stressed looking after newborn-help

[huiyin87]

hi mummies, i feel so tired and stressed looking after my newborn..
first week was ok.. but now in my 2nd week, i start to feel negative..
my baby dont always cry, but he is sometime awake even after drinking milk, i have changed nappy for him le, no matter how i cuddle, he still open eyes big big look at me, dont want to slp.. then when i put him down, he starts to cry.. i hardly have rest.. esp at night times, i really so tired..
when will it be easier to take care of him?
mummies, can share your experience with me? thanks!

 

[Phoebii Cheng]

Anybody helping u take care of him? like confinement lady, mother or mother in law? or even hubby?

Actually for newborns u need plenty of rest, when ur bb sleep u oso need to sleep too, cos' NB usually wake up every 2-3 hrs for feed.....did u rest during daytime when ur son is sleeping?

r u oso currently BF ur bb?

If u hv someone helping u and if u need rest at night, u might want to express ur BM and let ur helper to feed the bb at night for u, then not so tiring......

Or u can play with ur bb during daytime, dun let him hv too much sleep so tht at night he can sleep longer.....I nv tried this method lah....I just let my son sleep as and when he likes.....but normally he oso sleep at night, but some others say tht if bb sleep enough during daytime, then at night they will oso sleep, so I dun really know....

Last but not least, if u dun hv any helper helping u, try to get one oke? so tht it is not so tiring for u

Take care!

 

[Domique]

Its like this in the beginning. U will get used to it. U sure become walking zombie one! Learn how to sleep when bb sleep.
U may wanna introduce yao lan, up to individual. So he can sleep well in the day. At nite i let my bb sleep in cot.

hi mummies, i feel so tired and stressed looking after my newborn..
first week was ok.. but now in my 2nd week, i start to feel negative..
my baby dont always cry, but he is sometime awake even after drinking milk, i have changed nappy for him , no matter how i cuddle, he still open eyes big big look at me, dont want to sleep.. then when i put him down, he starts to cry.. i hardly have rest.. esp at night times, i really so tired..
when will it be easier to take care of him?
mummies, can share your experience with me? thanks!

 

[huiyin87]

Anybody helping you take care of him? like confinement lady, mother or mother in law? or even hubby?

Actually for newborns you need plenty of rest, when your baby sleep you also need to sleep too, cos' NB usually wake up every 2-3 hours for feed.....did you rest during daytime when your son is sleeping?

are you also currently BF your baby?

If you have someone helping you and if you need rest at night, you might want to express your breast milk and let your helper to feed the baby at night for you, then not so tiring......

Or you can play with your baby during daytime, dont let him have too much sleep so tht at night he can sleep longer.....I never tried this method ....I just let my son sleep as and when he likes.....but normally he also sleep at night, but some others say tht if baby sleep enough during daytime, then at night they will also sleep, so I dont really know....

Last but not least, if you dont have any helper helping you, try to get one oke? so tht it is not so tiring for you

Take care!

hi mummy phoebii, i am taking care of him alone.. my mum cooks for me and then goes out.. hubby is wkn..
actually i wan to slp when baby slp, but once i slp, my baby wakes up.. need to craddle and then slp again.. i feel so frustrated as i was just about to fall into lala land, then gt awake again.. so i gave up slp.. unless someone offers to take care of him for few hrs.. (which is my sis but she usually not at home de lo)
i am expressing milk for baby, but lose confidence in it le.. so one day only pump once.. reason is baby dun like BM, and aso hungry easily after drinking BM.. so i need to feed more often..
i am looking after baby at night.. hubby has to wake up early for work so i dun wan ask him help me..
if i have 2nd child, sure engage confinement lady to help me lo!
but how long more will this tiredness goes off?
as in easier to handle baby? such as slp longer..

 

[huiyin87]

Its like this in the beginning. you will get used to it. you sure become walking zombie one! Learn how to sleep when baby sleep.
you may wanna introduce yao lan, up to individual. So he can sleep well in the day. At nite i let my baby sleep in cot.

hi domique, if day slp yao lan, night time he will slp cot anot?
or he will cry for yao lan at night aso?
i juz brought yao lan yesterday, baby dun seem to enjoy himself lehz..

