My husband has lost his temper countless times. When baby fell down and knocked her head, he shouted at me and slapped the back of my head 3 times. His friend called him and he wasted no time to tell me that he was going out AGAIN. Emotionally, I felt hurt. Somemore when I was cooking today, my kid was wailing her lungs out, trying to get me to stop cooking her porridge and play with her. The glass panel dropped down and, I accidently tossed the porridge all over the place. Thinking she was hungry, I fed her bread, but she choked on it and started crying. I carried her out of the baby chair and she spit out the bread. My sister in law came out and helped me with her while I continued to cook the darned porridge. Aft feeding her, she rubbed her eyes. I tried to coax her to slp but she didnt want to slp. Honestly I am feeling frustrated and am running out of patience. I feel so blue today.
Bad day
- Thread starter Pei Qing
- Start date
uddermummy
Well-Known Member
OMG! How can your hubby do that! Sayang, you really sound stessed out. Maybe you can try getting more help for the bb and chores?
But seriously, you may want to seek help if your husband gets more violent.
He always tell me he did tis in a fit of anger. He doesnt mean it. We have been married for barely 2 yrs. Somemore mil did not stop him. Mil somehow supprts him lo.( Could hear it in her tone of voice). I feel really stressed out. Time-out, anyone?
well, no matter what the issue is, he has no right to hit you... does he hit you in front of his mum?
Apparently, he did. Haiya.
apollo
Well-Known Member
he hit u???!!! and even in front of his mum??????!!!!!!!! did his mum say him?????
pei qing, i totally can understand how tedious it is to take care of baby... cos mine, recently also wants my attention 100%!! i cant hardly have any food.. i miss my breakfast, lunch just to take care of him... we sayang each other... =)
pei qing, i totally can understand how tedious it is to take care of baby... cos mine, recently also wants my attention 100%!! i cant hardly have any food.. i miss my breakfast, lunch just to take care of him... we sayang each other... =)
CanCanMum
Moderator
*hUgs*
sorry what glass panel dropped? Did it hurt anyone?
sorry to say but i really really cannot stand man hitting woman
perhaps you can tell your husb that he has no right to hit you its against woman rights. IF he is goin to continue doing tat tell him that u will report police (sorry but thats wad i told my dad, coz he oso has the habit of hitting my mum)
i understand about losing temper coz most man are bad tempered. But losing it and venting by violence is wrong.
Pei Qing babe, please take care.
sorry what glass panel dropped? Did it hurt anyone?
sorry to say but i really really cannot stand man hitting woman
perhaps you can tell your husb that he has no right to hit you its against woman rights. IF he is goin to continue doing tat tell him that u will report police (sorry but thats wad i told my dad, coz he oso has the habit of hitting my mum)
i understand about losing temper coz most man are bad tempered. But losing it and venting by violence is wrong.
Pei Qing babe, please take care.
pink_daisy
Member
u r barely married for 2yrs n he is already treating u tis way.... beware of man who hit wife! if he hits u again, tell him firmly tat u will report him to the police. i can understand how it is to tend kids, to cook, to handle so many things all at one time.. mayb u can cook the child's porridge when she/he is sleeping...then reheat the porridge when is feeding time..as for your own meals, prepare something simple like fried rice or u can cook the rice 1st (again, when child is sleeping) then a simple dish when u r abt to eat.. u can distract the child when u r doing your things by giving him/her some baby biscuits or some toys to play with.. else u can turn on the tv, let the child watches while u do some work.. take care...
Domique
Well-Known Member
we do have gathering at times... y not come out and relax. maybe u need to go out a while...
Ting
Well-Known Member
agree with can can mum, if he hits you again, warn him.
and to slap your head!!!
if its hand or leg still not that bad but head!!!!!
what if he hit too hard you hit something!!
stupid man! (sorry, but im like UGH!!)
and your mother in law, she's so heartless!
