EDD Jan 2012 Mummies

[Excited Mummy]

Hmm... I wonder if I've too high expectations of my in-laws. I know relationship with in-laws is a touchy issue.
I had always tried to be nice to them but I just feel they are not reciprocal enough.

During festive times, I would definitely buy festive goods for my in-laws. CNY - abalone, bak kwa, golden swallows' bird nest etc, mid-autumn festival - raffles hotel mooncakes... treated them to 5-star hotel dinner too. when my hubby and i went for our honeymoon, i bought branded wallet and handbags for my in-laws, including sister-in-laws. just feel that they aren't appreciative. they probably think my hubby pays for them!
it's ok for them not to give me things but i think it's only considerate and kind for them to at least ask how i am doing during my pregnancy!

I dont have a good relationship with my in-laws cos' I had arguments with them during wedding preparations. They had insisted on their way for some things which were not what I wanted for my wedding and I had to protest. And more than 1 year later, they still owed me $$ for a few wedding tables which they were supposed to be given to me as dowry! My hubby offered to pay me but I said no coz' those were supposed to be from them to my parents. My mother-in-law used to insinuate that I was fat many, many, many times, even though I am not overweight! She insulted me on several occasions. She is not highly educated & I take it as she is jealous that I'm taking away her only son. She herself is not slim! My hubby is on the thinner side. During my wedding dinner, she thought my hair was a wig!!! I have lustrous natural hair. Not fake hair please. She always wants to make me angry by making stupid remarks!

Now that I am expecting a baby boy, the first grandson of the family, they don't even show much care & concern for me and our baby!
It was only until my hubby asked them to prepare some bird's nest for me that they did so ONCE throughout my pregnancy thus far, which was last week. SIGH! When I visit them with my hubby, they don't even ask me how I am with my pregnancy or ask me if I need them to cook anything for me to eat. I'm already 6mth + pregnant but they dont even ask if I would need help with my confinement or whatsover.

It's my own mum who will prepare nutritious meals for me when I visit my parents' place. So my mum will help me with my confinement.
My in-laws treat their own daughters well but not me well. My mother-in-law helped my sister-in-law with her confinement. I do complain to my husband that they are very biased.

Even when we had our house-warming, my parents-in-law did not even bother to come although we invited them - one went overseas, the other had something on. My sisters-in-law came, empty-handed. As usual. They didn't even bother to give an ang pow to us when we got married. Unlike my parents who gave us an ang pow for good fortune and our friends who gave us simple house-warming gifts, from ang pows to photo frame to fair price/cold storage/robinson's vouchers to bless us and our love nest.

I invited them to my place and cooked dinner for them last year when we moved to our love nest. Till now, I had not even done so for my own family.
I tried to be a good daughter-in-law to them but I just feel that since they are not reciprocal, then I should not try so hard to please!

My hubby says we should ask them to help look after our baby when I finish my maternity leave and need to go back to work. But I really think they are not going to treat our baby well. They fuss over my sister-in-law's girl a lot and shower her with too much attention and too little discipline. I also don't like the fact that my mother-in-law would stick food into her mouth before she give to the kid. Very unhygienic!!!

 

[Happy MTB]

Hmm... I wonder if I've too high expectations of my in-laws. I know relationship with in-laws is a touchy issue.
I had always tried to be nice to them but I just feel they are not reciprocal enough.

During festive times, I would definitely buy festive goods for my in-laws. CNY - abalone, bak kwa, golden swallows' bird nest etc, mid-autumn festival - raffles hotel mooncakes... treated them to 5-star hotel dinner too. when my hubby and i went for our honeymoon, i bought branded wallet and handbags for my in-laws, including sister-in-laws. just feel that they aren't appreciative. they probably think my hubby pays for them!
it's ok for them not to give me things but i think it's only considerate and kind for them to at least ask how i am doing during my pregnancy!

I dont have a good relationship with my in-laws cos' I had arguments with them during wedding preparations. They had insisted on their way for some things which were not what I wanted for my wedding and I had to protest. And more than 1 year later, they still owed me $$ for a few wedding tables which they were supposed to be given to me as dowry! My hubby offered to pay me but I said no coz' those were supposed to be from them to my parents. My mother-in-law used to insinuate that I was fat many, many, many times, even though I am not overweight! She insulted me on several occasions. She is not highly educated & I take it as she is jealous that I'm taking away her only son. She herself is not slim! My hubby is on the thinner side. During my wedding dinner, she thought my hair was a wig!!! I have lustrous natural hair. Not fake hair please. She always wants to make me angry by making stupid remarks!

