If your husband have affair do u give him a 2nd chance?

[VroomVroomBoys]

I am now planning to leave him for good secretly with my son so that he can't find us, i dun care about how 'ke lian' he will be all alone in his big house here!ancing_peevedoff:i always run and go back to him again becos i am afraid that he alone very pitiful loh or he might even kill himself....now i hope he die soon!!!

Sorry for being nosey ... but that's why you have now shifted to Malaysia?
I'm sure you'd hafta come back to Singapore when your boy is old enough for school, right?

So, instead of running away, I think you should find the determination to "harden" your heart ... & do what's best for your boy & yourself.
Good Luck ... :wink: :wink:

 

[Spiralng]

I knew my hubby when he is not even 18yrs old...Maybe we have been thru many things together and always supported him on whatever he's doing... My senior colleagues at tat time aso tell me he is a blue chip...wahaha...I nv stressed him but of cos we do quarrel... And for money wise, I dun asked him to pay everything and I dun go for all Cs, if he got more pocket money tat time, he will spend on us but I will of cos pay for food too even we are having dinner outside...but now so nice tat I dun even have to pay for one single meal when we are dining outside, he now have a good salary and good job...wahaha... So his money pay for household thing and food, my money is for my baby clothes and my clothes only...

I can only say one word: GOD must have loved u very much:001_302: I am so happy for u.

 

[Spiralng]

sigh, you know what? it was that woman who stop everything. My hb still keep trying to contact her!:wong7:I was damn heartbroken that time, and very hurt, despite going thru so many things with him! And the whole thing was like he is 'si lian' and i dun know why i am so damn stupid to standby him!:nah: I regret i didn't ask for divorce at that time! Because that time he dun give a damn to my ds:bmad: i really hate him manz!!!

After that still treat try to use chopper to kill me when we quarrel. This was when i totally give up hope on him......

I am now planning to leave him for good secretly with my son so that he can't find us, i dun care about how 'ke lian' he will be all alone in his big house here!ancing_peevedoff:i always run and go back to him again becos i am afraid that he alone very pitiful loh or he might even kill himself....now i hope he die soon!!!

You are a very strong woman, so sad to hear u r stuck with a lousy husband. No matter what u do, let him killed himself and dun try to snatch the chopper from him and end his life fast. U hv my support in whatever decision u made.

 

[SunShine07]

Sorry for being nosey ... but that's why you have now shifted to Malaysia?
I'm sure you'd hafta come back to Singapore when your boy is old enough for school, right?

So, instead of running away, I think you should find the determination to "harden" your heart ... & do what's best for your boy & yourself.
Good Luck ... :wink: :wink:

No, we are staying in malaysia now. He bought a house here. He is a malaysian, singapore PR.

I wan to go back to singapore with my son. I wan to give my son singapore education also

 

[SunShine07]

You are a very strong woman, so sad to hear u r stuck with a lousy husband. No matter what u do, let him killed himself and dun try to snatch the chopper from him and end his life fast. U hv my support in whatever decision u made.

thanks~~ but the thing that hold me back is the relationship between my son and my hb. Ok, infact, my hb dun know how to take care of him, but he played with my son only. But wheneve i sees them playing happily, my heart will soften....

you see, the realationship that turn sour is me and my hb, my hb still have love for my son....

Sigh, i am in very confused...'wo hen mei yong hor':nah:

 

[Spiralng]

thanks~~ but the thing that hold me back is the relationship between my son and my hb. Ok, infact, my hb dun know how to take care of him, but he played with my son only. But wheneve i sees them playing happily, my heart will soften....

you see, the realationship that turn sour is me and my hb, my hb still have love for my son....

Sigh, i am in very confused...'wo hen mei yong hor':nah:

sad but true whatever decision you make will affect your son. Time will heal everything.

 

[SunShine07]

sad but true whatever decision you make will affect your son. Time will heal everything.

but since my son still younger, i doubt he know what going on, but when he is older, and has feeling towards ppl, then that time isn't it too late as well???

I am afraid i am too selfish to make this kinda decision...:embarrassed:

 

[Spiralng]

but since my son still younger, i doubt he know what going on, but when he is older, and has feeling towards ppl, then that time isn't it too late as well???

I am afraid i am too selfish to make this kinda decision...:embarrassed:

Children no matter what age, can feel the difference. Most important thing is your happiness cos if you are not happy, staying together and quarrel everyday is also not gd for the kid. I am not suggesting that u leave him but what i mean was if u r happy, your son will feel it.

I hv a friend who got married at 20 and after marriage, give birth and become a SAHM. Somehow along the line, their marriage broke down and she decide to divorce her husband cos firstly, her husband hv affairs and secondly, her husband make her bankrupt. She moved to her mum's place and struggle to support her daughter(7yrs). I guess she must be very fustrated with life cos in the end, she neglect her daughter, choosing to go pubbing and shopping rather than spend time with her girl. I can see her daughter slowly changed from cheerful and talktive to a quiet and lifeless girl.

I guess your son will support whatever decision you made cos i believe he also wan mummy to be happy.

