Does anyone regret having your baby?

[barang_square]

I never like children. Now I have a 3 months of baby. My feeling is very mix. He is very cute but sometime I feel that I have a big chain tie to my leg.

Taking care of him like feeding him, bathing him etc is fine with me. But I find very tiring playing with him and talking to him.

Does anyone feel the same?

 

[CanCanMum]

i would say tat its more of mixed feelings than regret alone.

especially if u r sleep-deprived, will start to think tat way.

this is something unhealthy though, because it is something negative, negative feelings has its side-effects, or rather consequences...but as long as we stayed on the right track, just complain abit about this and that it is still alright.

just like sometimes when our child is sick, u will feel sympathy and restless the whole day too? Canx concentrate on work even..

And also if sometimes we quarrel with husb we will also feel regrets for marrying him....its the same idea.

so if u asked me i would say yes, i do feel the same sometimes.

 

[sherylicious]

I regret marrying him, but nv ever regret having my gal...

I used to regret.. But when I c how she come up to me and snuggle up to me and call me "ah-mi", i totally hate myself for actuali hating her in the 1st place..

I noe how u feel.. I m a veri freedom mum.. But nw i gt her i m all chained up... But i will nv ever regret.. Cos she is my pride and my joy...

 

[autumn82]

I used to have that tots when DS was 1mth+ coz I was too stressed up w looking after 2 kids and total bfing DS & seriously lack of sleep. I never really took care of DD when she was born coz we sent her to nanny's place. So to look after a newborn + a 4yr old was challenging to me.

But once I knew how to handle them, I find myself silly for thinking that way. But ya, it's like what Cancanmum said.. It's just mixed feelings. U will pass this phrase soon. Try to look on the brighter side ya...

 

[Dee Ho]

As a new mum when BB is abt only 1 mth plus ... I ask myself did I make the correct decision? What I ve gotten myself in this situation!! Grrrrr!!

But as mths pass...coping and learning each day with him and to be a mummy to my BB... I start to grow to love it ...strange though... all my -ve tots of being a mummy and to ve him seems to vapour away....

Now though I m still coping and tired at times... my BB is the "motivation" :shyxxx:
I tink its a tough learning process (physically & mentally) for us new mummy (or mummy coping with more than 1 kids)... at least for me...Cheer up!! Yr bb ll be yr joy as times grow by....

 

[mamapenguin]

Imagine how I feel? My pregnancy is completely unplanned. Just a few weeks b4 finding out I was preggie I had declared to my then BF I don't want kids coz I don't want that kind of commitment & responsibility. Besides, he say he didn't want to get married anytime soon. Plus I also can't stand the sound of screaming kids.
See wat happen now? Certainly won't choose abortion. no way. Pressured to get married b4 bb born by my parents. Religion is a mess. Wedding not done. Waiting to pop but don't know if happy or not. I'm scared I wont be able to cope with the idea of being a mother. I've conflicts of emotions now.
I'm just lucky my hb is a good man. he admits he's still not ready too. we just have to make the best out of watever life throws at us.

 

[BudgetMum]

I never like children. Now I have a 3 months of baby. My feeling is very mix. He is very cute but sometime I feel that I have a big chain tie to my leg.

Taking care of him like feeding him, bathing him etc is fine with me. But I find very tiring playing with him and talking to him.

Does anyone feel the same?

feelings & affections will develops through time... ...

of course, u need to put in some efforts too but for your bb that comes very naturally

dun let this feelings linger in ur mind for too lone as it will affects your family relationships

I've never regretted having children though I do "blame" them for the size i'm struck with now but they r angels no matter how naughty they r -- i've been through my 1st kid was alredi pri 1.

 

[BudgetMum]

Imagine how I feel? My pregnancy is completely unplanned. Just a few weeks b4 finding out I was preggie I had declared to my then BF I don't want kids coz I don't want that kind of commitment & responsibility. Besides, he say he didn't want to get married anytime soon. Plus I also can't stand the sound of screaming kids.
See wat happen now? Certainly won't choose abortion. no way. Pressured to get married b4 bb born by my parents. Religion is a mess. Wedding not done. Waiting to pop but don't know if happy or not. I'm scared I wont be able to cope with the idea of being a mother. I've conflicts of emotions now.
I'm just lucky my hb is a good man. he admits he's still not ready too. we just have to make the best out of watever life throws at us.

good 4 u! at least u feel that ur hubby is a good man -- tt's very impt in a young marriage like urs... ...

i've an unplanned pregnancy too tt's y it took us so long to hav no. 2, cos we r both financially unstable & I was retrenched when i was preg 7 yrs back... ...

i hav many friends like u committed into marriage & parenthood due to unplanned preg but they r happy & ddn't wait too long to hav no. 2 (like me, i'm probably kiase-type)
they r not well-to-do or perfect ppl, but they work things out... ...

wish u health & happiness!!

 

[January84]

I don regret having baby. to me, he is my precious although in the beginning, its very very tiring, no day no night, but looking at him just melt my heart some how..

 

[Porukadotzu]

i don't regret having a baby and taking care since i always wanted to have one.. i just hate the routine becoming a housewife haha.. the washing, the cleaning stuff, and don't hv time to do my own things..:embarrassed:

 

[CanCanMum]

i don't regret having a baby and taking care since i always wanted to have one.. i just hate the routine becoming a housewife haha.. the washing, the cleaning stuff, and don't hv time to do my own things..:embarrassed:

Hi Porukadotzu (wah, yr nick v difficult to spell, esp i got hi chance of typo error - too dependent on spell check programs)

anyway u wanna join our 1st outing? See our busy thread:


http://www.mummysg.com/forums/f48/frist-time-meetup-discussion-ideas-7578/#post79612

 

[WeeFee's_Mummy]

I never like children. Now I have a 3 months of baby. My feeling is very mix. He is very cute but sometime I feel that I have a big chain tie to my leg.

