Ting
Well-Known Member
maybe her MIL oso like tt treat her??
Difficult Mother-in-law
- Thread starter Fiffy80
- Start date
maybe her MIL oso like tt treat her??
i tink u got a MIL fm heaven...maybe she noes tt modern methods r different so trust ur decision 
i told my mum my rational for giving/doing certain things, n i'm glad tt they support me too...cos afterall, we all dun want anything bad to happen ma....
in fact, my parents did much more than their part as grandparents....thankfulli got them, if not i sure pengz!!!
but old ppl r old ppl la...sometimes they jus tok gibberish.....jus ignore....
i told my mum my rational for giving/doing certain things, n i'm glad tt they support me too...cos afterall, we all dun want anything bad to happen ma....
in fact, my parents did much more than their part as grandparents....thankfulli got them, if not i sure pengz!!!
but old ppl r old ppl la...sometimes they jus tok gibberish.....jus ignore....
deardar
Member
so wat if she get all that kind of treatment from her PIL??
m i deserve to get this kind of treatment from her oso ???
mae
Active Member
why would she feel this way, when she knows...no matter what happen her son will always be her son & she will always be the mother.
Jayme
New Member
I have a difficult SIL. She is my HB's younger sister. She got herself pregnant and got married but insisted to stay with my ILs. So her hubby shifted to my ILs' place and she had her baby there... she just had her 2nd baby and she told her brother, my hubby that she wants our room. Since we are not staying there, she said we have no rights to keep 1 room to ourselves. She is also giving a signal that we are not welcomed to our ILs' place..
There was once when HB and I were paktoring, she demanded a confrontation with me... so we went to a relative's house and I was made to sit in a corner where she drilled me and wants me to give her explanations why I dun let her brother go home... its like... we paktoring what... we need to go out to shop, watch movies, eat and stuff mah... she had a short cut coz she got pregnant, our fault meh?? She dunno what is pak tor meh?? She dated alot of men and had relations with the men also mah...
B4 our wedding, my MIL told us that the room at their place will be forever kept there so that we can go back to stay... So she made a plan and got herself pregnant again. She just gave birth, and i back counted 40 weeks and its on the weekend my MIL said the room is ours!! now my SIL said we do not deserve the room and she has 2 kids liao, she told my MIL's maid to throw everything in the room away and she made the room her's.
I BTH her that much that my HB sacrificed and quit from his father's company. Previously, his dad bought him a car to share with another colleague... but since he quitted, he asked his dad to take back the car... So my SIL said its her car lor... but my FIL said we can use the car whenever we want to... so everytime we need the car, we have to call her to ask for permission. There was one case when my FIL told us to take the car to visit my granny in law... she did not know and told us to bring the car back to her... den she shouted at us for the reason why we stole her car. I was super pissed!
On my wedding day, when she poured tea for me to drink, she just shouted at me "CHA" she was supposed to call me big sweep, but till now, she dun talk to me at all.. when she wants me to do things for her, she calls my HB to instruct me to do things... *points 3rd finger*
On my wedding day, at the dinner, she treated it like her's (she did not have a wedding dinner coz she shot-gun case, throw face mah... so no dinner). She was drinking so much and making so much noise... she was drunk at the end of the day... whenever we cheers, she will push me out from the picture... my HB's "brothers" all saw what happened.. and one of them will keep a hand behind me so that I dun fall. And guess what... when the pictures came out, she is in each and every foto. I was either not in the foto or in the corner... she is almost always in the middle of the foto. *PISSED*
Last month, we tried to borrow the car, she refused to let us have it... The very next day, my FIL opened another new shop, so we asked my FIL to fetch us... when we were about to go home, we started walking to my FIL's car.... she stopped us and shouted "YOU TWO CANNOT TAKE MRT HOME AH?? SO NEAR?? I WANT TO GO HOME ALSO. DAD's CAR NO SPACE" We were right outside the new shop! so many people were looking at us. Who does she think she is?? I walked off... and my FIL saw me.. and she SHOUTED, I DRIVE MY HUBBY'S CAR, YOU ALL HAPPY, GO HOME LAH!" we already knew there might be a shortage of seats in my FIL's car that's why we wanted to borrow the car in the first place. But that morning she decided to let her hubby drive her and left my FIL's 2nd car at home. *points 3rd finger* Oh yah, the new shop is under her name and her hubby's name...
