Sta home mums..how do u pass ur days at home?

[meiteoh]

Pink Diamonds, yeah, I did tell hubby that this time I'll do it alone coz no choice but preferably, we do like what we have always done in Switzerland when I was pregnant - we go grocery shopping together on one day and buy all that we need for the week or so.

Luckily for me, Eva doesn't cry a lot so when she does cry, I will quickly tend to her (which is mostly at night - LOL). This allows me time for a quick shower, change and all but still it's not like I can do it whenever I like. :/ Aiii, gone are those days...

Annie, ohmigod, I dont't know how my former colleague coped with taking care of two babies (her 2nd was an accident immediately after her 1st) and she was breastfeeding in tandem as well.

I'm actually planning for a two year gap to make things easier.

 

[annie]

lol me too! was thinking to 'make' another one when my girl reaches 2 yr old lol.

i cant imagine.. at night.. newborn cry for milk, then wake my girl up.. then how i take care of 2 bb?? can die man...

 

[glenndanker]

yes, at times i feel very very very tired! i sleep lesser compared to lst time when i wk in retail line, 12hrs shift everyday... haha! but everything is worthwhile as long as i can see dear son grow up everyday, reaching diffe milestones which always never fail to amaze us... haha:tlaugh:

Hi, as years go by and when you see the fruit, you be so pleased that you did whatever you can when he is young. We are not going to experience another childhood with them and it will never happen again. But do bear in mind, whenever discipline is necessary, don't forget to carry it out. Quality time spent is worth alot more than money.... When you feel tired, do give time and space for yourself, you deserve it. Maybe sometime you can ask for some help from mum or in laws politely, I am sure they be glad to give you a hand ocassionally... Have fun and enjoy....

 

[apollo]

Hi, as years go by and when you see the fruit, you be so pleased that you did whatever you can when he is young. We are not going to experience another childhood with them and it will never happen again. But do bear in mind, whenever discipline is necessary, dont't forget to carry it out. Quality time spent is worth alot more than money.... When you feel tired, do give time and space for yourself, you deserve it. Maybe sometime you can ask for some help from mum or in laws politely, I am sure they be glad to give you a hand ocassionally... Have fun and enjoy....

yup, even now, when he gives me a smile, i'll melt~ as long as ds is healthy and happy, no matter hw tired i'm, all worth it! haha..
my mum not only glad to help me, she dont even want me to bring ds out -.-"" haha

 

[Frenchkitty]

Can I rant?? I feel so angry today, nothing seems right!

The day started when we have to wake up earlier than usual today because it's the Ghost Fest 15th day and we have to bring baby to my hubby's Grandma's house for prayers.

It was a mad rush for me. I woke up early to prepare baby's bath, bathe and dress him , clear up the bath equipment, feed baby etc.
Settled my son already, then my turn to go bathe and get dressed. Hubby still sleeping like a pig.

In the process of my mad rush, I left my worn T-shirt on the bed and half-drank Yakult and packet drink on the table.

When my Hubby woke up, he picked a fight with me, saying why am I so untidy blah blah.. Cant I just finish the drink and throw it away instead of leaving on table? And Why do I have to leave my clothes all over the place?
I was like.. WTH?! I never even complain that he's not helping me and here he is scolding me for being untidy?!

We exchanged a few words in raised voices and poor son cried due to this... so I just walked off and leave my Hubby to pacify my son since he thinks Im so lazy and untidy.


Anyway I was damn pissed already... after we left the house I just left it at that.. Never bring up the matter again.


Then
.
.
.
This evening back at home: At about 5.30pm, my MIL needed to go to hubby's Grandma's house again to collect something. Before she left, she told me she wont be locking the door because FIL will be back any minute.
So OK, I went inside my room with dear son because I need to pump my breasts.. So of course I closed my room door lor for privacy reasons mah.
When FIL came back, he was damn angry that the door wasnt locked and nobody was in the living room.
When I came out of my room with the EBM, I greeted him.. He replied by scolding me "Why you never lock the door?"
I explained that "Mum said dont need to lock cos you are coming back" and I just walked away, feeling damn ANGRY and FED UP!
My FIL is those MCP kind who expects MIL to unlock door for him when he is home. Sometimes when the door is locked he will comment "why need to lock?" meaning that he is coming back why lock the door.
Then now, she didnt lock the door, he also angry. And worse, he took his anger out on ME!
What I cant stand is he has hands right?! Cant he just bloody hell use his keys to open the damn door so my MIL wont have to leave it unlocked and all this wont have happened.