Taking care of him like feeding him, bathing him etc is fine with me. But I find very tiring playing with him and talking to him.

Does anyone feel the same?

i was rather bluesy in my first month confinement. was always asking "wot did i get myself into??". regretted somewhat not practising enough birth control.

but you know (& i'm sure many mothers echo my sentiments), as time passes & i watch my bb grow & he responds more & more to me, i can no longer imagine life without him.

i used to waste my weekends lounging around at home trying to savour every minute of the free time i had before going back to work on Monday ... & when Monday came always Monday blues.

but now i spend my weekend taking care of my bb, going out & having fun as a family even on Sundays. & it doesn't matter how tired i am or how many TV shows i've missed ... or the fact that i can't catch late movies on Saturday nights anymore & no more Monday blues (somehow) ... because i've mended my soul - the one that wears thin on weekdays from work - by filling it with the joy & love i have for the two boys (one 4 mth baby, the other BIG PERPETUAL baby) in my life.

it's crazy. just a year ago i never thought i'd be this "motherly" =P

 

[Lotus]

I never like children. Now I have a 3 months of baby. My feeling is very mix. He is very cute but sometime I feel that I have a big chain tie to my leg.

Taking care of him like feeding him, bathing him etc is fine with me. But I find very tiring playing with him and talking to him.

Does anyone feel the same?

Hardly anyone tells you that once you have a baby it is a ball and chain!!! This is exactly how I described my life a few years ago to friends, whatever you do now you need to think about someone else.

I always compare it to having a new job but no manual that tells you what to do in every situation. Honestly even though I have 2, I am not into young babies. I find them very dull - all they do is eat, cry and hopefully sleep. As they develop a personality and you get to know them it does get better - they are more interactive and capable you get somewhat of a life back.

Do you get any time away from the baby? There are some mothers who can spend every hour of every day with their child, but for me I need some me time. If you currently don't get time to yourself try to have your husband look after your child so you can do something other than be a mother.

 

[sleepymama]

No regrets at all. In fact I am very thankful and blessed to have my two kids. All the sleeplessness, tiredness and frustrations etc are no match for the love I have for them. I am sure all mommies love their kids enough to sacrifise time, energy, sleep, freedom, etc etc for their children. Yes! Our kids are our pride and joy indeed! Be thankful they are gifts from God, raise them well and fill their emotional tanks full with your love

 

[Dee Ho]

Hardly anyone tells you that once you have a baby it is a ball and chain!!! This is exactly how I described my life a few years ago to friends, whatever you do now you need to think about someone else.

I always compare it to having a new job but no manual that tells you what to do in every situation. Honestly even though I have 2, I am not into young babies. I find them very dull - all they do is eat, cry and hopefully sleep. As they develop a personality and you get to know them it does get better - they are more interactive and capable you get somewhat of a life back.

Do you get any time away from the baby? There are some mothers who can spend every hour of every day with their child, but for me I need some me time. If you currently don't get time to yourself try to have your husband look after your child so you can do something other than be a mother.

Yes... I cant agree more with Lotus... veri tru... give yrself some ME time... get some help to take care of yr bb for awhile... do someting that u use to do before having bb... maybi ll relax u and make u better...

I always take leave (clearing my leave)to go for massage or shopping... that make me perk up again.. to tell myself I still ve some life... Hahahahaha

 

[JuzAngel]

They'll grow on u.. :we3wubclub:
As time passes u'll feel dat seeing him/ her growing up is the most wonderful thing in the world.. :weyes: seeing them growing up or simply smiling at u is worthless:red:

Dun worry u r juz tired out fm time to time. Take a day off (pass to bb sitter or MIL) n relax ur self, in no time u'll yearning to see them again! ancing_wub:

 

[mskathy]

i dun say i regret but rather not really ready for 1.. to start off.. i tried for a bb becos my mum wanted 1 (she is having advance cancer).. i was blessed with 1 soon after my wedding..

unfortunately my mum did not manage to see her 1 grandchild... i was devasted. during her funeral i realise that the objective of having bb was gone but i was carrying my bb in the last trimester den..

after giving birth.. i love my bb.. but i hated myself cos i missed my mum even more.. den i had inflicted stretch marks, tummy, piles, discomfort, sore breast.. it was really a too much for a perfectionist like me.. i nvr looked so ugly all my life..

i wanted to be a stayed at home mummy... to rest mentally and physically for all tat happen the past yr.. but my hubby was not confident to support me.. i'm doom.. dunno wat to expect in my near future.

 

[SH74]

i think it's a common feeling for all new mommies. the mixed feeling n feeling chained up.

i feel that way too. but it'll get better soon.

 

[CanCanMum]

yeah so true...

to be frank we were not ready for our boy too, when we conceived him...too fast to accept it oso....

and during pregnancy just live life as it is...

and when he is born we dont even know how to handle a baby, carry him or bathe him - everything gotta learn from scratch....

so tats why sometimes we will think "why do i bring such burden to myself? Shd i be living this kinda life? Why do i get married in the 1st place?????" u noe, those feelings came brushing in.....

But when u see yr kids grow up slowly u will become more motherly and such feelings will soon be gone....