If your husband have affair do u give him a 2nd chance?

Spiralng

Spiralng

Well-Known Member
Indra said:
well it all depends on the extend of the affair....

if the husband regrets his decision as is willing to make the marriage work..then by all means i will forgive but will be truthful that it will take time to forget and time to build the trust back...if husband is willing and agreeable to that, then why not especially if there are kids involve...

however despite the forgiveness, if the husband carries on the extra martial affair..then too bad la.. he and the affair are so going to suffer in my hands..haha...
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Hmmm...just curious what kind of suffering do u hv in mind???:001_302:
 
SunShine07

SunShine07

Member
happymummyo7 said:
at least now. boy still small. the impact not that deep.. i mean like, i dont think there's anyone who can remember every exact details when they were 5 lo..
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after reading your reply, it really kinda let me make awake. I really don't want me son to witness all these violence in future....

I had moved back to singapore on thurs. Happen on wed afternoon when he scolded me in public just becos he said i don;t wan to answer his phone when i don even have my hp with me. Using vuagual words on me whichi i hated most. And he walk away without giving me back all the baby's stuff like milk and his clothing and diaper.....my son got no cloth to change and enough milk to drink! he can just walk away like that and hence, i decided to stay in singapore since i already here.

I told my parent that i can't live with him anymore, and becso i reallly afraid that my son grew up ina voilent enviroment.....

Now i moved back, to my surprise, this time he is willing to let go. He did beg me to go back to him, but this time, i really harden my heart....and he walked away with a very sad look....kinda of heartbroken also when i sees him like that....but i reelly don want to be control by him and dint wan quarrel and don wan anymore violence....

He is now all alone in malaysia....when i itot of those hapy moment we once share i still feel very sad....but.......:no choice
 
edy

edy

Administrator
Staff member
Be strong lady!

Whatever decision you made, you can be sure we are here to offer our listening ear (in this case eyes to read) :Dancing_wub:

How is your son coping without his dad? Did he ask for him? and are you going to fight the custody?
 
happymummyo7

happymummyo7

Member
liang`jia said:
after reading your reply, it really kinda let me make awake. I really don't want me son to witness all these violence in future....

I had moved back to singapore on thurs. Happen on wed afternoon when he scolded me in public just becos he said i don;t wan to answer his phone when i don even have my hp with me. Using vuagual words on me whichi i hated most. And he walk away without giving me back all the baby's stuff like milk and his clothing and diaper.....my son got no cloth to change and enough milk to drink! he can just walk away like that and hence, i decided to stay in singapore since i already here.

I told my parent that i can't live with him anymore, and becso i reallly afraid that my son grew up ina voilent enviroment.....

Now i moved back, to my surprise, this time he is willing to let go. He did beg me to go back to him, but this time, i really harden my heart....and he walked away with a very sad look....kinda of heartbroken also when i sees him like that....but i reelly don want to be control by him and dint wan quarrel and don wan anymore violence....

He is now all alone in malaysia....when i itot of those hapy moment we once share i still feel very sad....but.......:no choice
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every mummy wants the best for their child.. and sadly, most of the time, we have to sacrifice.
think on the good side. maybe this will make him really wake up and reflect on himself. who knows. perhaps he will work hard, change his attitude. and maybe two years later, you two might end up together again. and this time, he will be a better husband, and a better daddy.
if not. you can tell yourself, thank god you made the decision to leave.
if really got fate, go one round still will back together de. no fate, earlier end lesser hurt.
forget about the unhappiness. and keep the happy memories deep deep in your heart. at least, cheng jing yong you. :001_302:
to be honest. for me. at times i also miss my ex. miss the times we shared. miss how he changed for me, things he did for me and all. but i know im doing the right thing. for my precious and myself. and now, i dont bother bout what people think of me anymore.
 
Spiralng

Spiralng

Well-Known Member
liang`jia said:
after reading your reply, it really kinda let me make awake. I really don't want me son to witness all these violence in future....