When Hubby came home I couldnt take it anymore had a BIG fight with him.
In our room I shouted "Cant expect me to sit in the living room with red carpet just to wait for him to come back and open door for him right?! I dont have to do my things ah? Dont have to EBM, dont have to look after baby ah?!"
"Everyone thinks Im at home everyday shaking legs and not doing anything is it?? That's why you expect everything to be in order and neat & tidy?? One Tshirt cannot be out of place.. drinks must immed finish and throw away?
Then you jolly well go hire a god damn maid!"

I was so loud and dont even care whether my inlaws heard me.. better still if they did. Cant be bothered anymore.
So fedup.. These stupid men ought to be shot!
And its stupid "little women" like my MIL who spoil our women market

 

[apollo]

Can I rant?? I feel so angry today, nothing seems right!

The day started when we have to wake up earlier than usual today because it's the Ghost Fest 15th day and we have to bring baby to my hubby's Grandma's house for prayers.

It was a mad rush for me. I woke up early to prepare baby's bath, bathe and dress him , clear up the bath equipment, feed baby etc.
Settled my son already, then my turn to go bathe and get dressed. Hubby still sleeping like a pig.

In the process of my mad rush, I left my worn T-shirt on the bed and half-drank Yakult and packet drink on the table.

When my Hubby woke up, he picked a fight with me, saying why am I so untidy blah blah.. Cant I just finish the drink and throw it away instead of leaving on table? And Why do I have to leave my clothes all over the place?
I was like.. WTH?! I never even complain that he's not helping me and here he is scolding me for being untidy?!

We exchanged a few words in raised voices and poor son cried due to this... so I just walked off and leave my Hubby to pacify my son since he thinks Im so lazy and untidy.


Anyway I was damn pissed already... after we left the house I just left it at that.. Never bring up the matter again.


Then
.
.
.
This evening back at home: At about 5.30pm, my mother in law needed to go to hubby's Grandma's house again to collect something. Before she left, she told me she wont be locking the door because father in law will be back any minute.
So OK, I went inside my room with dear son because I need to pump my breasts.. So of course I closed my room door for privacy reasons mah.
When father in law came back, he was damn angry that the door wasnt locked and nobody was in the living room.
When I came out of my room with the EBM, I greeted him.. He replied by scolding me "Why you never lock the door?"
I explained that "Mum said dont need to lock cos you are coming back" and I just walked away, feeling damn ANGRY and FED UP!
My father in law is those MCP kind who expects mother in law to unlock door for him when he is home. Sometimes when the door is locked he will comment "why need to lock?" meaning that he is coming back why lock the door.
Then now, she didnt lock the door, he also angry. And worse, he took his anger out on ME!
What I cant stand is he has hands right?! Cant he just bloody hell use his keys to open the damn door so my mother in law wont have to leave it unlocked and all this wont have happened.

When Hubby came home I couldnt take it anymore had a BIG fight with him.
In our room I shouted "Cant expect me to sit in the living room with red carpet just to wait for him to come back and open door for him right?! I dont have to do my things ? Dont have to EBM, dont have to look after baby ?!"
"Everyone thinks Im at home everyday shaking legs and not doing anything is it?? That's why you expect everything to be in order and neat & tidy?? One Tshirt cannot be out of place.. drinks must immed finish and throw away?
Then you jolly well go hire a god damn maid!"

I was so loud and dont even care whether my inlaws heard me.. better still if they did. Cant be bothered anymore.
So fedup.. These stupid men ought to be shot!
And its stupid "little women" like my mother in law who spoil our women market

yalo, EVERYONE (or maybe 99%) thought we sahm v easy. everyday at hm mahh, at hm means nth to do! my hubby also often say "aiyo why leave this here and there?" my mum scolded me when i didnt have the time to tidy up my bed. but they dunno that i really got not much time.. ya tidy bed needs ard 5min only but i also need that pathetic 5min for meal right? of cos if i hav spare time, i'll sure tidy up everything in order...

and u're right, those typical kampong women spoilt the market thus some guys are still v MCP!

dont angry liaoo.. they will nv understand how tough being a sahm mum is, how many thing we need to do a day...

 

[Renzie]

That's the problem nowadays. That everyone think that when you stay at home means you got time to shake legs and have all the time in the world.

I'm pregnant now and staying at home. Luckily hubby understands that I get tired very easily nowadays, thus he never demands much from me. He even helps me with the household chores.

 

[meiteoh]

Unfortunately for us SAHM, that's the mentality that people have. I have lost count of how many times people have hinted or outright say that I must have a lot of time on my hands since I am a SAHM or that I should go back to work instead of sitting at home, waiting for my hubby to come home.