Anyway, we are only allowed to borrow the car on weekends coz the sales lady who works for my FIL needs to use the car on weekdays. Recently my HB got reservist and he needs to travel from the west where we stay to the east. He was supposed to report to camp at 5am... so he decided to borrow my FIL's 2nd car... coz with a little arrangement, the sales lady could drive my FIL's car instead. But the (*$_#(&%#(^&*# SIL of mine asked my HB how much rent we want to give her dad for taking her car away? *points 3rd finger* its not her car in the first place... Guess what? her hubby just sold his car and is now driving my FIL's 2nd car... Got like this one meh?? My FIL's daughter has 2 cars and we take BUS?? And his family likes to have fucntions, occuring almost once a month and its almost always in the east. We need to take cab there while my SIL drives 1 car and her hubby drives another car... and my FIL will fetch my MIL and my youngest SIL along... so its like 3 cars from the same location (they are staying at my IL's place, remember?) while we take a cab there and back? NO LOGIC!!!
Now my MIL is busy looking after her 2 grand daughters. Next time when I give birth, i doubt she will help me... My SIL will not allow her to help me... So when I have my child, I will have to look after him/her myself.
My evil plan is: Since we got no car right, no need to bring my child to visit them, coz ma huan. And since mu IL's house got no room for me hor, my child cannot sleep in the living room what... so no need to go lor... Anyway, if i dun work, my HB will have difficulty financially... so we were planning of shifting to my parent's place lor... he said his parents will not be happy abt it... but i said... LOOK, UR BIL ALSO STAYING WITH HIS IN LAWS MAH, WHERE GOT LOSE FACE? ... and if we are staying with my parents, they cannot come visit as and when they are happy... coz its my parent's place, they cannot intrude anyhow they like... so good lor... they wanna pamper their daughter, let the daughter chase us out of the company, took over the car and took away our room at my IL's place, they let her shout at us right... good lor, they wun be able to see their grandchild borned by me lor.. anyway they are busy with their 2 grand daughters liao mah... where got time for me... den too bad lor...
Wah!! feels so good to vent it all out... heheh... sorry, i very cheong hei one... suffered too much injustice...
There was once when HB and I were paktoring, she demanded a confrontation with me... so we went to a relative's house and I was made to sit in a corner where she drilled me and wants me to give her explanations why I dun let her brother go home... its like... we paktoring what... we need to go out to shop, watch movies, eat and stuff mah... she had a short cut coz she got pregnant, our fault meh?? She dunno what is pak tor meh?? She dated alot of men and had relations with the men also mah...
B4 our wedding, my MIL told us that the room at their place will be forever kept there so that we can go back to stay... So she made a plan and got herself pregnant again. She just gave birth, and i back counted 40 weeks and its on the weekend my MIL said the room is ours!! now my SIL said we do not deserve the room and she has 2 kids liao, she told my MIL's maid to throw everything in the room away and she made the room her's.
I BTH her that much that my HB sacrificed and quit from his father's company. Previously, his dad bought him a car to share with another colleague... but since he quitted, he asked his dad to take back the car... So my SIL said its her car lor... but my FIL said we can use the car whenever we want to... so everytime we need the car, we have to call her to ask for permission. There was one case when my FIL told us to take the car to visit my granny in law... she did not know and told us to bring the car back to her... den she shouted at us for the reason why we stole her car. I was super pissed!
On my wedding day, when she poured tea for me to drink, she just shouted at me "CHA" she was supposed to call me big sweep, but till now, she dun talk to me at all.. when she wants me to do things for her, she calls my HB to instruct me to do things... *points 3rd finger*
On my wedding day, at the dinner, she treated it like her's (she did not have a wedding dinner coz she shot-gun case, throw face mah... so no dinner). She was drinking so much and making so much noise... she was drunk at the end of the day... whenever we cheers, she will push me out from the picture... my HB's "brothers" all saw what happened.. and one of them will keep a hand behind me so that I dun fall. And guess what... when the pictures came out, she is in each and every foto. I was either not in the foto or in the corner... she is almost always in the middle of the foto. *PISSED*
Last month, we tried to borrow the car, she refused to let us have it... The very next day, my FIL opened another new shop, so we asked my FIL to fetch us... when we were about to go home, we started walking to my FIL's car.... she stopped us and shouted "YOU TWO CANNOT TAKE MRT HOME AH?? SO NEAR?? I WANT TO GO HOME ALSO. DAD's CAR NO SPACE" We were right outside the new shop! so many people were looking at us. Who does she think she is?? I walked off... and my FIL saw me.. and she SHOUTED, I DRIVE MY HUBBY'S CAR, YOU ALL HAPPY, GO HOME LAH!" we already knew there might be a shortage of seats in my FIL's car that's why we wanted to borrow the car in the first place. But that morning she decided to let her hubby drive her and left my FIL's 2nd car at home. *points 3rd finger* Oh yah, the new shop is under her name and her hubby's name...
