everyone's asking when i'm planning for a 2nd one!!

[candy_ian]

wanna vent my frustration!! ny mil came by for dinner today and kept asking me when i wanna have a 2nd one n she say since i'm so free not working, have maid why not have a second one? feel like screaming loh.. after she left i tell my hubby she din contribute a single bit during my pregnancy till now my son's 7 months still sare to say and her daughter's mil is staying with them to look after her bb and she wakes up at 12noon loh.. me leh? i wake up at 7 am n i breastfeed in the nite too.. think i'm not tired ah..
my planning with hubby is to wait till son is 3 yrs ols then decide if we wan another one just bcos hubby knows i'm doing everything gotta do with son though i have maid but i never let my maid handle son's things and morever i won't employ maid for long the most until son is 2 yrs then wanna let him b independent.
ai yah say already also angry.. din even boil any soup or bother to check on me during pregnancy the min she see her grandson also never ask me how i am.. sian..

 

[Clover88]

i havent had one and family starting do the same to me. but they dont understand me and hubby situation. think they just can ask and will contribute nothing in the end (except my parents). feel angry sometimes when they buzzing but i let it go lah..let them say anything they like cause in the end i am the one who know what will i face and when i am ready.

one of my sister in law told me that it's the life cycle..there's time we are hurried to get married, then hurried to have child then another child then another..another..another thing...so just take it easy with all people say, just take their say but still we are the one who decide what to do what not do or not to do..yet.

Cia yo! ^.^

 

[candy_ian]

yah don't ppl understand? If i wanna have bb but no responsibilties leave everything to maid then i can have a dozen but i'm someone who wants everything hands on n loves bonding.. Cannot understand those ppl.. Think bb are toys

 

[apollo]

i rmb stonston mummy also posted a similar thread b4..

those ppl are really SICKENING! we mummies (esp sahm) may seem to be v free BUT we're actually doing lotsa things! just for our baby!! 1 baby we alrdy so shag liaoo where got time for 2nd one? plus, i'm sure finance plays an impt parts for most parents too...

if someone can give me 5k every mth, i dont mind having a 2nd one NOW. so i can hire a maid to do ALL the hse wk for me while i can fully focus on my 2 babies.. haha!

 

[candy_ian]

i can't imagine getting pregnant now n missing my son's first step n can't roll around with him.. Omg then i'll b sitting like a rock whole day.. Sometimes i feel like telling him hubby since his mum wanna have another bb to play with why not she have one herself n she'll know how tiring to look after 1 nowadays compared to older days.. My mum tells me to stop at 1 at the rate i'm investing in my son if a 2nd one comes my son gonna b hell cos he's an attention seeker.. Haha

 

[chiro]

i also kena ppl asking when second one coming..initially i wanted bb girl.. But now my son is so cute n i want tofocus all our love n attention on him.. I myself is an only child too..hehe...

 

[chiro]

my mum also ask me to stop at 1 haha

i can't imagine getting pregnant now n missing my son's first step n can't roll around with him.. Omg then i'll b sitting like a rock whole day.. Sometimes i feel like telling him hubby since his mum wanna have another baby to play with why not she have one herself n she'll know how tiring to look after 1 nowadays compared to older days.. My mum tells me to stop at 1 at the rate i'm investing in my son if a 2nd one comes my son gonna b hell cos he's an attention seeker.. Haha

 

[fioncess]

mi too.. my baby only 4mth i dun wanna have 2nd 1 till 2 or 3 yrs later.. i wan to be by my baby when she learn how to crawl, walk etc.. pregnant how to be by her?? carry also gt problem...

 

[EnFlor]

Don't bother about what other pple are gonna say. When u feel bothered, u get stressed out. It is your own life, just plan things at your own pace. When pple ask u such sensitive qs again , if u wanna be nice, just smile at them. But if u wanna make them shut up 4ever...give a good and jaw-dropping rebuttal

Eg: "When we are going to 'do' it tonight, i'll let u know."
" Yeah, we can't wait coz everyday horny."
"Yup, don't worry, we plan to have 5, one year one bb and we plan to let u babysit all 5 of them."


That will make these pple SHUTTUP!!!!!

 

[stonston]

I found my perfect solution:
I just reply, "Can you guarantee that it'll be a girl? If yes, I'll go have one NOW!"

Shuts them all up
I can't use the money thing with my family cos they'll just give us money which me & hb dun like.

 

[meiteoh]

A lot of Asian people can be really nosy! You would never get a French asking questions like this unless they are super super close but even then, it's taboo to butt your nose into people's affairs especially when it comes to family issues.

Y'know, before I gave birth, my parents were already talking about me having a 2nd one and all. I just ignore them. I anticipate that my relatives will bug me about it when I go back to KL end of Nov and like the others, I'd either just smile or form a nice rebuttal.

 

[Ting]

hmmmmm, so far, i hadnt get any of these yet.
haha.
but the amt of time n money invested in one child is alr so much, how to hv another one NOW?
esp when the first child is still so young!
me n my bf plan to hv our second child when pin is at least 5 or 6 yo.
that is IF we decide to hv another child.
but if my relatives do bug me, i would just ask them (in a jokingly sarcastic way): "so u're gonna help me to take care n raise my kid for me arrh? n give me monthly allowance to pay for the kid's expenses???? hahahahah!" this shld shut them up.

 

[chiro]

my response is the same as yours!!!

hehehe

if with my church frens, i will say "if its a girl, amen to it...if its a boy, forget about it!!"

:we2arghh:

I found my perfect solution:
I just reply, "Can you guarantee that it'll be a girl? If yes, I'll go have one NOW!"

Shuts them all up
I can't use the money thing with my family cos they'll just give us money which me & husband dont like.

 

[chiro]

sometimes i can't help but think that ppl who ask such questions are trying to strike a conversation..but my response sure shut them up

 

[diymummy]

Hahahaha. Yeah. It's very irritating. Before I had my first, parents and in-laws were asking when we'd have one.. After I had my first people ask when's the 2nd. Really irritating. Not to mention that when I was preggers with my first my parents said straight in my face that they won't be helping... -.-"

CNY is gonna be another round of questions abt when I'm gonna have another one. I'm just gonna learn from my hubby's cousin. Just tell them that you won't be having another one. Shut them up once and for all.

My hubby's cousin told everyone when she got married that she's not gonna have children. Sorta offended the relatives who asked but she was just shielding herself from all the nosy parkers around. After 3 years, she got pregnant. Hahaha. So I'm just gonna tell my relatives that I'll stop at one. So that I can decide and plan when I wanna have my 2nd without people making insensitive comments about it.

 

[fioncess]

i still remember on the day i give birth, my mil after ask mi to give birth to 2nd 1... although i knw she mean no harm jus say say only.. but hallo!!!! ii jus give birth a few hrs ago n you ask mi this qn???

 

[apollo]

i still remember on the day i give birth, my mother in law after ask mi to give birth to 2nd 1... although i knw she mean no harm just say say only.. but hallo!!!! ii just give birth a few hours ago n you ask mi this qn???

HAHA!!! my mil didnt ask me at all.. i think she knows how tough it is to take care of a baby + it need lotsa money... only my hubby's super kaypo aunt keep asking, and she herself insist to hav 1 child only.. she dont like ppl to ask her when she is going for a 2nd one but she likes to ask me...

 

[Renzie]

hahah, I'll 1 ear in, 1 ear out. They are not the ones taking care of my babies!

 

[Jan]

I told my relatives I am going to stop at 1... and my MIL and my mum were like.... disappointed...I told them no one can guarantee my next one will be a girl...

Anyway, if I am really plannin for 2nd one... I will do it quietly until i got pregnant. So I jus told the person who ask me tat question, no plan and there will not be a 2nd one.

 

[jasyeo80]

When i'm still pregnant, my mil asked how many kids we plan to have.
Tell her, see how, after give birth then say, who know, maybe i want but hb don want.
Then after giving birth, on n off we will visit her, she still ask, so we plan to have another. She asked a few time, till i got a bit pissed off, on our way hm, i asked hb, she scared i don want to give birth already, or she scared i give birth too much.
since then, she stop asking. think my hb went to talk to her.