I had moved back to singapore on thurs. Happen on wed afternoon when he scolded me in public just becos he said i don;t wan to answer his phone when i don even have my hp with me. Using vuagual words on me whichi i hated most. And he walk away without giving me back all the baby's stuff like milk and his clothing and diaper.....my son got no cloth to change and enough milk to drink! he can just walk away like that and hence, i decided to stay in singapore since i already here.

I told my parent that i can't live with him anymore, and becso i reallly afraid that my son grew up ina voilent enviroment.....

Now i moved back, to my surprise, this time he is willing to let go. He did beg me to go back to him, but this time, i really harden my heart....and he walked away with a very sad look....kinda of heartbroken also when i sees him like that....but i reelly don want to be control by him and dint wan quarrel and don wan anymore violence....

He is now all alone in malaysia....when i itot of those hapy moment we once share i still feel very sad....but.......:no choice
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Time will heal everything. Keep those happy moments you hv so that u dun hate him so much. Move on with your life, there are much better things ahead. U hv make a very important move and that is to leave him. There is so much ahead of u, dun look back...cos the gd things are in front move forward be strong for yourself and your son.
 
E

EnFlor

Well-Known Member
jal said:
Before leaving the house, probably I will give him 2 tight slaps & use a scissors to......

Actually my father-in-law had an affair before, so I am very worried that it is in my hubby's genes.......... Pray not.
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Woah, jal u r one garang woman....fierce huh! :001_302:

This is what i know, for a person to behave in a particular way/s. Genetics alone is not solely responsible for it. It has to be a combination with environmental factors (for a case like affair) Pull environmental factors eg: more sayang and pamper frm potential 3rd party, job-related matter like more travelling, strong memories over past love life, etc. Push environmental factors eg: pressure at home, spouse has lost the attractiveness or zest, he/she pays lesser attention to the other.

In a way, we sort of have a control over our environmental factors lah. So, don't worry too much over the genetic cause yah....perhaps play a more active role in deterring bad environmental influences that can shake one's relationship.
 
VroomVroomBoys

VroomVroomBoys

Alpha Male
Domique said:
Today I learn something!
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... that the thousands of ladies-in-waiting did not only rely on the monthly or quarterly visits by the Emperor to bring about that satisfied smile on their face?
:rofl: :rofl:
 
Spiralng

Spiralng

Well-Known Member
VroomVroomBoys said:
Wrong ... eunuch only gets their balls removed.
What she is attempting ... is to annihilate the Sacred Bird.
:rofl: :rofl:
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ha ha ha Smart Man...or rather boy...?!! I guess every guy know what will be removed when faced with a pair of scissiors.:tlaugh:
 
jal

jal

Member
EnFlor said:
Woah, jal u r one garang woman....fierce huh! :001_302:

This is what i know, for a person to behave in a particular way/s. Genetics alone is not solely responsible for it. It has to be a combination with environmental factors (for a case like affair) Pull environmental factors eg: more sayang and pamper frm potential 3rd party, job-related matter like more travelling, strong memories over past love life, etc. Push environmental factors eg: pressure at home, spouse has lost the attractiveness or zest, he/she pays lesser attention to the other.

In a way, we sort of have a control over our environmental factors lah. So, don't worry too much over the genetic cause yah....perhaps play a more active role in deterring bad environmental influences that can shake one's relationship.
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I just say say only lah... Haha!
 
*cynn.89llaluby

*cynn.89llaluby

Member
Wrong ... eunuch only gets their balls removed. What she is attempting ... is to annihilate the Sacred Bird. . . . . . lesson learnt too ......... . . . . aiyo....... happy mummy........ life's too short for rregrets de....... hahhaso if one day one of de thread belong to miie....... dont worrrrry i'll move on quick....haha!
 
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Spiralng

Spiralng

Well-Known Member
*cynn.89llaluby said:
Wrong ... eunuch only gets their balls removed. What she is attempting ... is to annihilate the Sacred Bird. lesson learnt too aiyo....... happy mummy........ life's too short for rregrets de....... hahhaso if one day one of de thread bbelong to miie....... dont worrrrry i'll move on quick....haha!
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CHIO!!! hope it doesn't happen to u or any mummies. Dammed suay.... but still it's always gd to standby a pair of scissor in case.....
 
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