What do you do when your hubby SHOUTS at you in PUBLIC???

[jal]

at least yours is still daring.my only has the guts to raise his voice at me in front of his own family members. For me i will try and control. if he steps on me too much, its bye bye

Wah!!! That is even MORE humiliating coz you are embarrased in front of people you know! Why can't men control their temper??? stupiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiid!!!

 

[pkshl]

my hubby quarrelled & yelled at me during my confinement bcos of my mum & other stuff. it happened at home & i tink my my confinement aunty & neighbours can hear cos he was shouting at me at the top of his voice. he even said things like past few mths i was pregnant so he tolerate & dun want to argue with me or my mum. bcos of this quarrel, i cried for a week & my eyesight was affected. now i know y ppl said cannot cry during confinement.

 

[jal]

Wow, Jal dear, if your hubby shouts at you in public, you better ask yourself wether it's his bad habbit or it's just a spontaneous anger.... But still he have no right to shouts at you in public:nah:

if me i'd choose no.2

but when he calm down after that then you need to clarify to him that he have to respect you too as an adult and as his wife!
It's not like you're a 5 year old and got scolded in public for doing something bad rite?

Even to a 5 year old parent's should not shout at them in public to coz it's making their self esteem down..coz it's making ppl around the kid looking and stare which is not a pleasant feeling.... (according to child psychology..hehe)

Why not let the internal house issue stays at home where you both can talk about it as an adult.

That's the problem with my husband. When he gets angry, he finds it very difficult to cool down unless he lets it all out. Even if he manages not to lose his temper at me in public, his face will be really black & people will look at us & wonder what happened...

 

[jal]

30yrs old consider old meh?? aiyo when you meet someone who loves you very much, you'll feel energetic with are/s again! HAHA!!!!

Yes I agree with Regina. 30 is NOT old. After all, you have been 21 years old too. There is no need to feel inferior to women who are in their 20s because one day, they will will become 30 & older. Seeing our age increases each year is a GOOD thing because it is evidence that we are living.

 

[jal]

my hubby quarrelled & yelled at me during my confinement bcos of my mum & other stuff. it happened at home & i tink my my confinement aunty & neighbours can hear cos he was shouting at me at the top of his voice. he even said things like past few mths i was pregnant so he tolerate & dont want to argue with me or my mum. bcos of this quarrel, i cried for a week & my eyesight was affected. now i know why ppl said cannot cry during confinement.

Oh! Sayang sayang~~~ Lemme slap your hubby online for you. *Piak piak*!

 

[shiseru]

my hubby quarrelled & yelled at me during my confinement bcos of my mum & other stuff. it happened at home & i tink my my confinement aunty & neighbours can hear cos he was shouting at me at the top of his voice. he even said things like past few mths i was pregnant so he tolerate & dont want to argue with me or my mum. bcos of this quarrel, i cried for a week & my eyesight was affected. now i know why ppl said cannot cry during confinement.

Oh hun, didnt your husband aware there is this thing called post natal depression? Please dont't be too upset, I dont't think he did it on purpose, and when one is angry, words and action can be really harsh, even though one dont't really mean to hurt the other party. I hope you guys are okay now. *hugz*

True, during confinment cannot cry. My eyesight is badly affected coz I have been crying after i lost my baby last month. My chest also a bit painful think i cried too hard and i cried too much, though I am starting to calm down a little a few days ago.

 

[New Mama]

True, during confinment cannot cry. My eyesight is badly affected coz I have been crying after i lost my baby last month. My chest also a bit painful think i cried too hard and i cried too much, though I am starting to calm down a little a few days ago.

So sorry to learn of your loss **hugz**

 

[glenndanker]

I will choose number 3.

When this happens, my husband knows he is in deep trouble. Because in the end, he would not even have the mood to work for few days after getting the 'special treatment' from me.

But so far, most of the times is I am the one who is shouting at my husband- no matter where the location is.

In the end, my husband will give in and even apologize.

But I ignored him all the while till few days later then we will patch up.

The smartest way he do is to use our daughter to apologize to me.

Pretend he is someone you don't know and just act innocent. This way he made himself look more like a bigger fool. Make sure your daughter is not the boxing bag and be close to your daughter and let her know she is not the cause of the conflict.

 

[Ting]

my hubby always tell me, it's not that people changes after marriage... no one has a\changes at all, it's just that love is so blind that one only see another 'bad point' after marriage... haha!!!

yup agree!
tts y my past relationships, when i notice the bad points i tell them byebyebye!

 

[Ting]

I think can lahz. Like Ting said, a person should not change drastically after marriage.

My hubby and I know each other for 17 years in total. Dated for 5 years, married for 12 years and he never shouts at me in public nor at home, also partly due to his good temper. In fact, I find he is more loving than before. I think to be able to meet my husband and marry him is the greatest reward that God has given me.

yup, i agree~ temper this kinda thing, very hard to change drastically.
for me, i hv a quick n bad temper. but thru out the years i hv learnt to tame down abit n tolerance level higher.


good for u girl! glad u met a great hubby!