Now that I am expecting a baby boy, the first grandson of the family, they don't even show much care & concern for me and our baby!
It was only until my hubby asked them to prepare some bird's nest for me that they did so ONCE throughout my pregnancy thus far, which was last week. SIGH! When I visit them with my hubby, they don't even ask me how I am with my pregnancy or ask me if I need them to cook anything for me to eat. I'm already 6mth + pregnant but they dont even ask if I would need help with my confinement or whatsover.

It's my own mum who will prepare nutritious meals for me when I visit my parents' place. So my mum will help me with my confinement.
My in-laws treat their own daughters well but not me well. My mother-in-law helped my sister-in-law with her confinement. I do complain to my husband that they are very biased.

Even when we had our house-warming, my parents-in-law did not even bother to come although we invited them - one went overseas, the other had something on. My sisters-in-law came, empty-handed. As usual. They didn't even bother to give an ang pow to us when we got married. Unlike my parents who gave us an ang pow for good fortune and our friends who gave us simple house-warming gifts, from ang pows to photo frame to fair price/cold storage/robinson's vouchers to bless us and our love nest.

I invited them to my place and cooked dinner for them last year when we moved to our love nest. Till now, I had not even done so for my own family.
I tried to be a good daughter-in-law to them but I just feel that since they are not reciprocal, then I should not try so hard to please!

My hubby says we should ask them to help look after our baby when I finish my maternity leave and need to go back to work. But I really think they are not going to treat our baby well. They fuss over my sister-in-law's girl a lot and shower her with too much attention and too little discipline. I also don't like the fact that my mother-in-law would stick food into her mouth before she give to the kid. Very unhygienic!!!

Hi Excited Mummy,

HMm..I know how you feel. Theres always some conflicts between in laws. I have heard alot from my friends & own sister too..For me, my mother in law also never prepare any bird nest for me till now, not even once. So me & my hubby buy ourselves lor...-_-. & she teach my hubby how to cook bird nest..even my mother also never do anything for me till now, she never come visit me cos she need to take care of my nephew 24hrs! I am also sad even more sadder that my own mother never even take care of me or show any concern while am preg.. But, i never blame my mother, i just feel that she is 70 yrs old already, she still need to take care of my nephew, she must be very tired. & she knew that my hubby & in laws will take care of me, i will be fine. What i feel is, no matter how our in laws treat us, so long our hubby side us & understand our situation, treat us well, that will be enough. Hubby are with us forever not the in laws. There will be never ending stories for in laws disputes, so why make yourself so angry & sad? No matter how, it is still us, parent who need to bring up the child & educate them well. I believe one day your mother in law will be impressed with you when she see how well u have brought up your child. For your bb sake, be happy If you need to talk, you can PM me ya HUGS.

 

[Excited Mummy]

Hi HappyMTB,
Thank you for sharing your situation and consoling me.
You are also not having it easy but taking things in your stride. At least I've my mum to turn to for help and support.
My parents are much younger than my in-laws. Parents are in their late 50s while in-laws are already in their early 70s & late 60s.
I suppose I should not have any expectation of my in-laws so that I would not be disappointed...
whatever they do or don't do will then not be have too much of an impact on me.

My hubby and I intentionally bought our place near to his parents so that he, as the only son, would still be able to visit them daily and care for them.
My hubby also wants them to help look after our children, with the help of our future maid.

I will prefer my own parents to look after as (1) my mum also thinks that sticking food into adults' mouths before giving to young kids is gross and unhygienic, (2) my parents are stricter with discipline and will not allow kids to misbehave, and think "Jia Jiao" (Home Teaching) is very important.
My in-laws tend to spoil their 5-year old grand-daughter so much so that she is like a tyrant at home but she will behave when she is in school.
The walls, doors and tables at home are vandalised with her drawings, stickers are stuck onto the furniture, walls and doors, toys are strewn all over the floor (the maid has to clear up after her mess. when she was younger, she would accuse other people of making the mess, including my hubby and me?!), even used to pee onto the floor of bedrooms of people whom she thinks are not nice to her or scolds her!!! I think she is a little monster!

I really do not want my baby son to have such a bad influence in future.

 

[AhJanz]

I have the same situation too... used to feel rejected from MIL. Things liKe CNY goodies that I bot for her always returned back. But I wont deny that r/ship gets better after my marriage. My PIL dont ask about my pregnancy too and we didnt share much with them. But I have very good parent who take care of me all this while, Im a pampered child, hehe..

I agree with Happy MTB, as long as hb side us, tats all it matters.

Excited Mummy, I have alot of situation with in law that are quite similar as yours. Like inviting my FIL over for dinner but he rejected. Treat their daughters like princess. And wedding issues, etc...

 

[Happy MTB]

Hi HappyMTB,
Thank you for sharing your situation and consoling me.
You are also not having it easy but taking things in your stride. At least I've my mum to turn to for help and support.
My parents are much younger than my in-laws. Parents are in their late 50s while in-laws are already in their early 70s & late 60s.
I suppose I should not have any expectation of my in-laws so that I would not be disappointed...
whatever they do or don't do will then not be have too much of an impact on me.

My hubby and I intentionally bought our place near to his parents so that he, as the only son, would still be able to visit them daily and care for them.
My hubby also wants them to help look after our children, with the help of our future maid.

I will prefer my own parents to look after as (1) my mum also thinks that sticking food into adults' mouths before giving to young kids is gross and unhygienic, (2) my parents are stricter with discipline and will not allow kids to misbehave, and think "Jia Jiao" (Home Teaching) is very important.
My in-laws tend to spoil their 5-year old grand-daughter so much so that she is like a tyrant at home but she will behave when she is in school.
The walls, doors and tables at home are vandalised with her drawings, stickers are stuck onto the furniture, walls and doors, toys are strewn all over the floor (the maid has to clear up after her mess. when she was younger, she would accuse other people of making the mess, including my hubby and me?!), even used to pee onto the floor of bedrooms of people whom she thinks are not nice to her or scolds her!!! I think she is a little monster!

I really do not want my baby son to have such a bad influence in future.

Hi Excited mummy,

Yes. I have seen alot of these kids! My friends' nephew & niece also like that. Even my own nephew! I have seen many become selfish, & no "JIA JIAO". Having who to take care of our child is a headache, for me, i have no choice, i have to find a nanny when am back to work, as my in law are still working & my mum is too old to take care & also taking care of my nephew. & i do not even know if the nanny is is good. There are many many many changes in our life when baby comes, like you said just take things in our stride. There are many "no choice" in life. or if u can afford, try finding nanny? if you are uncomfortable with your in laws to take care of ur baby? There are many options, just see which one you think you are comfortable with & feel at ease.

 

[cygo]

Hmm... I wonder if I've too high expectations of my in-laws. I know relationship with in-laws is a touchy issue.
I had always tried to be nice to them but I just feel they are not reciprocal enough.

During festive times, I would definitely buy festive goods for my in-laws. CNY - abalone, bak kwa, golden swallows' bird nest etc, mid-autumn festival - raffles hotel mooncakes... treated them to 5-star hotel dinner too. when my hubby and i went for our honeymoon, i bought branded wallet and handbags for my in-laws, including sister-in-laws. just feel that they aren't appreciative. they probably think my hubby pays for them!
it's ok for them not to give me things but i think it's only considerate and kind for them to at least ask how i am doing during my pregnancy!

I dont have a good relationship with my in-laws cos' I had arguments with them during wedding preparations. They had insisted on their way for some things which were not what I wanted for my wedding and I had to protest. And more than 1 year later, they still owed me $$ for a few wedding tables which they were supposed to be given to me as dowry! My hubby offered to pay me but I said no coz' those were supposed to be from them to my parents. My mother-in-law used to insinuate that I was fat many, many, many times, even though I am not overweight! She insulted me on several occasions. She is not highly educated & I take it as she is jealous that I'm taking away her only son. She herself is not slim! My hubby is on the thinner side. During my wedding dinner, she thought my hair was a wig!!! I have lustrous natural hair. Not fake hair please. She always wants to make me angry by making stupid remarks!