 

[SunShine07]

Children no matter what age, can feel the difference. Most important thing is your happiness cos if you are not happy, staying together and quarrel everyday is also not gd for the kid. I am not suggesting that u leave him but what i mean was if u r happy, your son will feel it.

I hv a friend who got married at 20 and after marriage, give birth and become a SAHM. Somehow along the line, their marriage broke down and she decide to divorce her husband cos firstly, her husband hv affairs and secondly, her husband make her bankrupt. She moved to her mum's place and struggle to support her daughter(7yrs). I guess she must be very fustrated with life cos in the end, she neglect her daughter, choosing to go pubbing and shopping rather than spend time with her girl. I can see her daughter slowly changed from cheerful and talktive to a quiet and lifeless girl.

I guess your son will support whatever decision you made cos i believe he also wan mummy to be happy.

We didn't always quarrel, but when we quarrel, it a really bad one, and can lead to physical.....my son ever seen him using the chopper. It is really difficult to forget it.

I am afraid, one day he will kill me and my son if i ever provoke him again. everynight i tot of this and that's one of the reason i wanted to leave him incase one day~:embarrassed:

 

[Dream*Mum]

Something to share about me last time i was married once and now with my new BF aka hubby...

i get married at the age of 21 my ex-husband was 1 years older than me R.O.M on 2006, Chinese wedding 2007 june. after a week of our chinese wedding he told me he wanted to divorce cos he fall in love with his colleague a SG girl and the girl know he was married she also came to our wedding dinner, he was saying on our chinese wedding date he was thinking to stop all the dinner thing but he say can't bare to see his mother not happy. (i was like all rubbish~) i did told him before you want to have affair outside don't bring home don't get her pregnant or serious but that girl got pregnant after my wedding. She found out she having triples and beg me to let go my husband and give it to her due to her baby, i was crying none stop sitting down with my mother and my ex husband parent told about it. i choose to let go cos the babys is innocent i don't want the babys to born out without a daddy, after all my separation was done on the date and pack my things back to my own house. I still need to keep it a secret due to my dad have heart problem cannot be stress of angry and sad so up till now keep it a secret, than i heard from my ex-husband mother that my ex-husband ask the girl undergo operation to kill all three babys. they already broke up and now he got new gf leh and i got my new bf aka husband cos now i got pregnant and the baby daddy is belong to my new bf aka husband.

I know alot of people been though alot and i believe we are stronger to face all the problem so be brave and face it.

wish all mother happy :red:womens are the stronger than mens

 

[apollo]

Something to share about me last time i was married once and now with my new BF aka hubby...

i get married at the age of 21 my ex-husband was 1 years older than me R.O.M on 2006, Chinese wedding 2007 june. after a week of our chinese wedding he told me he wanted to divorce cos he fall in love with his colleague a SG girl and the girl know he was married she also came to our wedding dinner, he was saying on our chinese wedding date he was thinking to stop all the dinner thing but he say can't bare to see his mother not happy. (i was like all rubbish~) i did told him before you want to have affair outside don't bring home don't get her pregnant or serious but that girl got pregnant after my wedding. She found out she having triples and beg me to let go my husband and give it to her due to her baby, i was crying none stop sitting down with my mother and my ex husband parent told about it. i choose to let go cos the babys is innocent i don't want the babys to born out without a daddy, after all my separation was done on the date and pack my things back to my own house. I still need to keep it a secret due to my dad have heart problem cannot be stress of angry and sad so up till now keep it a secret, than i heard from my ex-husband mother that my ex-husband ask the girl undergo operation to kill all three babys. they already broke up and now he got new gf leh and i got my new bf aka husband cos now i got pregnant and the baby daddy is belong to my new bf aka husband.

I know alot of people been though alot and i believe we are stronger to face all the problem so be brave and face it.

wish all mother happy :red:womens are the stronger than mens

sry to say tt but i think ur ex-husband is a jerk! thk God u left him!!! ancing_tongue:

 

[Dream*Mum]

sry to say tt but i think ur ex-husband is a jerk! thk God u left him!!! ancing_tongue:

thx~ yup correct lucky i left him and now i choice a guy that very very straigh forward to me.

 

[SunShine07]

thx~ yup correct lucky i left him and now i choice a guy that very very straigh forward to me.

it must be hard on you that time. He is indeed a jerk ilke regina said! But blessings in disguise, you actually found a better man!
ancing_tongue:

 

[Spiralng]

We didn't always quarrel, but when we quarrel, it a really bad one, and can lead to physical.....my son ever seen him using the chopper. It is really difficult to forget it.

I am afraid, one day he will kill me and my son if i ever provoke him again. everynight i tot of this and that's one of the reason i wanted to leave him incase one day~:embarrassed:

I think for the safety of your child, you have to plan carefully.