I used to get really upset at these comments (some of which came from my own mother who looks down on SAHM yet can tell me that I should take care of Eva full time - WTH) but after a while, I chalk it down to ignorance and instead feel sorry for these people. Like regina said, they don't know how tough it is and they'll never know.

 

[apollo]

Unfortunately for us stay at home mum, that's the mentality that people have. I have lost count of how many times people have hinted or outright say that I must have a lot of time on my hands since I am a stay at home mum or that I should go back to work instead of sitting at home, waiting for my hubby to come home.

I used to get really upset at these comments (some of which came from my own mother who looks down on stay at home mum yet can tell me that I should take care of Eva full time - WTH) but after a while, I chalk it down to ignorance and instead feel sorry for these people. Like regina said, they dont't know how tough it is and they'll never know.

eversince preg till now, everyone keep asking why dont i go bk to wkforce and ask my mum to quit her job and take care ds.. but my mum is not willing to. i can understand also.. she can bring hm 1300-1500 per mth, if she quit her job, and i go out to wk, i dont think i can afford to give her 1.5k every mth... and she's only 49this year. and she said if she quit her job, 2yrs later ds go childcare, she'll be v bored staying at hm and by then, will anyone wanna hire a 51year old auntie?

many ppl just dont understand this! they will even suggest nanny or maid to me. i personally dont trust them, and i rather take care of ds on my own. though will be abit tight but just save abit here and there and i can see ds growing process, meeting his milestones, why not??

i have a aunt, who has been a sahm for more than 10yrs and only recently, these few years she came out to wk. she got the nerve to say i'm very 'eng' means free at home!!! she sounds as if she v look down on sahm mum! i think she has forgotten that she was a sahm for more than a decade! crazy woman!

 

[annie]

frenchkitty, my parents same as your parents in law leh lol. my dad dun like to bring keys out n expect my mum to be home to help him open the door when he comes back de.. then sometimes my mum inside rm never hear him calling(my house door bell spoil) then when she go out a bit late to open the door, he flare up n kao bei kao bu with all the vulgar language etc etc. i think my mum very ke lian.. but then.. my dad treats us (his children) very well n very genreously.. just to my mum, he is like a monster lol.

im glad hubby dosent kao bei me on anything. i sometimes leave clothes everywhere also when in a hurry... but i dun leave drinks anywhere cos my girl n dog will take!

just 2 nights ago, hubby was saying he prefer my life cos i can stay hm.. then he ask me if i prefer working or prefer staying home. i told him i both ok. then he jokingly say.. ok lets switch. i stay home to look after our girl n u go work. then i say 'no problem with me but u got to stop all your hobbies. no more jogging, surfing, taking naps cos u have to stick with our girl 24hrs a day.. no more reading books cos u cant leave your eyes off her in case she falls n all.. when she naps, pls clean house, cook for her, take your shower, go to poo etc etc. since u need to do these when she naps, i doubt i have time to rest. then if she dun nap, its difficult for u to bath n thus no time for lunch n dinner". then he say.. 'err.. sorry i think i prefer working outside' lol.

 

[Renzie]

Agree. I don't think I can fully place my trust in a maid or a nanny to take care of my child. Plus I have my own way and ideals of bringing him up.

Hubby and I had talk about the situation thus deciding that I should quit the workforce and help him in his own business instead. He hates that whenever I get stressed up and over-worked, I'll be very bad-tempered. Plus with the previous industry I was in, the environment would not be good for my unborn child.

Thus, I stay at home, and help out in his accounts. And I know nuts about it! and my in-laws expect me to just know how to handle the accounts at the snap of my fingers. And my other group of friends expect me to have all the free time in the world and that I must be a tai-tai, stay at home, shake legs and wait for hubby to bring back home the dough. Its so maddening to hear their comments at times.

 

[autumn82]

frenchkitty, my parents same as your parents in law lol. my dad dont like to bring keys out and expect my mum to be home to help him open the door when he comes back .. then sometimes my mum inside rm never hear him calling(my house door bell spoil) then when she go out a bit late to open the door, he flare up and kao bei kao bu with all the vulgar language etc etc. i think my mum very ke lian.. but then.. my dad treats us (his children) very well and very genreously.. just to my mum, he is like a monster lol.

im glad hubby dosent kao bei me on anything. i sometimes leave clothes everywhere also when in a hurry... but i dont leave drinks anywhere cos my girl and dog will take!

just 2 nights ago, hubby was saying he prefer my life cos i can stay hm.. then he ask me if i prefer working or prefer staying home. i told him i both ok. then he jokingly say.. ok lets switch. i stay home to look after our girl and you go work. then i say 'no problem with me but you got to stop all your hobbies. no more jogging, surfing, taking naps cos you have to stick with our girl 24hrs a day.. no more reading books cos you cant leave your eyes off her in case she falls and all.. when she naps, pls clean house, cook for her, take your shower, go to poo etc etc. since you need to do these when she naps, i doubt i have time to rest. then if she dont nap, its difficult for you to bath and thus no time for lunch and dinner". then he say.. 'err.. sorry i think i prefer working outside' lol.