Now that I am expecting a baby boy, the first grandson of the family, they dont't even show much care & concern for me and our baby!
It was only until my hubby asked them to prepare some bird's nest for me that they did so ONCE throughout my pregnancy thus far, which was last week. SIGH! When I visit them with my hubby, they dont't even ask me how I am with my pregnancy or ask me if I need them to cook anything for me to eat. I'm already 6mth + pregnant but they dont even ask if I would need help with my confinement or whatsover.

It's my own mum who will prepare nutritious meals for me when I visit my parents' place. So my mum will help me with my confinement.
My in-laws treat their own daughters well but not me well. My mother-in-law helped my sister-in-law with her confinement. I do complain to my husband that they are very biased.

Even when we had our house-warming, my parents-in-law did not even bother to come although we invited them - one went overseas, the other had something on. My sisters-in-law came, empty-handed. As usual. They didn't even bother to give an ang pow to us when we got married. Unlike my parents who gave us an ang pow for good fortune and our friends who gave us simple house-warming gifts, from ang pows to photo frame to fair price/cold storage/robinson's vouchers to bless us and our love nest.

I invited them to my place and cooked dinner for them last year when we moved to our love nest. Till now, I had not even done so for my own family.
I tried to be a good daughter-in-law to them but I just feel that since they are not reciprocal, then I should not try so hard to please!

My hubby says we should ask them to help look after our baby when I finish my maternity leave and need to go back to work. But I really think they are not going to treat our baby well. They fuss over my sister-in-law's girl a lot and shower her with too much attention and too little discipline. I also dont't like the fact that my mother-in-law would stick food into her mouth before she give to the kid. Very unhygienic!!!

Excited Mummy,
i couldn't agree more with Happy MTB. be happy for your son. :wong29:
hav you ever consider enrolling your son in the nearest infant care you can find?
& can avoid conflicts with your mother in law for the diff pt of view also.
that is my case, my mom is looking after my bro's kids now, even though she need not bring them nor fetch them fr sch no more, she stil pretends to be bz with them. she used to looked after my sis's 3 sons. my babies r the only grand children she never offer to help look after.:wong10:
But we are proud that we take care of our gal ourselves ever since my confinement.
happy that she's closer to us also. :wong19:
I m already glad that my mom offered to help during my confinement. but for my to-born, she already hinted, she will be bz, as my edd is near cny... so we still looking for help.
& remember, our ears r always here for you dear. :wong18:

 

[princessyuki]

Hi mummies,

Letting go of the following cheap cheap:

L1 - $3
View attachment 65071

L2 - $3
View attachment 65072

L3 - $3
View attachment 65073

L4 - $3
View attachment 65074

L5 - $4
View attachment 65075

L6 - $3
View attachment 65076

L7 - $4
View attachment 65077

L8 - $3
View attachment 65078

L9 - $7
View attachment 65079

Interested parties kindly PM me.
* Not for fussies *

 

[Happy MTB]

Excited Mummy,
i couldn't agree more with Happy MTB. be happy for your son. :wong29:
hav you ever consider enrolling your son in the nearest infant care you can find?
& can avoid conflicts with your mother in law for the diff pt of view also.
that is my case, my mom is looking after my bro's kids now, even though she need not bring them nor fetch them fr sch no more, she stil pretends to be bz with them. she used to looked after my sis's 3 sons. my babies r the only grand children she never offer to help look after.:wong10:
But we are proud that we take care of our gal ourselves ever since my confinement.
happy that she's closer to us also. :wong19:
I m already glad that my mom offered to help during my confinement. but for my to-born, she already hinted, she will be bz, as my edd is near cny... so we still looking for help.
& remember, our ears r always here for you dear. :wong18:

Ya..every families have its own problems. Even confinement, i still have no one to help me but to look for confinement lady. Both nanny & confinement lady all need $. So, some of you all are considered lucky We have many problems to settle already. Be proud & feel blissful that there is a life in us! Looking forward mummies! Dont care about in laws la..Hooray to us mummies!!! *Blinks*

 

[cygo]

Ya..every families have its own problems. Even confinement, i still have no one to help me but to look for confinement lady. Both nanny & confinement lady all need $. So, some of you all are considered lucky We have many problems to settle already. Be proud & feel blissful that there is a life in us! Looking forward mummies! Dont care about in laws ..Hooray to us mummies!!! *Blinks*

yes yes Happy MTB, *chiang* :wong18: *chiang* to our babies!