 

[Spiralng]

Something to share about me last time i was married once and now with my new BF aka hubby...

i get married at the age of 21 my ex-husband was 1 years older than me R.O.M on 2006, Chinese wedding 2007 june. after a week of our chinese wedding he told me he wanted to divorce cos he fall in love with his colleague a SG girl and the girl know he was married she also came to our wedding dinner, he was saying on our chinese wedding date he was thinking to stop all the dinner thing but he say can't bare to see his mother not happy. (i was like all rubbish~) i did told him before you want to have affair outside don't bring home don't get her pregnant or serious but that girl got pregnant after my wedding. She found out she having triples and beg me to let go my husband and give it to her due to her baby, i was crying none stop sitting down with my mother and my ex husband parent told about it. i choose to let go cos the babys is innocent i don't want the babys to born out without a daddy, after all my separation was done on the date and pack my things back to my own house. I still need to keep it a secret due to my dad have heart problem cannot be stress of angry and sad so up till now keep it a secret, than i heard from my ex-husband mother that my ex-husband ask the girl undergo operation to kill all three babys. they already broke up and now he got new gf leh and i got my new bf aka husband cos now i got pregnant and the baby daddy is belong to my new bf aka husband.

I know alot of people been though alot and i believe we are stronger to face all the problem so be brave and face it.

wish all mother happy :red:womens are the stronger than mens

You are so unlucky to hv met such an asshole. On second thoughts, you should thank the SG girl otherwise, you will be beaming with happiness right now with a loving husband and happily rubbing your little tum tum.

 

[Spiralng]

it must be hard on you that time. He is indeed a jerk ilke regina said! But blessings in disguise, you actually found a better man!
ancing_tongue:

Hmm...maybe u can learn from Dream*mum discard the old one so brand new one will appear:001_302:. Frankly, if that man start to get physical every fight, u really hv to take good care of yourself.

 

[Dream*Mum]

You are so unlucky to hv met such an asshole. On second thoughts, you should thank the SG girl otherwise, you will be beaming with happiness right now with a loving husband and happily rubbing your little tum tum.

even to thanks her but i must say one thing i pity her, she been though sadness of lossing the babys but yet my ex-husband INDEED a asshole!

 

[woofy55]

even to thanks her but i must say one thing i pity her, she been though sadness of lossing the babys but yet my ex-husband INDEED a asshole!

Ya.. let him rot himself... U enjoy yr own new life with your hubby and bb... cheers!

 

[woofy55]

We didn't always quarrel, but when we quarrel, it a really bad one, and can lead to physical.....my son ever seen him using the chopper. It is really difficult to forget it.

I am afraid, one day he will kill me and my son if i ever provoke him again. everynight i tot of this and that's one of the reason i wanted to leave him incase one day~:embarrassed:

try to find out more abt women protection against violent hubby... it's scary.. take good care of yrself ... how did your family react? get as much support from your family as possible.

 

[happymummyo7]

sigh, you know what? it was that woman who stop everything. My hb still keep trying to contact her!:wong7:I was damn heartbroken that time, and very hurt, despite going thru so many things with him! And the whole thing was like he is 'si lian' and i dun know why i am so damn stupid to standby him!:nah: I regret i didn't ask for divorce at that time! Because that time he dun give a damn to my ds:bmad: i really hate him manz!!!

After that still treat try to use chopper to kill me when we quarrel. This was when i totally give up hope on him......

I am now planning to leave him for good secretly with my son so that he can't find us, i dun care about how 'ke lian' he will be all alone in his big house here!ancing_peevedoff:i always run and go back to him again becos i am afraid that he alone very pitiful loh or he might even kill himself....now i hope he die soon!!!

wa. i missed the chopper part..
hmm. my papa also got take out knife pull my mama collar threaten to chop her before. that was like dont know how many years ago. i wasnt home to see that. but my younger bro, i think he was only 12, saw the whole quarrel and chopper thing. my parents divorced when we were very young but my mother stayed on with the 'family' cause she feels that we are not old enough to take care of ourself. in the end, all we, the kids, see everyday is, parents quarrel. daddy coming home late. mummy sad sad. till now, i feel guilty that my mama had to sacrifice herself for us. if she had left earlier, she could find a better man who can give her happiness. if we had grow up 'faster'.
my mama finally left the house when i was 16, my didi 12. after the chopper incident. she gave up totally on my dad. my didi hate my dad during then. and it took him quite some time to get over it and accept my father again. i left home shortly after mama left. stay over with my gf then. only go home once awhile to take allowance from papa.
guess thats when my papa realise his mistake. losing the woman. daughter 'run away' from home. son hate him and ignore him, treat him like enemy. but its too late la. during then, my relation with my didi also not good.
things improve bit by bit. when i had problems outside. gotten hurt emotionally. went home. it was my didi who stood by me. took care of me. our relationship gotten better. and also, think cause we were older and able to understand more. we sort of feel that my papa was kinda pitiful. being 'alone'. and also mama's putting good words for papa. we slowly accept that he's our father afterall. and though he's a lousy man and husband, he has done his best as a father, still providing us a shelter.
and now.. both my parents are still in touch with each other. more like friends now. me and didi stays with papa. relationship has gotten so well that we can talk to each other about everything.
anyway, the point is. many times parents, esp mothers, feel that they should give their children a complete family. but whats a complete family without love? children can sense. they will know their mother is not happy. and when chopper is involve. it will affect the child. my didi once told me, during that period la, he said, he hates daddy so much that he has the urge of taking the knife and stab him when he's sleeping then suicide. see?