 

[annie]

its a phase n it will pass soon. i am taking care of my girl alone too as im living overseas thus no frens, no family except my hubby n he needs to work.. so imagine no one cook for me too! i got to bring my girl out to tabao or i will need to cook myself! worse than u...lol

my girl 1st 3 weeks very guai. eat n sleep throughout the day. want her to wake up also cannot. i tried keeping her awake but cannot cos she will fall asleep... so she is basically sleeping round the clock but then will be up every 2.5hrs to drink milk day n night so i did rest well in those 3 weeks since she whole day sleep...but then after 3 weeks she goes crazy lol. daytime dun sleep then keep crying n crying dunno y. night time also cry n scream at the top of her voice. she always gets shock i dunno y. then scream n scream.. everyday i take 2-3hrs making her sleep at night! she will jsut scream n shout dun wan to sleep..even sleep also get shock n cry then wake up.. i tried not to let her nap on tummy but then end up no choice cos either she dun nap or she gets shock up very soon so i let her nap on tummy finally n she naps well.. but then she also wake up every 2-3hrs at night la.. just that daytime she dun sleep n hard to get her to sleep at night...

your son's sleeping pattern will be better as time goes by. i also cant nap when my girl nap cos after 3 weeks old, she only nap 30mins per time! how can i nap! lol. the 30mins, i need to take my shower.. go toilet.. eat my food etc etc. time not enough! as she gets older, she naps longer n also can entertain herself more thus i got more time to myself..

its a phase.. it will pass. hang on! oh! forgot to tell u... during a growth sprut, it will be worse. bb whole day seems hungry n cranky n i was feeding her almost round the clock n she wakes up every hr at night for 5 days! that time i kept going to forums n vent my frustration cos i was really sleep deprive...

 

[chiro]

hi mummies, i feel so tired and stressed looking after my newborn..
first week was ok.. but now in my 2nd week, i start to feel negative..
my baby dont always cry, but he is sometime awake even after drinking milk, i have changed nappy for him , no matter how i cuddle, he still open eyes big big look at me, dont want to sleep.. then when i put him down, he starts to cry.. i hardly have rest.. esp at night times, i really so tired..
when will it be easier to take care of him?
mummies, can share your experience with me? thanks!

i fed my son until he full, then he fall asleep. There was 1 time we peeped at each other till we both fell asleep haha. I put him on bed facin me, noticed he would steal a glance at me, and will close his eyes when he saw my eyes closed. So i peeped at him he peeped at me lor
Hhaha

recently we discovered that when we put him on bed.. He will cry...actually he wants to be carried to sleep..

 

[candy_ian]

my baby boy is 11wks now. felt tired just like u initially as i'm total breastfeeding n din get any confinement lady din wanna trouble my mum to travel to n fro too so managed it without them but had a maid to do the housework n engage confinement tingkat. Initially was stressful with little sleep n feeding him all the time n had to struggle with bathing him when he was so tiny. Even now he sleeps at nite waking up onli for milk but almost every 3 hrs have to latch him on so dun get to sleep much at nite day time cannot even

 

[*cynn.89llaluby]

yao-lan + cot... im doing this since D-D born... they will sleep. because new-born love to sleep...

whatever method u intro to them ... will soon become their long-term habit... so... decide whether uu want introduce yao-lan / pat-buttock / pacifier...

DONT PUMP ONLY ONCE~!.. your milk quantity will drop.. latch more.. pump more. even pump nothing also must pump stimulate...

your baby hungry? breastmilk is liddat....

make your breastmilk more quality... eat more omega... drink more milk(those milk powder for breast feeding mummy)

its a phase.. it will pass. hang on! oh! forgot to tell you... during a growth sprut, it will be worse. baby whole day seems hungry and cranky and i was feeding her almost round the clock and she wakes up every hr at night for 5 days! that time i kept going to forums and vent my frustration cos i was really sleep deprive...

u refering to month 5 liddat right?
izzit izzit heeeeex

 

[Cream]

If you want to engage a CL, you still can do it now. The good thing is the CL can guide you on how to handle the bb also. And you will surely pick up a lot of knowledge from there. And when you finish your confinement period, the CL will still be around. So you can also take over and see how you cope with the CL as backup. Now, what you really need is GOOD rest... if not, you will suffer physically and mentally.