 

[fydapai]

Helo to all mummies & mummies-to-be! im going to be mummy soon too!! EDD is on 12th January 2012. **excited**

my very first post in mummysg although i hv been reading the thread since i found out that im pregnant.

Quick quesn to every1. Have u ladies done 3d/4d scan? coz im keen to do one soon:001_302:

 

[Happy MTB]

yes yes Happy MTB, *chiang* :wong18: *chiang* to our babies!

Hhaha so cute *chiang Chiang*!!

 

[Excited Mummy]

Thank you for the mutual support and sharing, Happy MTB & Cygo.
Indeed it's not easy and "jia jia you ben nan nian de jin" (every family has its own issues, challenges, and problems).
I believe both of you also need to come to terms with your own family issues. ((Hugs)) Redirect Notice

Yes, let us rejoice in the new life we have created which is growing inside us each day.
We should look at the positive side of things and remember that ultimately, as parents, we are the ones who bring our children to this world and we ought to be responsible to and for them. Of course, with dual income families as the norm, we often need some extra helping hands.

I'll get a domestic helper but not sure if I will get a nanny.

I have even thought of resigning from my job and be a stay-at-home mum for my baby, but that will mean a lot of sacrifices which at this moment, I am not willing to make yet. I still want my financial independence (who knows what will happen in future?
I mean it's scary to be a homemaker and one day, you may find your hubby is unable to support you for some reason, be it health / death / disappearance / betrayal / divorce...
I also want a professional identity which is not just linked to being a wife and mother.
I help to supplement my hubby's income and pay the housing, and definitely still give my parents monthly allowance to show my appreciation for bringing me up. In addition, my father had decided to retire earlier than the official age.
In other words, I am starting to know how it feels like to be sandwiched between having parents and future children to support.

 

[cygo]

Thank you for the mutual support and sharing, Happy MTB & Cygo.
Indeed it's not easy and "jia jia you ben nan nian jin" (every family has its own issues, challenges, and problems).
I believe both of you also need to come to terms with your own family issues. ((Hugs)) Redirect Notice

Yes, let us rejoice in the new life we have created which is growing inside us each day.
We should look at the positive side of things and remember that ultimately, as parents, we are the ones who bring our children to this world and we ought to be responsible to and for them. Of course, with dual income families as the norm, we often need some extra helping hands.

I'll get a domestic helper but not sure if I will get a nanny.

I have even thought of resigning from my job and be a stay-at-home mum for my baby, but that will mean a lot of sacrifices which at this moment, I am not willing to make yet. I still want my financial independence (who knows what will happen in future?
I mean it's scary to be a homemaker and one day, you may find your hubby is unable to support you for some reason, be it health / death / disappearance / betrayal / divorce...
I also want a professional identity which is not just linked to being a wife and mother.
I help to supplement my hubby's income and pay the housing, and definitely still give my parents monthly allowance to show my appreciation for bringing me up. In addition, my father had decided to retire earlier than the official age.
In other words, I am starting to know how it feels like to be sandwiched between having parents and future children to support.

No worries Happy Mummy,
I believe most of the mommies hav been tru this stage of life, & we survived!! & so wil you.
you wil forget all troubles when you see your baby smiles. :001_302:
(my dad had stopped working for the last decade...is in his 60s now)
but just look @ things this way, for all these we've been tru wil make us wanna be better parents. so it's not so bad after all. :wong3:
JIA YOU!! JIA YOU!! ancing_biggrin:

 

[Happy MTB]

Thank you for the mutual support and sharing, Happy MTB & Cygo.
Indeed it's not easy and "jia jia you ben nan nian de jin" (every family has its own issues, challenges, and problems).
I believe both of you also need to come to terms with your own family issues. ((Hugs)) Redirect Notice

Yes, let us rejoice in the new life we have created which is growing inside us each day.
We should look at the positive side of things and remember that ultimately, as parents, we are the ones who bring our children to this world and we ought to be responsible to and for them. Of course, with dual income families as the norm, we often need some extra helping hands.

