrs old only, both my parents divorced which my mom got bf while my dad remarried n i am under my mom's custody.

Yes normally ppl wont hire ppl who r pregnant coz nt long they will go maternity leave which is paid leave. Ya the expenses b4 bb is born r nt an small amount of $$ n is her ex working currently?? If nt how to fight for maintenance when he is nt working? Impossible to do so when he himself cant even support himself so he is nt liable to gif her $$ if i am nt wrong.

Abortion muz b done within 2-5mths n it haf to below 5mths if nt will endanger the mother's life as risk is alot higher. As for abortion, she can get referral letter frm polyclinic so tt she will b under subsidized so she dun need to pay so much $$ on her side. Does she has medisave? Can deduct frm medisave n on cash i dun tink need alot after deduction.

Tat time my abortion i paid $200++ as i was abt 8-10wks pregnant. Cant rmb is it paid in cash after deduction of medisave or issit $200 all paid by medisave. After all tis is an incident i dun wish to rmb so i cant really rmb the amount, paiseh if cant feedback much to help ur frd.

If she insist on keeping the bb then she can tot of gif up for adoption where she can call those hotline n see how those professionals can advice her coz if i am nt wrong, if gif up for adoption the expenses dun need worry or so but i am nt very sure too.

 

[-SRI-]

Oh u understand han yu ping ying ah? I tot u duno so i might as well wrote chinese LOLX So ur mom did went wif u to visit him issit? If ur mom is ard still ok coz ur mom is another "outsider" so can see the pic more clear than u do then dun need to worry tt much.

U asked me wats wrong wif the way he tok? I rmb u say tt ur frd say he is weird rite? He is weird lor if nt why would he ask u if u regret knw hm or not? Why would he say a couple of things tt u aso not sure or duno why?

In a way, sum ppl always like to make themselves like very ke lian n suddenly seem very concern of things tt they usually wont really concern abt which is trying to make ppl soften. TT is why i say the things he do n say is weird NT like frds will behave or will say BUT rather trying to make u soften so tt things can b the same again. Tis is aso the reason why i say u shouldnt haf go visit him BUT since ur mom is ard then should b ok.

I duno if u understand wat i been trying to tell u or not.

amulet due how u knw? She sms u? Ya myth say pointed is boy while round is girl. Tats is how i guess the gender too at another thread. Mine was pointed so is ds BUT u haf to wait until at least 7mths of ur pregnancy then u can sort of tell.

ok ok.. i noe abit of hanyu piyin..easier to read ma..:001_302: ya.. mum follow me..i cldnt be go alone..if nt ar ltr he or other ppl tot i still want him to marry me..like desperate.. but NO.. I'm nt..I hv decided to move on w/o him n be happie wit my BB...mum was wit me thruout the visit...Oh...i get u..abt he ask me to eat...ask abt bb all tt rite??? hahaha...don worry.. i nt soften by tt..cz I hv enough n learnt frm it lor..all his sweets words are all bullshit la..liar...broke his promises... told him no matter wat..i'll fight for bb maintanance one..cz its my BB RIGHTS!! actually he was shocked to see mum followed me...he tot my mum was so evil...wanted him to die..but no lor..mum nt like tt..see him still can talk as per normal...unlike his family! ha...

Oh..Amulet ar.... I luv to see the mummies tickers when they due..so few wks ago hv been looking at her tickers ...n counting hw many days left for her to give brith...hahahaha..pervert me...:001_302: nth better to do... but i excited...Nw waiting for her to announce her bb name in tis forum n when she deliver...:tlaugh:

oh....icic..thks...mum oso said like tt..so chinese oso hv the same beliefs...:tlaugh: hopefully tis tues can noe my bb gender..kiasu me...

 

[-SRI-]

Ya quite similar coz tt incident of mine aso happened when i was 20yrs old only, both my parents divorced which my mom got bf while my dad remarried n i am under my mom's custody.

Yes normally ppl wont hire ppl who r pregnant coz nt long they will go maternity leave which is paid leave. Ya the expenses b4 bb is born r nt an small amount of $$ n is her ex working currently?? If nt how to fight for maintenance when he is nt working? Impossible to do so when he himself cant even support himself so he is nt liable to gif her $$ if i am nt wrong.

Abortion muz b done within 2-5mths n it haf to below 5mths if nt will endanger the mother's life as risk is alot higher. As for abortion, she can get referral letter frm polyclinic so tt she will b under subsidized so she dun need to pay so much $$ on her side. Does she has medisave? Can deduct frm medisave n on cash i dun tink need alot after deduction.

Tat time my abortion i paid $200++ as i was abt 8-10wks pregnant. Cant rmb is it paid in cash after deduction of medisave or issit $200 all paid by medisave. After all tis is an incident i dun wish to rmb so i cant really rmb the amount, paiseh if cant feedback much to help ur frd.