Have you tried introducing the pacifier? I use to be against pacifiers, but now I worship pacifiers. I think its the best thing ever invented. If you dun mind, try it. I let my gal suck on it when she is tired but cannot fall asleep on her own. She will be in dreamland after a while. Then I will remove it, and she will sleep until the next feeding time (sometimes even sleep past her feeding time).

 

[jojoki]

its a phase and it will pass soon. i am taking care of my girl alone too as im living overseas thus no friends, no family except my hubby and he needs to work.. so imagine no one cook for me too! i got to bring my girl out to tabao or i will need to cook myself! worse than you...lol

my girl 1st 3 weeks very guai. eat and sleep throughout the day. want her to wake up also cannot. i tried keeping her awake but cannot cos she will fall asleep... so she is basically sleeping round the clock but then will be up every 2.5hrs to drink milk day and night so i did rest well in those 3 weeks since she whole day sleep...but then after 3 weeks she goes crazy lol. daytime dont sleep then keep crying and crying dont know why. night time also cry and scream at the top of her voice. she always gets shock i dont know why. then scream and scream.. everyday i take 2-3hrs making her sleep at night! she will jsut scream and shout dont want to sleep..even sleep also get shock and cry then wake up.. i tried not to let her nap on tummy but then end up no choice cos either she dont nap or she gets shock up very soon so i let her nap on tummy finally and she naps well.. but then she also wake up every 2-3hrs at night .. just that daytime she dont sleep and hard to get her to sleep at night...

your son's sleeping pattern will be better as time goes by. i also cant nap when my girl nap cos after 3 weeks old, she only nap 30mins per time! how can i nap! lol. the 30mins, i need to take my shower.. go toilet.. eat my food etc etc. time not enough! as she gets older, she naps longer and also can entertain herself more thus i got more time to myself..

its a phase.. it will pass. hang on! oh! forgot to tell you... during a growth sprut, it will be worse. baby whole day seems hungry and cranky and i was feeding her almost round the clock and she wakes up every hr at night for 5 days! that time i kept going to forums and vent my frustration cos i was really sleep deprive...

when is the growth spurt? my bb kept waking yesterday night. like every 1.5 hour to feed.. sigh!! so tired man today...

 

[cherry]

I think it is easier to direct BF than bottle feed. It is because we dont't need to wash milk bottles, sterilize them etc. Especially in the middle of the night, we dont't need to wake up to measure and mix the milk powder. Just latch the baby on, that's all. New mother may feel very tired in the first month because of the frequency of feeding and lack of sleep. And BF is a kind of "work" which couldn't be delegated to others. But when the baby's sleeping routine is set up, the baby is not that hard to handle. (of course, at that time, there may be some new problems :err

 

[yan2]

hi mummies, i feel so tired and stressed looking after my newborn..
first week was ok.. but now in my 2nd week, i start to feel negative..
my baby dont always cry, but he is sometime awake even after drinking milk, i have changed nappy for him , no matter how i cuddle, he still open eyes big big look at me, dont want to sleep.. then when i put him down, he starts to cry.. i hardly have rest.. esp at night times, i really so tired..
when will it be easier to take care of him?
mummies, can share your experience with me? thanks!

After CL left, i took care of my dear daughter all by myself. Felt so tired and stressed like you. In the morning before my dear daughter woke up and before husband went to work, i had my shower, pump milk and breakfast. When my dear daughter slept i also slept..sometimes put her on my chest and we slept together...for lunch, i had simple food like bread, biscuits and instant noddles..for dinner, we ordered catered food...i was scared esp when night comes, my dear daughter would cry and cry before her sleep around 8+pm, i would cuddle her till my handaches. She cried, i also cried. I told myself i dont want to have 2nd child, didn't want to go through again.

dont worry, stay strong. You will pull through this tough times (first few months) . As she grew older, its easy to take care.

 

[Queenbabe]

Dont stress ..... anyone helping you since u r still doing confinement ???? At first i also very stress as after 9years from my eldest daughter but for the sake of baby(2nd son) i told myself to be strong ........ You can do it ok .......... All mummies here went through all these .... Anything come here we will be here for you ...

 

[annie]

growth sprut happenry often.. as far as i remember, its the 10th day of birth, 3mth, 6mths, 9mths, 1yr n so on..