I'll get a domestic helper but not sure if I will get a nanny.

I have even thought of resigning from my job and be a stay-at-home mum for my baby, but that will mean a lot of sacrifices which at this moment, I am not willing to make yet. I still want my financial independence (who knows what will happen in future?
I mean it's scary to be a homemaker and one day, you may find your hubby is unable to support you for some reason, be it health / death / disappearance / betrayal / divorce...
I also want a professional identity which is not just linked to being a wife and mother.
I help to supplement my hubby's income and pay the housing, and definitely still give my parents monthly allowance to show my appreciation for bringing me up. In addition, my father had decided to retire earlier than the official age.
In other words, I am starting to know how it feels like to be sandwiched between having parents and future children to support.

yes! i agree with cygo. To me, i still prefer to be financially independence. No matter how tough it is. I think woman still need to have their own identity. Jia you!!!!

 

[Excited Mummy]

yes! let's all jia you! Best wishes to all

 

[Hidz]

Hey mtbs...

Tmrw will be my 1st of the tri-weekly gynae appt.. Is there anything different that i should expect this time? Quite nervous.. And excited somehow.. The countdown is getting nearer to edd!! Hehe ;D

Oh btw do u babes ask loads of qns to your gynae? I'm always filleD with alot of qns in my ehad prior, but somehow my mind went blank almost each time i faced my gynae!! even tho i've written down some of the qns.. Ended up i wld always feel alil silly.. Is this normal?

What are the typical qns to ask ard this time? I'm just too excited to think! ;p

 

[cygo]

Hey mtbs...

Tmrw will be my 1st of the tri-weekly gynae appt.. Is there anything different that i should expect this time? Quite nervous.. And excited somehow.. The countdown is getting nearer to edd!! Hehe ;D

Oh btw do you babes ask loads of qns to your gynae? I'm always filleD with alot of qns in my ehad prior, but somehow my mind went blank almost each time i faced my gynae!! even tho i've written down some of the qns.. Ended up i wld always feel alil silly.. Is this normal?

What are the typical qns to ask around this time? I'm just too excited to think! ;p

Hi Hidz,
to me there is not much diff, just shorter meeting time w/ gynae, as may not need scan on some visits , more Q-ing in clinic & bills
dont know there r any typ qns or not, only know my head is stil as blank as when i had my gal when i see my gynae, esp after he says "the baby is growing well, he is healthy, size is normal, heart beat is good, umbilical cord is not around the neck."
then i happy. ancing_tongue: haha...

 

[Hidz]

Hi Hidz,
to me there is not much diff, just shorter meeting time w/ gynae, as may not need scan on some visits , more Q-ing in clinic & bills
dont know there r any typ qns or not, only know my head is stil as blank as when i had my gal when i see my gynae, esp after he says "the baby is growing well, he is healthy, size is normal, heart beat is good, umbilical cord is not around the neck."
then i happy. ancing_tongue: haha...

Hi cygo,

Lol... I guess it'll be kinda boring? Seems like i've been hearing the same dialogue from the gynae past few visits.. Till i start to wonder is that all the gynae gona say to me? ;p oh plus, " are your vitamins enough? "

That's all.. Like no connection le.. Quite predictable. I mean its good to hear everything's good and well.. Etc.. But as first time mums, i thought it would be .. Just nicer, you know? I guess its cos most gynaes are too used in the industry.. Nothing new to them

Anw kinda too late cos i've signed up the gynae package... Haizzz.. Kinda envy other mtbs when i hear them relate 'warmer' sessions with their gynae..


Oh and one more thing, do any of the mtbs here have specific birthplans to share with their gynae?

 

[Karcool]

Hmm... I wonder if I've too high expectations of my in-laws. I know relationship with in-laws is a touchy issue.
I had always tried to be nice to them but I just feel they are not reciprocal enough.

During festive times, I would definitely buy festive goods for my in-laws. CNY - abalone, bak kwa, golden swallows' bird nest etc, mid-autumn festival - raffles hotel mooncakes... treated them to 5-star hotel dinner too. when my hubby and i went for our honeymoon, i bought branded wallet and handbags for my in-laws, including sister-in-laws. just feel that they aren't appreciative. they probably think my hubby pays for them!
it's ok for them not to give me things but i think it's only considerate and kind for them to at least ask how i am doing during my pregnancy!