Anyway, we are only allowed to borrow the car on weekends coz the sales lady who works for my FIL needs to use the car on weekdays. Recently my HB got reservist and he needs to travel from the west where we stay to the east. He was supposed to report to camp at 5am... so he decided to borrow my FIL's 2nd car... coz with a little arrangement, the sales lady could drive my FIL's car instead. But the (*$_#(&%#(^&*# SIL of mine asked my HB how much rent we want to give her dad for taking her car away? *points 3rd finger* its not her car in the first place... Guess what? her hubby just sold his car and is now driving my FIL's 2nd car... Got like this one meh?? My FIL's daughter has 2 cars and we take BUS?? And his family likes to have fucntions, occuring almost once a month and its almost always in the east. We need to take cab there while my SIL drives 1 car and her hubby drives another car... and my FIL will fetch my MIL and my youngest SIL along... so its like 3 cars from the same location (they are staying at my IL's place, remember?) while we take a cab there and back? NO LOGIC!!!
Now my MIL is busy looking after her 2 grand daughters. Next time when I give birth, i doubt she will help me... My SIL will not allow her to help me... So when I have my child, I will have to look after him/her myself.
My evil plan is: Since we got no car right, no need to bring my child to visit them, coz ma huan. And since mu IL's house got no room for me hor, my child cannot sleep in the living room what... so no need to go lor... Anyway, if i dun work, my HB will have difficulty financially... so we were planning of shifting to my parent's place lor... he said his parents will not be happy abt it... but i said... LOOK, UR BIL ALSO STAYING WITH HIS IN LAWS MAH, WHERE GOT LOSE FACE? ... and if we are staying with my parents, they cannot come visit as and when they are happy... coz its my parent's place, they cannot intrude anyhow they like... so good lor... they wanna pamper their daughter, let the daughter chase us out of the company, took over the car and took away our room at my IL's place, they let her shout at us right... good lor, they wun be able to see their grandchild borned by me lor.. anyway they are busy with their 2 grand daughters liao mah... where got time for me... den too bad lor...
Wah!! feels so good to vent it all out... heheh... sorry, i very cheong hei one... suffered too much injustice...
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Ting
Well-Known Member
hi jayme, ive read ya story n i really feel tt ya SIL sucks la...but, maybe ya PIL don really hv a choice? n i think u shldnt deprive them of seeing ya future baby. i dont think it is right, how wud ya hubby feel? ya SIL is so old le, ya PIL may not be able to stop her from doing what she does..maybe they got advice her but she dont listen??
if u move to ya parent's place, n they wanna visit let them, if they don wan to, then forget it lor...abt your SIL, she is aldy a mother of 2 yet she is still so childish n immature then don be bothered abt her, less interaction less conflicts...when she finally grow up, she will understand..if she doesnt, then too bad for her lor.
*hugs* to u.
if u move to ya parent's place, n they wanna visit let them, if they don wan to, then forget it lor...abt your SIL, she is aldy a mother of 2 yet she is still so childish n immature then don be bothered abt her, less interaction less conflicts...when she finally grow up, she will understand..if she doesnt, then too bad for her lor.
*hugs* to u.
mae
Active Member
Hi Jayme,
You don't have to stoop down on the level of your SIL. Ignore her as much as possible if she throws temper on you. I know it's not easy to be with people such like her but the least that you can do to not put you hubby caught in the middle is to be more patient. She is still your dh sister, it will just cause so much conflicts in the family if you will mind her ungreatful behaviour. Don't deprive them of their to see your kiddo. Teach your kid to be very respectful to older people so that they will know that your child learns good moral values from you.
You don't have to stoop down on the level of your SIL. Ignore her as much as possible if she throws temper on you. I know it's not easy to be with people such like her but the least that you can do to not put you hubby caught in the middle is to be more patient. She is still your dh sister, it will just cause so much conflicts in the family if you will mind her ungreatful behaviour. Don't deprive them of their to see your kiddo. Teach your kid to be very respectful to older people so that they will know that your child learns good moral values from you.
jedamum
Member
I agree.
what goes around, comes around. revenge is not necessary sweet. IF she is in the wrong, she will get her desserts when the time comes...it need not necessary must come from you. She may have some reasons for being 'nasty' (maybe was treated unjustly last time? maybe was treated with 'tinted glasses' cos she shotgun? etc etc), cos why would anyone want to conscienciously create so much trouble?
Jayme
New Member
Yah lah, I know... was very angry after typing my essay. hehehe...
I wun stop them from seeing my kids... its more like, they wanna see, they come lor.. i wun invite them nor will i push them away. My HB knows that the sister is a brad, but blood is thicker den water (me) mah... he dun wanna scold her..