If she insist on keeping the bb then she can tot of gif up for adoption where she can call those hotline n see how those professionals can advice her coz if i am nt wrong, if gif up for adoption the expenses dun need worry or so but i am nt very sure too.

I nt sure she hv medisave or nt..will tell my sis to ask her...ic...den will enquire at poly abt the abortion cost...its ok Loves..u help her alot oredi..nw she needs to help herself...thks alot...

yahor...talking abt adoption..i remember the family life website...will tell her to make an appt to FSC asap...

Thank you.......

 

[LoVeS]

ok ok.. i noe abit of hanyu piyin..easier to read ma..:001_302: ya.. mum follow me..i cldnt be go alone..if nt ar ltr he or other ppl tot i still want him to marry me..like desperate.. but NO.. I'm nt..I hv decided to move on w/o him n be happie wit my BB...mum was wit me thruout the visit...Oh...i get u..abt he ask me to eat...ask abt bb all tt rite??? hahaha...don worry.. i nt soften by tt..cz I hv enough n learnt frm it lor..all his sweets words are all bullshit la..liar...broke his promises... told him no matter wat..i'll fight for bb maintanance one..cz its my BB RIGHTS!! actually he was shocked to see mum followed me...he tot my mum was so evil...wanted him to die..but no lor..mum nt like tt..see him still can talk as per normal...unlike his family! ha...

Oh..Amulet ar.... I luv to see the mummies tickers when they due..so few wks ago hv been looking at her tickers ...n counting hw many days left for her to give brith...hahahaha..pervert me...:001_302: nth better to do... but i excited...Nw waiting for her to announce her bb name in tis forum n when she deliver...:tlaugh:

oh....icic..thks...mum oso said like tt..so chinese oso hv the same beliefs...:tlaugh: hopefully tis tues can noe my bb gender..kiasu me...

u better pray hard ur bb dun b shy by hiding his/her gender coz at times bb tends to cover their gender wif hands or legs :tlaugh:Hopefully ur bb wont b shy~ I rmb when i see my ultrasound when my ds is only 3mths big in my tummy i already can tell he is a boy which even hubby aso can tell COZ he was kicking so active like as if kicking a football when doc do the scan for me which even doc aso say CFM is boy coz too active liao. :tlaugh:

 

[LoVeS]

I nt sure she hv medisave or nt..will tell my sis to ask her...ic...den will enquire at poly abt the abortion cost...its ok Loves..u help her alot oredi..nw she needs to help herself...thks alot...

yahor...talking abt adoption..i remember the family life website...will tell her to make an appt to FSC asap...

Thank you.......

Dun ask polyclinic the cost coz they wont knw as polyclinic dun do abortion 1 tats why they will normally refer those who wan to abort or continue their pregnancy to watever hospitals they wan. Tat time i mentioned refer to KKH so polyclinic gave me a referral letter n book a appt date for me. Btw ur frd after see doc at polyclinic she still need to see the hospital gynae to do ultrasound to check the bb exact age then they will ask her go for sum consultation then will book a date for her to do the abortion.

Be it gif up for adoption or abortion she aso need to act fast coz it nt as simple as she tinks. It need alot of steps b4 she can go for abortion or gif up for adoption if she dunwan to abort yet cannot afford. If she wana abort she really haf to act fast b4 the pregnancy is too late to terminate coz by certain wks, normally doc wont wan to do abortion coz risks r too high already so tats why i ask u to tell ur frd faster go see polyclinic get referral letter n appt date wif hospital gynae 1st.

 

[-SRI-]

u better pray hard ur bb dun b shy by hiding his/her gender coz at times bb tends to cover their gender wif hands or legs :tlaugh:Hopefully ur bb wont b shy~ I rmb when i see my ultrasound when my ds is only 3mths big in my tummy i already can tell he is a boy which even hubby aso can tell COZ he was kicking so active like as if kicking a football when doc do the scan for me which even doc aso say CFM is boy coz too active liao. :tlaugh:

ah..last mth went for dwn syndrome test, my bb oredi cover the face till doc ask me turn on my left side n cough but still cant see the nasal bone..den hv to walk walk for 5 mins n do the scan again n finally bb co-operate...haiz.... if follow me, bb will be shy..if follow the daddy, will be THICK SKINNED!!! :tlaugh::tlaugh::tlaugh:......wah Loves...1st time in my entire lives ar...i get to noe tt 3mths can see the gender oredi lei...ur bb broke the record..:tlaugh:ltr wanna share the news wit my mum..cz she die die said ppl all 5mths den can see bb gender..ur DS prove her wrg... hahaha...I'm nt tt lucky unlike u.... thks Loves..i hope my bb nt shy one..:001_302:... tis tues i'll update on my check up k...my doc so far nvr say anything abt bb...he only say my bb length n weight is average.....