TS, do talk to your hubby about this, in a fit of anger, probably just once or twice. if EVERYTIME, then its a HABIT. and a bad one! he's got no rights nor reasons to hit no matter how angry he is.
we all understand how hard it is to tc of a child, we've been there, and still doing it.
ive got my bad days too, when im alone at hm taking care of pin when she was younger and like everything goes wrong. very frustrating.
how old is your girl? maybe you can take some toys or own the tv to distract her while you cook?
you need time out definately, if possible, bring your girl back to your parents place, talk to them, ask them is it ok if they help you to tc of your girl for one day while you go and relax with your friends?
relax, dont fluster, anything wrong, just relax and slowly clean up the mess, small issues only, if not you will get depressed.
if your girl cry, just go to her, calm her down,turn the fire smaller or use a slowcooker, better still.
or you can out her in a high chair and place her in the kitchen with you, then play with her on and off while you cook.
tts what i did last time.
sometimes, i will put pin in the walker n let her roam arnd the kitchen. i'll keep an eye on her while she runs here n there.
best not to reheat the food for children, will hv "wind" not good for babies.
and to slap your head!!!
if its hand or leg still not that bad but head!!!!!
what if he hit too hard you hit something!!
stupid man! (sorry, but im like UGH!!)
and your mother in law, she's so heartless!
TS, do talk to your hubby about this, in a fit of anger, probably just once or twice. if EVERYTIME, then its a HABIT. and a bad one! he's got no rights nor reasons to hit no matter how angry he is.
we all understand how hard it is to tc of a child, we've been there, and still doing it.
ive got my bad days too, when im alone at hm taking care of pin when she was younger and like everything goes wrong. very frustrating.
how old is your girl? maybe you can take some toys or own the tv to distract her while you cook?
you need time out definately, if possible, bring your girl back to your parents place, talk to them, ask them is it ok if they help you to tc of your girl for one day while you go and relax with your friends?
relax, dont fluster, anything wrong, just relax and slowly clean up the mess, small issues only, if not you will get depressed.
if your girl cry, just go to her, calm her down,turn the fire smaller or use a slowcooker, better still.
or you can out her in a high chair and place her in the kitchen with you, then play with her on and off while you cook.
tts what i did last time.
sometimes, i will put pin in the walker n let her roam arnd the kitchen. i'll keep an eye on her while she runs here n there.
best not to reheat the food for children, will hv "wind" not good for babies.
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No matter what happen, a man shld not raise his hands on u!
Whatsmore, being preggy and giving birth to a BB is hardship, he shld luv u even more since u have bear a kid for him!
I think u shld have a gd talk with him, tell him how u feel whenever he treat u this way.
Also, maybe u can go out n leave BB with him for half a day or something, let him have a feel what is it like to take care of a BB by himself
Whatsmore, being preggy and giving birth to a BB is hardship, he shld luv u even more since u have bear a kid for him!
I think u shld have a gd talk with him, tell him how u feel whenever he treat u this way.
Also, maybe u can go out n leave BB with him for half a day or something, let him have a feel what is it like to take care of a BB by himself
Wad I cant swallow is my pride. My gfs say I spoiled him rotten. I agree. He loses his temper as easy as u could say abc sometimes. He tells he had a bad day at wk. Sometimes, when 2 of the kids cry he go out. Tells me that he needs peace. Sometimes I feel he's unacceptable. He and his reasons.
I rem that time when I was pregnant, we had a big quarrel and he asked me to abort baby. He threatened to barge into my office when I hung his unreasonable call. Then he cried and begged me to come out in the carpark. I softened and 4gave him. So many times such tings have happened. I wonder how much I can take his bullshit.
He goes out 4 to 5 times per wk at nite with his guy frens. I understand that he needs his freedom. But I dun understand why he needs it so frequently. I understand his friends are not married yet. Sometimes aft a hard day of housework chores and taking care of baby, I jux wanted him to acc me. He like wan dun wan lidat.
Aft we had been married and had my 2nd bb, I didnt went out wid my gf once. MIL dun respect me at times when I chose to bf my bb also. I am so tired. emotionally and physically. My hubby says that he's tired aft a day of wk, still can go out wif his frens somemore. Acc me like very tired.
PS the glass panel is from the oil sucking machine. Didnt hit me, so I'm alrite.
I rem that time when I was pregnant, we had a big quarrel and he asked me to abort baby. He threatened to barge into my office when I hung his unreasonable call. Then he cried and begged me to come out in the carpark. I softened and 4gave him. So many times such tings have happened. I wonder how much I can take his bullshit.
He goes out 4 to 5 times per wk at nite with his guy frens. I understand that he needs his freedom. But I dun understand why he needs it so frequently. I understand his friends are not married yet. Sometimes aft a hard day of housework chores and taking care of baby, I jux wanted him to acc me. He like wan dun wan lidat.
Aft we had been married and had my 2nd bb, I didnt went out wid my gf once. MIL dun respect me at times when I chose to bf my bb also. I am so tired. emotionally and physically. My hubby says that he's tired aft a day of wk, still can go out wif his frens somemore. Acc me like very tired.
PS the glass panel is from the oil sucking machine. Didnt hit me, so I'm alrite.
uddermummy
Well-Known Member
peiqing, your mil is a mega, mega, mega PITA!!! There's only one thing that i hate more than a man that hits a woman, and that's a woman who condones violence against other women!!!
Have you tried getting a protection order against him? It's really unhealthy for the kids to see violence against their mummy. Try to get him to go for counselling.
Do take care!
Have you tried getting a protection order against him? It's really unhealthy for the kids to see violence against their mummy. Try to get him to go for counselling.
Do take care!
vinder79
Active Member
Hi babe
how abt this next time he hits you just walk out! Last year when i just gave birth my mother in law came by and was very sarcastic and my husband sided with his mum i got so mad i just left i took a shower fed baby and passed him to her. I told them since so much too comment do it yourself!i went to the coffeeshop and in half an hour my husband called me back.Since that day its like she has not made any comments cause their style of upbringing for their kids is very different from ours and it seems like they always like to either interfere or support their sons.But when we leave every thing to them to do OMG -its like a combustion!
uddermummy
Well-Known Member
yup, my hubby became more understanding when he had to help take care of the house and the baby when i was sick for about a week.
as for his parents, doesn't help if i leave a screaming bb with them, cos they will just assume that bad mummy hasn't done a good job in training bb, or that bb is just a naughty girl.
wah too over already and yes a man should never raise his hand at his gf/wife.
guess u shud let them see u got temper too.
If me i slap his face back and yes right in front of his mum. is damn bloody rude to do that to you.
my husband also i know his friends is impt to him. he also tells me smtimes he want to play sports with his friends. 2 days per week is v gd already. 4/5 days??? he v tired, u not tired izzit.
yah next time pluck up the courage to leave the house. i left the house once when me n hubby quarrel over his mum. he chase me behind. and tell him straight in the face, if he ever dare to slap u again, you are leaving with the kids.
guess u shud let them see u got temper too.
If me i slap his face back and yes right in front of his mum. is damn bloody rude to do that to you.
my husband also i know his friends is impt to him. he also tells me smtimes he want to play sports with his friends. 2 days per week is v gd already. 4/5 days??? he v tired, u not tired izzit.
yah next time pluck up the courage to leave the house. i left the house once when me n hubby quarrel over his mum. he chase me behind. and tell him straight in the face, if he ever dare to slap u again, you are leaving with the kids.
-jOanna
Member
Show them your temper! If that scenario happened to me i straight away take baby take cab home liao! lol
The last time I flared up was when I disagreed not to ff her. I wanted to bf her badly. My hubby sided with mil. Then I quarrelled. My hubby had an asthma attack, complained of chest pains. He collapsed on the floor. My mil held him saying I hai ren, saying i problematic and that it's a small matter. Ever since, I dun dare to speak out that loudly anymore.