 

[jasobias]

hi mummy phoebii, i am taking care of him alone.. my mum cooks for me and then goes out.. hubby is wkn..
actually i want to sleep when baby sleep, but once i sleep, my baby wakes up.. need to craddle and then sleep again.. i feel so frustrated as i was just about to fall into lala land, then gt awake again.. so i gave up sleep.. unless someone offers to take care of him for few hours.. (which is my sis but she usually not at home )
i am expressing milk for baby, but lose confidence in it .. so one day only pump once.. reason is baby dont like breast milk, and aso hungry easily after drinking breast milk.. so i need to feed more often..
i am looking after baby at night.. hubby has to wake up early for work so i dont want ask him help me..
if i have 2nd child, sure engage confinement lady to help me !
but how long more will this tiredness goes off?
as in easier to handle baby? such as sleep longer..

hi ,
sorry u r having such a hard time.But lack of sleep can drive anyone mad.U have to engage ur hubbys help.Its his child too.When he comes back fr work,hand him over the baby to watch for a few hrs while u take a nap.And when ur hubby wants to go to bed already he can wake u up then.At least u wld have some sleep.N sometimes its not a bad idea to let the baby cry it out esp after u have just fed it n changed it n u know he is fine but just being fussy.I made the mistake of over cuddling my first baby which almost drove me insane.for my 2nd baby i was wiser, just let him fuss if he is fussy.I dont run to pick him up when he whimpers.N he was the easiest baby then to look after.When it was time for nap.I fed him n put him in the crib n he wld look ard for a while n in the end just fall asleep on his own when he realises tht there is nothing tht exciting tht is gonna be happening anytime soon.:tlaugh:

 

[huiyin87]

hi mummies, thanks for your advise!
realised every mum goes through this stage..i am not alone..
but i really didnt expect it to be so tough and tiring..
even more tough than pregnancy or giving birth! haha
do u mummies keep a lookout for your newborn 24 hrs?
or once they are asleep, you leave them alone?

 

[stonston]

looking after newborns is not an easy job!

how i managed to get some rest:
- feed baby more during the day so tt at night he wont get hungry so easily
- learn to fall asleep IMMEDIATELY, which means once baby is settled, i close my eyes n i'm in dreamland already
- set routine for my boy. bed time = wipe body, put powder, change clothes, off lights and nothing exciting. very soon he'll learn to sleep. even during day time i'll close the curtains so it's dimmer and he'll noe it's time to sleep.
- dun carry him all the time. sometimes i bring him to living room (lie on a mattress on the floor) while i watch tv. sometimes he wants ppl to carry, i jus hold him, but i'm seated down, watching tv.

 

[annie]

what do you mean by look out for them 24hrs a day even after they sleep?

yah learning how to sleep immdiately when baby is sleeping is impt. i dont nap with her but then once she goes to bed at night i usually finish up my things and join her as soon as i can and once i touch the bed im off to dreamland lol. so in another words, i sleep almost as much as my girl! lol.

night routine will help your baby settle easier at night.. for my case its very simple and everyday same time. 8.30pm milk then cuddle and watch tv together. 9pm bath. then after bath i give her milk again (feed her more so she can last longer at night. not sure really useful or not cos sometimes she can sleep very long but sometimes not lol). by 9.30pm she is off to dreamland. she goes down easily without any struggle now since she has this routine since day 1..

 

[snowbear]

hi mummies, i feel so tired and stressed looking after my newborn..
first week was ok.. but now in my 2nd week, i start to feel negative..
my baby dont always cry, but he is sometime awake even after drinking milk, i have changed nappy for him , no matter how i cuddle, he still open eyes big big look at me, dont want to sleep.. then when i put him down, he starts to cry.. i hardly have rest.. esp at night times, i really so tired..
when will it be easier to take care of him?
mummies, can share your experience with me? thanks!

i can understand how u feel coz i was also handling bb on my own (same as u, my hubby working and has to wake up early so i handle all late nite bb stuff on my own, as far as possible). My mil only cooked for me and didn't know how to handle bb so i did everything myself.

I had a lot of bfding problems in the first month and had a lot of pain from blocked ducts, sore, cracked and blistered nipples. I had to tahan all that pain and some more not enuff sleep (hardly a 2hr stretch). I had to pump, feed, put bb to zz, wash and sterilise the pump and bottle... and by the time all that was done, it would be almost time for the next pumping session... BUT things got better when bb finally learnt to latch properly in the 2nd month and i'm sure things will get better for u too!