I dont have a good relationship with my in-laws cos' I had arguments with them during wedding preparations. They had insisted on their way for some things which were not what I wanted for my wedding and I had to protest. And more than 1 year later, they still owed me $$ for a few wedding tables which they were supposed to be given to me as dowry! My hubby offered to pay me but I said no coz' those were supposed to be from them to my parents. My mother-in-law used to insinuate that I was fat many, many, many times, even though I am not overweight! She insulted me on several occasions. She is not highly educated & I take it as she is jealous that I'm taking away her only son. She herself is not slim! My hubby is on the thinner side. During my wedding dinner, she thought my hair was a wig!!! I have lustrous natural hair. Not fake hair please. She always wants to make me angry by making stupid remarks!

Now that I am expecting a baby boy, the first grandson of the family, they dont't even show much care & concern for me and our baby!
It was only until my hubby asked them to prepare some bird's nest for me that they did so ONCE throughout my pregnancy thus far, which was last week. SIGH! When I visit them with my hubby, they dont't even ask me how I am with my pregnancy or ask me if I need them to cook anything for me to eat. I'm already 6mth + pregnant but they dont even ask if I would need help with my confinement or whatsover.

It's my own mum who will prepare nutritious meals for me when I visit my parents' place. So my mum will help me with my confinement.
My in-laws treat their own daughters well but not me well. My mother-in-law helped my sister-in-law with her confinement. I do complain to my husband that they are very biased.

Even when we had our house-warming, my parents-in-law did not even bother to come although we invited them - one went overseas, the other had something on. My sisters-in-law came, empty-handed. As usual. They didn't even bother to give an ang pow to us when we got married. Unlike my parents who gave us an ang pow for good fortune and our friends who gave us simple house-warming gifts, from ang pows to photo frame to fair price/cold storage/robinson's vouchers to bless us and our love nest.

I invited them to my place and cooked dinner for them last year when we moved to our love nest. Till now, I had not even done so for my own family.
I tried to be a good daughter-in-law to them but I just feel that since they are not reciprocal, then I should not try so hard to please!

My hubby says we should ask them to help look after our baby when I finish my maternity leave and need to go back to work. But I really think they are not going to treat our baby well. They fuss over my sister-in-law's girl a lot and shower her with too much attention and too little discipline. I also dont't like the fact that my mother-in-law would stick food into her mouth before she give to the kid. Very unhygienic!!!

Hi hi excited mum,
Look on the bright side k :biggrin:. If you feel better it'll be good for bb too, so important for you to be well emotionally.
Yah I guess if you dun expect much from your PIL you'll feel better? And dun compare cos it'll usually only make us feel bad. I'm sure in their hearts they know that you are a nice DIL !

 

[cygo]

Hi cygo,

Lol... I guess it'll be kinda boring? Seems like i've been hearing the same dialogue from the gynae past few visits.. Till i start to wonder is that all the gynae gona say to me? ;p oh plus, " are your vitamins enough? "

That's all.. Like no connection .. Quite predictable. I mean its good to hear everything's good and well.. Etc.. But as first time mums, i thought it would be .. Just nicer, you know? I guess its cos most gynaes are too used in the industry.. Nothing new to them

Anw kinda too late cos i've signed up the gynae package... Haizzz.. Kinda envy other mtbs when i hear them relate 'warmer' sessions with their gynae..


Oh and one more thing, do any of the mtbs here have specific birthplans to share with their gynae?

Hi Hidz,
yaya, i laughed when i read your " are your vitamins enough? "

but then again, sometimes no news is good news.
for my 2nd baby, i had to do CVS (Chorionic Villus Sampling (CVS)).
it was very worrying & need lots of care after that. but had a big relieve when the result is -ve.
the procedure is physical & waiting for result is mental torture .

i think gynae not being too warm cos the Q is long .
the person being served wanna be served well, the person waiting wanna get served quick.
for me is, i like my gynae's professionalism when i delivered my 1st baby & he is very particular bout doing up the stitches, so i go back to him .

a friend of mine did a birth plan w his wife, but i m not sure how close they follow.
as for me is when the time comes, the time comes. :001_302:

no planning is ever enough for our babies