As for why she is treating us this way, very simple.. My FIL is a businessman with 4 shops, 2 factories and 2 houses (one in SG, one in JB). Total net worth of his assets are ard 5-7 Mil. Money is always the root of all evils. See the link?? She chased my HB out of the company, she took over the company's main role, she process the car, and now took away our room in my in law's place.. She is slowly cutting our ties with my in laws. Can u imagine, 1 share = how many MILs? Now she is stopping her younger sister from seeing guys. She kept saying that the younger sister is too young. She does not approve her of dating. See the link again?? She said she is scared that the youngest sister is too young and since kor kor (my hb) dun care abt the family anymore, she is now forced to take the responsibilities of looking after mei mei's life and assets. See the link??
As in why my FIL is scared of her? Simple. She brain washes them... She stays with them and everyday, she tells them that her brother and I dun care abt the family anymore. She complains to them that we dun want to help her do some things... that we are not filial... She told her dad that kor kor (my hb) dun want the company anymore... and since she one of the main heads of the company, she deserves the company. She said my HB gave up on the company and has not contributed at all... So tells my FIL that she plees with my HB to help her out in work, but my HB dun want to... So my FIL thinks that if he chase this daughter away, he will lose another child since he already lost his unfilial son. See the link?
I am minimizing the chances of seeing her... but she uses this oppurtunity to say that we dun care... But why should we meet up when she likes to shout at me? I wasn't born to be shouted at.
I wun stop them from seeing my kids... its more like, they wanna see, they come lor.. i wun invite them nor will i push them away. My HB knows that the sister is a brad, but blood is thicker den water (me) mah... he dun wanna scold her..
As for why she is treating us this way, very simple.. My FIL is a businessman with 4 shops, 2 factories and 2 houses (one in SG, one in JB). Total net worth of his assets are ard 5-7 Mil. Money is always the root of all evils. See the link?? She chased my HB out of the company, she took over the company's main role, she process the car, and now took away our room in my in law's place.. She is slowly cutting our ties with my in laws. Can u imagine, 1 share = how many MILs? Now she is stopping her younger sister from seeing guys. She kept saying that the younger sister is too young. She does not approve her of dating. See the link again?? She said she is scared that the youngest sister is too young and since kor kor (my hb) dun care abt the family anymore, she is now forced to take the responsibilities of looking after mei mei's life and assets. See the link??
As in why my FIL is scared of her? Simple. She brain washes them... She stays with them and everyday, she tells them that her brother and I dun care abt the family anymore. She complains to them that we dun want to help her do some things... that we are not filial... She told her dad that kor kor (my hb) dun want the company anymore... and since she one of the main heads of the company, she deserves the company. She said my HB gave up on the company and has not contributed at all... So tells my FIL that she plees with my HB to help her out in work, but my HB dun want to... So my FIL thinks that if he chase this daughter away, he will lose another child since he already lost his unfilial son. See the link?
I am minimizing the chances of seeing her... but she uses this oppurtunity to say that we dun care... But why should we meet up when she likes to shout at me? I wasn't born to be shouted at.
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Ting
Well-Known Member
jayme, maybe u n ya hubby can hv a good talk with ya PIL. seriously, with such ppl in the house, u cant do much oso... cos she is living with your in laws. i think ya in laws may hv misunderstood the situation, tt's y they might be treatin u more coldly? make an effort to invite THEM (w/o ya SIL) to ya place to hv dinner, or go out to hv dinner lor. then they wun be so easily brain washed by ya SIL cos they see the care n concern n effort made byu...they maybe old, but they r not lil kids....
Jayme
New Member
My ILs are almost always at work. Their family day is Sundays and my SIL wun be at work as well. When we are them out for meals, they will ask the whole family including my 2 SILs, my SIL's hubby, the 2 kids and the maid along also. They believe must do things as a family. In other words, see my PILs = see my SIL and her children. (Sometimes if her hubby see that its celebrating my HB's birthday or to celebrate something for us, he wun turn up, coz its wasting his time mah)
badtzzz
Member
why sometimes we can't have in-laws that were so nice like others MILs...
My MIL is not working, being a tai tai at home, she does nth..only cleans, wipe the hse, watch drama and don't even bother to cook at all. Furthermore, she is physically n mentally well. Recently, my hubby ask his mum if she's willingly to take care of our baby after my ML...got rejected...Y can't his parents help out? Seems like all pushing to my parents side...
My MIL is not working, being a tai tai at home, she does nth..only cleans, wipe the hse, watch drama and don't even bother to cook at all. Furthermore, she is physically n mentally well. Recently, my hubby ask his mum if she's willingly to take care of our baby after my ML...got rejected...Y can't his parents help out? Seems like all pushing to my parents side...