I "used" to jokingly tell my DH, "shall we change roles" I'm bored at home and going to rot soon.. He said, no way.

 

[Frenchkitty]

Wahahah Annie well said! Excellent description of our motherly and wifely duties!
Yah my FIL is very MCP.. dont know how my MIL can stand him. My own parents are very open-minded and westernised type.. My dad isnt like that at all! So naturally I cannot really stand MCPness.

Wah meiteoh SAHM = sit at home all day with nothing to do waiting for husband to come home ah..I also wish! You tell them "While waiting for my husband, I slap on a face mask and paint my nails, sip champagne, read magazine." then fake a yawn. LOL

 

[apollo]

Wahahah Annie well said! Excellent description of our motherly and wifely duties!
Yah my father in law is very MCP.. dont know how my mother in law can stand him. My own parents are very open-minded and westernised type.. My dad isnt like that at all! So naturally I cannot really stand MCPness.

Wah meiteoh stay at home mum = sit at home all day with nothing to do waiting for husband to come home ..I also wish! You tell them "While waiting for my husband, I slap on a face mask and paint my nails, sip champagne, read magazine." then fake a yawn. LOL

why not add this in: "once in awhile i'll go high tea with my taitais frens.. occasionally will get 1 or 2 LV or Hermes to pamper myself... last week i just went Japan shopping and Hongkong for dim sum!!!"

Use brain to think laa, if we eat, slp sit, watch tv at hm, who take care of our babies??? think those ppl who make such comments or have such thinking are BRAINLESS!!!

 

[Renzie]

hm, never add in once a week have mahjong with friends?

 

[meiteoh]

Annie, I'll have you know that the last time I put on a face mask was eons ago. Facial? Urm, last facial was before my wedding - two years ago. Haircut? Last haircut was nearly a year ago. Am dying to go for one but dunno how since I have to take care of Eva. :/

So what these people are talking about, I have no idea.

 

[autumn82]

why not add this in: "once in awhile i'll go high tea with my taitais friends.. occasionally will get 1 or 2 LV or Hermes to pamper myself... last week i just went Japan shopping and Hongkong for dim sum!!!"

Use brain to think laa, if we eat, sleep sit, watch tv at hm, who take care of our babies??? think those ppl who make such comments or have such thinking are BRAINLESS!!!

This is when Iggy turns 12 yrs old.. Prob I'll have some time.. :embarrassed: Wahahahahah

 

[apollo]

This is when Iggy turns 12 yrs old.. Prob I'll have some time.. :embarrassed: Wahahahahah

HAHA!!! i doubt so... when Iggy turns 12, u still gonna wry abt his PSLE (if still have) or other exams... LOL!

my gynae used to tell me being a mother isnt easy. once the baby is born, dont expect to have a good night slp for a least 20yrs, cos a mother will always wry for their kids no matter how old they are, how much they have achieve... :tlaugh:

 

[autumn82]

HAHA!!! i doubt so... when Iggy turns 12, you still gonna wry about his PSLE (if still have) or other exams... LOL!

my gynae used to tell me being a mother isnt easy. once the baby is born, dont expect to have a good night sleep for a least 20yrs, cos a mother will always wry for their kids no matter how old they are, how much they have achieve... :tlaugh:

! How did u noe..

20yrs? WAH.. 20yrs old oredi, scare he make other gals preggie!! Eeekss!! Also worried.. :tlaugh::tlaugh::tlaugh:

 

[annie]

Annie, I'll have you know that the last time I put on a face mask was eons ago. Facial? Urm, last facial was before my wedding - two years ago. Haircut? Last haircut was nearly a year ago. Am dying to go for one but dont know how since I have to take care of Eva. :/

So what these people are talking about, I have no idea.

lol actually i have the time for masking after my girl sleeps at night but im rather lazy for it.. too dead tired n wanna sleep instead of masking hee. facial.. my last facial was when i was 4-5mths preggy i think... haircut.. i did cos hubby help me take care of my girl when i need one..