 

[Ting]

Pretend he is someone you dont't know and just act innocent. This way he made himself look more like a bigger fool. Make sure your daughter is not the boxing bag and be close to your daughter and let her know she is not the cause of the conflict.

haha yeah!
look at him innocently n say: why u scold me? your sickness fa zuo again???
need to see doctor???


rofl!~

 

[meiteoh]

I actually look down on people who cannot control their temper in public - be it spouse to each other or parent to child. I have seen a man slap his wife in public in front of his children and while it shocked me, everyone else seemed to not bother. Save your reprimands (to your children or partner) for the home and be aware that scolding or hitting someone, be it a child or partner, for the purpose of "getting the message" across doesn't work - especially when it comes to disciplining children. It embarrasses them and sends the wrong message across.

Yelling - sorry to say - is a form of abuse and should be dealt with immediately lest it turns physical overtime. Lack of control over one's emotions should never be an excuse. We are human beings, capable of intelligence, rationale and self-awareness. Only animals lack the ability to control themselves.

My hubby never yells at me in public or private because it serves no purpose in communicating what he needs to say to me. If he did, I would have left him a long time ago. I don't and won't tolerate such behaviour because if he can do it to me, what is there to stop him from doing it to our children?

 

[jal]

I actually look down on people who cannot control their temper in public - be it spouse to each other or parent to child. I have seen a man slap his wife in public in front of his children and while it shocked me, everyone else seemed to not bother. Save your reprimands (to your children or partner) for the home and be aware that scolding or hitting someone, be it a child or partner, for the purpose of "getting the message" across doesn't work - especially when it comes to disciplining children. It embarrasses them and sends the wrong message across.

Yelling - sorry to say - is a form of abuse and should be dealt with immediately lest it turns physical overtime. Lack of control over one's emotions should never be an excuse. We are human beings, capable of intelligence, rationale and self-awareness. Only animals lack the ability to control themselves.

My hubby never yells at me in public or private because it serves no purpose in communicating what he needs to say to me. If he did, I would have left him a long time ago. I dont't and won't tolerate such behaviour because if he can do it to me, what is there to stop him from doing it to our children?

Meiteoh!!! I can't agree more with you!!! I will tell my hubby this. When we were dating, I already knew his temper but still, I chose to think too optimistically... Sighs...

 

[SunShine07]

Meiteoh!!! I can't agree more with you!!! I will tell my hubby this. When we were dating, I already knew his temper but still, I chose to think too optimistically... Sighs...

jal, sometime love is so blind like regina said that we just can tolerate their shortcomings... Think you an me also think alike....hope for him to change better....but in the end, i change from a cat to a tiger to him:tlaugh:

can't tolerate and left him....

 

[jal]

jal, sometime love is so blind like regina said that we just can tolerate their shortcomings... Think you an me also think alike....hope for him to change better....but in the end, i change from a cat to a tiger to him:tlaugh:

can't tolerate and left him....

I hope I dun have to travel this path... I think my temper compared to most gals is much better (not boasting), so I hope my hubby will appreciate this...

 

[SunShine07]

I hope I dont have to travel this path... I think my temper compared to most gals is much better (not boasting), so I hope my hubby will appreciate this...

i have very good temper also leh...:tlaugh:

Hopefully thing will change for you

 

[shiseru]

I actually look down on people who cannot control their temper in public - be it spouse to each other or parent to child?

* sheepish look :wong8:

Ah geez, I change alot liaoz lahz T__T
To be honest, I find i can better control my temper as I grow older.

 

[jal]

* sheepish look :wong8:

geez, I change alot liaoz lahz T__T
To be honest, I find i can better control my temper as I grow older.

Me too! Because as one grows older, one develops more wisdom. And is not so impervious to the idea that life is indeed fragile. You can go anytime, anywhere. It does not mean one goes only after one has a head full of white hairs.
Just to share a little, I had an ex-colleague who passed away tragically in a car accident 2 years ago. She was single & was the sole breadwinner of her house which consisted of her housewife mother & 2 school-going brothers. So you can imagine her mother's grief when she heard the news... After that shocking incident, I began to develop a more tolerant mind. Na de qi, fang de xia. Yao kang kai.

 

[shiseru]

jal, sometime love is so blind like regina said that we just can tolerate their shortcomings... Think you an me also think alike....hope for him to change better....but in the end, i change from a cat to a tiger to him:tlaugh:

can't tolerate and left him....

哈哈哈 老虎不发威，当我是病猫!

Sometimes one tends to push his luck and take advantage just becoz you are mild tempered and tolerate their actions. And when all hell starts to break loose, you find yourself saying "BEAT IT!"

 

[SunShine07]

哈哈哈 老虎不发威，当我是病猫!

Sometimes one tends to push his luck and take advantage just becoz you are mild tempered and tolerate their actions. And when all hell starts to break loose, you find yourself saying "BEAT IT!"

ya, and i tot he knows that he is wrong, but instead, keep saying that becos i have another man liao, that's why left him! he is really damn @#$$##$#@

we are not divorce yet, still hope that he will change and also for my son's sake....but i think it is quite diificult lah...

Maybe we drag till we are really apart, then maybe he got another woman who can really take all his nonsense then we divorce or what.....

but like i alwasy said, i am really happy with my life now~~~ancing_wub: